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Dateable: Your insider’s look into modern dating and relationships — Relationships
Dateable: Your insider’s look into modern dating and relationships

Is monogamy dead? Are we expecting too much from dating apps? Do we even want to find love anymore? Get all the answers and more with Dateable, your insider’s look into modern dating that the New York Times, HuffPost, and Oprah Daily call one of the top podcasts about dating, love, and relationships. Listen in as Yue Xu and Julie Krafchick dig into why we date the way we do. Together we'll navigate modern dating with more compassion, fun, and intention so you can create the love life you've always wanted!

Join us every Wednesday as we talk to real daters and experts about the entire gamut of modern dating and relationships – from securing your anxious attachment, choosing the right partner for you, healing from your breakup to dating in your 30s and beyond. Make sure to send us your burning dating questions as we answer them every Sunday!

If you're looking for a podcast that's relatable and full of emotional support and substance, then look no further. Let us be your biggest cheerleaders as you navigate dating in this crazy Dateable world.

Send us your brunchtalk questions at hello@dateablepodcast.com or leave your question in a review!

Follow us @dateablepodcast on IG and join the private 'Big Dateable Energy Facebook group. Check out our website for more content and join our Finding Your Person Program!: https://www.findingyourperson.com/

Dateable is part of the Frolic Podcast Network. You can find more outstanding podcasts to subscribe to at frolic.media/podcasts

Copyright: © All rights reserved

Latest Episodes:

What's More Important Than Being Chosen: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To) Apr 24, 2026

Show notes

Why do we place so much weight on being chosen and what does it actually get us? In this episode, we dig into how we’ve confused attention with real investment and chased validation instead of asking whether we felt genuinely valued. We reflect on the subtle ways performative dating shows up and how societal pressure keeps us focused on being picked and why the relationships worth having are built more so much more than simply being chosen. Enjoy!

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Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

S22E11: Rewiring Your Attachment Style w/ Thais Gibson Apr 21, 2026

Show notes

We all know our attachment styles greatly impact how we show up in dating and relationships, but what do we do if we have anxious or avoidant tendencies? We’re joined by attachment expert Thais Gibson, who shares how we can rewire our brains and nervous system to feel more secure. We discuss the ways that our childhood wounds directly correlate to our attachment styles, how to reprogram the subconscious beliefs that leak into our love lives, and why it's completely possible to reprogram your attachment style so you can date in a way that feels liberating.

To learn more about Thais Gibson follow her @thepersonaldevelopmentschool and go to https://university.personaldevelopmentschool.com/. Get her new book 'The New Attachment Theory: Heal Every Relationship by Rewiring Your Brain and Nervous System' wherever books are sold.

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How To Tell It’s The Right Relationship: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To) Apr 17, 2026

Show notes

If you’ve ever questioned whether a relationship is “right” you’re not alone. In this episode, we unpack how our understanding of healthy relationships has evolved over time, and why the ones that actually last often feel steady and grounding rather than dramatic or intense. We reflect on past experiences where chemistry and excitement were mistaken for compatibility, and how that mindset kept us stuck in patterns that didn’t truly serve us. Enjoy!

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Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

S22E10: Regaining Self-Trust In Dating Apr 14, 2026

Show notes

In a world full of opinions, algorithms, and endless advice, learning to trust yourself has never been harder—or more important. In this episode, we unpack how modern dating and decision-making have become clouded by external noise, from social media to AI, and why reconnecting with your intuition is key to clarity and confidence in dating. We discuss the risks of crowdsourcing every decision, how to build a “self-trust library” through small, consistent actions, and why regaining self-trust will help you massively reduce the time spent on dating to allow you to focus on the good parts!

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How Not To Choose The Wrong Partner: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To) Apr 10, 2026

Show notes

If you’re like 46% of our audience, you may be afraid of choosing the wrong partner—and that fear can keep you stuck overthinking every decision or holding onto something that doesn’t feel right. In this episode, we share why the real mistake isn’t picking the wrong person—it’s staying too long when it’s not working. We discuss what we wish we could tell our younger selves to relinquish this fear and actually get into healthy relationships (and leave ones that are draining our time, energy, and mental health!) Enjoy!

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Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

S22E9: How To Spot A Narcissist (And Not Give Them Your Time & Attention) w/ Dr. Alina Kastner Apr 07, 2026

Show notes

Whether you’ve questioned if someone in your life might be a narcissist or just want to better understand toxic relationship patterns, we’re breaking down what narcissism really looks like and how to protect yourself. We’re joined by Dr. Alina Kastner, who shares why these relationships are so detrimental and how to recognize the warning signs to gtfo of these unhealthy dynamics. We're discussing what really defines define narcissistic abuse, why narcissists often target the people you'd least expect, and how to heal from this type of relationship if you were to find yourself in this situation.

TW: This episode talks about psychological abuse and touches on sexual and physical abuse.

To learn more about Dr. Alina Kastner follow her @dr.alinakastne and go to https://www.alinakastner.com/en. Get her new book 'Break Up With Narcissism: How to Break Free and Stay Free – the 4-step Plan For Surviving Narcissistic Abuse' wherever books are sold.

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Mixed Signals: What We Learned The Hard Way (So You Don't Have To) Apr 03, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever wasted time trying to decode people who are giving mixed signals? If you've spent hours re-reading messages, overanalyzing tone and holding onto potential, this one is for you. Or if you're just starting to date in your 20s and want to avoid all this time wasted, this something you need to hear right now. We're sharing what we learned the hard way so you don't have to experience it too when it comes to mixed signals. Enjoy!

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Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

S22E8: Dating Again After You Thought You Found 'The One' Mar 31, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever had a relationship where you thought "this is it" only for it to crumble right before your eyes? Add in if there was any infidelity or other betrayals and ooph – no wonder it's hard to get back into dating and trust again. We're talking to Greg about what he's discovered 3 years post-divorce about dating again, navigating the apps, and healing through it all. We discuss what it means to date with your values at the forefront even after betrayal, ways to really confront the trauma so it doesn't follow you into the next relationship, and how to rebuild trust in yourself (and others) so you can ultimately find happiness again.

TW: While overall this conversation is very positive, there are mentions of infidelity and suicidal thoughts at the beginning.

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Quickie w/ Julie: Dating Skills vs. Relating Skills Mar 27, 2026

Show notes

If you find yourself getting dates but they never turn into relationships, you may be over-indexiing "dating skills" and undervaluing "relating" ones. In this episode, Julie breaks down the difference between dating skills (the spark) and relating skills (the glue), and why most people obsess over chemistry but ignore the skills that actually build connection. If you’re cycling through almost-relationships, or wondering why nothing sticks, this episode will show you how to refocus your attention to skills that actually are more natural to begin with!

Take the Dating Archetypes quiz now: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

S22E7: Secrets From A Modern Matchmaker w/ Jaydi Kuba Samuels Mar 24, 2026

Show notes

Whether you've tried matchmaking yourself or just learned about it from TV, we're giving you a behind the scenes look into the art of the setup and what it truly means to have success when using a matchmaker. We're chatting with Jaydi Samuels Kuba, a Hollywood matchmaker, about all the challenges and benefits of matchmaking – and how to make it work for you. We discuss what she's learned from years of observing dates (you'd be surprised at the nervous dating habits that come up!), how to understand client preferences vs dealbreakers to bring them the best match, and the ways she's helped so many clients (including herself!) have their last first date.

To learn more about Jaydi follow her @matchmadeinhollywood and go to https://www.ljmatchmaking.com/. Get her new book 'Your Last First Date: Secrets from a Hollywood Matchmaker' wherever books are sold.

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Take our Dating Archetypes quiz: https://howtobedateable.com/

Read our book: How To Be Dateable: The Essential Guide To Finding Your Person and Falling in Love: https://howtobedateable.com/

Try the Dateable AI Dating Coach: Get personalized advice trained on our years of podcast episodes, courses and frameworks: https://studio.com/dateable

Follow us @dateablepodcast, @juliekrafchick and @nonplatonic. Check out our website for more content. Also listen to our other podcasts The Psychology of Relationships and Exit Interview available on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.

WE WROTE A BOOK! HOW TO BE DATEABLE (Simon & Schuster) is available now: https://howtobedateable.com/ Have you ever had a time in your life where you genuinely didn’t want a serious relationship but still wanted connection and chemistry? Download the Fling app in the app store or visit fling.me today. Want to remove distractions from your dates? Download Brick and get 10% off at https://www.getbrick.app/DATEABLE
Our Sponsors:
* Losers Part One and Two by Harley LaRoux: Go get the book wherever books are sold in print or ebook or through https://www.kensingtonbooks.com
* Omaha Steaks: Try the Burger Perfection Flight at OmahaSteaks.com today. That’s 20 premium steak burgers for just $79.99. Plus, get $35 off with promo code BEEF.
* Quince: Download the Quince App for app-exclusive offers and get free shipping and 365 day returns at https://quince.com/dateable
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

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