Derek Sivers podcast

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How to decide and make the best choice Jan 30, 2026

Show notes

You can do anything. But you can’t do everything. You have to decide. If you don’t decide, you get nothing.

You can think of a hundred paths to follow. But you can’t follow them all. Use time. One path now. Other paths maybe later. Otherwise you’ll never get anywhere.

How do you know what’s the best choice? Trick question! No choice is the best in itself. A choice becomes the best when you choose it. That’s when you make your decision congruent. You find plenty of proof to support it. Evidence against it is useless. You align yourself with your choice.

Best of all, you take action. By letting go of other options, you concentrate your energy and time. You make it part of your identity, and act accordingly. You become effective. You do the work that makes it a great choice.

An awesome collection of great questions Jan 29, 2026

Show notes

This is where I would share powerful questions that you can answer for big insights and change. But here’s why I’m not:

I’ve read books that have long lists of questions. But when I’m reading, I want to keep reading, not stop for hours or days at that spot, pondering every question.

I’ve read books that act like a workbook, giving many blank pages with lines, expecting you to write your answers in that space. Does anyone actually do this? It doesn’t work on the ebook or audiobook. I’d rather use my own journal.

If I put questions here, I’d think of better ones after the book is published.

So here’s what we’ll do: Go to sive.rs/u

That’s the permanent website for this book, where I’ll keep an ever-improving collection of helpful questions, free for you to take and use whenever you want. I hope you agree that it’s better than this page of this book could ever be.

Five tiny tales of reframing Jan 28, 2026

Show notes

On the Olympic podium stood the winners of the gold, silver, and bronze medal. The silver medalist was so angry at herself for not being just a little bit faster — just milliseconds away from winning the gold. The bronze medalist was so happy with herself, just milliseconds away from winning nothing.

The former student was disheartened that she was failing at everything, so she went back to visit her old teacher. When she told him her troubles, the old man said, “Guess my secret number from 1 to 100.”
“50?”
“Higher.”
“75?”
“Lower.”
With each try she smiled more, until she correctly guessed the number. Then she thanked him for the reminder that every wrong guess is not a failure, but just one step closer to success.

Two Japanese businessmen visiting Brazil had scheduled lunch to be delivered at 1pm. When the food finally arrived at 3pm, one of the men was furious. The other man was amused to witness this example of how differently their cultures treat time, and laughed at his own expectations.

A couple had been married for many years, but just divorced. The man’s friends approached him with sad sensitivity, “Oooh. You must be devastated.” But one friend greeted him with joy saying, “Congratulations! Nobody leaves a great relationship. I’m proud you both put an end to the struggle.” This made him feel better for the first time.

How long should we mourn a loved one’s death? For some people it’s years or the rest of their life. But in a traditional New Orleans funeral, musicians accompany the coffin down the street, and after a few minutes of a solemn slow dirge, the music turns festive in a happy celebration. The funeral is a parade to honor that person’s life, and the focus turns from grief to appreciation. Switching from sad to happy is always an option, even at the worst times in life.

Traits of useful perspectives Jan 27, 2026

Show notes

To list all the beliefs I’ve found useful would fill a whole book. (Actually, four books so far, since that’s what my previous books were about.) So instead, for your own ideation, it might help if I list the traits that my most useful perspectives have shared:

Direct: Go directly for what I really want, instead of using other means to get there. This requires soul-searching of my real motivations. What do I really want? And what’s the point of that? Am I keeping a job just to feel secure? Getting a university degree for the status? Starting a business for the freedom? Instead, find a more efficient path to the real end result.

Energizing: I’ll think of many smart but uninspiring perspectives, then one makes me bolt straight up in my seat, full of excitement. It inspires me to take immediate action. Note that fear is a form of excitement.

Self-reliant: It doesn’t depend on anything out of my control. It doesn’t need anyone’s approval or involvement. It doesn’t need anything to change. It works no matter what happens. It’s about the process, not the outcome.

Balancing: Lately I’ve had too much of something, and not enough of something else. Comfort versus challenge. Social-time versus me-time. Exploring versus focusing. Prioritize what’s been neglected.

Selfless: I see myself from the outside, and know that I basically don’t matter. My needs are nothing compared to other people’s, so how can I help? “Useful” means for them and the greater good.

Selfish: Generosity can go too far. Protect the goose that lays the golden eggs. Practice healthy self-respect and self-care that comes from self-worth.

Lucid and lasting: Coming from a good state of mind, not angry, hurt, envious, or upset — not even ecstatically happy. It’s smart, and still seems like a good perspective a day or week later when I’m in a different state.

Test first: No matter how certain I feel, test an idea in reality. Before deciding, try it. Before buying something big, rent it, more than once. Before quitting, take a break.

Healthy: Do the right thing — do what’s wise and good — even if I don’t feel like it. Ask my idealized highest self how to think of this.

Long-term: In the big picture of my whole life, this is just a phase. Keep my eyes on the horizon. Short-term discomfort or pain can bring a deeply fulfilling reward. Serve the future.

Compensating for bias and prejudice: Correcting a bias, like my example of bowling and frisbee, earlier in this book. Do the opposite of my instincts. If I tend to walk away, I choose to stay. When I notice I’m prejudiced against something, I choose to get to know it and appreciate it. These have been the best beliefs for personal growth.

Expand your repertoire Jan 26, 2026

Show notes

To change, reach past what comes naturally. Avoid your defaults. Get guidance outside of yourself. Use a different tool.

“Oblique Strategies” is the name of a deck of cards where each card has one creative suggestion. When making music or anything, if you get stuck, you shuffle the cards, randomly pick one, and apply what it says. Some examples:

Not building a wall; making a brick.
Use an unacceptable color.
Honour thy error as a hidden intention.

I had a poster on my wall of twenty different circles painted by twenty different artists. Each circle had a very different style, color, filling, and texture. When I didn’t know what to do, I’d think how each artistic approach could be metaphorically applied to my life.

Now I learn about foreign cultures, and try to really understand the different worldviews. Instead of judging, I try to see the benefits of their perspective. I travel to inhabit philosophies.

In the spirit of all this, I wrote a book called “How to Live” that presents twenty-seven vastly different approaches to life, each taken to an extreme. It’s meant to be used like the oblique strategies or the paintings of circles. I consider this book (“Useful Not True”) to be like a prequel for that, so consider reading it next, in the mindset of reframing and finding other perspectives.

Diamond in the trash Jan 25, 2026

Show notes

When things aren’t going well, you’re in a bad state of mind. If you ask yourself a healthy question, like “What’s great about this?”, your answer will probably be “Nothing! This is just bad!”

Don’t be so sure. Push past that first thought. Keep asking. You can always find something useful.

Use what you learned about brainstorming. Don’t stop at the second or third answer. Come up with crazy ideas.

Use what you learned from jigsaw puzzles. Start with the edges. Come up with extreme and ridiculous ideas that you’d never actually do, but are good for inspiration and finding the middle.

We resist good ideas that require us to change. You think you’re not that kind of person? Not yet, but you can be. Keep all ideas around.

You seem to be locked in a jail cell. But if you know there’s actually a secret exit, you’ll look harder, pushing and pulling everything until you find it.

You seem to be holding a bag of trash. But if you know there’s actually a diamond inside, you’ll sift through the junk until you find it.

Your mind has a lot of trash, and often tells you there’s no way out of your situation — there’s nothing great about this. But if you decide that there is, you’ll keep looking until you find it.

Answer great questions Jan 24, 2026

Show notes

Pick something that’s holding you back from what you want to do, be, or feel.

It might feel like physical fact. “I’m too old.” “I can’t afford it.” Even if you are old and have no money, that has not stopped others, so that’s not the real problem.

Beliefs are often self-fulfilling. Whether you think you can or can’t, you’re right. Think nobody will love you? Think there are no opportunities? You can make bad dreams come true.

Doubt limitations. What’s another way to see it? What perspective would help? Ask better questions.

“I’m too old” becomes “How can I use my age to my advantage?”

“I can’t afford it” becomes “How can I afford it?”

Every problem becomes “What’s great about this?”

Go back to your favorite books, movies, thinkers, or heroes. They’re your favorites for good reason. They have lessons or wisdom you can use. What did they teach you? What would they say?

Ask any AI to list empowering questions. There’s no shortage of great questions. But don’t just ingest them. You have to really answer them.

Who chooses your (next) thoughts? Jan 23, 2026

Show notes

You might say, “I can’t help the way I feel”, as if it’s completely out of your control — as if you have no choice and are unable to feel any other way. But you do have a choice. Think a different way and you’ll feel a different way. You choose your reaction. Not the first one, but the next.

There’s a crucial moment in between when something happens and when you actually respond. It’s an important life skill. It’s as simple as this:

Something happens.
Get past your first emotional reaction.
Consider other ways of looking at it.
Pick one that feels empowering or useful.
It shapes how you feel and what you’ll do.

Simple, but not easy. The hardest part was getting past your first reaction.

You choose how you think and feel. You choose your meanings. Other people’s judgements, values, and meanings are also inside of you, but you can replace these with your own.

If you don’t choose your perspectives then you leave them up to mood, manipulation, or your worst impulses. Control your thoughts or be controlled.

The most useful part of this book Jan 22, 2026

Show notes

Imagine you’re reframing a painting. First, you remove the old frame. Then you try different frames.

The first three parts of this book were helping you remove the old frame. That was just preparing for this. Now it’s time to try different frames.

Explore many different ways of looking at your situation — finding perspectives you’d never considered before. Where you felt stuck, you’ll see a great way out. You’ll find an angle that excites you. What was cloudy will be clear plan of action. You’ll see a smarter strategy. Where you felt haunted, you’ll feel at peace.

These are the powers of reframing.

Philosophies are instruments Jan 21, 2026

Show notes

Los Angeles, 1952. Igor Stravinsky, the composer, was 70 years old, and rehearsing the orchestra.

A young girl who lived next to the orchestra hall snuck in through the back door to listen to the rehearsals. She watched the violins, cellos, flute, trumpet, clarinet, harp, percussion, and piano. She wondered which one should be her favorite. There were too many options. She needed to pick one. During a break, she got up the courage to ask the maestro.

Stravinsky’s friend and writer Robert Craft was there, so that’s why this moment is captured.

The young girl went up to Stravinsky and said, “Excuse me. Which of these instruments is the best one?” He was surprised and amused, and took the challenge.

He said, “You hear sounds, but I hear life. Every instrument is a philosophy. Every philosophy is an instrument.” She just looked at him, confused, so he continued.

“You could pick just one instrument, one philosophy. But wouldn’t it be more interesting to play them all?”

The girl said, “What?!? Nobody can play them all! How could I?”

Stravinsky said, “Let’s say, as a young woman, you go out into the world to meet new people, full of multiculturalism and humanism. You do something daring, filled with optimism. Then you start a family and have time for nothing but pragmatism. You lose a loved one and comfort yourself with stoicism. But it makes no sense, so you’re drawn to existentialism. See? So many instruments!”

The girl said, “What if I want to pick just one?”

He said, “Most people do pick just one. They think their instrument is the best! Go ask anyone in this orchestra, and they’ll give you indisputable proof why their instrument is better than all others. You’ll never convince that cellist that the clarinet is better, so why try? Just like religions, cultures, and philosophies, right?”

There was a long pause. The girl said, “So, which do you think is the best?”

Stravinsky smiled and said, “Time.”

“Time?”

“Time! I can separate the instruments with time. Or I can combine them at the same time. Different instruments for different times in the music. Different philosophies for different times in your life. You can play every instrument, and every philosophy, if you use time, and combine. Time itself is my favorite instrument.”

The girl seemed satisfied, and walked back to the balcony to listen again.

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