Crystal Paine Show

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

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313: You Have an Addiction and What to Do About It (with Ian Cron) Aug 12, 2025

Show notes

I am so excited to be sharing my incredibly insightful conversation with author Ian Morgan Cron with all of you! Ian Morgan Cron is the author of The Fix: How the Twelve Steps Offer a Surprising Path of Transformation for the Well-Adjusted, the Down-and-Out, and Everyone in Between! Listen in as he discusses the book and vulnerably shares his own personal journey with addiction and the power of the twelve-step program in transforming his life.

Ian explains how addictions, whether they be to substances, behaviors, or relationships, are a common human experience stemming from an underlying "uneasiness" or "feeling of not-at-homeness." He highlights the fact that everyone struggles with some form of addiction that provides temporary relief but ultimately diminishes us.

Ian touches upon the twelve steps and opens up about his battles with approval-seeking and workaholism, revealing how the twelve steps helped him let go of the need for external validation. He encourages listeners, however, to approach the journey of transformation with patience, as it is a slow process of rewiring deep-seated beliefs and habits.

Our conversation also digs into Ian's expertise in the Enneagram personality typing system, and he talks about his new Enneagram assessment tool that provides accurate, in-depth insights into one's personality type and subtypes. He shares how understanding the Enneagram has profoundly impacted his own relationships and self-awareness.

Throughout our conversation, Ian's vulnerability, humor, and wisdom truly shine through, making this a must-listen episode for anyone seeking greater wholeness, authenticity, and connection in their life! I hope that you enjoy my conversation with Ian Morgan Cron!

In This Episode

[0:35] - Welcome to the show, Ian Morgan Cron, author of The Fix!

[2:12] - Ian admits that writing so vulnerably was hard but that he chose honesty over image to help others grow.

[5:55] - I do sometimes contort myself to get approval, seeking validation in relationships more than online.

[6:39] - Ian explains how he outgrew childhood approval-seeking and now regards his self-worth independently from others' opinions.

[9:32] - I reflect on how replacing self-critical lies with truth took me two years of intentional rewiring.

[11:28] - Addictions ultimately stem from inner discomfort; we soothe it with “fixes” that quickly become destructive cycles.

[13:50] - Ian explains how addiction comes from trauma, biology, and environment, offering temporary peace in a chaotic inner world.

[15:16] - Addiction is often a misguided solution to a deeper pain.

[17:55] - Ian further explains how addiction is any unhealthy dependency on people, behaviors, and/or substances to seek peace and self-worth.

[20:36] - Hear how Ian fully embraced the twelve steps after a relapse.

[22:46] - Relapse rewired Ian’s brain but ultimately led to humility and healing.

[25:16] - Ian shares how open twelve-step meetings can feel sacred, filled with laughter, vulnerability, and genuine human connection.

[26:41] - The twelve steps guide the healing process and eventually become second nature.

[29:59] - Ian feels that making amends can deeply impact others and keeps us emotionally cleaned up.

[32:24] - Hear how Ian co-developed a scientifically rigorous Enneagram test to replace misleading, clickbait personality quizzes.

[34:35] - Accurate personality assessments reveal deeper truths, while cheap ones often mislead and waste emotional energy.

Links & Resources

The Fix: How the Twelve Steps Offer a Surprising Path of Transformation for the Well-Adjusted, the Down-and-Out, and Everyone in Between by Ian Morgan Cron

Ian Morgan Cron

Books

The Road Back to You: An Enneagram Journey to Self-Discovery by Ian Morgan Cron

The Story of You: An Enneagram Journey to Becoming Your True Self by Ian Morgan Cron

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

312: A true story of brokenness, redemption, and the power of a biker’s prayer with Angie Howell Aug 05, 2025

Show notes

Angie Howell is the author of the recently released book Jewel of Heaven: A Beautiful Story of Brokenness, Redemption, and the Power of a Biker’s Prayer, and I am so happy to welcome her to the studio for this episode! She joins me to share her inspiring story about what can happen when your world unravels in a way that you never saw coming and God shows up through the last people you'd expect.

Angie shares how she was a confident pediatric nurse respected, in demand, and able to fix almost any newborn feeding challenge – even though her personal life was a mess. In the midst of a failing marriage and parenting seven children, she found herself pregnant again and unraveling.

Listen in as Angie talks openly and honestly about the shame that she carried, the guilt with which she wrestled, and how her faith had gone dormant until a persistent cousin named Rich (a Harley-riding, leather-wearing, tattooed biker who’d found Jesus) refused to let her stay in the dark. Angie shares the moment when she finally allowed his biker prayer group to pray over her fragile baby girl, Jade, a moment that truly changed everything for her.

Angie and I discuss what it feels like to walk into a waiting room full of children with visible disabilities and have your pride shaken. We talk about miracles that can’t be explained, even by top neurologists, and we talk about what it means to become a warrior mother out of necessity, to join a community of parents who empathize, and to see value and beauty where the world often looks away.

At the end of the day, this isn’t just Angie’s story. It is a story that will challenge how you see struggle, faith, and the people God chooses to work through! Tune in for Angie's inspirational and powerful insights!

In This Episode

[0:35] - I am interviewing Angie Howell, author of Jewel of Heaven!

[1:37] - Angie reflects on having felt successful at work but spiritually lost until her daughter and faith changed everything.

[4:45] - Angie’s unexpected pregnancy crushed her sense of freedom during an already crumbling third marriage.

[6:10] - Angie now understands the need for grace and support after struggling alone through overwhelming guilt.

[8:46] - Angie wishes that someone had told her that God would meet her in chaos and never leave.

[10:53] - Being helpless to save her newborn shattered Angie’s confidence and led to some deep emotional reflection.

[13:27] - Over time, Angie learned to find small daily miracles in her daughter’s life and spirit.

[16:32] - Angie reveals how seeing children with disabilities shattered her pride and forced her to confront her own biases.

[18:22] - A simple act of kindness can uplift parents of children with special needs.

[20:41] - Angie reveals how a brain scan confirmed her deepest fear, that Jade’s condition was severe, irreversible, and likely fatal.

[22:40] - Angie feels that she relied too heavily on doctors and Google, forgetting that ultimate healing comes from God.

[24:15] - Reluctantly allowing bikers to pray over Jade, Angie witnessed God move in a moment of doubt.

[26:50] - After the prayer, Jade’s MRI showed a normal brain, an inexplicable but undeniable miracle.

[29:41] - Angie believes that God used misfits and relentless love to rescue her when she was spiritually drowning.

[32:48] - Angie’s story has become one of transformation, meant to help others find faith and hope.

[35:03] - Angie now carries her book while traveling, offering it wherever the Holy Spirit leads her.

Links & Resources

Jewel of Heaven: A Beautiful Story of Brokenness, Redemption, and the Power of a Biker’s Prayer by Angie Howell

Books

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

311: Changing My Mindset with Food Jul 29, 2025

Show notes

Today’s topic is a really vulnerable and honest one and I've been sort of hesitant to cover it. But while putting yourself out there like this is a little scary, it's been impacting my life so much that I wanted to share in hopes it might help and encourage someone else.

In this episode, Jesse and I sit down and talk about my journey of changing my mindset around food and the major shifts that I have experienced in the last few weeks. I talk about why I signed up with a dietitian (it's fully covered by insurance for me and most people!) and what I thought I would get out of it and how it's completely not panned out like I thought!

During my first session, I had some pretty big "a-ha" moments as the dietitian challenged some of my long-held beliefs. She asked me a lot of questions and then explained to me that in eating too few calories for years, especially while under immense physical and emotional stress, I have actually been hurting my body.

I discuss how, over the following weeks, I really struggled to increase my calorie intake, as it felt like "too much food" after restricting for so long and I was scared. I went through a period of intense anxiety and stress as the weight didn't immediately come off, and I ultimately realized that I needed to break free from this unhealthy mindset and get rid of the scale altogether.

I am now focusing on nourishing my body and listening to my hunger cues rather than obsessing over macros or calories. I have experienced a new freedom and energy, I'm working through and processing so much, and I hope to break this cycle for my kids and set an example of true health and wholeness!

This is just the beginning of my journey, but I am so excited to continue to heal and share the process transparently!

In This Episode

[0:36] - I am discussing my as of yet unhealed struggles with food.

[2:24] - Hear how I discovered a dietitian service covered through insurance, prompting some clarity around my health goals.

[9:08] - Despite years of dieting, I couldn’t lose the last five pounds after my fourth pregnancy.

[11:18] - Repeated dieting and surprise pregnancies left my body stressed and resistant to weight loss.

[14:07] - Parenting, fostering, writing books, and business pressures overwhelmed me physically and emotionally.

[17:46] - Realizing that my chronic stress and calorie deficit was damaging me, I began increasing my calorie intake.

[20:00] - Although I was encouraged to eat more, I initially struggled emotionally when weight loss didn’t immediately follow.

[21:27] - Hear how I realized that my unhealthy fixation on weight was an addictive, joyless pursuit of external validation.

[24:17] - I reflect on how I clung to the scale for validation, not realizing how deeply it controlled my self-worth.

[25:14] - Jesse and I discuss how I came to realize that true health isn’t about weight loss but about feeling nourished, energized, and balanced.

[28:58] - I realized that my obsession with the scale was mentally and physically harming me.

[31:37] - Not knowing my weight daily gave me relief and began to break toxic thought patterns.

[33:30] - Hear how I replaced obsessive food tracking with photo-based check-ins, allowing space for more intuitive eating.

[35:09] - Listening to my hunger cues and eating more gave me energy and modeled balance for my kids.

[38:12] - I express gratitude for my dietitian helping me launch a healing journey.

[40:13] - I now practice gratitude for my body’s function, rewiring thought patterns toward healing and self-love.

Links & Resources

Nourish - Hire a Registered Dietitian for $0 Out of Pocket!

My Completely Honest Experience With Nourish

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

310: Making Wise Decisions in Uncertain Times (with Katie Reid) Jul 22, 2025

Show notes

I am really excited about this interview with returning guest Katie Reid, author of the new Bible study God, What Do I Do? which explores the book of Judges and the story of the prophet Deborah. Katie shares how she felt called by God to write this study, even though it took years to come to fruition, and she explains how Deborah's story has personally impacted her, especially in finding the balance between not shrinking back but also not steamrolling others. Katie highlights the importance of maintaining a close relationship with God, relying on His strength rather than our own, and being willing to step out in faith even when the path ahead is uncertain.

Our conversation touches on the challenges of discerning God's calling, the power of prayer, and the value of community, with Katie encouraging listeners to approach the Bible study with an open heart, taking time to truly digest the lessons rather than rushing through. She also highlights key takeaways from Deborah's life, such as her godly confidence and collaborative spirit.

Katie truly provides a compelling overview of what readers can expect to find in God, What Do I Do?, and her insights offer a timely message for taking on life's unexpected twists and turns by drawing near to God and leaning on His guidance. Her book promises to be a valuable resource for anyone seeking to make wise decisions and deepen their relationship with God, and I strongly encourage you to grab a copy!

In This Episode

[0:35] - Today’s conversation is with returning guest Katie Reid, author of the Bible study God, What Do I Do?

[1:10] - Katie reveals how, while visiting the Holy Land, she felt called to write about Deborah’s unique leadership.

[4:37] - Knowing that God is good helps Katie trust Him even when life gets difficult or confusing.

[6:02] - Hear how Deborah’s confidence inspired Katie to embrace leadership without shrinking back.

[8:59] - We learn that Katie’s journey has involved learning to let go of perfectionism.

[12:43] - Katie reflects on having reluctantly run for school board after many spiritual nudges confirmed that it was her calling.

[14:44] - True callings often feel scary and require deep trust and reflection.

[16:03] - Katie reflects on how obedience affects not just her but also her family and future generations.

[18:27] - Hear how rejection led Katie to write fiction.

[21:11] - I highlight how delayed fulfillment doesn't negate God's call; it often requires courageous first steps.

[23:09] - Katie suggests taking small, faithful steps now, even if the larger calling feels impossible.

[25:07] - Fear often hides beneath feeling stuck, and faith means surrendering control to God. [27:12] - Simple prayers still carry power and deepen our relationship with God.

[28:56] - Inviting God into daily moments, even small ones, opens the door to His power.

[31:58] - Katie realized that true strength begins when we stop striving and fully depend on God's sufficiency.

[34:34] - Naming your spiritual obstacles invites God's power to free, heal, and transform from within.

[36:56] - I discuss how chronic stress often signals self-reliance rather than true rest in God.

[39:19] - Deborah’s legacy showed Katie the power of godly confidence paired with intentional collaboration.

Links & Resources

The Crystal Paine Show - 142. Worship Suffocates Worry (with Katie Reid)

The Martha & Mary Show

Books

God, What Do I Do?: A Bible Study on Judges 1-5 About Making Wise Decisions in Uncertain Times by Katie M. Reid

Made like Martha: Good News for the Woman Who Gets Things Done by Katie M. Reid

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

309: Your Waiting Isn’t Wasted with DawnChere Wilkerson Jul 15, 2025

Show notes

I have truly been looking forward to this conversation with Dawnchere Wilkerson! Author of the book Slow Burn: The Work and Wonder of the Wait, I was so deeply inspired after reading it that I knew that I had to have her on the show. Her story of waiting through eight years of infertility and the profound transformation that took place in her heart during that time is incredibly powerful and encouraging.

DawnChere shares so many gems of wisdom that I know will resonate with anyone who is in a season of waiting and wondering if their story will ever unfold the way that they hope, and she discusses how waiting is not just a season but a way of life - and that the key is learning to truly live in the wait, rather than just passively enduring it.

One of the biggest breakthroughs for DawnChere was realizing her identity as a beloved daughter of God. When she grasped how deeply she is loved and accepted by her heavenly father, it gave her the confidence to live with faith and open arms even in the midst of her unreached goals. She didn't have to wait to be fulfilled or at peace because she could experience that fullness in the present. DawnChere also highlights the value of community and not isolating ourselves when we're in a hard season, sharing how investing in relationships, even when it's difficult, is where so much of our faith gets strengthened and our perspective gets broadened.

If you're in a waiting period of your own, I just know that DawnChere's story and insights will encourage you to see this season as an opportunity for transformation, rather than just an obstacle to get through. Her book is a beautiful invitation to trust the timing and find joy in the journey, even when the outcome is still uncertain.

In This Episode

[0:35] - I enthusiastically welcome the author of the book Slow Burn, DawnChere Wilkerson, to the show!

[2:00] - DawnChere has found that waiting is a lifelong journey in which purpose and transformation happen in the present.

[4:58] - Answered prayers bring greater responsibility, which requires deeper trust, wisdom, and surrendering daily.

[6:26] - DawnChere reveals that true strength came not from willpower but from surrendering to God and reaching out.

[9:30] - Discovering her identity as God's daughter gave DawnChere confidence to trust and live boldly.

[12:31] - DawnChere reveals that believing that she is loved by God helps silence self-doubt and recognize daily grace and support.

[14:08] - A generous life widens your world, connecting faith and growth through meaningful community.

[16:39] - DawnChere believes that community offers a new perspective, reminding us that there's more beyond what we currently see.

[19:30] - DawnChere argues that true friendship requires time, sacrifice, and grace.

[22:11] - Casual conversations can still carry divine impact, offering unexpected wisdom exactly when we need it.

[25:22] - Supportive friendships are a vital, irreplaceable part of life.

[27:22] - It’s important to not give up on community because authentic friendships require effort, patience, and continued pursuit.

[30:44] - Surrendering control to God brings peace, deepens faith, and strengthens friendships.

[33:24] - Seasons of waiting and hardship can ultimately transform you and lead to unexpected, meaningful blessings.

Links & Resources

Slow Burn: The Work and Wonder of the Wait by DawnChere Wilkerson

Books

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

308: My Very First Time Going to a Gym Class Jul 08, 2025

Show notes

I honestly never thought that I would be recording a podcast episode about this, but join Jesse and I this week as I share how I started going to gym classes for the first time in my life! It all started when my friend Kate told me about a gym in our area that offers free childcare. Jesse and I signed up, thinking that we could just use the childcare and work while the kids were taken care of. After all, the childcare alone made the cost worth it.

However, when it was suggested that I should take a gym class myself, I was initially completely against the idea. It truly scared me. After all, I had had a traumatic experience in PE as a young girl, where I was always the one who couldn't do the exercises and felt so embarrassed. I carried that shame with me for decades, but I ultimately decided that I needed to face that fear. I told the internet that I was going to do it, which helped hold me accountable.

Walking through that door for the first class was definitely the hardest part, but the instructor was so kind and encouraging, helping me feel comfortable as a total beginner, and something amazing happened; I kept going back, week after week. I've even started making "gym friends" and look forward to the classes. It has been so incredibly empowering to push past this fear that's held me back for so long!

Of course, it hasn't been without some embarrassing moments, like the time I had a little accident during an intense workout (listen in for those details!), but I am learning and growing through it all. This experience has made me realize how many other areas of my life that I have avoided due to fears and insecurities from my past, and I am so glad I didn't let that stop me this time. I hope my story will inspire you to identify things that scare you and help you find the courage to take that first step in facing them! You never know what good could come from conquering a fear!

In This Episode

[0:35] - Jesse and I are talking today about how I recently did something I never thought that I would do - join a gym class!

[3:33] - We initially joined the gym for childcare, but a tiny nudge led me to try a class.

[6:55] - I reflect on how childhood gym class failures left me feeling humiliated, inferior, and determined to never repeat it.

[9:42] - Jesse notes that proper coaching could have reframed my struggles as growth, not lifelong self-judgment.

[10:23] - Hear how I began replacing old shame with courage, embracing things that once terrified me.

[13:20] - To help hold myself accountable, I told the internet and asked one of our daughters to go with me for moral support.

[15:34] - Hear how I chose a beginner class, asked for help, and felt welcomed by a kind instructor.

[18:21] - Conquering my fear, I now attend regularly and look forward to it!

[21:33] - I discuss how the instructor’s kindness and nonjudgmental attitude helped me rediscover confidence and encourage others.

[24:48] - I really appreciate the inclusive, non-competitive environment!

[26:55] - Hear about a little accident that I had during an intense class, hoping that others didn't notice.

[29:36] - I stealthily exited the gym, horrified to find the evidence painfully visible and unforgettable.

[31:38] - Jesse reminded listeners to stay clean and emphasizes that gym mishaps happen more often than people realize.

[33:09] - I invite listeners to reflect on their own fears and take one bold, courageous step forward this week!

Links & Resources

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

307: How to Fight Less and Thrive More in Marriage (with Gabe and Rebekah Lyons) Jul 01, 2025

Show notes

This book we are talking about today is so authentic and vulnerable and I really appreciated the authors being willing to open up like they did. In their new book The Fight for Us: Overcome What Divides to Build a Marriage That Thrives, Rebekah and Gabe Lyons share their personal journey of overcoming challenges in their marriage, discussing how writing the book together was a vulnerable process that forced them to confront their own issues and communication problems.

Join me as Rebekah and Gabe highlight how early trials in their marriage -- such as having a child with Down Syndrome -- could have torn them apart but instead brought them closer together. They stress the importance of leaning on and supporting each other during difficult times rather than retreating. The Fight for Us explores the "four dysfunctional dances" couples can find themselves in - avoidant, anxious, silent, and intense - and offers readers some guidance on how to recognize and break out of these unhealthy patterns.

A key theme that we discuss is the need to look inward and take responsibility for our own contributions to marital problems, rather than automatically putting all of the blame on the spouse. Rebekah and Gabe encourage couples to better understand how past experiences shape their current behaviors and reactions, and they share how this self-reflection has been so integral to strengthening their own marriage over nearly three decades.

Throughout our conversation, the Lyons are refreshingly honest about their own struggles, missteps, and growth, highlighting that even strong, long-term marriages require constant work, structure, and recommitment, especially during major life transitions. The Fight for Us offers practical tips for prioritizing the relationship and creating the emotional safety needed for vulnerable conversations – a relatable resource that I highly recommend grabbing a copy of!

In This Episode

[0:35] - I am excited to welcome Rebekah and Gabe Lyons, authors of The Fight for Us, to the show!

[1:59] - For Rebekah and Gabe, sharing their story via writing deepened their healing, clarity, faith, and connection as a couple.

[4:43] - Gabe and Rebekah chose to face hardship together, building resilience via community and shared commitment.

[6:15] - We hear how Rebekah and Gabe leaned on each other when their son's diagnosis changed so much for them.

[8:11] - Gabe stresses looking inward rather than blaming your partner, while Rebekah stresses communicating hurt without automatically assuming harmful intent.

[11:14] - Hear how the book identifies four conflict patterns in couples, urging awareness for deeper emotional connection.

[14:43] - Despite initial incompatibility, the Lyons’ marriage succeeded via humility, growth, and choosing to fight together.

[16:12] - Learn how vulnerability and honest conversation helped the Lyons push through hopelessness instead of giving up.

[18:04] - Emotional safety ultimately requires mutual commitment and honesty, or vulnerability becomes difficult.

[21:29] - Understanding generational patterns clarified Gabe’s and Rebekah’s roles and helped them redefine emotional and parental expectations.

[23:46] - Reflecting on past wounds taught Gabe how vulnerability can lead to deeper connection in marriage.

[26:07] - Rebekah argues that every stage of life brings fresh conflict but that awareness and honesty help couples navigate it better.

[27:45] - Gabe has realized that, instead of fixing emotions, men must learn to validate their partner’s pain with empathy.

[30:14] - Rebekah reflects on how saying yes to too much nearly cost them their intimacy, forcing them to reprioritize.

[32:24] - Gabe argues that healthy marriages require structure, planning, and dreaming, even if it feels unromantic at first.

[34:13] - Hear how a calendar audit helped the Lyons prioritize connection and value relationships over material things.

[36:48] - Kids tend to feel safer when parents nurture joy and connection away from daily responsibilities.

Links & Resources

The Fight for Us: Overcome What Divides to Build a Marriage That Thrives by Rebekah Lyons & Gabe Lyons

Books

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

306: Our 20-Hour Overnight Getaway Jun 24, 2025

Show notes

Jesse and I recently had the chance to sneak away for a quick 20-hour overnight trip, and it ended up being exactly what we needed. With our busy schedules and the constant demands of parenting six kids, it's rare that we get uninterrupted time to truly connect and plan for the future, and this short getaway allowed us to do just that!

Before we even left, we sat down and made a list of the key things that we wanted to accomplish - reviewing our goals, talking through some challenges we've been facing, and trying to map out what the next nine months might look like for our family (a time frame that, for the record, has nothing to do with pregnancy). Having that plan in place helped us make the most of our limited time away, having begun the trip by enjoying a nice dinner out, which gave us the space to have those important conversations.

Listen in as we share the story, including how, the following morning, we headed to a local coffee shop (where we ran into several friends, much to my embarrassment since I hadn't even brushed my hair!), and over coffee, we were able to dive deeper into the practical steps we want to take to build our business around our family life and not the other way around. It was truly amazing how much we were able to accomplish in just 20 hours. We came back feeling refreshed, reconnected, and motivated.

I feel so grateful that we didn't allow the short timeframe to hold us back, and this episode of the show will hopefully help remind you that sometimes you have to get creative to nurture your marriage, even if you can't take a full weekend away. I would, as always, love to hear from you! Reach out to let me know about how you have found ways to prioritize your relationship, even in the midst of busy seasons. What tips do you have for making the most of limited time together? I'm always looking for new ideas!

In This Episode

[00:35] - We have some exciting news to share - Silas now has a driver’s license!

[03:13] - Getting his license helps simplify managing Silas’s jam-packed schedule of sports, friends, and constant movement.

[05:32] - We discuss how, after a delay for insurance, Silas safely drove alone and proved himself a careful driver.

[07:23] - Hear how I researched DMV strategies and chose the best day and time to avoid long waits.

[10:22] - I reveal that arriving early on Tuesday paid off, with fast DMV service and successful ID and license processing!

[13:33] - I talk about having to adhere to strict photo rules to renew my passport and hope to be fully licensed soon.

[14:54] - We talk about our recent short getaway which offered meaningful reconnection and some much-needed rest.

[16:15] - Hear how we created a written plan to stay focused without letting the time feel like work.

[18:33] - Planning an ABC date night brought structure, clarity, and joy to our short getaway!

[21:03] - We discussed nine-month goals which will help us prioritize needs and communicate more clearly as a couple.

[23:27] - Jesse and I discuss how people so often prioritize work over life, sacrificing needs and identity in a work-centered society.

[25:50] - I am aiming to shift from overworking toward building business around life, not the other way around.

[28:13] - With all six kids in school soon, we discussed how to use our new free time.

[30:39] - We reflect on how caretaking responsibilities for David lingered on our trip, but we did finally get some restful sleep.

[33:22] - Even though our time away was limited, we set goals, made a plan, and truly reconnected.

[35:59] - I strongly encourage intentional living, not “balance,” and I invite listeners to share marriage and work-life strategies!

Links & Resources

Social Media

crystal@moneysavingmom.com

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

305: The Devil’s Subtle Strategies: What We Miss When We’re Distracted (with Tilly Dillehay) Jun 10, 2025

Show notes

So many of you have told me you loved Tilly's clever and quirky new book My Dear Hemlock, a book written in the voice of a demon mentor coaching her underling on how to derail a Christian woman’s walk with God. Taking inspiration from The Screwtape Lettersby C.S. Lewis, Tilly’s version is tailored to the specific struggles that Christian women face today - frustration in marriage, social media distractions, pride disguised as virtue, and the slow drift that can happen in daily family life.

We talked about how the fictional format of the book gave Tilly room to say the hard things that are so easy to sidestep when we’re just trying to get through the week. She shares what it means to see homemaking not as a list of chores but as a sort of battleground on which small choices have big consequences. We also explore the temptation to fixate on a spouse’s flaws instead of tending to our own spiritual health as well as why that is so spiritually dangerous.

Tilly doesn’t just offer observations; she imparts deeply practical wisdom, things like how to build upon gratitude when your first impulse is annoyance, how to recognize when the enemy is whispering half-truths, and why community and prayer aren’t just helpful but essential. This episode will be sure to challenge you, encourage you, and make you think twice the next time that you scroll through Instagram or silently stew over a spouse's mistake.

In This Episode

[0:36] - I welcome Tilly Dillehay, author of My Dear Hemlock, to the podcast for this episode!

[1:15] - Tilly reveals how the book came to fruition.

[3:30] - Hear how writing a fictional book helped Tilly express real-life marital struggles and spiritual challenges that Christian women face.

[6:03] - Although not from a charismatic tradition, Tilly finds value in acknowledging Satan’s real influence.

[7:28] - I stress how small annoyances are spiritual battlegrounds on which we choose our response.

[10:57] - Women's imaginative power can harm relationships if misused as criticism instead of praise.

[12:07] - I warn against magnifying minor flaws in loved ones.

[14:08] - Tilly advises cultivating daily gratitude instead of scrutinizing a spouse’s faith.

[17:29] - By gently initiating nightly prayer, it's created deeper connection and communication in marriage.

[18:34] - Many marriages unfortunately fall apart from unspoken contempt that could’ve been avoided with small, daily kindnesses.

[21:34] - I point out how the media distorts women’s expectations and how prayer often gets derailed by distracting thoughts.

[22:30] - Tilly suggests praying with others and using scripture as structure for focused prayer.

[25:02] - Instead of promising prayer and then forgetting, Tilly prefers to pray immediately and let people know that she just did.

[28:36] - Tilly disabled Safari on her phone entirely because phones are ultimately designed to steal time.

[30:37] - Distractions vary per person; mine was audio, while a friend’s was compulsive online shopping.

[32:24] - Tilly asserts that homes are spiritual battlegrounds and that women play a key role in their power.

[35:55] - Tilly advises beginning with prayer and learning from godly women whose homes reflect familial, not material, richness.

[36:54] - Neglecting prayer and community can ultimately open the door to spiritual vulnerability.

Links & Resources

Tilly Dillehay’s Home Fires Podcast

Books

My Dear Hemlock by Tilly Dillehay

The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis

12 Ways Your Phone Is Changing You by Tony Reinke

Social Media