When a child’s aggressive behavior fills your home, it can stir up intense feelings in you, too. In this mini-episode, Stacy Bellward, and Certified Parent Coaches Katie Johnson and Amy Nyvall offer a grace-filled starting point for parents facing intense emotional moments at home.
Hear a hopeful perspective on what may be happening beneath a child’s anger. You’ll also find practical ways to prepare your own heart and body so you can bring greater calm, connection, and wisdom into difficult moments. Listen for practical encouragement rooted in God’s grace and the Connected Families Framework™.
Key Takeaways:
How to identify your own physical signs of stress
How empathy can build safety and connection before correction
Why small micro shifts in your response can shape a difficult moment
Encouragement for looking beneath your child’s aggressive anger
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Amy Nyvall is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach who lives near Portland, Oregon, where she homeschools her kids ages 14,11, and 9 and leads a vibrant Charlotte Mason Education Community and Co-op. Contact Amy at amynyvall@gmail.com or learn more about her here. Amy is available for coaching and speaking on the Connected Families Framework. You can even find her contributing to events on the CF Community in Mighty so you can interact with her there too.
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This podcast was made possible by members ofThe Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have youtake a seat at The Table!
When big behaviors feel scary, you have real hope.
In this mini-course, you’ll be equipped to handle aggressive behaviors with grace, confidence, and wisdom.
Using practical, evidence-based tools alongside the Connected Families Framework™, you’ll come away with a personalized safety plan and the deep reassurance that God has equipped you for this.
When your child hits you, kicks you, or says something that takes your breath away, and a single thought takes over: I have to make this stop. In this honest conversation, host Chad Hayenga sits down with coaches Lydia Rex and Katie Wetsell to explore what’s really happening beneath a child’s aggressive behavior, and why the goal isn’t to fix it magically, but to become the steady, faith-filled presence your child needs in their hardest moments. What they share might just change the way you show up on the car ride home.
If this conversation hits home for you, there’s a next step made for exactly this.
Lydia and Katie built a brand-new mini course, Confidence in the Crisis: Navigating Aggressive Behaviors, for parents who feel shaken by their child’s big behaviors. For just $28, they walk alongside you, weaving the Connected Families Framework™ together with Trust-Based Relational Intervention® and Nonviolent Resistance into one practical, faith-filled experience. You’ll leave with a personalized safety plan for your family, evidence-based strategies you can use right away, and deeper trust that God has equipped you for this very moment. With a plan, what once felt unsettling can become an opportunity to anchor your family in faith and grow closer through the hard things.
Key Takeaways:
What aggression really is, and the deeper emotions often driving it
The physical and brain-body factors parents often overlook: sleep, nutrition, neurodivergence, pain, and more
Why the Connected Families Framework still applies, even when bigger struggles are at play
How to move from “I have to make this behavior stop” to “God has equipped me for this moment”
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Lydia Rex is the Director of Family Support for Bien Aimé (bee-ehn eh-MAY) Farm, where she works with families who have adopted children. She is a registered nurse, Connected Families certified parent coach, Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) practitioner, and co-hosted the Sensitive and Intense Kids online course with Lynne Jackson. No stranger to the challenges of the parenting journey, Lydia offers empathy, encouragement, and a deep commitment to walking alongside parents through the Connected Families Framework. It’s her joy to see God’s grace healing the hearts of parents and children. Lydia, her husband Kyle, and their two kids live in Minnesota, where they enjoy homeschooling, outdoor activities, and reading lots of books. You can learn more about Lydia’s work at Bien Aimé Farm and get in touch at bienaimefarm.org.
Katie Wetsell has always had a calling on her heart to care for children. She has worked as a pediatric oncology nurse and pediatric nurse practitioner. After experiencing the benefits of parent coaching through Connected Families, Katie later resigned from nursing and became a Certified Parent Coach. She and her husband have four children (three boys and a girl) through birth and adoption. Katie is also trained in SPACE, an adaptation of Non Violent Resistance, that helps parents learn how to support their children struggling with anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorders. You can learn more about Katie at parentwithhope.org, and on Facebook @parentwithhopecoach and Instagram @parentwithhopecoach.
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
Love the podcast? Leave a review to help other parents find shows like this one.
This podcast was made possible by members ofThe Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have youtake a seat at The Table!
When big behaviors feel scary, you have real hope.
In this mini-course, you’ll be equipped to handle aggressive behaviors with grace, confidence, and wisdom.
Using practical, evidence-based tools alongside the Connected Families Framework™, you’ll come away with a personalized safety plan and the deep reassurance that God has equipped you for this.
The best parenting support often comes from something simple: walking alongside one another instead of carrying the hard moments on our own.
That’s the heart of today’s conversation, as host Stacy Bellward sits down with Dr. Cindy Wilson (Director of Education, Equipping, and Research) and Lori Menekheim (Ministry Partnership Manager) to explore why growing in community makes such a difference. Whether you’re a parent craving encouragement, a friend wanting to gather a few neighbors, or a church leader hoping to support families well, there’s something here for you.
Much of that community can grow through Connected Families small groups, and Cindy and Lori make the case for why this Fall is the time to start one. Along the way, they share their own journeys, share a story of one group’s transformation, and practical answers about the courses, registration, and the support leaders receive.
And if the thought of leading makes you nervous, they have good news: perfection isn’t the point. Transparency and a willingness to grow together are. As Fall approaches, consider whether God might be nudging you to gather a few parents and grow in grace, wisdom, and confidence together. Listen to the full episode for the encouragement and next steps to get started.
Key Takeaways:
Growth happens best in community, and walking alongside other parents builds wisdom, peace, and confidence on the hard days
You don’t have to be an expert to lead. Your honest, imperfect moments are often what free others to grow
Practical tips for starting a group of your own, from choosing a course to the support leaders receive from Connected Families
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Cindy Wilson is a CF-Certified Parent Coach and a Certified Family Life Educator with 20+ years in children & family ministry and academia. As Director of Education, Equipping, and Research for CF, she helps churches, schools, and other organizations use CF resources to equip and support families in their community. She is also helping collect data to show the impact of CF resources on parents and families. Cindy lives in Florida with her husband of over 30 years. She has three adult children, one son-in-law, four grandchildren, and a farm full of animals.
Lori Menikheim is a wife, mom of two strong-willed teenage girls, and Kids Ministry leader with over 15 years of experience. She is CF’s new Ministry Partnership Program Director, where she helps churches, schools, and other Christian organizations use CF resources to equip and support parents in their communities. When she discovered Connected Families, she finally found the language, tools, and hope to parent well and lead ministry well. Now she loves connecting with parents and ministry leaders who want to partner with God in reaching the next generation.
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
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This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
What to Do About Bad Grades on Your Child's Report Card (Without Nagging)
Aug 10, 2026
Have you ever felt like your child just doesn’t care about their bad grades on their report card, no matter how much you push, remind, or worry? In this audioblog, adapted from two of our blog posts, guest host Chad Hayenga closes out our four-week back-to-school series with one of the most freeing questions a parent can ask: “Whose problem is it, really?” Discover why pushing harder often backfires, how the 4 messages of the Connected Families Framework™ can break the anxiety-nagging cycle, and how to trade the role of manager for the hopeful role of mentor.
Key Takeaways:
Discover the “anxiety-nagging cycle”
Learn how the 4 messages of the Connected Families Framework can breathe life back into a relationship strained by report-card tension
Learn one simple question to ask yourself to free yourself to become your child’s encourager instead of manager
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
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This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
Back-to-School Season: When "I Hate You" Rides Home from Pickup
Aug 05, 2026
“I hate you!” When those words fly on the ride home after school, it’s easy to feel stuck. In this back-to-school season mini episode, host Stacy Bellward pulls back the curtain on a live cf community group coaching call, where Certified Parent Coaches Katie Johnson and Pam Bjerke work through one of the most common back-to-school challenges parents face. Get a taste of how walking a real parenting question through the Connected Families Framework™ can shift your whole perspective.
Key Takeaways:
Why your child’s behavior is a message, not the whole story.
How to model and offer language that honors others while staying true to how your child really feels.
What changes when you meet a hard moment with empathy and curiosity before correction.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
As a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, Pam Bjerke brings warmth, wisdom, and practical insight to every audience she serves. With experience speaking to diverse groups across the U.S., Haiti, and the Dominican Republic, she has led workshops and trainings for moms’ groups, adoptive and foster parents, trafficking survivors, schools, churches, teachers, and more, at both online and in-person events. Her goal is always the same: to offer grace-filled messages and actionable strategies grounded in the Connected Families Framework™ that participants can immediately apply at home or in the classroom. Pam is a licensed early childhood teacher and has training in TBRI, Conscious Discipline, and Interplay Play Therapy. She holds a certification in ARC Trauma Treatment for Children and Adolescents.
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
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This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
Toddler Separation Anxiety: Why Does My Toddler Cry at Drop-Off?
Aug 03, 2026
Those tearful drop-offs at preschool can leave any parent feeling shaken or unsure of what to do next. In this episode, host Stacy Bellward reads one of our most popular blog posts as an audioblog, exploring what’s really happening beneath the surface of separation anxiety.
If you’ve ever navigated toddler separation anxiety, you’ll discover a new perspective on the hidden factors behind your child’s fears of drop-off, and how to help.
Key Takeaways:
Why crying at drop-off is often completely normal and can actually reflect healthy, solid attachment.
Learn how several hidden factors can feed your child’s fear of separation, and understanding them changes how you respond.
How a shift in your goal at drop-off can make all the difference
Discover how your child’s sensitivities can become a source of confidence, joy, and compassion.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
Love the podcast? Leave a review to help other parents find shows like this one.
This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
Parenting a Neurodivergent Child: How to Advocate at School
Jul 27, 2026
That sinking feeling when another teacher’s email arrives, listing everything your child did “wrong” again? If you’re parenting a neurodivergent child, you likely know this feeling well.
In this replay episode, host Stacy Bellward talks with Connected Families parent coaches Marni Love and Taylor Irby, two moms who’ve walked this road themselves. Together they talk about what it looks like to advocate for your child with grace and confidence. Through their honest stories and practical wisdom, they explore how a diagnosis can open doors to help, how to partner genuinely with teachers, and how connection can carry families through the hard parts.
In this episode, you’ll discover:
Why releasing the family you imagined and embracing the child in front of you changes everything
Practical strategies for setting your kids up to thrive at school
What to include on a one-page advocacy sheet that helps teachers truly see your child
How to build the support that your child needs, without doing it alone
Whether you’re new to advocacy or years into the journey, this conversation offers wisdom, peace, and real confidence for the road ahead.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Marni Love is a former public school teacher who has been a home educator for 16 years. She is a Homeschool Mentor, a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach, and an instructor for CF coaches-in-training. Marni enjoys spending time with her husband, Eric, and their three sons in the beautiful mountains and beaches of Northern California. Marni is available for coaching and speaking. You can connect with her through her website, marnilove.com.
Taylor Irby is a mother to 5 kids, and she understands the struggles parents face. Every day she faces ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays, and adoption trauma. She, too, has sat in the midst of challenges and searched the world for answers. Taylor read book after book and got excited over short-lived methods. That is when she hit the wall of desperation and sought parent coaching through Connected Families. Taylor ultimately became a coach through their training program to help others like her. She has seen transformation in her home by working with a framework that has changed not only her children’s behavior but their hearts as well. You are not alone on this parenting journey. There is hope, and you can enjoy your children, build that relationship you have wanted, and see behavior change. You can learn more about Taylor on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/taylor.irby.5 and Instagram @taylorirbycoaching
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
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This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
Should I Homeschool? Discerning What's Best for Your Family
Jul 20, 2026
Asking yourself, “Should I homeschool,” this school year? It’s a weighty question—and one you don’t have to answer on your own. In this episode, host Stacy Bellward is joined by two Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches and seasoned homeschooling moms, Marni Love and Amy Nyvall, who bring 16+ years of combined experience to this conversation.
Rather than handing out a one-size-fits-all answer, Marni and Amy walk through the decision using the Connected Families Framework™. They tackle real questions submitted by the cf community and help you discern what’s best for your family!
Key Takeaways:
The decision starts with you, not the curriculum.
Your educational gaps aren’t a disqualifier. Every parent (and every school) has them.
Motivation is built, not demanded.
Your child isn’t your report card. Homeschooling doesn’t make you a better parent, and a hard day doesn’t define you
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Marni Love is a former public school teacher who has been a home educator for 16 years. She is a Homeschool Mentor, a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach, and an instructor for CF coaches-in-training. Marni enjoys spending time with her husband, Eric, and their three sons in the beautiful mountains and beaches of Northern California. Marni is available for coaching and speaking. You can connect with her through her website, marnilove.com.
Amy Nyvall is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach who lives near Portland, Oregon, where she homeschools her kids ages 14,11, and 9 and leads a vibrant Charlotte Mason Education Community and Co-op. Contact Amy at amynyvall@gmail.com or learn more about her here. Amy is available for coaching and speaking on the Connected Families Framework. You can even find her contributing to events on the CF Community in Mighty so you can interact with here there too.
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
Love the podcast? Leave a review to help other parents find shows like this one.
This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
Lonely Motherhood No More: Finding Connection, Joy, and Support
Jul 13, 2026
We were never meant to walk the parenting journey alone. In this heartwarming and eye-opening episode, host Cindy Wilson (Director of Education, Equipping, and Research at Connected Families) sits down with Crystal Wilson, the Director of Global Fundraising Strategy at Compassion International. Together, they explore the universal heartbeat of motherhood and the essential, life-giving power of Christian community.
If lonely motherhood has been weighing on you, and you’re longing to build deeper, more authentic relationships right where you are, this conversation offers a beautiful reminder of how God wired us for connection, grace, and mutual support.
Key Takeaways:
Discover the universal heart of parenthood from mothers around the world
Learn practical steps to overcome isolation
Discover powerful stories of how local churches worldwide are partnering with organizations to bring joy
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Crystal Wilson is a dynamic leader whose life purpose is to serve the world’s most vulnerable by connecting them with life-changing resources. She currently serves as Director of Global Fundraising Strategy at Compassion International, leading global and multicultural fundraising strategies fueled by her faith, entrepreneurial mindset, and passion for Christ. A graduate of the University of Michigan with a Bachelor of Arts in Communications, Crystal spent 15 years in the automotive industry leading high-performing PR and marketing teams for major brands including Cadillac, Lincoln, and Nissan. Licensed to preach the gospel at age 24, she launched and led a young adult ministry for over five years under her father, Rev. Dr. David L. Roberson, Senior Pastor of New Hope Missionary Baptist Church, and also served as Director of Children’s Church at Life Changers International Church. She is a co-founder of THRIVE!, Compassion’s Employee Resource Group that supports and empowers working mothers. Above all, Crystal’s most treasured roles are wife to Cameron Wilson and mom to Cameron Ray (14) and Christian David (11).
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
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This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
As a self-described sensitive and intense mom raising two sensitive and intense daughters, Laura Way, Content Manager at Connected Families, wraps up our summertime conflict series with a powerful tool we use called Slow, Low, & Listen, which also applies easily when you have kids fighting in the next room!
Drawing from Scripture, brain science, and her own kitchen-floor moments with her seven-year-old, Laura unpacks why our nervous systems get so easily hijacked by our children’s big emotions and offers a practical, grace-filled path forward. You’ll learn how slowing down, getting low, and listening can transform the way you enter into your kids’ hard moments.
Whether you’re navigating sibling conflict, meltdowns, or daily chaos, this episode offers wisdom and tools to help you respond with the grace-filled presence you long to bring to your parenting.
Key Takeaways:
Why your calm has to come first—and how to find it when your child’s emotions feel overwhelming
The brain science behind why a screaming child can trigger the same response as real danger
What “Slow, Low, Listen” actually looks like in real life (with Laura’s honest, in-the-moment examples)
How to move from reacting at your child to responding with your child
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside the cf community — a faith-anchored, coach-supported space where parents grow together. Reflect on episodes like this one, ask hard questions, and celebrate the small wins alongside parents from around the world.
Love the podcast? Leave a review to help other parents find shows like this one.
This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!
Today we've got the author of Good Pictures, Bad Pictures, Kristen A. Jenson, here with us to help us navigate how to talk to your kids about porn and protect them. Stacy and Kristen discuss how parents can proactively prepare children to recognize and reject pornography in our digital world. Listen in to be equipped to start the conversation with your kids.
Key points:
Start conversations about pornography as soon as children access the internet, even at ages 2-3.
Talking with kids about porn must include 3 key parts: defining, warning and making a plan
Understand the ways pornography can lead to addiction, increase vulnerability to abuse, and distort healthy views of relationships.
Use age-appropriate resources: books and tools make these difficult conversations easier and provide structured language for you to use
Mentioned in this podcast:
Screens Webinar with Matt & Jill Reed - Register Today!
Drivers Training for Social Media Online Course
Good Pictures, Bad Pictures (Ages 7-11)
Good Pictures, Bad Pictures Jr. (Ages 3-6)
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Rate this podcast to help others discover the show easily!
*This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table!*
Guest Bio:
Kristen A. Jenson is the founder of Defend Young Minds and best-selling author of the Good Pictures Bad Pictures series of read-aloud books. She is also the executive producer of the Brain Defense: Digital Safety curriculum and the owner and CEO of Glen Cove Press, LLC. Kristen is a positive voice for raising empowered, resilient, screen-smart kids who know how to reject pornography. Kristen received her bachelor’s degree in English Literature and her master’s degree in Organizational Communication. She is a mother of three and grandmother of two, and currently lives with her husband and awfully cute dog in Washington State. Connect with Kristen at:
defendyoungminds.com
Facebook: DefendYM
Instagram: @DefendYoungMinds
X: @DefendYM
LinkedIn: @DefendYoungMinds
Kids & Technology: How to Navigate the Constantly Shifting Landscape
May 26, 2025
Navigating Infertility & Loss: A Conversation with Julie Fowler
May 12, 2025
Julie Fowler, speaker and bible curriculum writer, joins us for a meaningful conversation about her journey of infertility and the resources she's created for other couples coping with infertility and loss. Julie shares how scripture helped her in her grief and how she wove her faith into intentional community connections that served as a lifeline during her years of loss and struggle. Whether you’re supporting a friend or infertility is part of your personal story, you’ll find helpful wisdom in this conversation.
Podcast Key Points:
A raw, honest account of one woman's journey through infertility to parenthood
Practical ways to maintain faith while acknowledging grief during difficult seasons
Specific strategies for building supportive relationships by clearly expressing your needs
Information about valuable resources designed specifically for those navigating infertility
Mentioned in this podcast:
Treasures in the Waiting - Bible Study for Women by Julie Fowler
Navigating Infertility & Loss - Bible Study for Men by Julie Fowler
Attachment Webinar with Dr. Nicole Wilke - Wednesday, May 14th - Register Here
Connected Families' Spanish-language podcast episodes
Join the Table - Connected Families' monthly donor community
Episode 224 | Attachment Myths Busted: How Your Attachment Style Shapes Everything
John 11
Romans 12:15
Job 17:11
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Share encouragement with other parents–leave a review where you listen most.
*This podcast was made possible by members of The Table, whose monthly support creates a ripple effect of change for generations to come. We’d love to have you take a seat at The Table! *
Guest Bio:
Julie is a curriculum writer, speaker, pastoral care leader, and executive director of Julie Fowler Ministries.
Through her years of infertility, failed adoptions, miscarriages, premature birth and loss of identical twins, Julie became devoted to helping women and couples find hope through the Scriptures and connection with others in the same trial. She founded, wrote curriculum for, and led an infertility and miscarriage ministry for over 20 years that hosted over 50 groups, locally and nationwide.
Author of two Bible Studies, Treasures in the Waiting: Finding God’s Comfort, Counsel, and Companionship Amid Infertility and Loss, and a husbands’ study, Navigating Infertility and Loss with Strength and Hope, Julie has spoken for MOPS International and The NEST and on the Don’t Mom Alone and Join the Journey podcasts. She helps churches and lay leaders start infertility ministries that share God’s heart for the hurting.
Julie and her husband reside in Dallas, Texas, and are the parents of three children. They have experienced the blessing of growing their family through both biological and adoptive routes. Connect with Julie at: juliefowlerministries.com. Or on social media at Instagram and Facebook.
The Secret Superpower Every Parent Needs: The Art of Listening
May 05, 2025
BONUS: 5 Powerful Reasons to Press Play & Transform Lives
Feb 18, 2025
Have you thought of leading a small group through one of the Connected Families video courses? This episode will answer your questions.
Small groups help combat parental isolation and create supportive communities for lasting family transformation. Host Stacy Bellward discusses the opportunity to lead Connected Families small groups with guests Pam Thompson (Certified Parent Coach) and Jacquie Danz (Small Group Coordinator). Together they discuss the benefits of small groups and answer frequently asked questions.
Key Points:
Leading a group is simplified to facilitating discussion and playing videos
No expertise required - content is provided by Connected Families experts
Cost savings: Individual course is $140 vs. $55 per household in groups
Groups provide accountability and deeper learning through community
Full support provided to leaders through Connected Families resources
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course
Union Gospel Mission (Seattle)
Ministry Partnerships page
Contact Us
Pam Thompson coaching info
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Pam Thompson is a licensed Family and Early Childhood Educator and a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach. She is a mom of two young adult children and “like a mom” to two young adults who have experienced extensive trauma. Because of her education and experiences, she especially enjoys encouraging and supporting parents of young children, parents of young adult children, parents of kids from hard places, and teachers.
Jacquie Danz is the Marketing & Small Group Coordinator at Connected Families. She first discovered Connected Families over a decade ago and now enjoys being part of the team sharing Connected Families with everyone. In her spare time, she enjoys exploring coffee shops with her husband, reading anything she can get her hands on, and spending time with her lovely teenage daughters.
The Science Behind Building Unshakeable Kids
Feb 17, 2025
Why 'Kids Are Resilient' Is Only Half the Story
Feb 03, 2025
**Content warning: this podcast discusses mental health issues, including suicide.**
Whether you're dealing with tantrums or teen anxiety, you won’t want to miss this honest, down-to-earth conversation with Josh and Rachel Keller (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) as they dive deep into the topic of building resilience in children. As therapists and educators, they share practical wisdom on why kids aren't naturally resilient and need to learn this essential life skill.
Key takeaways:
Why the common phrase "kids are resilient" can be misleading
How to help children process difficult emotions in healthy ways
Practical strategies for building resilience while maintaining connection
The spiritual component of developing resilience
Why protecting kids from all hardship can backfire
Mentioned in this podcast:
Free PDF - ABC’s of Affirmation
Galatians 5:19-26
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Become a Connected Families Donor today, and link arms with others who are passionate about building relational and spiritual health in every family and the future body of Christ.
Take a moment to rate the podcast and help other parents discover the Connected Families Framework.
Guest Bio:
Josh and Rachel are a married duo from Central Minnesota. They believe that teenagers are a wonder to behold, not a problem to be fixed. They have been married for 15 years, with three kids, one dog, a bunny, and a bird. After becoming CF Certified Parent Coaches, they launched The Freedom Center MN, a mental health practice in Willmar, MN.
Words That Shape Hearts: The Art of Blessing Your Kids
Jan 27, 2025
You won’t want to miss parent coaches Chad Hayenga and Katie Johnson exploring the meaningful practice of blessing your kids. They unpack what “blessing” meant throughout the Bible and what your heart needs to receive so that you can bless your children. And, of course, they offer plenty of ideas about when and how you can start practicing blessing your kids today.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Blog post: How to Speak Blessings Over Your Child
FREE PDF: The ABC's of Affirmation
Ephesians 1:3
Mark 10
Hebrews 11:20-21
Psalm 103
1 Thessalonians 5:15
Numbers 6:24-26
Philippians 2
Luke 2:52
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Become a Connected Families Donor today, and link arms with others who are passionate about building relational and spiritual health in every family and the future body of Christ.
Take a moment to rate the podcast and help other parents discover the Connected Families Framework.
Guest Bio:
Katie Johnson is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach living in Madison, WI, with her family. After receiving her M.Ed. from Valparaiso University, she worked for many years in education and is now on the homeschool journey with her three young children. Find out more about Katie and parent coaching here.
The Power of Affirmation: 3 Ways Your Words are Life-Giving
Jan 20, 2025
Does your child get discouraged? Does it feel like your child’s misbehavior seems to drown out the positive things you might notice? There is science behind the power of affirmation. You can learn to shine a bright spot on the small things that go well and begin to unravel this cycle of discouragement in your child. And it will bring encouragement to you as a parent, too! In today’s podcast, Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) shares a powerful and practical tool she created called the ABC's of Affirmation.
Mentioned in this podcast:
FREE PDF: Downloadable ABC's of Affirmation
I Was a Critical Parent: 7 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving Way
Is There “Miracle Grow” for Good Behavior? (The ABC’s of Affirmation)
Learn more about "The Table" community at Connected Families
Grace and Truth For Moms (online course)
Connected Families Framework
How Your Thoughts Change Your Brain, Cells, and Genes
What Your Brain Needs to Know About Neuroplasticity
Corrie Thetford, Lydia Rex (Certified Connected Families Parent Coaches)
Dr. Alan Kazdin
Philippians 4:8
Romans 12:2
2 Corinthians 10:5
1 Thessalonians 4:9
1 Thessalonians 5:11
How have you used the ABC's of Affirmation with your kids? We’d love to hear your stories! And don’t forget to check out our website for more great resources! Need more encouragement or help? Please contact us; we are here for you!
Guest Bio:
Lynne Jackson is one of the Co-Founders of Connected Families. As a parent coach and mom of three intense kids herself, Lynne has walked alongside hundreds of parents to encourage and bring hope. She is also a research enthusiast and loves leaning into the brain science and research to better equip parents and caregivers. Most importantly, as a follower of Christ, she brings biblical wisdom, abundant grace, and a “no shame” policy.
Rest for the Weary: Simple Spiritual Rhythms for Parents
Jan 13, 2025
In this episode, Connected Families staff discuss the scriptures and spiritual practices that have helped them stay connected to God in the past year. They also share their vision for the coming year and their commitment to providing "bite-sized" encouragement to overwhelmed parents. Listen in for a few simple ideas on staying centered on your Good Shepherd as you lead your family with grace.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Tell me more about The Table
Personal Retreat Guide
Hosea 11:4
1 Peter 1:22
1 Peter 4:10
1 Peter 4:8
Isaiah 30:21
Psalm 91
Silence and Solitude by Ruth Haley Barton
Lynne's Scripture Card box
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels the work to transform families. Give a gift to Connected Families today!
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3 Principles to Help Your Child Calm and Regulate
Jan 06, 2025
In this episode on calming for kids, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) talk with Stacy about what role parents play in helping their kids calm down. This conversation especially has sensitive or intense kids in mind, and the principles shared are paired with practical examples and stories from parents who’ve tested the ideas. Plus, we’ve got a free PDF for you: 50 Calming Activities (with ideas for engaging each of the senses).
Mentioned in this podcast:
50 Calming Activities PDF
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Did you find this episode helpful? Share it with a friend, and leave us a review!
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Beyond Obedience: One Mom's Journey from Desperation to Connection
Dec 30, 2024
In this podcast we chat with Danika Delello, who shares how desperate she was for help when dealing with her strong-willed child’s frequent, lengthy tantrums. She talks about switching her parenting mindset from an obedience-focused approach to one based on connection and grace through the Connected Families Framework. Danika relates how this shift allowed her to be present in a loving, affectionate way during her child’s difficult meltdowns and gave her insight into her own relation to God. We know you’ll relate to and feel encouraged by this mom’s journey to joy and connection.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Give the gift of connection to other families through a year-end financial gift to Connected Families
Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart book
Consequences That Actually Work - free ebook
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course
Ep. 197 | The Flourishing Family: Don’t Settle for Merely Surviving
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Rate the podcast! It just takes a second and it helps other parents discover the show.
Guest Bio:
Danika Delello and her husband Jared live in central Virginia, where she homeschools their three children. They love hiking in the Blue Ridge Mountains, playing board games, and reading copious amounts of books. They always seek to become more like Jesus and be a family that exemplifies him to others.
Unwrapping Regret: Making Peace with a Parenting Fail
Dec 16, 2024
If you imagine your most recent parenting fail, do you cringe or just laugh? Do you wallow in shame or regret? Today, we're talking with Dijea Young about moving beyond regret into hope. She shares experiences as a mom to 8, grandmother, and Certified Connected Families Parent Coach and explains helpful strategies for transforming regrets into opportunities, particularly during the holidays.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Episode 91 | How Can I Better Parent My Adult Children?
Episode 119 | Grandparenting Through a New Lens
Episode 184 | How to Be a Great Grandparent to Your Grandkids and Their Parents
Episode 205: Holidays Boundaries & Expectations with Family
Dan Pink: The Power of Regret
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Dijea Young is a teacher, mother of eight, and grandma. For over 35 years, she has served children and families in a variety of roles. Now as a Certified Parent Coach, she combines her professional training and personal experience to help parents and grandparents nurture relationships across generations. For more information about Dijea or her services, visit www.Room4HopeCoaching.com or email Room4HopeCoaching@gmail.com
Moving to the Same Side of the Table: A Father's Journey
Dec 09, 2024
In today’s episode, Connected Families Co-Founder Jim Jackson interviews Stephen Freeman, a father of five, who shares how Connected Families impacted his parenting approach. Through coaching and practical tools, Stephen learned to see challenging behaviors differently and developed a deeper understanding of both parenting and God as Father.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Parent Coaching
Give the gift of connection this Christmas! Give to Connected Families today.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Stephen Freeman has been married to his wife Caroline for 13 years, and they have 3 biological kids and 2 bonus kids spanning from 15 to 1. They live in Jacksonville, Florida, and have been helped by the Connected Families framework for the last 5 years. Stephen is the founder of Kairos Digital, a marketing agency that helps good organizations do great things, and is a deacon and teacher at Awaken Church.
Better Parenting Starts Here: Reframing Negative Thoughts
Dec 02, 2024
If you're not satisfied with what your parenting looks like today, maybe becoming a better mom or dad is more about reframing what you already do than finding new tips and tricks that "work" with your kids. In this episode, Connected Families Co-founders Jim and Lynne Jackson discuss the powerful practice of transforming discouraging mental "tapes" into grace-filled, constructive thoughts aligned with biblical truth. The Jacksons share practical examples of common negative thoughts like "This is just too much!" or "I shouldn't have to deal with this!" and offer redemptive reframes that lead to greater connection with your kids and make room for God’s transforming work in your family.
Mentioned in this podcast:
The Blessing by John Trent, Gary Smalley, and Kari Trent Stageberg
John 10:10
2 Corinthians 10:5
Romans 15:13
Isaiah 62:2
Ephesians 1 & 2
Check out the Connected Families website for more resources to support your parenting!
Become a Connected Families Donor today, and link arms with others who are passionate about building relational and spiritual health in every family and the future body of Christ.
Take a moment to rate the podcast and help other parents discover the Connected Families Framework.
Guest bio:
Jim and Lynne Jackson are the Co-Founders of Connected Families in Plymouth, MN. With over 50 combined years of professionally helping families and a love for working in the church, Jim and Lynne have been dedicated to bringing reliable, God-centered, research-based parenting resources to all families since 2002.
Holiday Boundaries & Expectations with Family
Nov 25, 2024
Wondering how you can set holiday boundaries and expectations for family gatherings? Are you looking forward to celebrating Christmas with family but dreading unsolicited advice from well-meaning relatives? You are not alone. Changes in your daily routines, travel, lack of sleep, and large gatherings set the stage for parenting challenges. Sometimes, other adults in your family may scrutinize these difficult situations. This may lead to comments or questions that don’t feel supportive.
On today’s podcast, Chad Hayenga (Director of Education & Equipping) and Jenna Williams (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about navigating the holidays with relatives. They specifically address how you can respond when grandparents or other family members criticize you (or your children). Role-playing possible scenarios, Jenna and Chad bring humor and practical wisdom to you just in time for holiday gatherings.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
proactive strategies to intentionally prepare your family for upcoming gatherings, including evaluating your own expectations, having conversations with your children, and even having conversations with grandparents about their expectations
roleplays to help you navigate criticism, unhelpful comments, or harsh discipline by grandparents or other relatives
that you can model humility and the value of connection to your parents and kids during holiday gatherings and difficult situations
We hope you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Christmas Bundle with your gift of $35
Discipline That Connects in the Classroom Live Webinar - Register Today
Connected Families Parent Coaching
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Program
Connected Families Framework
Unsolicited Advice? 4 Ways to Respond (Connected Families FREE PDF)
Guest Bio:
Jenna Williams and her husband, Sam, have been married for ten years. They live in Colorado Springs, CO, and have three amazing children ages 3-7. Jenna is a registered nurse by trade and works in a postpartum unit. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and loves caring for and supporting families! Connected Families has been a true blessing for her and her family, and she is excited to share that blessing with others. You can find her on Instagram @jennawilliams0411.
Being an Adoptee: What It’s Like to Grow Up Adopted
Nov 18, 2024
Today we chat with Leah Sutterlin, an adoptee, adoptive mom, and adoption advocate, about being an adoptee. Leah shares how early separation affected her later relationships and attachment style and discusses the identity struggles she experienced growing up. She also explains how her parents' supportive approach allowed her to openly process grief and embrace her adoption story. Listen in to gain insight to support adoptees in your life!
Mentioned in this podcast:
An Adoptee's Perspective: What's It's Like to Be Adopted & How to Help
Connected Christmas Bundle - New Resource available with your gift of $35 to Connected Families
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Give a gift to Connected Families today and give the gift of connection to families looking for hope.
Rate the podcast–it only takes a second and helps other families find the show!
Guest Bio:
Leah Sutterlin has worked for several organizations in the adoption and foster care space, including the National Council For Adoption and the Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO). She is an adult adoptee currently residing in Sunnyvale, California, who tries to raise awareness about the value adoption can bring to families.
Sleep Solutions for Tired Families: Expert Advice
Nov 11, 2024
Listen in as Connected Families Co-Founder Lynne Jackson and Christina Spaeth-Harrer, pediatric occupational therapist, share their expert insights on improving family sleep. From managing bedtime routines to incorporating sensory-friendly activities, Christina and Lynne offer practical tools for common sleep challenges. They also discuss the importance of emotional connection and integrating faith to build healthy sleep habits. You’ll feel equipped and encouraged to help your family rest well.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Transform Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime Snuggles (Sleep Ebook) - Free Download
Psalm 46:10
Why We Sleep by Matthew Walker
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
We invite you to join the transforming work God is doing in families across the globe. Donate to Connected Families today!
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Guest Bio:
Christina Spaeth has over 20 years of experience providing sleep consultation, holistic, sensory integration, developmental, and aquatic occupational therapy. She has worked in a variety of settings, including clinics, schools, group homes, foster care and home care, and private practice with children and adults. Christina lives in Minnesota with her husband and three children. You can learn more about the services she provides on her website.
Practical Classroom Management Strategies That Work
Nov 04, 2024
Are you a teacher working to create a nurturing classroom environment while managing behavior well? Whether you teach in a school or volunteer at church, this conversation is for you. Dr. Cindy Wilson, Partnership Program Manager at Connected Families, and Maggie Rocke, a kindergarten teacher, and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, join us to explore how to effectively apply the Connected Families Framework in the classroom. Maggie shares practical applications for the classroom while Dr. Wilson explains how the 4 messages of the Framework can build resilience in students and address underlying issues they may experience. We’re excited for you to hear how the Connected Families Framework can transform classrooms.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects in the Classroom LIVE webinar December 2nd - Register today–it’s FREE!
Ministry Partnership Program - Register for a Discovery Session to learn more
Framework Posters PDF (5 posters in all)
ABCs of Affirmation
Matthew 12:34
Galatians 6:1
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Give a gift to Connected Families and support transformation in families around the world.
Help others discover the Connected Families Podcast–take a second to rate the show on your favorite platform.
Guest Bio:
Cindy Wilson, PhD., CFLE, is a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach and a Certified Family Life Educator with 20+ years in ministry and academia. She helps churches and other organizations integrate the Connected Families Framework into their communities. Cindy lives in Florida with her husband of 31 years. They have three adult children, one son-in-law, one grandson, and a farm full of animals. Cindy’s specialties include leading parenting workshops on the Connected Families Framework and other topics, training children’s ministry volunteers, helping churches integrate trauma-informed practices into their ministries, and organizing church-based foster care ministries. You can find out more at http://www.familylifesolutions.org.
Maggie Rocke is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and teaches kindergarten at a Christian school. This is her 11th year in the classroom, having previously taught kindergarten, special education, and preschool. She loves utilizing the Connected Families Framework in the classroom and encouraging other teachers to do the same. She and her husband have an 8-year-old and a 6-year-old at home.
Overcoming: How Adversity, Challenges & Childhood Trauma Can Shape Our Children in Positive Ways
Oct 28, 2024
Dr. Nicole Wilke joins us to talk about what it takes to raise kids who can overcome everything from daily challenges to childhood trauma. Nicole discusses nurturing resilience by reframing challenges positively and the importance of fostering your child’s connection with God. She emphasizes modeling resilience for your kids and integrating resilience-building moments into your daily conversations and chores. Listen in to grow your understanding and feel equipped to help your kids become "overcomers" ready to face life's challenges.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Overcoming: What Scripture & Science Say About Resilience by Dr. Nicole Wilke & Dr. Amanda Hiles Howard
Connected Families Partnership Program
Free webinar: Discipline That Connects in the Classroom
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Were you inspired by this podcast? Donate to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Nicole Wilke, Ph.D., is a researcher, missionary, author, and marriage and family therapist dedicated to improving care for vulnerable children and families globally. She currently serves as Director of the Christian Alliance for Orphans’ Center on Applied Research for Vulnerable Children and Families, bridging research and practice to improve care for vulnerable children and families around the globe. Her passion for this work stems from her family's experience with adoption and fostering. Having lived on four continents, Nicole currently resides with her family in Peru, where they work to improve the system for children in alternative care.
Resilient Children Are Raised, Not Born
Oct 21, 2024
Join us for a powerful conversation with Jim and Lynne Jackson about raising resilient children. They encourage you to focus on the process and long-term perspective of building character and identity rather than focusing on the result of the task at hand. Whether you're dealing with homework struggles or life's bigger challenges, you’ll feel equipped with hope and purpose to nurture resilience in your children.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Blog post: Know a Child Who Gives Up Easily?
James 1
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Were you encouraged by this podcast? Donate to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Jim and Lynne Jackson are the Co-Founders of Connected Families in Plymouth, MN. With over 50 combined years of professionally helping families and a love for working in the church, Jim and Lynne have been dedicated to bringing reliable, God-centered, research-based parenting resources to all families since 2002.
BONUS: Exciting Podcast News!
Oct 19, 2024
You may have heard our exciting news: The Connected Families podcast has reached an amazing milestone - two million listens! 🎉
We're touched by how many of you have tuned in from across the US and around the world over the past five years. Thank you for listening and sharing with others who could use a little parenting encouragement.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Were you encouraged by this podcast? Donate to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Ruth Chou Simons: Using Psalm 23 to Communicate God's Presence to Children
Oct 14, 2024
Author and artist Ruth Chou Simons chats about life with God, and her first children's book, Home Is Right Where You Are. Ruth shares insights on pursuing God's grace daily and passing it on to our children, emphasizing the importance of reminding kids that their true home is with Jesus. She explains how you can have meaningful faith conversations, using her book as a starting point, and encourages you to nurture your heart with God’s grace to guide your children toward their home in God.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Home is Right Where You Are
Foundations - Family devotional by Ruth & Troy Simons
Ephesians 2:8-10
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation makes this podcast possible. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate the show and help others discover The Connected Families podcast!
Guest Bio:
Ruth Chou Simons is a Wall Street Journal bestselling and award-winning author of several books and Bible studies, including her new children’s book, Home is Right Where You Are, Beholding and Becoming, TruthFilled and Now and Not Yet. She is an artist, entrepreneur, podcaster, and speaker, using each of these platforms to sow the Word of God into people’s hearts. Through social media, and her online shop at GraceLaced.com, Simons shares her journey of God’s grace intersecting daily life with word and art. Ruth and her husband, Troy, are grateful parents to six boys—their greatest adventure.
https://ruthchousimons.com
https://www.instagram.com/ruthchousimons/
https://www.instagram.com/gracelaced/
https://www.facebook.com/gracelaced
https://www.pinterest.com/gracelaced/
gracelaced.com
The Flourishing Family: Don't Settle for Merely Surviving
Oct 07, 2024
In this episode, Jim and Lynn Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, chat with Dr. David and Amanda Erickson from Flourishing Homes and Families about their new book, The Flourishing Family: A Jesus-Centered Guide to Parenting with Peace and Purpose. The Ericksons share their journey of integrating Christ-centered theology with modern neuroscience to provide a holistic approach to parenting. They explore gospel-centered gentle parenting (while addressing common misconceptions) and reframe discipline as discipleship. Practical insights help parents build trust-based relationships with children.
Mentioned in this podcast:
The Flourishing Family: A Jesus-Centered Guide to Parenting with Peace and Purpose
Ep. 108 | Kids and Misbehavior: Is It Sin? Or Something Else?
Ep. 96 | Doctrine of Grace in Parenting
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our listener-supported podcast. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
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Guest Bio:
Dr. David and Amanda Erickson are the founders of Flourishing Homes & Families, a ministry that educates, empowers, and equips Christian parents to lead their families through parenting principles rooted in Jesus' teachings. With David’s background in theology and Amanda’s love for child development, they’re passionate about helping parents find harmony at the intersection of Jesus-centered theology and modern neuroscience.
David previously served as a pastor and spent fourteen years as a seminary theology professor. In 2023, he became president of Jacksonville College, where he guides the faculty and staff in preparing students to lead Jesus-centered lives that transform churches, communities, and the world. A former foster mom and pastor’s wife, Amanda is an artist with a free spirit and can often be found watercolor painting, sipping coffee on her front porch swing, making up silly songs for her two boys and dogs, and hiking the woods near their home on a little farm in East Texas.
Website: flourishinghomesandfamilies.com
Instagram: @flourishinghomesandfamilies
Facebook: flourishinghomesandfamilies
Give Yourself Grace with the Do-Over
Sep 30, 2024
In this episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson talk with Ruth Wharton about the transformative power of "do-overs." They unpack how this practice mirrors the gospel by encouraging us to give ourselves grace, seek forgiveness, and mend relationships. They share the simple steps involved and how do-overs grow and evolve as your children do. By modeling grace and humility through do-overs, you can start to transform the culture in your home today.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects online course - Register Today!
Romans 2:4
Acts 3:19
1 John 1:9
2 Corinthians 7:10
Romans 10
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
We are a listener-supported podcast. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Help others find grace-filled parenting tools! Share this episode with a friend or rate the show on your favorite platform.
Guest Bio:
Based in Malvern, Worcestershire, Ruth Wharton is the first Connected Families Certified Coach in the UK. She is a mum of five and has a background in primary school teaching. She works part-time for a local charity supporting people with autism. Ruth worked alongside her husband for twelve years as they looked after 60 teenage boys in an English boarding school. She is passionate about parenting with grace and unconditional love. The Connected Families Framework has united her and her husband in the challenge of simultaneously raising our teenagers and toddlers. She’s loved seeing the benefits of connected parenting shape each of her children to become more confident, happy, and emotionally secure. You can find out more about coaching with Ruth at: https://connectedfamilies.org/listings/ruth-wharton/.
Strengths and Weaknesses: What a Child's Misbehavior Tells Us
Sep 23, 2024
When faced with your child's misbehavior, it's tempting to focus on their weaknesses: poor emotional regulation, lack of self-control, or dishonesty. But what if you could see beneath these struggles to recognize the God-given strengths hidden within? At Connected Families, we affectionately refer to these strengths as "gifts-gone-awry." Listen in as Connected Families Co-Founder Lynne Jackson sits down with 22-year-old Lucy Browning and her parents, Ted and Jill. Together, they share how identifying and nurturing Lucy's "gifts gone awry" transformed her challenging behaviors into shining strengths that now bless others. Their story will encourage and inspire you.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Lucy’s Graduation Speech - Chaska High School 2020 (speech begins at 21:11)
Luke 16:1-8
Sibling Conflict online course
Parent Coaching
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation makes the podcast possible. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
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Guest Bio:
Ted and Jill raised their three daughters in Minnesota, where Jill is an elementary school teacher, and Ted is a mechanical engineer. They are adjusting to life as empty nesters this fall. Their eldest daughter, Lucy, graduated from Wheaton College last spring and now lives in the Washington, DC, area. The Brownings are all about road trips and enjoy a good podcast!
Payoffs & Accidental Rewards: How to Focus on the Right Stuff | Ep. 194
Sep 16, 2024
Have you ever noticed bad behavior increasing the more you attempt to quell it in your child? You might be facing a situation of payoffs, accidental rewards or misplaced "focus fertilizer." In this episode, Chad Hayenga and Jim Jackson unpack how parents often react and unintentionally reward undesired behavior. They demonstrate how shifting from frustrated reactions to genuine engagement can transform challenging moments into opportunities for connection and growth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects online course - Join or Lead a Small Group!
Discipline That Connects online course - Special Pricing for Individuals
James 1:19
James 3:13
Romans 2:4
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
We are a listener-supported podcast. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to share this episode with a friend, or rate the show on your favorite listening platform.
Guest Bio:
Jim and Lynne Jackson are the Co-Founders of Connected Families in Plymouth, MN. With over 50 combined years of professionally helping families and a love for working in the church, Jim and Lynne have been dedicated to bringing reliable, God-centered, research-based parenting resources to all families since 2002.
Chad Hayenga joined Connected Families in 2005. He is married to Carma and has three adult daughters and two sons-in-law. Chad oversees coaching and the Parent Coach Certification Program, which continues to grow in its reach across North America and worldwide.
Agape Love: The Surprising Time Your Child Needs It Most
Sep 09, 2024
Showing love is easy when your child is doing well, but what does it look like to extend selfless agape love to a child who is misbehaving? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, Connected Families Co-Founders, share about receiving God’s unconditional love and effectively passing it on to your child (in the midst of struggles!). This conversation is packed with scripture and practical tools to encourage and equip you.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline that Connects with Your Child’s Heart book
Discipline that Connects online course - Register Now!
Small Groups - Join a Discipline That Connects small group
Free PDF - 20 Phrases that Communicate Empathy to Our Kids
Romans 5:8
Romans 2:4
Hebrews 4:15-16
John 14:16
Luke 15:11-32
Ephesians 3:20
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!Help others find the encouragement they need by sharing this episode with a friend or rating the podcast.
Guest Bio:
Jim and Lynne Jackson are the Co-Founders of Connected Families in Plymouth, MN. With over 50 combined years of professionally helping families and a love for working in the church, Jim and Lynne have been dedicated to bringing reliable, God-centered, research-based parenting resources to all families since 2002.
How to Talk to Your Child About Difficult Topics (Part 2)
Aug 26, 2024
Expanding on last week’s episode, Josh and Rachel Keller use role-plays to show how you can engage in a difficult conversation with your child. They offer insights for choosing a time and place that will help foster meaningful dialogue and highlight the importance of listening and empathy as you enter the conversation. If you’re feeling unsure about the weighty or awkward conversations you need to have, this episode will give you a boost in confidence and some practical ideas for a great, connected conversation with your child.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Ep. 191: How to Talk to Your Child About Difficult Topics (Part 1)
The Power of Questions online course - Less Arguing. More Wisdom.
Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Every donation, whether big or small, empowers another family to parent with confidence and lead with grace. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a second to rate the show or share this episode with a friend. We’re so grateful if you do!
Guest Bio:
Josh and Rachel are a married duo from Central Minnesota. They have been married for 15 years, with three kids, one dog, a bunny, and a bird. After becoming CF Certified Parent Coaches, they launched The Freedom Center MN, a mental health practice in Willmar, MN.
How to Talk to Your Child About Difficult Topics [Part 1]
Aug 19, 2024
Whether it's swearing, sex, racism, or a loved one's choice, talking about difficult topics is a requirement of parenting. Listen in as Josh and Rachel Keller, MA, LPCC (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches), join us to share practical ideas for approaching difficult conversations with kids of all ages. In their light-hearted and humorous way, they encourage us to reflect, embrace the awkward, and lead with curious questions. You’ll feel encouraged and equipped for your next tough conversation. And don’t miss next week’s episode, where Josh and Rachel roleplay awkward and challenging conversations.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Ep. 174 | Want to Connect with Your Teenager?
Philippians 1:6
Proverbs 18:2
Proverbs 18:13
The Power of Questions online course: Less Arguing. More Wisdom.
Discipline That Connects online course
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Every donation, whether big or small, empowers another family to parent with confidence and lead with grace. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a second to rate the show or share this episode with a friend. We’re so grateful if you do!
Guest Bio:
Josh and Rachel are a married duo from Central Minnesota. They have been married for 15 years and have three kids, one dog, a bunny, and a bird. After becoming CF Certified Parent Coaches, they launched The Freedom Center MN, a mental health practice in Willmar, MN.
Stop Power-Struggle Parenting
Aug 12, 2024
Three dads and parent coaches talk about power struggles and how to break the patterns of judgment and defensiveness that get us stuck in power struggles with our kids. Chad Hayenga, Jim Jackson, and Alan Thetford team up to discuss how you can shift from a mindset of control to one of grace and teamwork. Jim shares a personal story about realizing he was a "power-hungry dad,” and the group roleplays how you could shift away from power-struggle parenting in a common interaction about screens and chores.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Ep 173 - "Become the Self-Aware Parent You Want to Be"
The Power of Questions online course
Quick Guide for Parenting cards
Acts 1:8
Colossians 1:9-14
Proverbs 15:1
Ephesians 6:4
Ephesians 3:17-19
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Help others find our podcast–take a moment to rate the show!
Guest Bio:
Jim Jackson and his wife Lynne co-founded Connected Families in 2002 when they were becoming increasingly dissatisfied with the parenting resources available to them as young parents. In addition to raising his three children, Jim has experience working with high-risk teens, parent coaching, and leading parenting workshops.
Alan Thetford and his wife Corrie have four children. They are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches and instructors for CF coaches-in-training. They are passionate about multiplying the gospel by helping families transform power struggles and conflicts into opportunities for gospel messages. You can learn more about them on the podcast they host, “Building Wise Families.” or on their website.
How to Stop Arguing With Your Child With One Question
Aug 05, 2024
What if you could stop arguments before they started? If you're curious about how to stop arguing with your child, you'll want to listen to this podcast.
Stacy Bellward and Sara Paine are passionate that wise questions can stop you from arguing with your child. After all, Stacy even co-authored an online course on it. Today, they discuss one game-changer question in particular and share how this question can transform parent-child interactions by fostering curiosity, empathy, and connection. They also highlight the ways questions can change brain patterns. Through role-plays, they demonstrate how this approach can work with kids of any age, showing how it can diffuse tension and promote cooperation in everyday situations.
Mentioned in this podcast:
4 Types of Wisdom Growing Questions - FREE PDF
Power of Questions online course
Matthew 20:32
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to share this episode with a friend or leave a review on your favorite listening platform.
Guest Bio:
Sara Paine is a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach and has worked with kids of varying backgrounds for over 15 years. She is a credentialed teacher and a certified wellness coach. As a mom of 3 kids through both birth and adoption, it is her pleasure to tackle the challenges faced by families with young, sensitive, and intense kids. You can find out more about parent coaching with Sara here.
What’s Your Story? Join the Week of Sharing
Jul 29, 2024
This week, we chat with Joel and Mindy Bolitho, an Australian couple who’ve experienced transformation through the Framework. They talk about significant moments in their journey and how they spread the word about Connected Families in their community. Connected Families’ Director of Development, Adel Irwin, also joins the conversation to highlight the upcoming Week of Sharing (August 1-7) and how you can get involved.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Text the keyword “parenting” to 50155 to give to Connected Families
Become a Volunteer Advocate to spread the word about Connected Families during the Week of Sharing August 1-7
How has Connected Families impacted your family? Share your story here.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Guest Bio:
Joel and Mindy Bolitho live in Australia with their two wonderful daughters, who are in primary school and high school. Mindy recently earned her BS and works as a counselor in the drug and alcohol field, while Joel works as a Disability Support Worker. They also breed miniature schnauzers and have 10 chooks, which keep them busy and delightfully entertained.
Perhaps your child always sits politely at the table and eats their Brussels sprouts, but for the rest of us, especially with a food-sensitive child or two, food struggles in families are real.
Today we talk to Emily Meade, RD, LD, a dietitian who wants to help us recapture some of the connection and joy that can happen in the kitchen and around the table. Emily discusses the importance of teaching children that their bodies are uniquely created by God, and she shares strategies for encouraging kids to try new foods without pressure. She also gives plenty of practical tips for meal planning and involving children in food prep to grow connection, wisdom, and life skills in the kitchen.
Mentioned in this podcast:
FREE Energy Bites recipe you can make with your kids
Healthy Rhythms mini course - Register today!
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation to Connected Families fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Help other parents find our podcast by leaving a quick review on your favorite listening platform.
Guest Bio:
Emily Meade is a wife and mama to three amazing kids, ages 6, 4, and 1-year-old. In addition to being home raising her children, Emily is also able to stay in practice as a Registered Dietitian doing one-on-one nutrition coaching part-time with a company called The Kôr Method. Emily enjoys cooking, gardening, staying active, serving at church, and spending time with her family.
How the Happiness Trifecta Might Transform Chores
Jul 15, 2024
What if chores weren't a constant struggle in your household? Join Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches Marni Love and Corrie Thetford as they discuss the Happiness Trifecta and how it can transform the way chores are done at your house. The Happiness Trifecta is a group of brain chemicals you can tap into to make chores more enjoyable for your kids. Corrie, Marni, and our host, Stacy Bellward, share many stories about being playful and working as a team to boost these chemicals in our kids' brains. They also highlight the need to understand each child's unique challenges and the importance of celebrating a job well done.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Healthy Rhythms for Daily Life mini-course
How Can I Identify Anxiety in My Child? | Ep. 99
Advocating for Your Sensitive or Neurodiverse Child | Ep. 123
Help! Homeschooling Is Overwhelming | Ep 93
Empowering Your Differently Wired Child | Ep 124
Ephesians 2:10
Colossians 3:23-24
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Marni Love is a former public school teacher who has been a home educator for 14 years. She is a Homeschool Mentor, a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach, and an instructor for CF coaches-in-training. Marni enjoys spending time with her husband, Eric, and their three sons in the beautiful mountains and beaches of Northern California. You can connect with her through her website, marnilove.com.
Corrie Thetford and her husband Alan have four children and are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches as well as instructors for CF coaches-in-training. They are passionate about multiplying the gospel by helping families transform power struggles and conflicts into opportunities for gospel messages. You can find out more about them at buildingwisefamilies.com.
Screen Time and Kids: How to Say YES More Often, While Kids Have LESS Screen Time
Jul 08, 2024
If you're struggling with screens and boundary setting with your kids, tune into this interview with Brittany and Kevin Hoffman. Their home has transformed as they’ve learned to ask questions, listen, and point to the bigger YES. If you're not sure what it means to point to the bigger YES, this episode is for you.
Kevin and Brittany share how the Healthy Rhythms course shaped their approach to managing screen time for their five children and the ways they adjusted their own screen habits as a result. They also chat about how they use family meetings to explore the “bigger yes” with their kids. Kevin and Brittany acknowledge that managing screen time is an ongoing process that keeps evolving as kids get older, but their guiding principles stay the same.
Mentioned in this podcast:
FREE Outdoor Activities PDF
Healthy Rhythms mini-course
Connected Families Week of Sharing - Find out how you can get involved!
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review and help other parents find the Connected Families Podcast!
Guest Bio:
Kevin and Brittany met in Vacation Bible School when they were three years old, started dating at fifteen, and have been married for thirteen years. They have five children (ages 10, 10, 8, 6, and 2), one of whom joined their family through foster care. Kevin is a trial attorney, and Brittany finds daily uses for her Master of Education while homeschooling. They are natives of New Jersey by birth and have been permanently transplanted to Virginia Beach, Virginia, where they attend Trinity Church. Connected Families has been a significant influence on their ever-evolving journey through parenting, which they define as the mission field of making disciples at home.
How to Be a Great Grandparent to your Grandkids (and Their Parents!)
Jun 24, 2024
Two grandmothers, Dijea Young and Cindy Stonestreet (who also happen to be Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) chat about the role of play in grandparenting and how they're learning to be great grandmothers. Cindy and Dijea share personal stories about respecting their adult children's parenting decisions and finding common ground, even in challenging relationships. They emphasize the power of intentional, joyful play in communicating love to their grandchildren and share examples of coaching grandchildren through conflicts. If you know a grandparent who would love to build more connection with their children and grandchildren, consider sharing this conversation with them.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Parenting Reminders Bundle
Deuteronomy 4:9
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Dijea Young is a teacher, mother of eight, and grandma. For over 35 years, she has served children and families in a variety of roles. Now as a Certified Parent Coach, she combines her professional training and personal experience to help parents and grandparents nurture relationships across generations. For more information about Dijea or her services, visit www.Room4HopeCoaching.com or email Room4HopeCoaching@gmail.com
Cindy Stonestreet, a grandmother of five, ages 3-8, has been involved with Connected Families for five years. As a result of seeking a Christ-centered and better way to discipline, she took the Discipline that Connects course, followed by parent coaching, and is a Certified Parent Coach. Cindy and her husband, Steve, are blessed to have full days, 2-3 times a week, with their grandkids. Cindy’s desire is to continually grow, little by little, as she implements the Connected Families Framework with her children, their spouses, and her grandkids. They live in Charleston, West Virginia, where Cindy is a full-time CRNA at Women and Children’s Hospital.
Joyful Kids: What's the Secret?
Jun 17, 2024
Chris Coursey, author of 4 Habits of Raising Joy-Filled Kids, joins us to discuss why joyful kids are joyful and what you can do.
Do you feel like you’re often focused on problems and operating out of fear of what may happen? Chris explains how joy can give families the strength to navigate difficulties and overcome fear. He shares a personal story of overcoming fear-based parenting and unpacks the first habit of raising joy-filled kids: attunement. Chris emphasizes that taking care of yourself nurtures your joy and directly benefits the entire family. Listen in and learn how to grow joy in your home!
Mentioned in this podcast:
We’d love to hear from you! Send the podcast a birthday greeting.
Free PDF - Child Led Play and the Framework
4 Habits of Joy-Filled Kids book
Parenting Reminders Bundle - CF stickers, word art, and a magnet
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
For over 30 years, Chris has been developing and practicing brain-based solutions to train people, families, and communities to make relationships work. Chris started his career specializing in severe trauma and abuse and also pastored a small congregation in Michigan for several years. Chris is a published author with over ten books in print, including The Joy Switch. He co-authored his most recent book, The 4 Habits of Joy-Filled People.
Chris enjoys spending time with his wife, Jen, and their two sons, Matthew and Andrew. In addition to studying, writing, jogging, and exercising, he enjoys the outdoors and is one of the rare people who actually likes the snow in Michigan.
Website: https://thrivetoday.org/Podcast: https://thrivetoday.buzzsprout.com/The 4 Habits Books: https://thrivetoday.org/4-habits-series/
The God of Play: Joyfully Embrace the Playful Side of God With Your Kids
Jun 10, 2024
Today, we talk with Joy Wendling, Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and founder of Created to Play, about helping kids come to love God wholeheartedly. Faith can sometimes feel serious or heady, but God is also the God of play, and He created children to learn best through play. Stacy and Joy discuss the significance of modeling a joyful faith. Together, they share ideas for making God relatable through play with your kids. They emphasize how to bring God into everyday moments and ways to use scripture to gently guide and encourage your kids.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Parenting Reminder Bundle - Get Yours Today!
Podcast Episode 102, "How to Be a More Playful Parent" with Joy Wendling
Deuteronomy 6
Psalm 16:11
Zephaniah 3:17
John 10:10
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Enthusiastic. Passionate. Profound. Joy Wendling is a family pastor, writer, speaker, podcaster, certified parent coach, and founder of Created to Play. She has over 20 years of experience in children, youth, and family ministry and a Master's degree in Youth, Family, and Culture from Fuller Theological Seminary. Her idea of relaxing is gazing at the mountains from her island home with an ice-cold Diet Coke and a good book. Joy lives in the Pacific Northwest and enjoys laughing and playing with her five daughters and husband. Get to know her better at createdtoplay.com and on her Playfully Faithful Parenting podcast.
How to Play with Kids Like a Therapist Would
Jun 03, 2024
Two therapists chat about the benefits of play and how to incorporate play therapy into your family’s routine. The end goal: More connection with your child and a more regulated child. It's a win-win!
In this podcast episode, Lynne Jackson, occupational therapist and Co-Founder of Connected Families, interviews Marlee Thomson, a mental health therapist and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach. They discuss the brain science behind play and how it can develop connection and trust between you and your child. Marlee explains how you can incorporate "special playtime," highlighting how your undivided attention and delight can nurture your child’s identity. Incorporating the Connected Families Framework every step of the way, Lynne and Marlee encourage you to begin this practice with the goal of being present rather than striving for perfection.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Free PDF from Marlee
Quote from parent coach Patty Wipfler, “Feelings that are felt fully are feelings that evaporate afterward.”
Psalm 147:11
Psalm 73:21-26
“Fix your face” podcast: Ep. 174 | Want to Connect with Your Teenager?
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Marlee Thomsen is an LCSWA who lives and works as a mental health therapist and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach in Durham, NC. She is working towards becoming a Registered Play Therapist and is growing in her love for play therapy. In particular, she is passionate about teaching parents play skills and walking through the Connected Families framework with them to enhance the parent-child relationship. Additionally, she has experienced the impact of the Connected Families framework in her own family as she raises two toddler boys alongside her husband.
Stories of Transformation… from “Fixing” to Connecting
May 27, 2024
We chat with Lindsay Fauver, a mom from the Connected Families community, about her parenting journey with a child who experiences anxiety, sensory challenges, and challenging behaviors. Lindsay shares how she has gained new understanding and tools to support her child and stay calm when her daughter escalates. She also emphasizes the persistence required to implement positive changes and the role of scripture in sustaining her. If you’re feeling overwhelmed with parenting, you’ll find plenty of hope and practical ideas in this interview with a mom who's been there.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Are You Micromanaging Your Kids? Here’s How to Stop | Ep. 177
Authentic Community for Dads | Ep. 179
100 Truth Phrases PDF - a free resource
Grace & Truth for Moms online course
Connected Families Connection Questions (Campfire Questions)
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course
Parenting Coaching
Isaiah 30
James 1
Psalm 103:8
1 John 3:19
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
Your donation fuels our work. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Take a moment to rate and review!
Guest Bio:
Lindsay Fauver is a photographer by trade and a theologian at heart. She is deeply passionate about participating with the great Artist as she works to build a foundation of "belonging and becoming" with her little people, clients, and students. Lindsay loves writing, peonies, Pilates, design, earrings, and anything by the water. She longs for the day when her story of surrender is told in its fullness by the One who will permanently wipe away her tears.
How Authentic Community Can Equip Parents to Thrive
May 20, 2024
In this meaningful conversation, we talk to dads Matt Norman (author and President & CEO of Norman & Associates) and Jim Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) about their experiences with authentic, vulnerable community. Matt shares his personal journey of seeking more meaningful connections while balancing the demands of marriage, parenting, and his career. He describes the evolution of his small group, which started as a way to socialize and study but grew into a space for supportive and sensitive sharing. Jim emphasizes the power of asking questions and genuinely seeking to understand others, rather than just offering opinions or advice. Both men reflect on the positive impact their authentic community has had on their personal growth, relationships, and even their children's development.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Grace & Truth for Moms online course - register today!
Equimundo’s 2023 State of American Men survey data
Daniel 3
Galatians 6
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
We’re a listener-supported podcast. Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Don’t forget to take a moment to rate and review the podcast!
Guest Bio:
Matt Norman coaches and advises executives on how to build great people and culture. He is President & CEO of Norman & Associates, which offers custom coaching and consulting in the areas of talent strategy, personal effectiveness, planning, and goal alignment. Norman & Associates is also the largest North American provider of Dale Carnegie learning programs which help people improve how they communicate, lead, influence, and work together. He’s also the award-winning author of Four Patterns of Healthy People, and Lead with Influence: A Proven Process to Lead without Authority. Matt loves being a husband and father of three, enjoying shared activities like skiing, mountain biking, trail running, and music. You can find his articles on personal and organizational effectiveness at http://mattnorman.com.
My Co-Parent Sees Things Differently
May 13, 2024
What do you do when you disagree with your partner about how to parent? Perhaps it is even causing a rift in your family. You feel strongly about how to parent your kids but feel stuck on knowing how to encourage your co-parent to see things the way you do.
You are not alone! It is a very common struggle for many parents. Whether you are single parenting with an ex-spouse, married, or caring for grandchildren, this can be an emotionally charged topic.
Tensions over different parenting styles and philosophies can create stress in your relationship with your co-parent and affect your kids, too. You and your partner may both have good intentions, but your parenting ideals and how to implement them might be different.
In this podcast, we're going to tackle this challenging topic. Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (Co-founders of Connected Families) to discuss their experience as parents with very different personalities. You’ll discover how Jim and Lynne navigated their parenting differences, and what kept them connected in the process.
You can create an atmosphere of safety and connection for your co-parent and your children by using the Connected Families Framework, asking curious questions, focusing on your own heart, and looking for the best in each other. Your family environment can be a place where everyone is safe to learn and grow in grace and empathy for one another.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
the power of the Connected Families Framework in your relationship with your partner, or co-parent
questions you can ask your partner that invite conversation, connection, and openness instead of criticism
how to get to a nonjudgmental place where you can see your partner’s underlying strengths as a parent
offering grace and avoiding catastrophizing, knowing that God is working on behalf of your kids no matter the situation
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Framework
Discipline That Connects online course
Trash, Truth, Treasure (blog post)
Connected Families New Serenity Prayer (download)
Want to learn more?
What’s the Best Way to Handle Shared Parenting?
How to Parent Together When You’re Total Opposites
What Causes You to Micromanage Your Kids?
May 06, 2024
Listen in as we talk with Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education and Equipping) about parental anxiety and micromanagement, and how these can negatively impact your relationship with your child. Chad and Stacy (podcast host) discuss common scenarios that trigger anxiety in parents and the resulting cycle that can leave the child feeling discouraged and resentful.
The conversation is filled with practical ideas for moving out of the cycle of anxiety and into new patterns of belief and ways of relating to your child. Whether your child is about to graduate from high school, or just starting to have responsibilities of his own, you’ll find wisdom and encouragement for today in this episode.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sign up for our weekly Parenting Tips email
Grace & Truth for Moms online course
Are You Micromanaging Your Kids?
1 Peter 5:7
Philippians 4:6-8
100 Truth Phrases PDF
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting!
We are a listener-supported podcast. Donate to Connected Families today! Your donation fuels our work.
Did you find this episode helpful? Share it with a friend, or take a moment to rate and review!
Make-It-Right Consequences for Kids
Apr 29, 2024
Start teaching your kids the first steps toward reconciliation and restoration by using "make it right" consequences in their relationships. Parent coach Amy Nyvall shares personal stories illustrating how she has taught her kids to take responsibility for their actions and restore relationships when they've done something wrong. Amy emphasizes the importance of creating space for both parents and children to process emotions and think through how to resolve conflicts. Throughout the conversation, Amy and Stacy discuss the Connected Families Framework and how focusing on restoration rather than punishment helps children develop wisdom and strengthen relationships.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Episode 112: Daily Sensory Rhythms to Bring Peace to Your Home
Matthew 5:23-24
Galatians 6:1
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Got a minute? Rate and review the podcast.
We are a listener-supported podcast! Donate to Connected Families today.
Guest Bio:
Amy and her husband, Andrew, have been married for 16 years and live among the fir trees outside Portland, Oregon. They enjoy outdoor adventures as much as possible and have a blast homeschooling their three intensely creative, adventurous, and active children. In her spare time, you’ll find Amy encouraging moms and homeschoolers, learning alongside the kids, or slipping away to read from a stack of her own books. Amy is passionate about creating a family culture that equips our children to be prepared to serve the Lord in the days ahead. She is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and has personal experience and knowledge in the sensitive and intense space. You can connect with her for parent coaching at: amynyvall@gmail.com.
Principios para la crianza de una familia conectada (parte 2)
Apr 27, 2024
See Your Child’s Strengths in the Craziness | Ep. 175
Apr 22, 2024
Your kids, with all the wild moments they bring, are fearfully and wonderfully made. That means God gave them gifts and strengths. Listen to us chat with Courtney and Joe Dewey (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) about finding your child's giftings and celebrating them. They emphasize the value of self-awareness as a parent, recognizing your strengths to be a more effective parent, and helping your children identify and develop their unique gifts.
Courtney and Joe share personal stories of how they have celebrated and leveraged their family's different strengths, such as assigning chores based on each child's interests and dividing playtime according to complementary strengths. The conversation highlights the idea that families can thrive by focusing on and cultivating each family member's God-given strengths.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Free Fearfully and Wonderfully Made PDF
Connected Families Quick Guide for Parenting - New Resource!
Romans 12
StrengthsFinder Assessment
Ep 158: State of Motherhood podcast with MOPS
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Guest Bio:
Courtney is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach with over a decade of experience in coaching leaders in ministry. Her mission is to equip the body of Christ to know the gifts God has given them, develop those gifts, and utilize them to bring Him glory and make their best contribution to the Kingdom of Heaven. She combines her ministry experience with 8 years of homeschooling her four kids to help parents identify the gifts in their children and parent them in a way that sets them up to live out Ephesians 2:10 and lean into Connected Families third message of "child, you are called and capable". You can reach out to her directly at Courtney.Dewey@cru.org. She is certified in EQI, Birkman, Predictive Index, Core Clarity,
Joe is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach. He has a Bachelor's in Mechanical Engineering and has served in full-time ministry with Cru in Leader Development and Human Resources since 2010. He has been a certified life coach since 2017. These experiences and more have molded him to lead with solutions. Whether it comes to ministry or parenting, he finds clarity in the midst of complexity that provides win-win solutions.
Want to Connect With Your Teenager?
Apr 15, 2024
How can you continue to connect and maintain a relationship with your kids as they get older? You CAN connect with your teenager. If you've got teens, or will have them someday, listen to us chat with Rachel and Josh Keller about connecting to your teens.
In this podcast episode, Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches Josh and Rachel (MA, LPCC) Keller share their wealth of experience with teens and offer guidance on nurturing relationships with older kids. They discuss three key ways to rally around your teens: remember, listen, and "yift" (being flexible and adaptable to meet teens where they are emotionally, even if it means letting go of your own agenda).
Together, Josh and Rachel explore teen brain development as well as the importance of active listening. Understanding these things will help parents respond with more patience and less shame. They encourage parents to practice being "unphased listeners" by preparing for potentially shocking statements from their teens. Throughout the conversation, Josh and Rachel offer practical insights, examples, and encouragement to parents, reminding them that they are not alone in the challenges of parenting teens.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families resources in Spanish
Certified Parent Coaches from around the globe!
Slow, low, listen tool
NEW! Connected Families Quick Guide for Parenting Cards
Power of Questions online course
Has this conversation encouraged you? Take a moment to share it with a friend or rate and review it on your favorite platform.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Become the Self-Aware Parent You Want to Be
Apr 08, 2024
Listen in as Chad Hayenga, Jim Jackson, and Alan Thetford talk about being safe for their kids.
Today’s podcast is extra-special! We have three dads who unpack the importance of being an emotionally safe parent, particularly focusing on the role of fathers. Our guest host, Chad Hayenga (Director of Education and Equipping), is joined by Jim Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Alan Thetford (Certified Connected Families Parent Coach and Parent Coach Instructor), who share their personal experience and discuss the biblical foundations of emotional safety. Through their insight, we know you’ll be encouraged to grow safety and connection through everyday interactions in your home.
Mentioned in this podcast:
New! Connected Families Quick Guide for Parenting
Calming Strategies for Parents PDF
50 Calming Activities for Kids
You Are Safe with Me Covenant PDF
1 Thessalonians 2
Philippians 4
James 1:19-20
Matthew 12:34
Has this conversation encouraged you? Take a moment to share this podcast with a friend, or rate and review it on your favorite platform.
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Guest Bio:
Jim Jackson and his wife Lynne co-founded Connected Families in 2002 after becoming increasingly dissatisfied with the parenting resources available to young parents. In addition to raising his own three (now adult) children, Jim has experience working with high-risk teens, parent coaching, and leading parenting workshops.
Alan Thetford and his wife Corrie have four children and are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches as well as instructors for CF coaches-in-training. They are passionate about multiplying the gospel by helping families transform power struggles and conflicts into opportunities for gospel messages. You can learn more about them on the podcast they host, “Building Wise Families.”Website http://www.buildingwisefamilies.com/CFCoachingPodcast https://buildingwisefamilies.com/podcast/
Max Lucado: Just In Case You Ever Feel Alone
Mar 25, 2024
Join us for a heartfelt conversation with Max Lucado about loneliness and his new children’s book, Just in Case You Ever Feel Alone.
Feelings of isolation and loneliness are increasingly common, and the need for meaningful connection and reassurance is becoming more pressing than ever. In our recent conversation with pastor and author Max Lucado, we shared that 61% of Americans and an overwhelming 80% of those under 18 report experiences of loneliness. This growing epidemic of feeling isolated not only affects our mental health but also touches our spiritual well-being.
In the midst of this reality, in his gentle style, Max offers insights into the nature of loneliness and asks us to consider it from a spiritual perspective. He emphasizes the value of equipping young children with the vocabulary to express this complex emotion. His latest children's book, Just in Case You Ever Feel Alone, helps children better understand that loneliness is a shared human experience.
Pastor Max encourages people experiencing loneliness to pray using scripture, and he highlights the promises of Hebrews 13:5, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you," and Matthew 28:20, "And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age." These biblical assurances are not just words but anchors for the soul that offer stability and hope.
To wrap up the conversation, Pastor Max read a passage from his book for our listeners. Through the tender narrative, his words aim to reassure young readers of the comforting presence of their parents and caregivers, as well as God, who is always with them. His words serve as a gentle reminder that no matter how isolated we may feel, we are all continually held in God’s care.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Enter to win Max’s new book and a stuffed bear
Bridge the Gap! Support the work of Connected Families to equip parents today.
Just in Case You Ever Feel Alone by Max Lucado
Matthew 28:20
Hebrews 13:5
"Must-Know Loneliness Statistics"
"Loneliness Matters: A Theoretical and Empirical Review of Consequences and Mechanisms"
Got a minute? Rate and review our podcast on your favorite platform!
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Guest Bio:
Max Lucado is known for combining poetic storytelling and homespun humor withthe heart of a pastor. His trade books all begin as sermon series at Oak Hills Church,and his sermons all start with Max asking himself this question: “What can I say onSunday that will still matter on Monday?” He’s been dubbed “America’s Pastor” byChristianity Today, “The Best Preacher in America” by Reader’s Digest, and the “TedLasso of Pastors” by the Dallas Morning News. Max Lucado has penned more than 40works of adult nonfiction, standing alongside dozens and dozens of bestsellingchildren's books, gift books, Bible studies, commentaries, and collections. His bookshave been published in 56 languages worldwide and regularly appear on bestsellerlists, including The New York Times, Publishers Weekly, and USA Today. He has morethan 150 million products in print published in 56 languages worldwide. Learn more atMaxLucado.com.
Holy Week Activities to Nurture Faith in Kids of All Ages
Mar 18, 2024
In this episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Katie Wetsell (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) offer insights on how to engage children in the Easter story, emphasizing the Resurrection's significance through traditions and conversation. They provide age-appropriate scripts for explaining Jesus' sacrifice and suggest inclusive activities like the Resurrection Sunday Rock Hunt to make the concepts of sin and redemption tangible for kids. The key message is that Easter traditions, when intertwined with faith, can deepen everyone’s understanding and foster a sense of community and belonging.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Resurrection Sunday Rock Hunt Guide - Free, downloadable PDF provides a step-by-step guide to a meaningful family activity that helps children understand the significance of Easter.
John 14:1-3
Romans 3:23
Previous episodes featuring Certified Connected Families Parent Coach, Katie Wetsell
Ep 165 | Tame Your Temper: Calming Strategies for Parents
Ep 99 | How Can I Identify Anxiety in My Child?
Ep 124 | Empowering Your Differently Wired Child
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Bridge the Gap! Donate to Connected Families by March 31st to make a meaningful impact for families in the coming year!
Guest Bio:
Katie Wetsell is the Connected Families online course moderator. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, pediatric nurse, and mom of four through birth and adoption. She is passionate about encouraging and empowering parents to love their families with confidence and connection. Building on her bedside experience, she has also been trained in SPACE treatment (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) to help parents support their children in overcoming anxiety. Her website is www.parentwithhope.org, and you can find her on social media @parentwithhopecoach.
Bonus: Supporting Grieving Families in Your Community
Mar 12, 2024
Join us for this special bonus episode where Stacy invites community members and ministry leaders to explore the delicate and important topic of supporting children and families in times of grief. Stacy is joined by Cindy Wilson, Connected Families Partnership Program Manager, and Stacey Rodenbeck, who shares her personal experience with grief. Together, they offer practical advice and compassionate insights to help ministry leaders (and everyone else) approach these difficult situations with confidence and care.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Ep 169 | How to Navigate Grief in Children
Partnership Program - Sign up for a Discovery Session to find out more!
My Child's Loved One Died; What Should I Do Now?
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Guest Bio:
Cindy Wilson, PhD., CFLE, is a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach and a Certified Family Life Educator with 20+ years in ministry and academia. She helps churches and other organizations integrate the Connected Families Framework into their communities. Cindy lives in Florida with her husband of 31 years. They have three adult children, one son-in-law, one grandson, and a farm full of animals. Cindy’s specialties include leading parenting workshops on the Connected Families Framework and other topics, training children’s ministry volunteers, helping churches integrate trauma-informed practices into their ministries, and organizing church-based foster care ministries. You can find out more at http://www.familylifesolutions.org.
Stacey Rodenbeck is the widowed mother of Susan (almost 5) and Chris (3.5). The Rodenbecks live in Central Arkansas, where Stacey is employed as an Associate Professor of Biology at Harding University. Since the death of her husband in 2020, Stacey has focused on developing a robust relationship with her children that positions the three of them to operate as a team. They enjoy cooking and baking together as a family, reading aloud, and hiking, and they have recently delved into playing board games together. (Candyland is the family favorite right now!) Stacey is thankful to God for the new mercies of each new morning as she seeks to guide her children and fully embrace the people God created them to be.
How to Navigate Grief in Children
Mar 11, 2024
Children experience grief in all different forms. If you're walking through grief with your kids, tune in to this grace-filled chat with our guest, Stacey Rodenbeck. Stacey, a widowed mother of two young children, shares her personal experience of grief and how she has used the Connected Families Framework to navigate parenting while grieving. The conversation covers the unique circumstances of parenting grieving children, the importance of safety and connection, and the role of coaching and accountability in parenting. Stacey’s story and insights provide valuable guidance for parents who are navigating grief while raising their children.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Isaiah 43:1-3
Blog post: My Child’s Loved One Died; What Do I Do Now?
Transform Bedtime Struggles Into Nighttime Snuggles ebook
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Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Bridge the Gap! Donate to Connected Families by March 31st to make a meaningful impact for families in the coming year!
Guest Bio:
Stacey Rodenbeck is the widowed mother of Susan (almost 5) and Chris (3.5). The Rodenbecks live in Central Arkansas, where Stacey is employed as an Associate Professor of Biology at Harding University. Since the death of her husband in 2020, Stacey has focused on developing a robust relationship with her children that positions the three of them to operate as a team. They enjoy cooking and baking together as a family, reading aloud, and hiking, and they have recently delved into playing board games together. (Candyland is the family favorite right now!) Stacey is thankful to God for the new mercies of each new morning as she seeks to guide her children and fully embrace the people God created them to be.
Questions & Doubts: When Your Child’s Faith Is Uncertain
Mar 04, 2024
If your child has serious doubts or has walked away from their faith, it can be scary. Together with parent coaches Bonnie Williams and Chad Hayenga, we explore parenting through a child’s spiritual doubts or unbelief. Chad and Bonnie share the importance of fostering open dialogue through thoughtful questions and building a foundation of connection, emotional safety, and unconditional love. Tune in to this heartfelt discussion to equip yourself with the knowledge and encouragement needed to support your child's faith journey, acknowledging that their doubts or unbelief can be an essential part of developing a resilient and personal faith.
(Note: The use of “they/them” language is related to privacy, not identity.)
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Partnership Program
Parent Coach Certification Program
Power of Questions online course
Ephesians 3:18-19
Luke 15:17
Bridge the Gap - Donate to support Connected Families today!
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Guest Bio:
Bonnie Williams has a Master of Education in Special Education and is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach. She is a wife and the mother of 3 young adults. Bonnie has supported students with learning and behavior challenges for over 25 years, specializing in working with parents with children ages 3 to 15. Helping families apply the Connected Families Framework is what Bonnie is passionate about. By doing this they can learn new strategies to grow in wisdom and help lead them in having peaceful, grace-filled homes. You can reach her by email at newpathways65@gmail.com.
Kids’ Arguments: Establish Peace with 4 Steps
Feb 26, 2024
If your kids' bickering ever drives you bonkers, you'll want to hear this fresh perspective with our guest and certified parent coach, Megan Thorp. Stacy and Megan unpack the Connected Families’ approach to transform kids’ arguments into opportunities to build lifelong skills. You’ll learn the four-step process to help bring peace to your home and guide your kids toward true reconciliation.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Calming for Parents Free PDF
Calming for Kids Free PDF
Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches
The Peace Process Diagram
Ep 140 | Restoring Relationships: Empowering Kids to Want to Reconcile and Heal
Ep 110 | Why "Calm Down!" Doesn't Work
Sibling Conflict online course
Power of Questions online course
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Make a donation to Connected Families today.
Guest Bio:
Megan is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach as well as an instructor for coaches in training. She and her husband have been married for 18 years and have 3 kids. Megan loves to come alongside parents to help them gain confidence and equip them to lead their families. She is passionate about parents creating an environment in their home where everyone feels valued and connected and equipping parents with skills to build a relationship with their kids that will last long after they leave home. Seeing misbehavior and especially sibling conflict as a golden opportunity to show Christ’s love and disciple her kids has been a game changer for her in her parenting. You can connect with her for coaching at meganlthorp@gmail.com.
Supporting Your Teen with Empathy and Connection
Feb 12, 2024
Dive into the trials and triumphs of parenting teens with CF Certified Parent Coaches, Katie Wetsell and Julia Rupp and our host, Stacy Bellward. They examine teen anxiety, independence, and the art of calm communication. They also unpack ways to stay available and connected through teen struggles, especially with a sensitive or intense child. We know this conversation will encourage you to parent your teens with wisdom and hope. (Note: Stories are shared with permission from their teens, and the use of "they/them" language is related to privacy, not identity.)
Mentioned in this podcast:
Carlie Dorsey, OT and Owner of Motorvate Kids in Murrell's Inlet, SC
Calming Strategies For Parents PDF
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - 30% off!
Ep 153: A Circle Of Support: What Can a Mentor Do for a Child?
Ephesians 6:4
Romans 5:8
Research cited by Katie Wetsell:
When is Parental Monitoring Effective?
Parenting Styles or Practices? Parenting, Sympathy, and Prosocial Behaviors Among Adolescents
The role of relatedness: Applying a developmental-relational view of compassion in adolescence
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Did you find this episode helpful? Share it with a friend! Or take a minute to rate and review our show.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Guest Bio:
Julia Rupp is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and lives in South Carolina with her husband and two children. They experienced a significant breakthrough in their parenting while partnering with a Connected Families coach and utilizing the parenting Framework. Because of the incredible impact that Connected Families made in their lives, Julia now desires to walk alongside other families and equip them with perspective and tools so that they might experience that same change and restored hope. Whether you are struggling with toddler meltdowns or teenage rebellion, she would love to encourage you. You can find her at Always Hope Parent Coaching.
Katie Wetsell is the Connected Families online course moderator. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, pediatric nurse, and mom of four through birth and adoption. She is passionate about encouraging and empowering parents to love their families with confidence and connection. Building on her bedside experience, she has also been trained in SPACE treatment (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) to help parents support their children in overcoming anxiety. Her website is www.parentwithhope.org.
Tame Your Temper: Calming Strategies for Parents
Feb 05, 2024
Listen in as Stacy talks with Julia Rupp and Katie Wetsell (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) about strategies you can use to calm yourself in emotionally charged situations with your kids. Whether you’ve already blown it and need to repair, or you’re trying to proactively remain calm, this conversation offers practical ideas to pause and reset so you can parent with wisdom and grace. The way we show up matters so much, so we’re offering a FREE PDF with all 14 calming strategies you can post as a visual reminder for when you need it most.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Calming Strategies For Parents PDF
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - 30% off!
Galatians 6:9
Hebrews 12
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Did you find this episode helpful? Share it with a friend! Or take a minute to rate and review our show.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Guest bio:
Julia Rupp is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and lives in South Carolina with her husband and two children. They experienced a significant breakthrough in their parenting while partnering with a Connected Families coach and utilizing the parenting Framework. Because of the incredible impact that Connected Families made in their lives, Julia now desires to walk alongside other families and equip them with perspective and tools so that they might experience that same change and restored hope. Whether you are struggling with toddler meltdowns or teenage rebellion, she would love to encourage you. You can find her at Always Hope Parent Coaching.
Katie Wetsell is the Connected Families online course moderator. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, pediatric nurse, and mom of four through birth and adoption. She is passionate about encouraging and empowering parents to love their families with confidence and connection. Building on her bedside experience, she has also been trained in SPACE treatment (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) to help parents support their children in overcoming anxiety. Her website is www.parentwithhope.org.
3 Principles to Help Your Child Calm and Regulate
Jan 29, 2024
In this episode on calming for kids, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) talk with Stacy about what role parents play in helping their kids calm down. This conversation especially has sensitive or intense kids in mind, and the principles shared are paired with practical examples and stories from parents who’ve tested the ideas. Plus, we’ve got a free PDF for you: 50 Calming Activities (with ideas for engaging each of the senses).
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - 30% off!
50 Calming Activities PDF
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Did you find this episode helpful? Share it with a friend, and leave us a review!
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Hope & Healing for Your Sensitive or Intense Child
Jan 22, 2024
Listen in as Stacy chats with parent coaches Jarrett & Luisa Wendt about the parenting course that has equipped them to understand and help their sensitive children.
In today’s episode, Jarrett & Luisa Wendt (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) talk with our host, Stacy Bellward, about the daily meltdowns, sleep issues, stress, and discouragement their family has experienced. Then, they share how they found hope and healing through the Sensitive & Intense Kids online course. Jarrett & Luisa discuss the tools they’ve learned to help their kids regulate and how they’re sustaining positive progress. If you have a sensitive or intense child, you’ll be encouraged by their story and inspired by their persistence to build a safe, connected family with Christ as the foundation.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - 30% off!
Rocks in the Backpack video
Rocks in the Backpack PDF
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Guest Bio:
Jarrett and Luisa Wendt are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches. They have a beautiful family of six children, three in Heaven and three on Earth. Two of their precious children were born into their family through adoption. During a very challenging season, Connected Families led them (and continues to lead them) toward hope, grace, and truth. Together, they have a ministry called Built on Rock Parent Coaching which was born out of the deep desire to pass on that same hope, grace, and truth to as many families as God leads them to! Luisa was joyfully promoted to becoming a stay-at-home Mom after more than a decade of teaching music in the classroom, while Jarrett serves the church in theology and pastoral ministry. For more about their story, ministry, and cute photos, head to their website: www.builtonrockparentcoaching.org
Sensitive or Intense Child? Your Questions Answered!
Jan 15, 2024
In today’s episode, parent coaches Lynne Jackson and Lydia Rex answer questions from parents about sensitive and intense kids.
We’re excited to share another Q & A conversation with you today. The new questions came straight from parents in the CF community, and you’ll likely relate to the scenarios. Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) offer answers and suggestions based on their combined experiences in occupational therapy, nursing, coaching, and parenting their own sensitive and intense kids. You’ll gain insight into your child and find realistic suggestions for challenging situations. And, as always, you’ll receive God’s grace and truth for you and your child.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - 30% off!
Rocks in the Backpack PDF
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Moving From Discouragement to Freedom | Ep. 161
Jan 08, 2024
Listen as parent coach Lydia Rex shares about building hope and strength for parenting when you’re feeling discouraged.
In this episode, Stacy and Lydia discuss current factors that contribute to overwhelm in parents. Lydia goes on to offer strategies that can help you overcome challenges and experience freedom on difficult days or in the midst of trying seasons. We know you’ll find hope and practical ideas as she shares relatable parenting moments from her life as a mom and parent coach.
Today’s conversation is based on a workshop given at a recent Connected Families Parent Summit hosted in our home state of Minnesota. In the next few months, we’ll share content from all of the Parent Summit workshops, so stay tuned!
Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting.
Your donation fuels our work! Donate to Connected Families today.
Mentioned in this podcast:
FREE downloadable and printable PDF self-coaching worksheet to help you move from discouragement to freedom.
Ep 158 with Mandy Arioto
And the Top Podcast of 2023 is...
Jan 01, 2024
Have you ever been perplexed by the intensity of your child's big emotions or the frequency of their anger? You really want to help your child! But it can feel confusing and overwhelming, and you may even unintentionally spark more anger. It's likely that your child's anger is protecting some softer emotions, such as feeling anxious, alone, or discouraged. Listen to this podcast to gain insight and practical tools to help your child understand and work through their anger!
In this podcast, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder and Occupational Therapist) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and RN) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about anger and anxiety in children. Drawing on their experience supporting families, Lynne and Lydia share how you can look beneath your child’s anger to get out of a stress cycle and into a healing pattern.
Other popular Connected Families podcasts in 2023
Episode 121: Teaching Kids the Framework
In this podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss ways parents can model and teach each principle of the Framework: Foundation, Connect, Coach, Correct. This podcast includes a downloadable, 5-session mini curriculum developed by Jim and Lynne to help teach the Framework to children in interactive and hands-on ways.
Episode 122: How To Know If Your Child Needs a Diagnosis or Extra Support
All children go through more challenging developmental seasons, but some children are wired differently altogether, also known as neurodiverse. These kids often benefit from the understanding and support of professionals. In this episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) are joined by Mandy Cuda, MD. Listen in on a profound conversation to help parents navigate the choice to seek a diagnosis or support for a struggling child.
Episode 123: Advocating for Your Sensitive or Neurodiverse Child
Communicating with teachers, coaches, and other adults about how to support your sensitive or neurodiverse child may feel difficult to navigate, but thankfully, other parents have also walked that journey and have some practical wisdom to share. In this podcast, Marni Love (former public school teacher, home educator, and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) and Taylor Irby (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share their experiences about advocating for a sensitive child. Taylor and Marni offer practical ideas to empower you so your child can receive the support they need in any environment.
Episode 124: Empowering Your Differently Wired Child
Do you have a child who is wired differently? You’ve probably felt frustrated or discouraged at times about how to support your child through daily routines or going to school. Knowing what your child needs and offering that at the right time may be challenging. In this podcast episode, Katie Wetsell and Corrie Thetford (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about empowering your uniquely and wonderfully wired child.
BONUS: Connected Families Future Plus A Story of Transformation
Dec 22, 2023
Listen as we wrap up 2023 with Jim Jackson and Anna Braasch chatting about Connected Families' plans for 2024. Plus, Stacey Rodenbeck shares about the hope she’s found through the Framework.
In today’s bonus episode, Jim Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Anna Braasch (Connected Families Executive Director) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share about Connected Families’ year-end goals and the plans for 2024. Stacy also interviews Stacey Rodenbeck, a mom from the Connected Families community, about her transformational journey with the Framework.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Make Change today with a year-end gift to Connected Families
Ep 154 | Stories of Transformation…One Mom’s Journey
Guest Bio:
Stacey Rodenbeck is the widowed mother of Susan (almost 5) and Chris (3.5). The Rodenbecks live in Central Arkansas, where Stacey is employed as an Associate Professor of Biology at Harding University. Since the death of her husband in 2020, Stacey has focused on developing a robust relationship with her children that positions the three of them to operate as a team. They enjoy cooking and baking together as a family, reading aloud, and hiking, and they have recently delved into playing board games together. (Candyland is the family favorite right now!) Stacey is thankful to God for the new mercies of each new morning as she seeks to guide her children and fully embrace the people God created them to be.
Refresh Your Parenting with Prayer
Dec 18, 2023
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Katie Johnson talks with Stacy about how prayer can help transform your parenting.
Have you ever wished you could deepen your prayer life? Or does it feel difficult to find time for meaningful prayer in your day-to-day life with kids? In this episode, Katie Johnson (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) and Stacy Bellward, podcast host, explore prayer from a fresh, practical perspective. Katie shares ideas for prayer that are rooted in scripture and easy for parents to implement.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
Ways to pray using scripture that are accessible at any moment with whatever time you have
How to use the phrases “Thank you,” “Yes,” and “Help” to create prayers from Bible passages
How Scripture can act as a guardrail for your prayers when you are desperate and hurting
Ideas to model prayer for your kids and grow their joy-filled connection with God
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Free PDF - Refresh Your Parenting With Prayer (see below)
Psalms Journal
Psalm 84:11
James 1:17
Proverbs 18:10
Episode 139: How To Help Siblings Stop Fighting All the Time
Guest Bio:
Katie Johnson is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and lives in Madison, WI, with her family. She worked for many years in education and is now beginning the homeschool journey with her 3 young children. She received her M.Ed. from Valparaiso University and currently serves on the board of Safe Families, Dane County. You can find out more about Katie on our Coaching page.
Stories of Transformation…Finding Hope For Change
Dec 11, 2023
Listen as Stacy chats with two families about the grace-filled changes they’ve experienced through the Connected Families Framework.
Whether it’s your child’s defiant attitude or your angry reaction, your family likely has patterns that you’d like to change. Changing default responses like these isn’t easy, but it is possible. In today’s conversation, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) interviews Katrina Baros and Kate Bakker, two moms from the Connected Families community. These moms candidly share how they began to shift the dynamics in their homes and what they’ve learned along the way.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
How two families began to shift the challenging patterns they experienced
The significance of asking, “What’s going on in me?”
That “do-overs” are for kids and parents too!
Connected Families resources that can support your parenting and help you instigate change in your family
How your support can help other families make change
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Parent Coaching
The Power of Questions online course
Sibling Conflict online course
Make a donation today to support transformation in families
Guest Bio:
Katrina Baros and her husband live in Seattle, WA, with their four sons, ages 5-13. Their family enjoys road-tripping, playing family football games in the yard, and playing board games, especially if snacks are involved.
Kate Bakker and her husband are from Austin, TX. They have two biological children, ages 4 & 6, and a 5-month-old foster son. Their family loves to explore the local hiking trails and enjoy family movie nights.
What Mom Needs: An Exciting Chat with the CEO of MOPS Int’l
Dec 04, 2023
Listen as we talk with Mandy Arioto about what moms need today based on a new study by the Barna Group.
Moms are powerful influencers in their families and communities, yet they often feel exhausted and alone. In this episode, Mandy Arioto, President & CEO of MOPS International, reflects with Stacy Bellward (podcast host) on the Motherhood Today study. She offers insights from the study to help moms build resilience and move from surviving to thriving.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
Why Moms have the strongest impact on nearly every aspect of their family’s life, yet often feel that they’re not making a meaningful contribution to the world
Reflection questions to help you move past “I should do it all” and “I want to be a perfect mom”
That moms with Christian faith have significantly less anxiety about important decisions and less uncertainty about the future than moms who do not have Christian faith
The best way to improve your emotional and spiritual life is to have a confidant aside from your spouse
It’s ok to lower your expectations and have more fun!
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Make a year-end gift to Connected Families
Visit Growthechurch.co for a copy of the Motherhood Today study and information about all that Mandy’s doing at Mom Co.
Guest Bio:
Mandy Arioto is the President and CEO of MOPS International and is widely known for her unique takes on evangelism, parenting, and cultural issues. Through MOPS, which every year mobilizes millions of women, and partners with tens of thousands of churches, Mandy serves as the voice of one of the most influential outreach organizations in the U.S. and around the world. Mandy has been featured on MSN, FOX, CBS, and hundreds of radio, TV, and print publications. She is the author of three books, the most recent being Have More Fun: How to be Remarkable, Stop Feeling Stuck and Start Enjoying Life. She is an avid rock climber and adventurer and regularly has harrowing stories to tell about her most recent ascent. Mandy and her husband, Joe, live in Denver, Colorado, with their three awesome kids. You can find out more about MOPS and Mom Co. at:
Website: https://growthechurch.co; https://www.mops.org/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mops_international/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MOPS.Int/
A Parenting Framework for Adoption and Fostering? Yes!
Nov 27, 2023
Listen in as Lynn Beckett, Chad Hayenga, and Stacy unpack a grace-filled lens for navigating parenting and discipline in adoptive and foster care families. These creative and compassionate ideas can benefit any parent!
When families grow through adoption or foster care, they often experience unique and sometimes challenging circumstances. Today’s conversation highlights ways the Connected Families Framework can guide these families toward deeper connection, secure attachment, and attuned correction. Our guest, Lynn Beckett, is a TBRI® Certified, licensed social worker and serves as the Program Manager and a parent coach at Lifeline Children’s Services. She joins Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education & Equipping) and Stacy Bellward (podcast host and adoptive mom) to share practical ideas and insights for each level of the Connected Families Framework.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
How your attachment style can influence how you view and respond to your child’s behavior, and how your child’s attachment style affects their behavior as well
How the Connected Families Framework can deepen your child’s sense of felt safety
Ways to strengthen your attachment with a child who is avoidant or suspicious
How you can help heal your child’s negative identity messages from the past through the ABCs of affirmation
Ways you may need to adjust discipline and correction as you respond to a child who has experienced trauma
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
The Connected Families Framework
Episode 101: Does Attachment Style Matter?
Childhood Wounds: What They Are and How to Free Your Parenting of Them
Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches
Guest Bio:
Lynn Beckett has worked in the area of foster care and adoption since her graduation fromthe University of Georgia in 1981. She joined Lifeline staff in 1989. Her role atLifeline has included preparing and equipping families for foster care and adoptionand supporting them in the post-placement phase of their journey. She became aTBRI® Practitioner in 2016 and a Certified Parent Coach through ConnectedFamilies in 2021. While providing post-placement services to adoptive and fosterfamilies, she developed the parent coaching program for Lifeline. Lynn iscommitted to the care of vulnerable children and to helping caregivers bring thesechildren to a place of healing. Lynn is married to Brian, and they live in Birmingham,Alabama. They have two daughters, two sons-in-law, and three grandchildren. Lynnhas found that being a grandparent is the best “do over” ever.
Navigating Family Gatherings
Nov 20, 2023
With the holidays fast approaching, we are pulling a classic podcast from the archives where Chad Hayenga joins Stacy Bellward to discuss some ideas for navigating family gatherings. Enjoy!
Are you looking forward to celebrating holidays with family but dreading unsolicited advice from well-meaning relatives? You are not alone. Changes in your daily routines, travel, lack of sleep, and large gatherings set the stage for parenting challenges. Sometimes these difficult situations may be scrutinized by other adults in your family. This may lead to comments or questions that don’t feel supportive. Navigating family gatherings can be tricky!
On today’s podcast, Chad Hayenga (Director of Education & Equipping) and Jenna Williams (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about navigating the holidays with relatives. Specifically, how you can respond when grandparents or other family members criticize you (or your children). Role-playing possible scenarios, Jenna and Chad bring humor and practical wisdom to you just in time for holiday gatherings.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
proactive strategies to intentionally prepare your family for upcoming gatherings, including evaluating your own expectations, having conversations with your children, and even having conversations with grandparents about their expectations
roleplays to help you navigate criticism, unhelpful comments, or harsh discipline by grandparents or other relatives
that you can model humility and the value of connection to your parents and kids during holiday gatherings and difficult situations
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Parent Coaching
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Program
Connected Families Framework
Unsolicited Advice? 4 Ways to Respond (Connected Families PDF)
Guest Bio:
Jenna Williams and her husband, Sam, have been married for ten years. They live in Colorado Springs, CO, and have three amazing children ages 3-7. Jenna is a registered nurse by trade and works in a postpartum unit. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and loves caring for and supporting families! Connected Families has been a true blessing for her and her family, and she is excited to share that blessing with others. You can find her on Instagram: mindful_of_the-moment or email her directly: jennwilliams0411@gmail.com
Blocked Care: Rekindle Compassion in Your Heart | Ep. 155
Nov 13, 2023
In today’s episode on blocked care, Stacy talks with author Melissa Corkum about her book Reclaim Compassion. “Blocked care (also known as compassion fatigue) is when a parent becomes emotionally unavailable following repeated rejected attempts to support their child. The parent can still meet the child's physical needs; however, their ability to be attuned and empathetic decreases dramatically.” Blocked care can happen to any parent of a child who is struggling.
November is Adoption Awareness Month, and today we’re highlighting a valuable resource, especially to the adoptive and foster parents in our community and those who support them. Our guest, Melissa Corkum, is an adoptee, adoptive mom, speaker, and coach. She shares how blocked care can affect any caregiving relationship and offers hope for overcoming blocked care.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
the signs of blocked care
how to acknowledge and navigate feelings of shame and grief associated with blocked care
that healing blocked care starts with your own internal work—reclaim compassion for yourself first, then for your child
a process of daily practices to heal and spend more time out of blocked care
steps you can take toward radical compassion
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Reclaim Compassion book
Free Blocked Care Assessment
Foundations for Overcoming and Preventing Blocked Care - Course
How to Help a Spouse with Blocked Care from the AdoptionWise podcast
Parent Coaching with Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches
What Causes Anger Issues in a Child | Episode 46 with Lisa Qualls and Jim & Lynne Jackson
Hebrews 4:15
Guest Bio:
As an adoptee and adoptive mom, Melissa Corkum provides insight and resources to parents and professionals through her speaking, coaching, and writing. She is a TED Speaker, Safe and Sound Protocol Practitioner, Cultivate Connection Facilitator, Certified Enneagram Coach, and co-founder of AdoptionWise. Additionally, she co-authored Reclaim Compassion: The Adoptive Parents Guide to Overcoming Blocked Care with Neuroscience and Faith and Foundations for Overcoming and Preventing Blocked Care: The eight-session program for helping parents reclaim compassion. Melissa and Patrick live in Maryland and have six kids and two grandchildren. You can find all of Melissa‘s resources at https://adoptionwise.org.
Stories of Transformation…One Mom’s Journey
Nov 06, 2023
Listen as we chat with Anna Braasch about finding hope through the Connected Families Framework.
Do you remember when a friend introduced you to Connected Families? Or, maybe you are brand new to Connected Families’ resources–we’re so glad you found us. Regardless of when you found us and how familiar you are with the Framework, today’s podcast will likely resonate with you.
Today, Connected Families Executive Director, Anna Braasch, shares her story of finding hope through the Connected Families Framework. Anna candidly talks about her struggles as a young mom and how finding Connected Families’ resources changed her relationship with Christ and her approach to parenting. Anna also shares about Connected Families’ vision for the future and how you can get involved.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
one mom’s journey to hope (there were bumps along the way!)
that transformation in your family may be slow, but it is worth the effort
Connected Families’ three-year vision
how you can join the Donor Team to help support transformation in families
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart book
Parenting Tips emails from Connected Families
Serenity Prayer - Connected Families version - free download
Grace & Truth for Moms online course
2 Corinthians 10:5
Things Began to Change When…. To give a one-time donation
Make a 3-year commitment to support Connected Families' long-term vision
A Circle of Support: What Does a Mentor Do for Your Child?
Oct 23, 2023
Here at Connected Families, we often talk about how you can pass your faith on to your kids. Have you thought about how you can help sustain your child’s faith into their adult years? Research reveals that 60 percent of teens who have faith in high school will leave their faith by the time they are 30 years old. Thankfully, this does not have to be the case if you take proactive steps as your children grow.
In today’s podcast, Ben Bevis (Executive Director of Encircled) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share what a mentor can do for a child. Ben introduces resources for parents, youth workers, and even grandparents to support a young person’s faith, purpose, and calling from early childhood through their young adult years. You’ll be encouraged and inspired to support sustaining faith in your family today.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
what mentorship can look like at different ages
how to build a circle of support around your child
the impact that 5 intentional adults can have in the life of a young adult
things you can do at any age to notice and develop your child’s unique giftings
resources to guide you or your community in developing mentor circles
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
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Want to revisit certain parts of the podcast, or struggling to keep up with the audio? Click the button below to access a written transcript of this podcast episode.
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Mentioned in this podcast:
TreeHouse Hope
Encircled resources (use code CF50 for 50% off!)
The Intentional Father by Jon Tyson
1 Peter 4:10
Ephesians 2:10
Guest Bio:
Ben Bevis is the Executive Director of Encircled and is passionate about getting Mentor Circles around youth! Ben is also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Life Coach and has been a youth volunteer at his church for many years. Ben has been married to his wife Sara for 20 years. Together they have 3 wonderful children: Sophia (17), Reid (15), and Sam (12). They live in Minnesota and love to mountain bike, nordic ski, and go on adventures together. Questions about Encircled? You can email Ben directly at Info@encircled.org .
Feel Safe: How to Cultivate a Sense of Security in an Unsafe World
Oct 09, 2023
Children today face threats to their safety that are difficult to discuss. How do you help your kids process a school shooting or other violent attack? How can you hold the fear and anxiety they feel when you’re experiencing the same emotions? The answers aren’t simple, but you can support your child in helpful ways as they process scary situations.
In today’s conversation, Jody Goldie (LMFT at Midwest Trauma Center) and Katie Wetsell (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss feeling safe when the world feels unsafe. Katie shares wisdom from her personal experience navigating a school shooting, and Jody shares her expertise in trauma-related therapy. Together they will offer you grace and confidence as you navigate these situations with your children.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
the importance of processing your own emotions before trying to support your kids
how to be a safe landing place for your kids to process their emotions during traumatic experiences
what you can do when you sense that your child is feeling unsafe (with big or little things)
ways to move past simple reassurances and build confidence and trust
how to draw faith into the conversation as you wrestle with your kid’s toughest questions (it’s okay to not have all the answers!)
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
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Want to revisit certain parts of the podcast, or struggling to keep up with the audio? Click the button below to access a written transcript of this podcast episode.
.stk-5971c11,.stk-5971c11 .stk-button{width:100% !important}.stk-5971c11{flex:1 1 0 !important}CLICK HERE FOR TRANSCRIPT
Mentioned in this podcast:
Episode 124 | Empowering Your Differently-Wired Child
Psalm 46:1
Jeremiah 19:5
Parenting Tips Emails - Sign up now!
Guest Bio:
Katie Wetsell is our online course moderator. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, pediatric nurse, and mom of four through birth and adoption. She is passionate about encouraging and empowering parents to love their family with confidence and connection. Building on her bedside experience, she has also been trained in SPACE treatment (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) to help parents support their children in overcoming anxiety. Her website is www.parentwithhope.org.
Jody Goldie is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and received her Master's degree in Counseling from Gordon-Conwell Theological Seminary. She approaches the therapeutic relationship with warmth and the belief that all people have the ability to heal. She works with clients who have experienced complex trauma, post-traumatic stress, anxiety, and depression. Her training includes a family systems approach and incorporates that into the understanding of work with individuals and couples. Jody enjoys incorporating spirituality into therapy if that is desired by the client. You can find her at: www.mwtraumacenter.com.
Want To Show Grace to Your Kids? Soak In It First
Oct 02, 2023
Self-care is a hot topic, but what about soul-care? How can you open up space in your heart for God to meet you and speak to you in the middle of a busy, chaotic day? Or in the midst of your discouragement or frustration? Today’s conversation will encourage you that God is reaching out to you with His love and grace in the midst of everyday life.
Sharing her personal journey, Lydia Rex (mom of 2 and Connected Families Parent Coach) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for an interview about caring for your soul while parenting. And the best part is that, as you receive God’s grace, you’ll be equipped to show grace to your kids all the more.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how to start paying attention to the ways God speaks to you in small everyday moments
that you can experience God as your co-regulator as you seek to help your child regulate
a fresh perspective on the struggles your family might experience
questions you can ask to be open to hearing from God in the moment
scriptures that offer hope and perspective when you need a lifeline
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
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Looking for a transcript?
Click the button below to access a transcript of this podcast.
.stk-c27e4ab,.stk-c27e4ab .stk-button{width:100% !important}.stk-c27e4ab{flex:1 1 0 !important}CLICK HERE FOR TRANSCRIPT
Mentioned in this podcast:
Episode 138 | How to Encourage Critical Thinking for Little Ones
Episode 126 | Why Is My Child So Angry All the Time
Episode 89 | A Powerful New Perspective for Parenting
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course
Discipline That Connects online course
Parent Coaching
All Certified Connected Families Parent Coaches
John 21
John 14:26
Parenting Topics That Will Fill You With Hope
Sep 25, 2023
Do you wish you had a strong foundation to guide you through challenging situations with your kids? Or, do you know a little about the Connected Families Framework but want to grow your application of it? The parenting topics in today’s podcast can help build your foundation for parenting and help you apply the Connected Families Framework.
In this episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founders) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to touch on several parenting topics that are covered in-depth in the Discipline That Connects online course. Jim and Lynne wrote the course to equip parents to love their kids unconditionally while teaching them to take responsibility for their actions. Each topic includes a statement you can use to remind yourself of your parenting goals.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
key phrases that guide each level of the Connected Families Framework
key parenting statements mentioned in this podcast
Kids learn best when they feel safe.
My child is not my report card.
When kids misbehave, we have a golden opportunity to communicate unconditional love.
I can find and build strengths in my child even in the midst of misbehavior.
Effective discipline puts responsibility on kids to right their wrongs.
how the Discipline That Connects online course can help you discipline effectively and create lasting change for your family
If you’d like to learn more about the parenting topics in this conversation, register today for the Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course.
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects online course - Registration ends September 30th!
Psalm 139:23-24
Galatians 6
How to Discipline an Explosive Child—With Grace and Firmness
Sep 18, 2023
Wondering about disciplining an explosive child? You’re not alone! In fact, what to do with kid’s anger is one of our most frequent inquiries here at Connected Families. Aggressive behavior and explosive anger are intense challenges, and there is hope for change as you and your child build skills.
In today’s episode, Jessica Brandon (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) joins Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss the anger spectrum and practical ideas you can use to help a child with explosive anger. Jessica shares her personal experiences with her intense kids and insights as a parent coach to leave you encouraged about helping your child with anger.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
what’s happening inside your child when they have explosive anger
the spectrum of anger expression (from explosive to indirect to hidden)
ways to build the skill of respectful anger
insights to help a child who refuses to move past anger
proactive skills you can use to help a child with explosive anger
when to “worry” about toddler aggression
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Anger spectrum blog post
Ephesians 4:26
Proverbs 12:8
Proverbs 10:18
Ephesians 4:25
Learning Respectful Anger FREE printable PDF for parents to teach kids
Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course - Register Today!
Guest Bio:
Jessica Brandon is a mom to three energetic kiddos. She has a B.A. in Psychology with a Minor in Human Development and Family Studies and a Masters Degree in Christian Ministries. She believes one of the greatest gifts we can give our children is to parent them with the Father’s heart. The Connected Families Framework captures this so well! She would love to partner with you and empower you with tools to love and connect with your children. You can find her at: jessbrandoncoaching.com and on Instagram @jessbrandon_coaching.
Help! My Child Won't Listen
Sep 11, 2023
My child won’t listen! Sound familiar? If you’ve had that exasperated thought recently, you’re not alone. Obedience and cooperation are common struggles most families encounter. There may be a disconnect between your good intentions and what your kids experience and believe. That disconnect can fuel these listening troubles.
In today’s conversation, Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education & Equipping) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share a really practical skill for parents. It’s not a tip or a trick to manipulate behavior, but a fresh way to engage with your kids that invites cooperation. This skill is part of our Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course that’s loaded with practical ideas and resources to change the atmosphere in your home. If this conversation is helpful, you’ll love the online course. Registration is open now, and you can start Session 1 today!
In this podcast you’ll discover:
possible underlying struggles for kids who aren’t listening
common disconnects between parents’ good intentions and kids’ experiences
ways that your discipline sends messages that form your child’s identity
how “slow, low, listen” provides a way to engage with your child and receive from the Lord what you need in tough moments
the powerful dynamic shift that can happen with your child when you take the time to be a compassionate team leader
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course-Register Today!
Stickers! Slow, Low, Listen, plus others!
1 Corinthians 10:13
Discipline and Your Kids: Your Questions Answered
Sep 04, 2023
Your kids keep growing and changing, and so do your questions about parenting. Today’s podcast might answer a few of your questions and leave you wishing you had your own parent coach. In this Q&A style podcast, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Parent Coach) answer some common parenting questions from people enrolled in our Discipline That Connects online course.
If you’d like to have your parenting questions answered and grow in connection with your kids, register today for the Discipline That Connects online course. During the course, you’ll have several opportunities to submit your questions for Q&A sessions hosted by Certified Connected Families Parent Coaches. The course is also moderated by CF Parent Coach Katie Wetsell, (RN, MSN, SPACE-trained), who will encourage you and host guided check-ins to support you during the course.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
ways you can help two or more of your kids who are struggling at the same time
how you can ignore the behavior but not the child during a tantrum
that your calm presence when your child is struggling grows safety, love, and connection
why a deeper connection with you can help your child obey
how to stay emotionally safe (but intervene quickly and effectively!) when your child does something potentially dangerous
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course
Attachment Play (book)
Psalm 73
50 Self-Regulation Activities To Empower Your Child To Calm
Bonus Episode: Exciting News from Connected Families!
Sep 01, 2023
Parenting in the complexity of today’s world is stressful! The level of children’s anxiety and behavior challenges has skyrocketed. It can feel overwhelming and discouraging. But despite those struggles, you are still actively seeking God's grace and truth for yourself so you can pass it on to your children. Some days you probably do that a lot better than other days. But every day, it helps to know that you are not alone.
All of our efforts here at Connected Families are geared toward equipping you and supporting the work that God is doing in your family. As Philippians 1:6 says, “And I am sure of this, that He who began a good work in you (or your kids, your family) will bring it to completion… “ God is working on your behalf, and the Connected Families community is here to support you!
Being part of the community means that you may have:
listened to this podcast (we just crossed our 1.5 million listens mark!)
gotten our Thursday Parenting Tips emails
been resourced by one of our many free ebooks
taken at least one of our online courses
DTC registration is launching TODAY!
Whether you are just hearing about the course for the first time or have been thinking about taking it for a while - now is the time!
Once a year, we open up registration for the full, moderated version of the Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course, and today is the day!
The Connected Families Framework communicates the messages: You are SAFE, LOVED, CALLED and CAPABLE, and RESPONSIBLE for your actions. This course is the foundational curriculum that teaches that framework. There is also a book that Jim and Lynne Jackson wrote with the same name.
Have you already taken the Discipline That Connects online course? If the answer is “Not yet,” then we want to encourage you to go and sign up right now.
Discipline That Connects is for you if you are feeling stuck, old parenting patterns are not changing, or you have thought - yikes, what will the future look like?
Discipline That Connects is for you if you have been listening to the podcast for a while, and the tools we teach, like “Do-overs,” “Slow, Low and Listen,” and “Gifts-Gone-Awry,” are really resonating. If this sounds like you, it's time to dig into the full version.
Hundreds of alumni come back every year to take the course again because the content is so valuable. They want a refresher and to be part of all the extra resources we add.
What extras does DTC include this year?
Year-round, anyone can get access to the core video content only (basically a stripped-down version of the course) or even lead a small group through the course. But opening the FULL course, like we are right now in September, means that people worldwide are all going through the content at their own pace but are able to interact through comments and questions online. During these couple of months, there are weekly emails, a parent coach to moderate, Question & Answer opportunities, and so much more.
4 things that are new this year:
1. If you register early, you get to pick a free gift! Pick between:
the Parent Bundle, which includes our new stickers! ($18 value!)
DTC Welcome Packet ($15 value!)
the Healthy Rhythms for Daily Life online course which gives specific guidance on sleep issues, picky eating, etc… ($28 value!)
2. We are excited to offer an audio-only option while this cohort runs. You will be able to listen to the content on a walk or in the car just like you are listening to this little bonus podcast. This will be a game-changer!3. Guided Check-Ins: These 30-minute live check-in groups will boost the application of your learning into your everyday parenting and do it in a supportive environment. (Only 120 spots available.)4. Soul Care Sessions: (Less than 10 minutes each) Christian faith and biblical foundation are integrated into the whole course. During soul care videos, you will hear from parents about how the content of the course intersects with their faith and what that looks like in the hard times of parenting, tantrums, sleeplessness, and feeling overwhelmed. Soul care sessions will feed your soul and be an encouragement.
When you register, you get access to the entire course right away. Please share it with your friends. We hope you join us for this year's FULL version of Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart.
A Blessing for Parents
This blessing is taken from Susie Larson’s book, May His Face Shine Upon You:
May you grow to love and accept the you God is making you to be.May you walk in a new level of grace and gratitude that gives you peace and leaves others encouraged.May you be more apt to look forward with hope than you are to look back with regret.May your heart spill over with joy at the very thought of the story God is writing in your life.
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Registration for the Discipline That Connects online course!
Philippians 1:6
Sign up for Thursday parenting tips emails
Connected Families Framework
Visit the Connected Families website for more resources on applying the Framework
Trust Expert Dr. Henry Cloud Chats With Us About Parenting
Aug 28, 2023
According to today’s guest and trust expert, Dr. Henry Cloud, trust is fuel for all of life. Humans are hard-wired to trust, yet we still have to earn our children’s trust over and over again. Trust is sometimes a challenge in our other relationships as well.
In today’s show, Dr. Henry Cloud (psychologist and best-selling author) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss his latest book, Trust. Dr. Cloud shares about psychological safety and trust with plenty of real-life stories you’ll relate to.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
why parents have to earn their children’s trust
a nuanced understanding of safety and how it applies to trust in parenting
ways that God is safe and how parents can follow His example
how to build trust even when relationships have challenges
the 5 essentials of trust and how to apply them
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects online course (Registration opens next week!)
Psalm 22:9
Thursday Parenting Tips Emails - Sign up here
Connected Families stickers
Trust by Dr. Henry Cloud
Dr. Henry Cloud's website
Guest Bio:
Dr. Henry Cloud is a clinical psychologist, pastor to pastors, and New York Times bestselling author. His 46 books, including the iconic Boundaries, have sold over 20 million copies worldwide. Throughout his storied career as a clinician, he started treatment centers, created breakthrough new models rooted in research, and has been a leading voice on issues of mental health and leadership on a global scale. Dr. Cloud lives in Los Angeles with his wife, Tori, and their two daughters, Olivia and Lucy. You can find all of his resources at drcloud.com and boundaries.me.
Connect With Students: A Framework To Connect With & Nurture Responsibility In ALL Students
Aug 21, 2023
It’s nearly time to head back to school, and today’s episode is especially for anyone in a teaching role. Have you ever considered bringing the Connected Families Framework principles to your classroom at school or church? No matter what environment you teach in, you’ll learn to increase your students’ feelings of safety and acceptance while building their character and friendship skills. Listen in for ideas on how to better connect with students.
In today’s conversation, Sherry Fiscella (seasoned educator and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share practical ideas for bringing the Connected Families Framework into the classroom. Sherry brings years of experience as a teacher and home educator to show you how you can prepare yourself and set your students up for a great year.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
ideas for applying the Connected Families Framework in a secular setting
ways you can safeguard students from your own stress
insight into a student’s challenging behavior and what might be going on under the surface
how to build a rhythm for affirming your students' behavior and character
the art of asking effective questions to help students grow instead of just giving directions
ideas for teaching kids how to restore friendships after conflict
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course (Registration opens soon!)
Why Demanding Respect From Kids Doesn’t Work | Episode 48
Meet Juan and Nita from South Africa (couple running a boarding school)
Sign up for Thursday parenting tips emails
Psalm 78:4
Connected Families Framework graphic
Galatians 6:1
Visit the Connected Families website for more resources on applying the Framework (articles, podcasts, ebooks, etc.)
Guest Bio:
Sherry has been married for 28 years, and she and her husband, Troy, have two young adult children who are both married. Sherry is a former classroom teacher, school leader, and homeschooling mom who believes that one of the best ways to help kids is to support their parents. With her background in education, she brings a unique perspective and approach to parent coaching with lots of practical ideas to help moms and dads move toward more peaceful, purposeful, and joy-filled parenting. Sherry is also finishing up her master's degree in clinical mental health counseling in December and is thankful to the Lord for all that this new season is bringing… from a new career in coaching and counseling… to grandbabies! https://www.sherryfiscella.com/
Support Your Child's Mental Health with Dr. Caroline Leaf
Aug 14, 2023
Life is messy, and sometimes you probably feel like a mess. Your kids might feel like a mess at times too. It’s okay to be a mess! But what can you do when you or your child feels this way? How can you best support your child’s mental health?
In today’s podcast, Dr. Caroline Leaf (author, communication pathologist, and mother of 4) joins Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss mental health and her new book, How to Help Your Child Clean Up Their Mental Mess. Dr. Leaf shares her understanding of the mind-brain-body network and shares the practical resources she’s developed to support mental health.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
the power of your mind to control your brain, body, and how you show up in life
that even though you can’t change past experiences, you can heal them
what a neurocycle is and how it can help everyone in your family clean up mental messes
the analogy of a tree and how you can use it to think about thoughts and experiences
ways you and your child can clean up mental messes together
why managing mental health is a lifestyle
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
How To Help Your Child Clean Up Their Mental Mess
Brainee plush toy
Neurocycle App
Grace & Truth for Moms online course
Dr. Leaf on Instagram
Dr. Leaf on Facebook
Guest Bio:
Dr. Caroline Leaf has a Master’s and Ph.D. in Communication Pathology and does ongoing research and clinical trials in order to improve mental health interventions. Her passion is to help people see the power of the mind to change the brain, control chaotic thinking, and find mental peace. She is the host of the top-rated podcast, Cleaning Up the Mental Mess. Dr. Leaf is also the author of several bestselling books, including Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess, Switch On Your Brain, Think and Eat Yourself Smart, The Perfect You, Think, Learn, Succeed, and many more.
Is Your Child Crying at School or Daycare Drop-Off?
Aug 07, 2023
Maybe you’ve been there. Your child just doesn’t want to go to school or daycare. You’re not sure if she’s truly anxious and struggling or if she is just being defiant. It’s hard to know what to do, especially if your child is truly distressed and crying while she’s there.
Today’s podcast offers some real hope for you if your child is anxious about school or childcare. Dr. Suzy Youngquist (chiropractor and mom of four) and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about kids who are crying at school or daycare. Suzy shares her personal experience with dropping her child off at daycare, and Lynne brings insight and practical tools you can use today.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
what feeds children’s fear of school/childcare dropoff
simple ideas to soothe the fears and address the underlying causes
how to use play to understand what your child experiences
ways to address your own anxiety about dropping off your child
ideas to prep your child’s nervous system for school through connection and play
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Help! My Anxious Child Cries When Dropped Off at Daycare
The Invisible String book
Sign-up to receive Parenting Tips weekly from Connected Families
Guest Bio:
Inspired by a real-life story of watching her mom’s life transform through holistic health care, Dr. Suzy Youngquist has a passion to teach and equip others on how to reclaim their lives and well-being. Since opening Revolution’s doors in 2008, Dr. Suzy's passion for education and equipping has touched thousands of lives through lifestyle education events hosted by her clinic. Dr. Suzy's journey of motherhood is intimately tied to her heart for full-term, healthy pregnancies and babies, as well as whole families. Today, Suzy is a grateful mom of four incredible kids and wife to her number one cheerleader, Rob! You can find out more about Suzy and her clinic at: revolution-chiropractic.com.
Sensitive and Intense Kids: Your Questions Answered
Jul 31, 2023
Do you ever wish you had a parent coach in your living room to support you in your biggest parenting dilemmas? Well, we’ve got the next best thing. Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) has developed an all-new, research-based small group curriculum for the Sensitive & Intense Kids online course. When you join a small group, a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach will guide you through the course and offer practical, grace-filled suggestions for your biggest parenting challenges.
Today’s podcast is a little taste of some of the questions parents submitted during a recent Q&A session for the course. The responses come from the course facilitators: Lynne Jackson and Lydia Rex, and Katie Wetsell, our course facilitator. This course's new small group option allows you to create rich connections with other parents of sensitive and intense kids and a Certified Connected Families Parent Coach to answer your questions. Check it out!
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how to discern what type of response your child needs when struggling (connection, coaching, and/or correction)
a fresh perspective on letting your child “off the hook” during tough moments
ideas to support a child who needs creativity to remain regulated throughout the day
how structure and routine can help your child self-regulate
how motivation and wisdom are significant considerations for older kids
ways to weigh risk and reward with your older child
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course Small Group Info
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course
Daily Sensory Rythyms podcast with Amy Nyvall | Episode 112
[BONUS] Conclusion: Teaching Kids Forgiveness is Essential
Jul 24, 2023
This podcast episode is the conclusion of a podcast we released about the power of forgiveness and teaching that to our children. It is full of practical application and deep insight into the profound impact of forgiveness on our physical, spiritual, and mental health. It dives deep into the grace and mercy of Jesus' sacrifice and God's forgiveness.
If you have not yet listened to the first part of this podcast, please do that before listening to the conclusion.
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LISTEN TO PART 1
How do you teach forgiveness to your kids? Before we can guide our kids toward true forgiveness, we need to check our own understanding of God’s mercy and forgiveness for us. Check out Part 1 of this podcast before you listen to the conclusion for the full benefit.
.stk-524c43e,.stk-524c43e .stk-button{width:100% !important}.stk-524c43e{flex:1 1 0 !important}LISTEN TO THE PODCAST
Teaching Kids Forgiveness Is Essential: The Why & How
Jul 24, 2023
Restoring Relationships: Empower Kids to Want to Reconcile & Heal
Jul 17, 2023
Have you wondered if there is anything you can do to be proactive about the inevitable conflicts in your home? Many parents just want the fighting to stop, but what if you focused instead on restoring relationships? Jesus completed the ultimate restoration through the cross, and as you value this wonderful restoration, you can begin to bring peace and joy to your family.
In today’s podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founders) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about building the value of restoration in your family. Jim and Lynne are passionate about this topic and use scripture and their own experiences to offer a hope-filled picture of reconciliation for families.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how to develop a mindset of reconciliation that is rooted in Jesus Christ
the importance of modeling restoration in your own relationships
practical ideas you can use in the midst of conflict to show Christ’s gentleness and compassion
why joy is the key difference between solving problems and restoration
ways you can proactively prepare for restoring relationships in the future
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sibling Conflict online course
Contact Us if you’d like to connect about the content of this conversation
Galatians 6:1-2
Matthew 5:23-24
How To Help Siblings Stop Fighting All the Time
Jul 10, 2023
Do you feel like your kids are fighting all the time? They might be bickering, crying, or yelling, and you might feel exasperated and wonder how to turn things around. Conflicts will always be part of family relationships, but you can learn how to help kids stop fighting all the time and bring a richer connection to your family.
In today’s conversation, Katie Johnson (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) and Stacy Bellward (podcast host) give you a taste of Connected Families’ online course: Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding. They unpack a tool from the course called “The Peace Process” and give examples of how you could use it with your kids today.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sibling Conflict Online Course - Register Today!
50 Self-Regulation Activities to Empower Your Child to Calm
[Podcast] Why “Calm Down!” Doesn’t Work | Ep. 110
How to Encourage Critical Thinking for Little Ones
Jun 26, 2023
Do you ever feel like you have to tell your young child over and over again to do something? Parents often feel the need to tell, yet telling can lead to defensiveness and power struggles. Asking questions, on the other hand, engages your child’s whole brain and can lead to more positive interactions. You can encourage critical thinking, grow responsibility and emotional awareness, as well as build wisdom in your child when you ask instead of tell.
In today’s podcast, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder), and Lydia Rex and Pam Thompson (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about how to encourage critical thinking in kids. These experts share plenty of real-life scenarios and practical questions you can start using today to grow cooperation, connection, and wisdom with your young child.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how Jesus guided His disciples with questions
the importance of keeping a light-hearted attitude when asking questions
situations where you could feel stuck and what might be going on with your child
practical ideas to use with young children who struggle to answer questions
ways you can use “I wonder” statements to engage your child
the purpose and power of “3 Yeahs”
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
The Power of Questions online course - Name Your Own Price!
Mark 8
Guest Bio:
Lydia Rex is a registered nurse turned Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) practitioner and parent coach to families with young kids, especially those who have sensory needs or developmental trauma. No stranger to challenges in the parenting journey, Lydia offers empathy, encouragement, and a deep commitment to walking alongside parents with the Connected Families Framework. It’s her joy to see God’s grace healing the hearts of parents and children. Lydia, her husband Kyle, and their two kids live in Iowa, where they enjoy homeschooling, outdoor activities, and reading lots of books.
Pam Thompson is a Licensed Family and Early Childhood Educator as well as a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach. She is a mom of two young adult children and “like a mom” to two young adults who have experienced extensive trauma. Because of her education and experiences, she especially enjoys encouraging and supporting parents of young children, parents of young adult children, parents of kids from hard places, and teachers.
My Child Argues About Everything
Jun 19, 2023
“My child argues with everything I say!” Has that thought ever crossed your mind? Whether your child is 5 or 15, you can find yourself wrapped up in the dynamics of arguing, defensiveness, and power struggles. Thankfully, there is hope to break out of this pattern with some curiosity, questions, and a light-hearted attitude.
In today’s episode, Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education & Equipping) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about kids who love to argue and what parents can do about it. Chad and Stacy co-authored an online course called “The Power of Questions”. They share more about the course and offer practical ideas to change the dynamics of arguing in your home.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
why some kids are prone to argue and where the pattern of defensiveness may begin
that Jesus sets an example for asking questions (over 300 recorded in the Bible!)
the importance of your curiosity and light-hearted attitude
ways you can activate your child’s mind and build wisdom when you switch from “telling” to “asking”
how asking questions can help you let go of managing your child’s behavior and owning their problems
that building wisdom is a journey with your child
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Program
The Power Questions: Less Arguing, More Wisdom - Name Your Own Price Today!
Ephesians 2:10
3 Powerful Questions to Transform Your Parenting
Jun 12, 2023
Dads…today’s episode is especially for you. As a father, you probably have a lot of good intentions for your children. Do you ever wonder, though, if your parenting style gets in the way of your good intentions? If your answer is yes, you’re not alone. If you find your parenting goals and actions are sometimes out of alignment, there are some practical ideas to help you get back on track.
In today’s podcast, Jim Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Trevor Thurling (Connected Families Board Member) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation just for dads around some transformational questions for parenting. Trevor shares his journey that changed his parenting, and Jim equips you to bring your good intentions to your child’s heart.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how to show love instead of getting caught up in compliance
three key questions to begin to transform your parenting
the biblical basis for embracing humility and mutual submission
that Jesus models how to create an atmosphere of safety through love
how you can open up conversations with your kids by sharing about your own growth as a parent
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Submit your own Welcome Message for the Connected Families Podcast
Ephesians 5 & 6
Connected Families Parent Coaching
Guest Bio:
Trevor Thurling is a member of the Connected Families’ Board of Directors. With over 15 years of helping multinational companies, Trevor is a strategic thinker who leverages the power of human connections to build deeper relationships. He is a vocal proponent of the Connected Families Framework, having experienced the impact on his own family firsthand. Trevor and his wife, Stephanie, have three elementary-aged children, and he enjoys attending his kids’ activities and traveling.
Family Teamwork: How To Meet Together as a Family
Jun 05, 2023
Imagine your family working together to solve problems. Sounds amazing, right? But how do you get there? Busy schedules and personality differences can make “working together” seem like a big challenge. Thankfully, you can develop a practice to pull everyone together, have fun, and build wisdom.
In today’s podcast, Corrie and Alan Thetford (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about the positive impacts of family meetings. The discussion offers real-life examples and practical steps for family meetings with kids of any age (think toddlers to college students!).
In this podcast you’ll discover:
the many reasons why family meetings are a big win
how to set a light-hearted and fun tone for a family meeting and focus on connection
four steps to solve a problem using family teamwork
that family meetings are a safe, predictable place to practice for real-life situations and scenarios your kids may encounter
wisdom for replacing nagging with curious questions
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Power of Questions - Name Your Own Price campaign
Guest Bio:
Corrie and Alan Thetford have four children and are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches as well as instructors for CF coaches-in-training. They are passionate about multiplying the gospel by helping families transform power struggles and conflicts into opportunities for gospel messages.
How to Help Kids See God in Nature
May 22, 2023
Let’s get outside! No matter where you live (we have listeners all over the world!), getting outside is so good for so many reasons–for us and our kids. Sometimes getting outside means facing some challenges as well–poor weather, pesky insects, and even bad attitudes. It is possible to harness those challenges to build resilience, character, and memories in and with our kids.
In today’s podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founders) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about the rewards that await when you take your family outside. (You can even get them outside to help them see God in nature!) In Lynne’s words, “It takes resilience on the part of parents and kids to get outside, but the benefits are huge–physically, emotionally, and spiritually.”
In this podcast you’ll discover:
the game-changing impact of the phrase, “I want to go outside.”
ways you can model appreciating the outdoors for your kids
creative ideas to help your family be intentional about spending time in nature
that natural conversations about God happen when you are outside and may actually help kids see God in nature
that nature provides ample opportunities to grow resilience and character in our kids (and us!)
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Psalm 8:3-4
60 Creative Ways to Get Kids Moving and Laughing FREE PDF
Make a donation to Connected Families today!
Ever Feel Like the Not-So-Fun Mom?
May 15, 2023
Mama, does your to-do list ever get in the way of having fun with your family? Or is it hard to engage in the activities that your kids enjoy? If you ever feel like a not-so-fun mom, today’s podcast is for you! It is possible to cultivate a light-hearted spirit where fun, joy, and laughter flow more easily.
In today’s podcast, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation to encourage you toward light-hearted, joy-filled connections with your family. Lynne and Stacy share ideas and stories from other moms to inspire you toward joy, laughter, and FUN. (Including a giveaway for the book Have More Fun by MOPS CEO Mandy Arioto.)
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how to find “intersections of joy” for your family
that reducing your own stress and shame can nurture a light-hearted spirit in you
ideas to help you lean into your strengths and find your “sweet spot” for fun
the importance of appreciating your own gifts as well as those of your spouse
ideas to inspire joy and fun for you and your family!
Thanks for listening to today’s podcast. Check out our website for more resources to support your parenting, and don’t forget to reach out if you have questions. We are a listener-supported podcast, so your donation fuels our work! It is our joy to walk the parenting journey with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Have More Fun book
Psalm 46:1 - God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
Developing a Screen Plan for Your Family
May 08, 2023
a conversation with Arlene Pellicane
How To Guide Your Child To Love Honesty
Apr 24, 2023
There’s nothing like your child telling a blatant lie to trigger a strong reaction in you. You may want to focus your energy on shutting down the deception, but what if you responded with curiosity instead? Or maybe your child is more skilled with lying, and it’s hard to discern whether they are telling the truth. Either way, you are probably wondering about how to guide your child to love honesty.
In today’s podcast, Jim Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) and Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education & Equipping) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about how to guide your child to love honesty. With candid stories, Jim and Chad share a fresh perspective and practical ideas to grow a culture of truth-telling in your home.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
reasons kids lie (it’s not always obvious)
ways to engage your child in a curious and compassionate way
how to shift your energy so truthfulness becomes the focus in your home
ideas to grow your child’s identity as a truth-teller
ways to teach the skill of truth-telling in everyday moments
the importance of modeling honesty even when it’s tough (including the story of a mom who killed the family cat!)
We hope you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart book or audiobook
John 14:6 - “Jesus answered, ‘I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.’”
Deuteronomy 6:6-9 - talk about God’s commands in everyday life
"I killed the cat" blogpost - modeling truth-telling to your kids
We are a listener-supported podcast. Donate to Connected Families today!
Healthy Mealtimes for Children Who Are Picky | Ep. 130
Apr 10, 2023
Are healthy mealtimes at your house often a place of struggle? Have you ever thought, “My child won’t eat anything but junk food”? So many families experience these issues, and there is hope to move from "picky, picky" to peace around food. The way may be simpler than you expect through consistency, effort, and flexibility.
In today’s episode, Christina Jax (Registered Dietician and Nutritionist) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss mealtimes, food choices, and supporting kids to eat a variety of healthy foods. Christina brings her experience as a mom to a child with sensory issues and her professional background to offer practical ideas for improving a child’s experiences with food.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
factors that may contribute to a child’s selective food choices
the difference between sensory issues and preferences when it comes to food
why consistency and flexibility are effective tools for offering new foods at the table
the importance of involving a child in meal planning and preparation
that an awareness of your own relationship with food can help keep your issues from influencing your child’s experiences with food
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Picky Picky ebook - Free Connected Families Resource
Guest Bio:
Christina is the Co-Founder of A4 Health, whose professional mission is fueling fun lives and supporting individuals and organizations to achieve optimized health. Combining 20+ years in behavioral and nutrition science, Christina’s approach is to make healthy “easy” and prove the Return on Investment (ROI) for each individual or group she serves! Christina currently serves as Program Director and Assistant Professor of Nutrition at Northwestern Health Sciences University. She is a team dietitian for the Minnesota Wild and San Jose Sharks. She also has a podcast. Check her out on Spotify and iTunes at Connect the Dots with Christina Jax.Christina’s website https://www.a4.health/On Instagram: @a4healthcoach
Practical Ideas for Parenting the Middle Years
Mar 27, 2023
Do you have a child in the middle years, or are those years just a few steps away? (Keep in mind, puberty can begin as early as nine years old!) The middle years can be a tumultuous time for a child. Their body makes significant changes, and so does their brain! So, what does a child need from their parents during this season, and how do parents guide a child who seems to suddenly have lots of new attitudes and opinions?
In today’s episode, Cynthia Tobias (co-author of Middle School: The Inside Story) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss parenting through the middle years. Cynthia brings her professional and personal experiences to offer practical tools for speaking to, guiding, and supporting a child in the middle years with grace and connection.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
the middle schooler’s biggest fear…and how to help them
how to change your parenting to adapt to your child’s changing needs
ways to shift responsibility and decision-making to the child while still offering accountability and a safety net
why it’s okay and important to let a child fail
how to encourage and connect with the heart of your middle schooler
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Middle School: The Inside Story by Cynthia Tobias and Sue Acuna
Do You Know What I Like About You? YouTube Video by Cynthia
Cynthia's Facebook page
Cynthia's website - free PDF about middle school
Donate to Connected Families
CF Facebook
CF Instagram
Guest Bio:
Cynthia Tobias has a successful background that includes over 30 years of private practice, eight years of teaching high school, and six years in law enforcement. She has authored 13 books and is a featured guest on radio and television, a popular presenter for businesses, government agencies, churches, and schools throughout the U.S. and the world. Cynthia received her B.A. at Northwest Nazarene University, her Master’s Degree at Seattle Pacific University, and an Honorary Doctorate from Northwest Nazarene University in 2015. She is the mother of twin sons, now adults, and she and her husband, Jack, live in the Seattle area. Learn more about Cynthia by visiting her website, www.cynthiatobias.com.
Is Your Child’s Misbehavior Actually a Gift? | Ep. 128
Mar 20, 2023
What if underneath your child’s misbehavior was a good gift? Sound too good to be true? It’s not! Connected Families teaches this idea as a "Gift Gone Awry." This gift may not always come out in a helpful way, but it could be shaped and guided to be a blessing to others.
In this podcast, Connected Families Co-Founder Lynne Jackson and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about the amazing gifts that might be hidden in your child’s misbehavior.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
how your thoughts about your child can become their identity
the biblical basis for seeing gifts in misbehavior, including references
examples of how to find a gift gone awry and coach a child to be a blessing
ways to bring your child’s struggle before God and shift your perspective
that focus is fertilizer–what you pay attention to grows!
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
John 14:26-27
Ephesians 2:10
Mark 8:32
Luke 16
1 Thessalonians 2:11-12
Hebrews 11:1
Acts 20
Weekly Parenting Tips Email...link to share with a friend
Nurture Shock book
Donate to Connected Families
CF Facebook
CF Instagram
connectedfamilies.org
Guest Bio:
Lynne Jackson has over 25 years of experience as a pediatric occupational therapist working with children with sensory processing disorder, ADHD (including her own kids!), OCD, ODD, and autism spectrum disorders. As a speaker, certified life coach, podcaster, and author, Lynne has helped thousands of parents learn to be peaceful, purposeful, and confident. In 2002, she and her husband, Jim, founded Connected Families, a ministry that helps parents learn to embody God’s grace in the midst of family life.
.stk-4c52f18{margin-bottom:25px !important}Lydia Rex is a registered nurse turned TBRI practitioner and parent coach to families with young kids, especially those who have sensory needs or developmental trauma. No stranger to challenges in the parenting journey, Lydia offers empathy, encouragement, and a deep commitment to walking alongside parents with the Connected Families framework. It’s her joy to see God’s grace healing the hearts of parents and children. Lydia, her husband Kyle, and their two kids live in Iowa, where they enjoy homeschooling, outdoor activities, and reading lots of books.
Family Activities to Prepare for Easter
Mar 06, 2023
a conversation with Laurie Christine
Why Is My Child So Angry All the Time?
Feb 27, 2023
Are you trying to understand your child’s frequent frustration or angry eruptions? Do you find yourself turning to the internet to ask, “Why is my son so angry with me?” or “Why is my daughter so angry all the time?” The truth is, there is usually more going under the surface of anger. Likely, that anger is protecting some softer emotions, such as feeling anxious, alone, or discouraged, to name a few. You can have compassion and come alongside them with loving support when you seek to understand what is really going on. But how do you get started?
In this podcast, Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder and Occupational Therapist) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and RN) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about anger and anxiety in children. Drawing on their experience supporting families, Lynne and Lydia share how you can look beneath your child’s anger to get out of a stress cycle and into a healing pattern.
In this podcast you'll discover:
underlying stress factors that influence angry behavior
the relationship between anger and anxiety
when to use an “I wonder if…” question to help build emotional intelligence and understanding
how you can move to compassion and connection when your child erupts in anger
trauma’s role in anger, including its effects on a child’s developing brain and nervous system
activities to do with your child to grow their emotional awareness and build skills to unpack what’s going on under the surface
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - Register Today!
Paper plate activity
Iceberg illustration for older kids
Proverbs 29:11: Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.
Guest Bio:
Lynne Jackson has over 25 years of experience as a pediatric occupational therapist working with children with sensory processing disorder, ADHD (including her own kids!), OCD, ODD, and autism spectrum disorders. As a speaker, certified life coach, podcaster, and author, Lynne has helped thousands of parents learn to be peaceful, purposeful, and confident. In 2002, she and her husband, Jim, founded Connected Families, a ministry that helps parents learn to embody God’s grace in the midst of family life.
Lydia Rex is a registered nurse turned TBRI practitioner and parent coach to families with young kids, especially those who have sensory needs or developmental trauma. No stranger to challenges in the parenting journey, Lydia offers empathy, encouragement, and a deep commitment to walking alongside parents with the Connected Families Framework. It’s her joy to see God’s grace healing the hearts of parents and children. Lydia, her husband Kyle, and their two kids live in Iowa, where they enjoy homeschooling, outdoor activities, and reading lots of books.
Your Child Receives A Diagnosis...Now What?
Feb 20, 2023
Is it worth getting a diagnosis?
Empowering Your Differently Wired Child
Feb 13, 2023
Do you have a child who is wired differently? You’ve probably felt frustrated or discouraged at times about how to support your child through daily routines or going to school. It may be challenging to know what your child needs and offer that at the right time.
In today’s podcast, Katie Wetsell and Corrie Thetford (Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about empowering your uniquely and wonderfully wired child.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
How to evaluate what’s going on in your heart about your child. Do you need to “fix” your child? Or better understand your child?
The opportunity therapy presents for you to learn with your child and as well as keep the momentum from therapy going at home
Ideas for supporting your child in a learning environment at school or home and how to help your child discover and accept what they need to be successful
Ways to talk about and celebrate differences in your family
How one 13-year-old has felt supported and empowered by his parents
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - Register Now!
Treasure Tree: Helping Kids Understand Their Personality by John Trent
John 9:1-3
Ecclesiastes 3:11
Guest Bio:
Corrie Thetford and her husband Alan have four children and are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches as well as instructors for CF coaches-in-training. They are passionate about multiplying the gospel by helping families transform power struggles and conflicts into opportunities for gospel messages.
Katie Wetsell is our online course moderator. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, pediatric nurse, and mom of four through birth and adoption. She is passionate about encouraging and empowering parents to love their family with confidence and connection. Building on her bedside experience, she has also been trained in SPACE treatment (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) to help parents support their children in overcoming anxiety. Her website is www.parentwithhope.org.
Rylan Wetsell is Katie's 13-year-old, bright, witty son who is overcoming the challenges associated with being differently wired to grow in wisdom and courage. He is an advocate, with his mom, for himself and others affected by stuttering, Tourette's Syndrome, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and learning disabilities.
Advocating for Your Sensitive or Neurodiverse Child
Jan 30, 2023
Maybe you’ve received a message from your child’s teacher about his behavior at school, or you want to set your child up for a good experience as she begins a new activity. Communicating with teachers, coaches, and other adults about how to support your sensitive or neurodiverse child may feel difficult to navigate, but thankfully other parents have also walked that journey and have some practical wisdom to share.
In today’s podcast, Marni Love (former public school teacher, home educator, and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) and Taylor Irby (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share their experiences about advocating for a sensitive child. Taylor and Marni offer practical ideas to empower you so your child can receive the support they need in any environment.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
that a diagnosis can unlock the doors to help you understand and advocate for your neurodiverse child
how to flip the script of negative complaints from teachers and other adults to positive feedback
ways to support your child in making and keeping friends
how you can be firm and kind with other adults in order to help your child thrive (and keep your sanity!)
how to create an advocacy sheet about your child for teachers (downloadable link)
where to get a medical diagnosis and how that impacts an IEP/504 plan at school
steps that can help you and your spouse get on the same page
how to gather a professional team and personal support for the journey with your child
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Last week’s podcast: How To Know If Your Child Needs a Diagnosis or Extra Support | Episode 122
Advocacy page by Taylor Irby
Sensitive & Intense online course - Register now!
Connected Families Parent Coaching
ABC’s of Affirmation
Focus is Fertilizer
Guest Bios:
Marni Love is a former public school teacher and has been a home educator for the past 13 years. She is a Homeschool Mentor and Certified Connected Families Parent Coach. Marni enjoys spending time with her husband, Eric, and their three sons in the beautiful mountains and beaches of Northern California. You can connect with her through her website: marnilove.com
Taylor Irby is a mother to 5 kids, and she understands the struggles parents face. Every day she faces ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays, and adoption trauma. She, too, has sat in the midst of challenges and searched the world for answers. Taylor read book after book and got excited over methods that were short-lived. That is when she hit the wall of desperation and sought parent coaching through Connected Families. Taylor ultimately became a coach through their training program to help others like her. She has seen transformation in her home through working with a framework that not only has changed her children’s behavior but their hearts as well. You are not alone on this parenting journey. There is hope, and you can enjoy your children, build that relationship you have wanted and see behavior change. You can learn more about Taylor at taylorirbycoaching.com, and on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/taylor.irby.5 and Instagram @taylorirbycoaching
How To Know If Your Child Needs a Diagnosis or Extra Support
Jan 23, 2023
Have you ever wondered, “What’s going on with my child? Is this ‘normal’ behavior, or is there something more going on?” If you’ve asked these questions, you may be wondering if it’s worth seeking a diagnosis for your struggling child.
All children go through more challenging developmental seasons, but some children are wired differently altogether, also known as neurodiverse. These kids often benefit from the understanding and support of professionals.
In today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) are joined by Mandy Cuda, MD. Listen in on a profound conversation to help parents navigate the choice to seek a diagnosis or support for a child who is struggling.
Through this conversation, you’ll learn:
to reflect on your motivations for seeking a diagnosis
how to know when to seek help and what to do if/when it is time
how you can include your child in the process of seeking support and normalizing differences
the power of your curiosity and observations over time to guide you
that you know your child best
that your child may have incredible potential masked in the struggle
the importance of prioritizing sleep, activity, and nutrition to help find your child’s baseline
current information about genetic and environmental impacts on neurodiversity
about the complexity of overlapping diagnoses in neurodivergent people
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Submit your own Welcome for the CF podcast
Psalm 139
Isaiah 40:25-31
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Program
Share the Connected Families Podcast with a friend
7 Calming Strategies free online course
Guest Bio:
Dr. Amanda “Mandy” Cuda is a family physician and Connected Families Parent Coach-in-training. She lives in Washington with her husband, a military pediatric urologist, and four amazing kids. Her connection with Connected Families began more than 20 years ago when, as a new Wheaton college grad, she worked with Jim and Chad in Minnesota. She went on to earn her MD from the Uniformed Services University and an MPH from the University of Washington. She served in the military for most of her healthcare career but has also served in community primary care and virtual care delivery.
Teaching Kids the Framework | Ep. 121
Jan 16, 2023
If you’re reading this, you probably hope to bring more connection, grace, and unconditional love into your parenting this year. And maybe you’re wondering how you can get your whole family on the same page. The Connected Families Framework can help you become the parent you want to be, and teaching the principles to your kids might be simpler than you expect.
On today’s podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss ways parents can model and teach each principle of the Framework: Foundation, Connect, Coach, Correct. This podcast includes a downloadable, 5-session mini curriculum developed by Jim and Lynne to help teach the Framework to children in interactive and hands-on ways.
Get your FREE Family Activity Guide
This 5-session activity guide will help you introduce your kids to the Connected Families Framework in a fun and inviting way!
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
practical ways to model each area of the Framework for your children
how talking out loud about the whys of your parenting can serve as a powerful teacher to your children (and a source of accountability for you!)
ideas for strengthening the connection between your children and supporting their reconnection after conflict
ways you can engage with scripture as a family and help your children learn to listen for what God may be teaching them
how you can guide your family to value reconciliation in all relationships
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Teaching Kids the Framework PDF - 5-session mini curriculum
Connected Families Framework
Podcast Episode 113: How to Pray With Your Child
Ephesians 2:10 NIV and ESV
CF Certified Parent Coaching Program
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course (coming soon!)
Affiliate Program
Our Top Podcast of 2022
Jan 02, 2023
Photo by freestocks on Unsplash
The Connected Families Podcast continues to encourage and equip parents all over the world. Did you know we recently exceeded 1 million listens? THANK YOU! As we head into another year of podcasting, we thought it would be fun to share our most listened-to podcast of 2022. If you have already enjoyed our top podcast, we are including links to the next four most popular podcasts of 2022. It's time to pop in your headphones, grab a few baskets of laundry to fold or take the dog for a long walk. What podcast most encouraged you in 2022? Let us know! We'd love to hear from you!
Our Top Podcast of 2022
Ep. 101: Does Attachment Style Matter?
Your relationship with your child might feel “off,” but you’re not sure why. Could it be that the way you were parented impacts the way you parent? Your attachment style affects all your most important relationships – from spouse to children to close friends. So, what is “attachment style” anyway? And does attachment style really matter?
On this episode, we welcome guests Milan and Kay Yerkovich, the authors of How We Love. Together we discuss how we bring the attachment style from our parents to our own relationships, especially to our kids.
Four more amazing podcasts from 2022
Ep. 100: Ending the Shame Cycle
Are you hard on yourself as a parent? As a person? It’s so easy to get caught up in what feels like failure to us. We want so much to be good parents! Though it’s unintentional, we can project our own feelings of shame onto our kids. Then we feel even worse. Shame can be so destructive to us and to our relationships. What does ending the shame cycle look like?
If you have ever felt stuck in this kind of a cycle, please listen to this podcast. In this milestone podcast (our 100th episode!) we talk about a prevalent and powerful concept that has resounded with our Connected Families community for nearly 20 years: Moving forward from shame to the freedom of living in God’s grace and truth.
Ep. 102: How To Be a More Playful Parent
Sometimes parenting can feel like one big list of things you have to get done. It can be so hard to switch gears from the many demands of being a parent to having a joyful and playful time with your children! Yet research shows that playfulness brings connection and communicates in a language that helps kids learn!
This podcast, with guest Joy Wendling, has great ideas to help you: calm your child’s brain and yours, provide opportunities to teach skills, enable problem-solving capability, reach kids who are struggling, and communicate to your child, “I enjoy you!”
Ep. 103: Should Dads Demand Respect?
When our “respect buttons” get pushed, it’s tempting to grasp for control and command obedience. But in doing so, we might find ourselves sacrificing connection and true, heartfelt respect with our kids. You want to build connection and respect. So what can you do? How can you respond?
This podcast is a heartfelt conversation about respect. When we engage with our kids in humility and curiosity instead of control, we model what respect looks like and safely earn their respect and trust. Treating our children with respect helps us diffuse a tense situation and paves the way for connection, conversation, and understanding.
Ep 111: Coaching Kids to "Make It Right"
Do you sometimes struggle to think of an appropriate consequence for your child’s misbehavior? Or dole out punishment only to have your child refuse to accept the punishment? Sigh.
Offering consistent and effective discipline can feel like an ongoing and overwhelming challenge. Listen in as the conversation on this podcast explores the messages we send through discipline and how to coach children to be responsible for their actions.
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Grandparenting Through a New Lens
Dec 19, 2022
Photo by Phillip Goldsberry on Unsplash
Grandparents, we have something specifically for you today! (If you’re a parent, listen and then consider sharing this episode with a grandparent in your life.) You long to build more connection into your relationships with your grandchildren or to be more supportive of your adult children as they learn to parent. The Connected Families Framework can help you build connection and be the supportive grandparent you long to be.
In today’s episode, two Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches, Cindy Stonestreet (Grandmother and CRNA) and Dijea Young (Grandmother and homeschool mentor), join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for an encouraging conversation. Cindy and Dijea share their hearts about the powerful impact the Connected Families Framework has had in their daily interactions with their grandchildren.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
it’s never too late to change your approach to discipline
practical ways to infuse the interactions with both your adult children and grandchildren with safety, connection, and unconditional love
how you can respond to your grandchild’s meltdown or defiance with a fresh approach
examples of how you can support and respect your adult children in their parenting
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Framework
Connected Families Parent Coaching
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Program
Request a meeting with Connected Families Executive Director, Anna Braasch
Give a year-end gift to Connected Families
Guest Bios:
Cindy Stonestreet is a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and grandmother of five lively grandchildren. She has worked as a registered nurse for 39 years: 18 years in the NICU and 15 years as a CRNA at Women and Children's Hospital. She seeks to guide parents and grandparents to develop skills and wisdom in their children and grandchildren.
Dijea Young has served children and families most of her adult life as a credentialed teacher, homeschool accrediting consultant, and now as a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach. For 29 years, she home-educated her own 8 children and now enjoys her ever-growing number of grandchildren…Number 10 is expected any day!
Navigating Family Gatherings
Dec 12, 2022
Are you looking forward to celebrating Christmas with family but dreading unsolicited advice from well-meaning relatives? You are not alone. Changes in your daily routines, travel, lack of sleep, and large gatherings set the stage for parenting challenges. Sometimes these difficult situations may be scrutinized by other adults in your family. This may lead to comments or questions that don’t feel supportive. Navigating family gatherings can be tricky!
On today’s podcast, Chad Hayenga (Director of Education & Equipping) and Jenna Williams (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) for a conversation about navigating the holidays with relatives. Specifically, how you can respond when grandparents or other family members criticize you (or your children). Role-playing possible scenarios, Jenna and Chad bring humor and practical wisdom to you just in time for holiday gatherings.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
proactive strategies to intentionally prepare your family for upcoming gatherings, including evaluating your own expectations, having conversations with your children, and even having conversations with grandparents about their expectations
roleplays to help you navigate criticism, unhelpful comments, or harsh discipline by grandparents or other relatives
that you can model humility and the value of connection to your parents and kids during holiday gatherings and difficult situations
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Parent Coaching
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach Program
Connected Families Framework
Unsolicited Advice? 4 Ways to Respond (Connected Families PDF)
Guest Bio: Jenna Williams and her husband, Sam, have been married for ten years. They live in Colorado Springs, CO, and have three amazing children ages 3-7. Jenna is a registered nurse by trade and works in a postpartum unit. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach and loves caring for and supporting families! Connected Families has been a true blessing for her and her family, and she is excited to share that blessing with others. You can find her on Instagram: jennawilliams0411.
Gospel in Parenting Part 2
Nov 28, 2022
Today’s podcast is part two of a series on how the gospel informs the Connected Families Framework. Part one explored the gospel in the first three layers of the Framework. Today’s conversation will unpack how the gospel is woven into the final level of the Framework: Correct: “You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions.”
Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Connected Families Co-Founders Jim and Lynne Jackson for a conversation that is rich with scripture and reflection. Together, they dig into the true goal of discipline as you seek to correct your children when they misbehave.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how your approach to correction can have a powerful impact in-the-moment, and a lasting impact on your child’s openness to the Holy Spirit and discipleship to Christ
ideas for modeling restoration and reconciliation in your home
how the fruit of the Spirit can guide you to gently restore your child
ways you can set the example of humility for your family
that correction is ultimately about you becoming more like Jesus in a way that attracts your child to a life with Jesus
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
The Gospel in Our Parenting, Part 1 | Ep. 107
Check out the first part of this podcast where we dig into how The Gospel informs the first three levels of the Framework.
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Mentioned in this podcast:
The Gospel In Our Parenting, Part 1 - Episode 107
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course (Coming Soon!)
Donate to Connected Families
Request a meeting with CF Executive Director
Romans 6:23
2 Corinthians 5:17-18
Galatians 6:1
Galatians 5:22-23 (Fruit of the Spirit)
Hebrews 12:11
Matthew 5:23-24
Matthew 18
Acts 3:19
2 Corinthians 7:1
The Brain Impact of Gratitude
Nov 21, 2022
with Dr. Troy Spurrill
When Parenting Is Harder Than You Thought It Would Be | Ep. 115
Nov 14, 2022
Before you had children you may have held idealistic visions of what family life and parenting would be like someday. For some parents, as their hopes and expectations meet the realities of daily life, they begin to feel disillusioned. Insecurities and anxiety around parenting may surface, and they may ask, “Am I enough? Am I the right parent for this child?”
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Taylor Irby (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) for a conversation exploring how to move past our own expectations and into the security God has for us as parents. Both Stacy and Taylor have children through birth as well as adoption.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
messages you can use to challenge insecurities you experience in parenting
ways control can show up in your behavior toward yourself and your children
steps to help you move from anxiety and control to Truth in the moment
what happens in our minds, hearts, and behavior when we trust that God is taking care of us
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Episode 98 - Can you parent well when you’re anxious - Guest Taylor Irby
Connected Families Certified Parent Coach
Connected Families Framework
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course (Coming soon!)
Slow, low, and listen
Romans 5:8
Guest Bio:
Taylor Irby is a mother to 5 kids, and she understands the struggles parents face. Every day she faces ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays, and adoption trauma. She too has sat in the trenches and searched the world for answers. Taylor read book after book and got excited over methods that were short-lived. That is when she hit the wall of desperation and sought parent coaching through Connected Families. Taylor ultimately became a coach through their training program to help others like her. She has seen transformation in her home through working with a framework that not only has changed her children’s behavior but their hearts as well. You are not alone on this parenting journey. There is hope and you can enjoy your children, build that relationship you have wanted and see behavior change. You can learn more about Taylor at taylorirbycoaching.com, and on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/taylor.irby.5 and Instagram @taylorirbycoaching
Pursuing Kids Who Push Away
Oct 24, 2022
If you’re here, your parenting goal is likely to have a connected family. But what do you do when you have a child who is pulling away from you? A child who does not seem to want connection? Feelings of disconnection from a child can be painful and challenging for a parent. Even in the most “connected” families, this can happen. You are not alone.
In today’s podcast, Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education & Equipping), and Jim Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founder) have a conversation about pursuing kids who push away. They share stories from their own parenting journey as they explore practical ideas to pursue a child when connection feels out of reach.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
possible reasons why a child may push awayhow a parent’s beliefs and thoughts may influence what’s going on simple questions that can create opportunities for connectionhow to become a student of your child and let them guide you towards connection
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
My Child Wants Nothing To Do With Me. Is There Hope?Matthew 12:342 Corinthians 10:5Ephesians 1Ephesians 2Colossians 3Donate to Connected FamiliesConnected Families Parent Coaching
How To Pray With Your Child
Oct 17, 2022
Prayer is a meaningful faith practice that you probably want to pass on to your kids, but teaching your kids to pray may feel overwhelming. You may feel unsure how to answer your kid’s questions about prayer or how to incorporate regular prayer times with them into your daily life.
In today’s podcast, Stephanie Thurling (author and co-founder of Raising Prayerful Kids) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to talk about teaching children to pray in meaningful ways. Stephanie’s experience working with youth and families inspired her to start her ministry equipping parents to pray with their children.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
practical tools you can use for how to pray with your child how to create moments of connection through blessing prayersways to use the Bible to guide prayer with your kidscommon pitfalls parents experience when they try to teach their kids to pray (and what to do about them!)
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Parenting Strengths AssessmentLectio DivinaRaising Prayerful Kids BookRaising Prayerful Kids Ministry
Guest Bio:
Steph Thurling is co-founder of Raising Prayerful Kids, a ministry that equips parents to pray with their kids in meaningful ways. She has her master’s degree in youth, family, and culture from Fuller Theological Seminary and worked in youth ministry for several years before deciding to stay home with her kids.
Daily Sensory Rhythms to Bring Peace to Your Home
Oct 10, 2022
Your child is done with school (or preschool) for the day and instead of relaxing, you’re now navigating meltdown after meltdown. Why do the strategies that worked with one child fall flat with another? Do you find yourself wondering, “Will it always be this way?”
In today’s podcast, Lynne Jackson (Occupational Therapist and Connected Families Co-Founder), and Amy Nyvall (seasoned mom and past coaching client) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share ideas on how daily sensory rhythms can bring down the chaos and cultivate more peace in your home. Through Amy’s story, you’ll learn how daily rhythms that incorporate sensory activities will often help your child avoid meltdowns and reestablish calm in moments of chaos.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
how to find calm and clarity as a parent to guide your family to take the next step
ideas to schedule your day to create a culture of peace in your home
ideas to help equip your family through the challenges of mornings, dinner time, and quiet time
activities to try when everybody feels off (one even includes chocolate!)
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Sensitive & Intense Kids online course - Coming Early 2023!
7 Practical Calming Strategies for Kids-FREE online course (this includes the video of Amy’s husband doing the burrito roll with kids)
Guest Bio:
Amy and her husband Andrew have been married for 16 years and live among the fir trees outside Portland, Oregon. They enjoy outdoor adventures as much as possible and have a blast homeschooling their three intensely creative, adventurous, and active children. In her spare time, you’ll find Amy encouraging moms and homeschoolers, learning alongside the kids, or slipping away to read from a stack of her own books. Amy is passionate about creating a family culture that equips our children to be prepared to serve the Lord in the days ahead.
Coaching Your Kids to “Make It Right”
Sep 26, 2022
Do you sometimes struggle to think of an appropriate consequence for your child’s misbehavior? Or dole out punishment only to have your child refuse to accept the punishment? Sigh.
Offering consistent and effective discipline can feel like an ongoing and overwhelming challenge.
In today’s episode, Chad Hayenga (Connected Families Director of Education & Equipping), and Katie Wetsell (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss what effective discipline can look like. (It IS possible!) The conversation explores the messages we send through discipline and how to coach children to be responsible for their actions.
In this podcast you’ll discover:
3 key questions to ask in any discipline situationhow to work with your child as a team for more effective disciplinethe opportunity in discipline to offer and receive God’s grace and forgivenesshow to help your child see the natural impacts of their behaviorhow to guide your child to “make it right” how “paused privileges” can help motivate a child
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course registration Connected Families Parent Coach CertificationConnected Families Parent CoachingConnected Families PodcastGalatians 6:7
Guest Bio:
Katie Wetsell is our Discipline That Connects online course moderator. She is also a Connected Families Certified Parent Coach, pediatric nurse, and mom of four through birth and adoption. She is passionate about encouraging and empowering parents to love their families with confidence and connection. Building on her bedside experience, she has also been trained in SPACE treatment (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) to help parents support their children in overcoming anxiety. Her website is www.parentwithhope.org.
Why "Calm Down!" Doesn't Work
Sep 19, 2022
In today’s episode, Corrie and Alan Thetford (founders of Building Wise Families and Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss how to help our children want to calm down when they are experiencing big emotions. The conversation explores what’s going on in us as parents when we try to make our child calm down, the role of empathy in supporting our child’s big emotions, and what’s going on beneath the surface of our child’s big outburst.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
what’s happening in your child’s brain and body that makes them not want to calm downhow your good intentions to make your child stop or take a break during a meltdown can actually escalate emotionsempathy’s role in helping your child feel understood and able to move through big emotions so they want to calmwhy something small is often the trigger for your child’s cascade of emotion
We hope that you have been encouraged by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course Connected Families Parent CoachingConnected Families Coaching Certification programCorrie & Alan Thetford's Podcast - Building Wise Families
Guest Bio:
Alan and Corrie have four children and are Connected Families Certified Parent Coaches as well as instructors for CF coaches-in-training. They are passionate about multiplying the gospel by helping families transform power struggles and conflicts into opportunities for gospel messages.
Calming Yourself Before Going Into Discipline
Sep 12, 2022
“Why are you so mad all the time?” Do you ever hear this from your child? You probably don’t intend to look mad. You may not even be aware of your furrowed brow or irritated expression. And it’s especially hard to keep your cool in the heat of the moment when your child pushes your buttons.
But what message does your expression send to your child? Sure, you could try to put on a happy face and force a polite smile, but it’s not the most effective or long-term solution. So what can you do to keep things truly calm?
In today’s podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (Co-Founders of Connected Families) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to dig deep into an important principle of the Connected Families Framework. At the foundation level of the framework, you learn to move from “fast, large, and loud” to “slow, low, and listen.” This helps kids feel safe during discipline.
Often, parents leverage fear and intensity to “change” kids’ behavior. But kids read facial expressions more than anything else. Have you ever noticed your child looking at your face and listening to the tone of your voice to discern if they are truly safe?
So how do you show up safe for your kids?
At Connected Families, we start with the question, “What’s going on in me?” and “What does my child see on my face in times of discipline?” When you are able to do this inner work, your calm demeanor toward your kids can be a true reflection of a peaceful heart, not just a contrived calm. Then you can have the emotional capacity to help your struggling child. This will help guide them toward wisdom, connection, and grace, with true compassion.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
how to work toward becoming truly calm on the inside, not just on the outsidepractical tools for the heat of the moment to help you regulate your nervous system (and then help your child regulate too!)the science of creating brain pathways that can help you respond better in future discipline situationsthe transforming power of the principles in the Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course, and the beautiful testimony of one mom’s parenting journey through the course
We hope that you have been helped by today’s podcast, and we look forward to getting to know you. Please check out our website, and don’t forget to reach out if you need help. It is a joy to be able to walk with you as you parent your kids in God’s grace and truth!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online courseFramework magnetConnected Families FrameworkMichael McKnightDo-oversBible verses: 2 Corinthians 10:5, Ephesians 2:10, Mark 6:34
In the Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course, you'll learn 4 key messages that all kids long to hear. You'll be equipped to move into frustrating moments of misbehavior to lead with grace, not fear or anger. Register today! The course begins on October 4th.
Kids and Misbehavior: Sin? Or Something Else?
Aug 29, 2022
[powerpress]
The Gospel in Our Parenting
Aug 22, 2022
What difference does the gospel make in our lives? In our parenting?
The message of God’s love communicates the unconditional truth that each of us has been made in the image of God. Our connection with Jesus brings hope and transformation to every area of our lives.
The love and grace of God is the source of everything we do at Connected Families. One of the things that sets us apart is that we work to make scripture practical for parents. The Bible is our sure foundation and the first resource we consider in our teaching.
Today’s podcast is the first of two podcasts about how the gospel informs the Connected Families Framework. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Connected Families Co-Founders Jim and Lynne Jackson to discuss how being a new creation in Christ can bring change into every part of our lives–including the everyday trials of parenting!
We can live rooted and grounded in Jesus and put our trust in Him instead of the outcomes we’re looking for with our children. We can build our identity as redeemed children of God, bestowed with every spiritual blessing and created for God’s purpose and design. This abundant life in Christ then pours out and blesses those around us, especially our children!
In this podcast:
In today’s podcast, you will discover how the gospel is infused into the first three levels of our Framework:
“You are SAFE with me.” Jesus is there to help you when you feel anxious or overwhelmed. He can help you explore, “What’s going on in me?” In Christ, you have the ability to be ok, even when your kids are not ok, because your identity is in Jesus.
“You are LOVED no matter what.” Neither you nor your child has to do something or change before Jesus loves you. Misbehavior is the golden opportunity to show unconditional love to your kids.
“You are CALLED and CAPABLE.” The deeper you are able to receive God's grace and truth for yourself, the more peace and confidence you can embrace as you coach your kids. God will partner with you as you help them grow in His purpose for their life.
Stay tuned for the second part of this podcast, "Kids and Misbehavior: Is it sin? Or something else?" as we continue the conversation about the gospel and the Connected Families Framework. You won’t want to miss the eye-opening discussion about the last level of the Framework, “You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions.” In the meantime check out our FREE resources!
Helpful resources mentioned in this podcast:
7 Practical Calming Strategies for Kids: The FREE Online Course
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart Online Course
Connected Families Framework
Scripture verses: 2 Corinthians 5:17, Romans 10:9, Ephesians 1 and 2, Ephesians 2:10, Ephesians 3:16-18, Psalm 139, Galatians 4:4-6, James 1, Romans 5:8, Luke 15:11-32
My Child Freaks Out Easily | Ep. 106
Aug 15, 2022
And what can I do to make it stop?
Navigating Compassion Fatigue
Jul 25, 2022
Not all families who have been formed through adoption have experienced what is discussed on this podcast. Regardless of how your family was formed, or the challenges you have in your home, there is a wide range of experiences when it comes to compassion fatigue.
If you’re struggling to feel joy and hope in your relationship with your child you might be feeling compassion fatigue. Especially if, for a variety of reasons, your child needs extra care and support. You love your child so much, but it can be hard to see the needs of your child when you feel emotionally overwhelmed and exhausted from trying to help them. Compassion fatigue is real, and it is more common than you might think.
In our decades of interacting with families, we have seen an increase in parents in need of hope and help in the midst of daily struggles. You can find hope today from a place of faith, instead of gritting, exhausting, self-effort. Whether your child is struggling with trauma, sensory issues, attachment, abuse, shame, or just the daily struggles of life, this episode is for you!
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward is joined by Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) and special guests David and Colleen Little, TBRI practitioners and founders of Imago Hearts. David and Colleen have extensive experience, both in the US and internationally, helping parents who are raising children with histories of abandonment, abuse, and neglect. They dig deep with us today and talk about the importance of understanding attachment, and of doing our own inner work as parents. Then, the grace and mercy of Jesus in our lives can overflow into our relationship with our child in safety, connection, and compassion.
You can experience hope and healing in your own heart, and bring that same hope to your struggling child as well. With God’s grace and help, you can look within to understand how your own history, wounds, and attachment have shown up in your life and in your parenting. Healing those wounds can lead to insight about yourself, and that leads to a deeper capacity to offer mercy and compassion to your child.
In today’s podcast, you’ll discover:
symptoms of compassion fatigue, and why you might be struggling with this
the vital role that attachment plays in the relational stress you’re experiencing with your child
practical steps to work through compassion fatigue and the importance of self-care
how to work through the first level of the Connected Families Framework (“You are SAFE with me.”) to gain insight into your own needs, and then to better meet the needs of your child
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
7 Practical Calming Strategies for Kids online mini-course (free!)
Imago Hearts ministry
Does Attachment Style Matter? (podcast with Milan and Kay Yerkovich)
Connected Families Framework
Connected Families free resources
Are you struggling with compassion fatigue? Perhaps feeling isolated? You were never meant to travel this path alone! Please reach out to us and let us know how we can help. We also have Certified Parent Coaches who are ready to help you one-on-one in your parenting journey. We look forward to connecting with you!
Guest Bio:
David and Colleen Little live in Prior Lake, Minnesota. They are qualified practitioner trainers of the Trust-Based Relational Intervention model taught by the Karyn Purvis Institute of Childhood Development at Texas Christian University. David and Colleen are also registered trainers of the Circle of Security Parenting intervention. Colleen has a master’s degree in Speech Therapy from Mankato State and David has a master’s degree in Early Childhood and Infant Mental Health from The University of Minnesota. Their ministry, imago hearts, focuses on helping parents who are raising children with histories of abandonment, abuse, and neglect. In addition to training and coaching parents in Minnesota, they have partnerships with NGOs in Ukraine, Russia, Belarus, Moldova, and Poland. You can find more information about David and Colleen on their website: imagohearts.org.
Do you have one really intense child? Or a couple? Almost every family in the Connected Families community has at least one child who is more sensitive and more intense than most other kids. Often what “worked” for your other kids doesn’t seem to “work” for this intense child! It’s a game-changer when you learn some new skills and can truly understand and empathize with that sensitive and intense child. Check out our newest FREE online mini-course, "7 Practical Calming Strategies for Kids". You'll be equipped with skills to help your sensitive and intense child navigate life. Register today!
Is Your Child a Rule Follower?
Jul 11, 2022
.stk-e5359fc{margin-bottom:19px !important}Do you sometimes worry about your child who is a rule follower? Wait, what?! Don’t we want kids who follow the rules?
Parents often express their concerns about their defiant child. But rule-following? That doesn’t seem like a bad thing! And yet, we would suggest that these types of children come with their own set of challenges.
Compliance can be viewed on a scale, from healthy to unhealthy. A child who is "easy" may actually be emotionally unhealthy and struggling to "speak the truth in love". In this podcast, we are focusing on the more unhealthy end of the spectrum. No matter where your child lands on this scale, you’ll find super helpful guidance here to build connection with your child.
In today’s podcast, Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) joins our host, Stacy Bellward, to peel back the layers of what might be going on under the surface of our rule-following children. These kids often give us a “break,” which seems to make things easier. But there is the risk of their identity being built around people-pleasing and suppressing their own needs. Over time and into adulthood, they might miss out on how to navigate conflict, and difficult emotions, and struggle with perfectionism as well.
When you get curious and patiently work to draw out your child’s true feelings, you can help them get to the bottom of underlying struggles, and teach them to recognize their own needs and emotions. You can help them find their voice in the world, and communicate to them that they are loved and valued.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
what healthy and unhealthy compliance looks like, and how to get in touch with what is going on under the surface in your childpractical ways to help you draw out your child and help them express their needs in a healthy wayhow the Connected Families Framework can help you navigate this process as you consider, “What’s going on in me as a parent?” and “What’s going on in my child?”the healing power of God’s grace to break cycles and overcome shame-based parenting
Mentioned in this podcast:
Got an Easy-Going, Compliant Child? Here's What You Need to Know.Sibling Conflict online courseDiscipline That Connects online course12 Misbehaviors and the Gifts-Gone-Awry Behind ThemConnected Families FrameworkParent Coaching Certification Program
In our online course, Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding, we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Join us! Your kids will thank you.
Should Dads Demand Respect?
Jun 20, 2022
Should dads demand respect?
Maybe this sounds familiar:
“No, I don’t want to!” “This is dumb, you’re unfair!” “Who cares if my homework isn’t done?!”
Hey dads, have you experienced this kind of pushback from your kids? It can push ALL your buttons when your child is disrespectful. This can make it especially hard to keep calm and respond with calm authority.
Although this is a struggle for almost all parents, it seems to be an especially challenging scenario for dads.
When our “respect buttons” get pushed, it’s tempting to grasp for control and command obedience. But in doing so, we might find ourselves sacrificing connection and true, heartfelt respect with our kids. You want to build connection and respect. So what can you do? How can you respond?
In today’s episode, Jim Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Parent Coach) have a heartfelt conversation about respect. When we engage with our kids in humility and curiosity instead of control, we model what respect looks like, and safely earn their respect and trust. Treating our children with respect helps us diffuse a tense situation, and paves the way for connection, conversation, and understanding.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
how you can initiate and model respect to your child–even when they are being disrespectful to youways you can unintentionally frustrate or exasperate your kids, and how to encourage your child towards true heart change–not just compliance practical ways to teach respect both in and outside of the moment or situationthe importance of asking foundational questions such as: “What’s going on in me as a parent?” “What lessons are my kids really learning by my actions?”
If you’ve struggled with teaching your child to be respectful we hope you’ve found practical wisdom in this podcast to guide you and your family in God’s grace and truth. Please check out our resources, and as always, your questions and thoughts are important to us. We would love to connect with you!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Ephesians 6:1-4Connected Families FrameworkDonate to Connected FamiliesSibling Conflict online courseWycliffe Hawai‘i Pidgin Bible translation
In our online course, Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding, we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Join us! Your kids will thank you.
How to Be a More Playful Parent
Jun 13, 2022
Sometimes parenting can feel like one big list of things you have to get done. It can be so hard to switch gears from the many demands of being a parent to having joyful and playful time with your kiddos!
Yet research shows that playfulness brings connection and communicates in a language that helps kids learn! Playful parenting is an important part of every level of the Connected Families Framework.
Intentional parent/child play can:
calm your child’s brain and yoursprovide opportunities to teach skillsenable problem-solving capabilityreach kids who are struggling communicate to your child, “I enjoy you!”
Sounds great, right? So how do we get there?
In this podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families, Occupational Therapist) and Joy Wendling (Connected Families Certified Parent Coach) to discuss the vital role that play contributes to a connected relationship between you and your kids. Tune in as they talk about how you can invite your kids to cooperate through play, and keep the long-term goal of connection, while also teaching important skills for the moment.
From both a scientific and a biblical standpoint, play is a vital part of speaking your child’s language. It is a pivotal way kids learn! The language of play creates an atmosphere of emotional safety where you can diffuse conflict and invite joy and connection.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
what the Bible says about play–it might surprise you!the brain science of why playful parenting creates connection and invites cooperationpractical ways to make it happen in everyday routines (like trying to get your kids out the door!)how to tune into your family’s unique personalities to discover what playful connection looks like
Has this podcast been helpful to you? If so, could you please rate and review so others can find us more easily? We want to share the message of hope and connection with as many parents as possible!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Joy Wendling: Created to PlayConnected Families FrameworkSibling Conflict online courseThe “Just Right Challenge”Bible verses: Ecclesiastes 11:8, Matthew 19:14, 2 Samuel 6, Zephaniah 3:17, John 15:15
Guest Bio
Joy Wendling is a wife, mama to 5 girls ages 1 - 9, and play advocate. She lives in the beautiful Pacific Northwest where she has served in children's, youth, and family ministries and in Christian Early Childhood Education. In 2016, she earned her Master's in Youth, Family, and Culture from Fuller Theological Seminary. Though her primary ministry is to her family now, she loves to serve other families through Connected Families Certified Parent Coaching, and her podcast Playfully Faithful Parenting. You can connect with Joy on her website createdtoplay.com, and on Instagram instagram.com/createdtoplay, and Facebook facebook.com/created2play. Or you can email her at joy@createdtoplay.com.
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Does Attachment Style Matter?
May 23, 2022
Your relationship with your child might feel “off,” but you’re not sure why. Could it be that the way you were parented impacts the way you parent? Your attachment style affects all your most important relationships - from spouse to children to close friends.
So, what is “attachment style” anyway? And does attachment style really matter?
Attachment tends to be a buzzword in parenting circles. Attachment Theory comes from scientific research about different ways that children securely bond (or lack bonding) with their parents in the child’s early years. Also, it shouldn't be confused with Attachment Parenting.
In a perfect world, a child experiences secure attachment when the parent-child relationship is built around emotional safety and stability from the parent.
But we don’t live in a perfect world.
Sometimes we (and our children) do not experience this kind of secure attachment. When we explore our family of origin, we learn how our own style of attachment affects how we respond in relationships, and it definitely affects how we parent our children!
On today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Jim Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) welcome guests Milan and Kay Yerkovich. Together, they dive into the significance of, and styles of, attachment and how we model them in our parenting. They are the authors of How We Love, and they discuss how we bring the attachment style from our parents to our own relationships, especially with our kids.
Learning about your attachment style is a key component of the first level of the Connected Families Framework and can help you understand, “What’s going on in me?”. Parents who have not experienced a secure connection — don’t lose hope! The good news is that attachment wounds from your past can be identified, and you can grow along with your kids. You can cultivate a secure, deep connection with your kids and transform your family for generations to come.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
the six attachment styles and how you can identify your own attachment style
how your attachment style passes on to your kids, and affects emotional regulation, sense of safety, and predictability in your home
the specific challenges of cultivating a secure attachment with kids who have experienced trauma, particularly kids who join your family through foster care or adoption
the importance of understanding your own attachment history without shame, and adopting a growth mindset to change the trajectory of your family’s legacy
We are so glad you’re here! Has this podcast been helpful? Could you please take a moment to rate and review this podcast, so others can find us more easily? Here’s what others are saying about our podcast!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
How We Love by Milan and Kay Yerkovich
How We Love Our Kids by Milan and Kay Yerkovich (includes “Seven gifts you can give your kids.”)
What is Your Love Style? Online quiz
Free resources from Milan and Kay Yerkovich: Comfort Circle: Guide for the Listener, Understanding Your Quiz Results
Grace and Truth for Moms online course
Connected Families Framework
ACEs scoring system
Bible verses: Psalm 139, James 1:19, 2 Cor 1:3-7, Psalm 23
Guest bios:
KAY YERKOVICH, M.S., M.F.T.
Kay is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She has a master’s degree in Marriage and Family Counseling and has been counseling people for over 30 years. She is a popular speaker and lecturer in the areas of parenting and marriage relationships. In her free time, Kay enjoys creative hobbies, ceramics, painting, and sewing. Taking a swim in the ocean is her favorite way to renew her energy.
REV. MILAN YERKOVICH, M.A.
Milan specializes in couples’ marriage counseling and is the founder and president of Relationship 180, a non-profit Christian counseling center specializing in the application of attachment research (www.relationship180.com). He has a master’s degree in Biblical Studies and has worked with marriages and families for over 40 years and is a Bible teacher and lecturer in the areas of relational theology, marriage, family, and parenting. He is a Co-Host of New Life Live! a nationally syndicated counseling show heard on over 180 radio stations, which can be seen on the NRB television network (www.newlife.com). He loves to row crew, swims and is a martial arts instructor.
TOGETHER:
They are the creators of Attachment Core Pattern Therapy (ACPT™), co-authored How We Love, How We Love Workbook, and How We Love Our Kids, and travel and speak extensively on relationships (www.howwelove.com). They were married in 1972 and have four grown children, two daughters-in-law, two sons-in-law, and ten grandchildren.
Ending the Shame Cycle
May 16, 2022
Are you hard on yourself as a parent? As a person? It’s so easy to get caught up in what feels like failure to us. We want so much to be good parents! Though it’s unintentional, we can project our own feelings of shame onto our kids. Then we feel even worse. Shame can be so destructive to us and to our relationships. What does ending the shame cycle look like?
If you have ever felt stuck in this kind of a cycle, please listen to this podcast. In this milestone podcast (our 100th episode!) we talk about a prevalent and powerful concept that has resounded with our Connected Families community for nearly 20 years: Moving forward from shame to the freedom of living in God’s grace and truth.
In this episode, Stacy Bellward is joined by Connected Families Co-Founders, Jim and Lynne Jackson. Together, they share the message that has transformed the lives of thousands of parents and families, and has provided the foundation for an enduring parenting framework. Modeling God’s grace and truth to our kids communicates that we are human, and that when we mess up there's an opportunity to bring God's very real mercy into any situation.
In this podcast:
Listen in today to learn about how to embrace and incorporate truth phrases into the messiness of daily life. Phrases such as:
“This is a moment for compassion for me, and for my kids.”
“Jesus gives me courage to face adversity and I will grow from this!”
“Everyone is still learning.”
“I can respond without ‘freaking out’.”
“Hope is the fuel for a growth mindset.”
Was there an encouraging statement in this podcast that resonated with you? Do you have your own hopeful-truth statement that has helped you? We’d love to hear it! Post it on your social media and tag us! FB: @ConnectedFamilies Insta: @connectedfams You will encourage other parents too!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Grace and Truth for Moms online course
Connected Families Framework
Bible verses: Psalm 3:3, 2 Corinthians 10:5, Ephesians 1,2, Romans 15:13, Philippians 4:8, 2 Peter 1:3
100 Truth Phrases To Keep You Going
Want a handy list of Truth Phrases to hang onto when life gets messy? Click HERE for a downloadable/printable PDF!
.stk-ca3392e,.stk-ca3392e .stk-button{width:100% !important}.stk-ca3392e{flex:1 1 0 !important}DOWNLOAD FREE PDF
How Can I Identify Anxiety in My Child?
May 02, 2022
Do you have a child who struggles with anxiety? It can be really hard to know how to help them! Anxiety can be a powerless feeling for both kids and adults. Kids especially do not have all the same tools or brain development as adults to know how to manage it well. They need help.
Add to this challenge that sometimes anxiety doesn’t even look like anxiety. Anxiety can be masked by a variety of emotions and behaviors. It can even present itself as defiance! What do you do then? As a parent, your heart is for your child. They need your help and you want to help, but what can you do? Listen in, because this episode has insight and helpful tools you can use today.
Today’s episode is the second part in a two-part series about identifying and navigating anxiety. Last week we discussed how to identify anxiety in us as parents. (If you missed it, listen here!) Today we are diving into how to help our kids with their anxiety. Stacy Bellward is again joined by three experienced Connected Families Parent Coaches, Katie Wetsell, Marni Love, and Taylor Irby. Together they talk about the science of anxiety, how to distinguish it from other emotions, and how you can support your child through their anxious feelings.
As adults, we can be advocates and coaches for anxious children whether in our home, school, church, or the community around us. We can get curious about what is going on in kids to determine if they are experiencing anxiety, and come alongside them with empathy, compassion, and helpful tools that bring connection.
In today’s podcast, you’ll discover:
insights to help you discern between your child’s anxiety, defiance, and other difficult emotionspractical ways you can partner with (coach) your kids to bring lasting transformation from a place of safety and connectiona tool called OARS to help you communicate using empathy and support the importance of your own foundational work as a parent to avoid bringing your own anxiety into tense situations
We are so glad you’re here! Has this podcast been helpful? Could you please take a moment to rate and review this podcast, so others can find us more easily? Simply click on this link, and click “Listen on Apple Podcasts,” then click on “Ratings and Reviews” in the itunes pop-up. Or, use your Apple Podcast app on your phone! We love to bring you practical insights and biblical wisdom to help you in your parenting journey. Let us know how we can help!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families FrameworkGrace and Truth for Moms online courseWindow of Tolerance: Dr Dan Siegel4 Steps to Change Your Child’s Behavior and the “Just Right Challenge”OARS techniquePsalm 73
Guest bios:
Katie Wetsell has always had a calling on her heart to care for children. She has worked as a pediatric oncology nurse and pediatric nurse practitioner. After experiencing the benefits of parent coaching through Connected Families herself, Katie later resigned from nursing and became a Certified Parent Coach as well. She and her husband have four children (three boys and a girl) through birth and adoption. Katie is also trained in SPACE treatment to help parents learn how to support their children struggling with anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorders. You can learn more about Katie at parentwithhope.org, and on Facebook @parentwithhopecoach and Instagram @parentwithhopecoach
Marni Love is a wife, homeschool mom to three growing boys, tutor, and parenting coach. After teaching in public school for many years she felt called to home educate. She started in preschool and has continued through the high school years. She has a heart for helping families enjoy their journey and parent with grace while also preparing their children for the future God has for them. She has experience with adoption, ADHD, sensory processing, primitive reflex integration and highly sensitive children. It would be her great pleasure to support you in bringing peace and connection to your home. You can connect with Marni at www.marnilove.com and on Instagram @journeywithlovehomeschool
Taylor Irby is a mother to 5 kids, and she understands the struggles parents face. Every day she faces ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays and adoption trauma. She too has sat in the trenches and searched the world for answers. Taylor read book after book and got excited over methods that were short lived. That is where she hit the wall of desperation and sought parent coaching through Connected Families. Taylor ultimately became a coach through their training program to help others like her. She has seen transformation in her home through working with a framework that not only has changed her children’s behavior, but their hearts as well. You are not alone on this parenting journey. There is hope and you can enjoy your children, building that relationship you have wanted and see behavior change. And I'm here to help. You can learn more about Taylor at taylorirbycoaching.com, and on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/taylor.irby.5 and Instagram @taylorirbycoaching
Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child.
Can I Parent Well When I'm Anxious?
Apr 25, 2022
You can feel the rising tension in your shoulders and the knots in your stomach again. So much going on around you, and inside you. There is no shortage of things to feel anxious about in our world right now! Current data reveals a huge spike in anxiety in recent years, for both parents and kids. We all face anxiety at some point and it can cause a range of emotions, from mild frustration to feeling really helpless. But can you parent well when you're anxious?
Anxiety can show up in big ways in our lives and in our family, but it can also show up in subtle ways that are masked by other emotions and behaviors. This is why it is SO important to routinely pay attention to the most foundational question, “What is going on in ME?”
Today’s podcast episode is absolutely packed with thoughtful and real-life guidance for how we can understand and navigate parental anxiety. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) invites three Connected Families Parent Coaches to an honest and insightful conversation about how they have encountered and managed anxiety in many different forms and situations in their own lives and in their kids’ lives as well:
Marni Love, is a homeschool mom of three boys and a regular guest in our Clubhouse Community. Marni has experience with adoption, ADHD, sensory processing, primitive reflex integration, and highly sensitive children
Taylor Irby, is a speaker, marriage and parenting coach, and mom of five children. Taylor is familiar with the challenges of ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays, and adoption trauma
Katie Wetsell, is a mom of four kids and a pediatric nurse who has personally navigated issues related to adoption, mental illness, and learning disabilities. Katie is also certified in SPACE Treatment, a parent-based approach for helping children with anxiety, anxiety disorders, and OCD
Join these fellow moms and learn how anxiety can actually be an opportunity to grow in our faith, to better understand ourselves and our kids, and to love each other well as a family. We can be proactive in taking care of ourselves and staying grounded in God’s grace and truth so that we can flourish as God's dearly beloved children.
What you’ll discover in today’s podcast:
how anxiety might show up in your home masked as different emotions, behavior, and actions
a clinical definition of anxiety, and how it functions to alert us in both healthy and unhealthy ways
the difference between anxiety and fear, and how we can discern and respond
practical strategies and important truths to help you work through anxious feelings
Do you or your kids struggle with anxiety? Is there something in today’s podcast you found helpful? We would really love to hear from you and help you navigate these challenges. We invite you to check out the valuable resources on our website, and share them with a friend who needs them too!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Bible verses: Psalm 23, 2 Corinthians 10:5, Deuteronomy 6:5
Grace and Truth for Moms online course
Trash, Truth, Treasure (podcast)
Hurtful Comments: Teach Your Child How to Process and Grow
Window of Tolerance: Dr. Dan Siegel
Atlas of the Heart by Brene Brown
Guest Bios:
Katie Wetsell has always had a calling on her heart to care for children. She has worked as a pediatric oncology nurse and pediatric nurse practitioner. After experiencing the benefits of parent coaching through Connected Families herself, Katie later resigned from nursing and became a Certified Parent Coach as well. She and her husband have four children (three boys and a girl) through birth and adoption. Katie is also trained in SPACE treatment to help parents learn how to support their children struggling with anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorders. You can learn more about Katie at parentwithhope.org, and on Facebook @parentwithhopecoach and Instagram @parentwithhopecoach
Marni Love is a wife, homeschool mom to three growing boys, tutor, and parenting coach. After teaching in public school for many years she felt called to home educate. She started in preschool and has continued through the high school years. She has a heart for helping families enjoy their journey and parent with grace while also preparing their children for the future God has for them. She has experience with adoption, ADHD, sensory processing, primitive reflex integration, and highly sensitive children. It would be her great pleasure to support you in bringing peace and connection to your home. You can connect with Marni at www.marnilove.com and on Instagram @journeywithlovehomeschool
Taylor Irby is a mother to 5 kids, and she understands the struggles parents face. Every day she faces ADHD, autism, anxiety, developmental delays, and adoption trauma. She too has sat in the trenches and searched the world for answers. Taylor read book after book and got excited over methods that were short-lived. That is when she hit the wall of desperation and sought parent coaching through Connected Families. Taylor ultimately became a coach through their training program to help others like her. She has seen transformation in her home through working with a framework that not only has changed her children’s behavior but their hearts as well. You are not alone on this parenting journey. There is hope and you can enjoy your children, building that relationship you have wanted, and see behavior change. And I'm here to help. You can learn more about Taylor at taylorirbycoaching.com, and on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/taylor.irby.5 and Instagram @taylorirbycoaching
Teaching Your Child to Navigate "Mean" Kids
Apr 18, 2022
“He called me stupid!” “She said she doesn’t want to play with me!” It’s so hard when your child comes to you feeling hurt by someone else’s words. Words matter. And they hurt! You want to comfort your kids and protect them from bullying and being hurt again, but unfortunately, that isn’t realistic. How can you teach your child to navigate life when kids say things that are mean? Or when there may be bullying involved?
The truth is, we (both our kids and we as parents) are bombarded with all kinds of negative messages that can be hurtful, and bruise our identity and sense of self-worth. Whether it’s from other people, the culture around us, or even our own inner critic, we hear things that hurt. Sometimes it’s hard to work through it all. We can feel tempted to ruminate and rehearse in our mind the unkind or critical words we hear.
So what can we do to help ourselves and our kids?
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward is joined by Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) to share with us a super helpful tool Lynne developed to combat the damage of hurtful words and messages. It’s called Trash, Truth, Treasure, and like all of our Connected Families resources, this tool is grounded in biblical truth and based on brain science.
The principles of Trash, Truth, Treasure can help us in tough moments to discern what we believe about ourselves, about God, and about our kids. It will allow God’s encouragement to flood us with truth and love. Using this tool as a helpful guide, you can learn to untangle negative, critical messages in your own heart, and help your children to do the same.
.stk-f4f491c {background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-4, #1e3f52) !important;}.stk-f4f491c:before{background-color:var(--theme-palette-color-4, #1e3f52) !important;}Download this helpful PDF "Trash, Truth, Treasure"
In today’s podcast, you’ll learn:
practical ways to identify: What messages are coming into my mind, and how are they affecting me and informing my identity?
how you can renew your mind, and do the inner Foundational work by asking, “What’s going on in me?”
the science of how your brain processes negative messages, and what you can do to work through these messages with objectivity and grace
practical examples of how to help both young kids and older ones work through the tool of Trash, Truth, Treasure
How have you applied this tool in your family? Has it been helpful to you? We’d love to hear more about your experience, and how we can come alongside you to help you parent with truth and grace. Please check out and share our resources with a friend, and if you have any questions, we’d love to hear from you!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Hurtful Comments: Teach Your Child How to Process and Grow (article by Lynne Jackson)
I Was a Critical Parent: 7 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving Way
Grace and Truth for Moms online course
Connected Families Framework
Dr. Caroline Leaf
Bible verses: Philippians 1:9-10, Romans 12:2, John 8:42-44, John 10:10, Proverbs 26:2
Doctrine of Grace in Parenting | Ep. 96
Apr 11, 2022
What does the Bible really say about parenting? Is there such a thing as a Doctrine of Grace in Parenting? As Christian parents, we depend on the Bible as a necessary guide to help us understand God’s direction in both discipling and disciplining our kids. And yet, there’s not a significant number of verses in the Bible that give specific parenting instructions.
What we do know is that the Bible tells us that God calls us to love our children the way He loves us, to live out the Fruit of the Spirit, and to pour out the same grace to our kids that we receive from Him. God can empower us through His Spirit to parent with the same gentleness and peace He offers to us.
In today’s episode, Jim Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) is joined by Dr. David Erickson to discuss the Doctrine of Grace in Parenting. Or, more specifically, a biblical foundation for gentle, grace-filled parenting. Dr. Erickson is a theology professor, and has also served as a preacher and pastor for over 25 years. He and his wife Amanda are the founders of Flourishing Homes and Families, a ministry dedicated to cultivating peace-filled and healthy homes.
You’ll want to listen in as Dr. Erickson discusses how the work of God in us can produce gentleness and a renewed mind, so that we can love others–especially our children–as God loves us. We can live out Jesus’ grace-filled spirit in all areas of our life, including our parenting.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
how important biblical principles and teachings can apply to your parenting the big picture goal of obedience, based on trust and connectionthe empowering messages of the Connected Families Frameworka clear and powerful pathway of how we can live out the embodied work of Jesus with our children
Want to learn more about grace-filled parenting? Please go to our Connected Families website, and check out great free resources and helpful podcasts with hope-filled wisdom for your parenting journey. Have questions or want to connect? You can contact us, we look forward to hearing from you!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Flourishing Homes and FamiliesHelping Kids with Anger (FREE ebook)Connected Families FrameworkBible verses: Sermon on the Mount, Ephesians 4, Ephesians 6:4, Galatians 5
Guest Bio:
Dr. David Erickson is currently a Professor of Theological-Historical Studies, and is passionate about helping people fall radically and deeply in love with God and His word. He also pursued that calling for more than 25 years as a preacher and pastor. David is committed to helping parents understand what God says about parenting and how parenting practices reflect a person’s underlying beliefs about God.
David and Amanda teach parents all over the world through their ministry, Flourishing Homes and Families. With practical parenting advice and regular theology applied to parenting, they are working to equip and empower parents to live out in parenting the very real grace they’ve been given by Jesus. David and Amanda have been married 17 years, have two boys, and currently reside in East Texas.
What Do Kids Really Need From Us?
Mar 21, 2022
Sometimes we get anxious about our kids’ challenges and focus more on their behavior, which can cause further strain on the relationship. Consider this: What we see on the surface in our kids and teens doesn’t always reflect what’s really going on in their hearts.
Today’s episode is a special and unique conversation. Join Jim Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) as he interviews Michelle Livingston Thorstad (speaker, mentor, and biblical counselor). Learn about Michelle’s work with at-risk youth, the trials in her own parenting, and the hope that gave her a renewed sense of God’s love and grace for her and her kids. This conversation is about the relational transformation that takes place in a connected relationship. Sharing hope with your kids is relational. It’s hearing and understanding what your kids need, whether they express it with or without words.
In this episode...you’ll learn about what our kids really need from us.
Things like:
-relationship over behavior management. You’re more likely to have influence and to be able speak into your kids’ lives when they feel a safe and connected relationship with you.
-a safe place to land when they share things with you (body language is important too!). The way you respond can either invite more conversation and influence, or cause hesitancy in your kids about future conversations.
-your humility. Your mistakes can be a beautiful opportunity for them to learn that you struggle too. Kids don’t feel so alone when they know they are not the only ones who make mistakes.
-your physical presence. Being in physical proximity provides a space where organic, meaningful conversations can happen.
Mentioned in this podcast:
-Michelle Livingston Thorstad: https://michellelivingston.org/
-TreeHouse
-Center for Transformation and Training
-Connected Families FREE ebook: Helping Kids with Anger
-Ed Stetzer
-Proverbs 22:6
Why Do I Feel So Angry?
Mar 14, 2022
On today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (Connected Families Co-Founders) to address how parents handle their own anger, and how we can model this in a healthy way to our kids. We discuss brain science relating to anger, a biblical perspective and, as always, practical tools to help you and your kids. You can learn an approach to anger that leaves shame behind, brings connection with your child, and becomes an opportunity for grace and growth. You can break generational cycles of unhealthy anger and bring life and healing to your relationship with your child.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
-the brain science of anger as a default reaction and a reactive coping mechanism, and how you can respond in faith instead of fear
-triggers and thought patterns that affect behavior, and how anger can sometimes diminish what may be underlying anxiety or even trauma
-the importance of knowing your identity as a child of God, and looking beneath the surface of anger by asking, “What’s going on in me?”
-the top three things that push parents’ buttons, and some practical ways of responding in these situations
Mentioned in this podcast:
-Helping Kids with Anger FREE ebook
-What It Really Means to Be Triggered (Healthline article)
-Connected Families Framework
-Bible verses: Matthew 16:22-24, Philippians 4:6-7, Philippians 1:4-6, Galatians 5:22-23
Want to learn more?
-Helping Kids with Their Anger
-Anger: Is it Good, Bad, or Ugly?
Help! Homeschooling is Overwhelming
Mar 07, 2022
Do you feel overwhelmed as a homeschool parent? Many parents in the Connected Families community homeschool. That number has grown even more since 2020. Homeschooling can bring some unique parenting challenges! From sibling conflict to curriculum choices to intense learning needs, how do you stay connected to your kids, accomplish schoolwork, and maintain sanity?
(Even if you are not currently homeschooling, you’ll find helpful parenting guidance in this episode!)
On today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by three homeschooling moms with a wide range of perspectives and experiences. They each share a different story and various challenges they have encountered in their homeschooling journey. They also share the common thread of approaching life through the powerful lens of the Connected Families Framework.
In this podcast, you’ll learn about:
-what homeschool overwhelm can look like in different situations, and helpful ways you can approach it
-how to help kids learn to resolve sibling conflict, especially when they are with each other all day
-healthy ways to step back and ask, “What's going on in me? In my child?” and move forward with your child as a team
-the joy of embracing your child’s individual gifts and learning interests, and how you can help them grow in these areas
Mentioned in this podcast:
Helping Kids with Anger (FREE ebook): https://connectedfamilies.org/resources/angry-child-ebook/
Sibling Conflict online course: https://connectedfamilies.org/courses/sibling-conflict/
Join the Connected Families Clubhouse Community! : https://connectedfamilies.org/resources/clubhouse/
Verses mentioned: Romans 8:28, Philippians 1:4-6
Want to learn more?
60 Creative Ways to Get Kids Moving and Laughing
https://connectedfamilies.org/resources/60-ways-moving-laughing/
How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids
https://connectedfamilies.org/how-to-create-a-simple-sensory-diet-for-restless-homebound-kids/
Connecting in Your Marriage
Feb 20, 2022
Building a connected marriage is hard work and it doesn’t always come easily. You want to bring better alignment between you and your spouse and create an environment of love, grace, and emotional safety. But you also might feel stuck in a cycle of negative thinking about your spouse or your marriage. Or maybe you are struggling to find a way to navigate disagreements. Connecting in your marriage can be challenging!
The Connected Families Framework equips parents to become more safe and connected, but this Framework is not just for parenting! There are many similarities in the parenting framework that are a natural crossover in marriage. It’s a framework you can successfully apply to all of your relationships, including marriage.
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by special guests and marriage experts Jeff and Stacy Kemp. Jeff and his wife Stacy are speakers with the Family Life Today Weekend to Remember marriage conference. Jeff is also a former NFL player and author of Facing the Blitz. Join them in this honest and encouraging conversation about the value of celebrating each other’s strengths. You’ll enjoy learning from real life examples what emotional safety in marriage can look like, and the daily living out of the Foundational question, “What’s going on in me?”
When you bring unconditional love and safety to your marriage, you can find the best in each other, receive and offer grace, and find lasting and meaningful connection.*
In this episode, you’ll discover:
practical and powerful ways to apply the Connected Families Framework in your marriage relationshipan approach that helps you focus on the positives and strengths in your spouse, and how it can bring change in your own heart and connection in your marriagethe power of being able to repair relationships after emotionally hurtful conversationshow to create an environment where it is safe to be transparent, so you can share your thoughts, feelings, and hurts with your spouse
*Connected Families believes that commitment to your marriage is an important aspect of emotional safety and connection, but when physical or emotional abuse is present, then help is needed and different options may need to be considered.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Jeff Kemp TeamFacing the Blitz by Jeff KempFamily Life–Weekend to Remember
How Can I Better Parent My Adult Children?
Feb 14, 2022
How do you parent your child who is now an adult? What does parenting look like when your child is preparing to launch into adulthood, living away from home, or getting married? You want to remain connected and continue to build trust, but it can also feel scary to watch your adult children make bigger decisions that might have bigger consequences.
You wonder if you did enough, if you taught them enough. Maybe you are even struggling with regret over what you wish could have been done differently. We get SO many requests to tackle this topic, and we are doing that today! Read on and listen in. You will be equipped with solid guidance and practical tips to help you navigate this changing season of parenting.
Chad Hayenga (Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Parent Coach) and Connected Families Certified Coaches Becky Wood and Dijea Young join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) on today’s podcast. These guests bring years of rich parenting experiences to the conversation, and offer real life insights into the changes, challenges, and blessings of parenting an adult child.
Whether your child is 8, 18, or 28, the Connected Families Framework offers a relevant and thoughtful approach to keep you growing in a connected relationship with your adult child. When you step back and offer a supportive and mentoring role in your adult child’s life, you can communicate enduring messages of emotional safety, unconditional love, and meaningful connection that build strong relationships.
In this episode, you’ll learn:
how to apply the Connected Families Framework and communicate the four messages with adult children ways to maintain connection with an adult child that nurture their independence while gaining trust and influence (Luke 2:52)the enduring legacy of the foundational question, “What’s going on in me as a parent?” even through your child’s adult yearshow to graciously build trust and connection with your adult child while working through the pain of your own past regrets
Want to learn more?
Connected Families FrameworkKeep Calm and Stay Connected (to your teen!) (blog post)Scared to Launch Your Child Into the “Real World”? (blog post)
We’re so glad you’re here! We would love to continue to reach as many people as possible with the message of God’s love and connection. Would you help us? You can rate this podcast, write a review, and subscribe! You are an integral part of the Connected Families community, and you make this all possible. Need help? Please contact us, we are here to walk alongside you.
Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox:
A Powerful New Perspective for Your Parenting
Jan 24, 2022
What do you think of when you hear the word discipline? Maybe it’s just to get your child to behave. Or bring peace to the chaos and gain some control as a parent. This is a totally natural parenting impulse! But what if there is a powerful new perspective for parenting to consider? A different way of viewing your parenting goals during moments of misbehavior that will open the door to connection and wisdom?
Oftentimes, as parents, we want the short-term fix that brings order to the situation. But in doing so, we might actually miss the opportunity to build something deeper and lasting.
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Parent Coach) to share with you a few practical shifts that could change not only your parenting perspective but, ultimately, your relationship with your child.
When you lean into connection and mentoring opportunities during discipline, you can build strength, connection, and respect between you and your child in those difficult moments. You can shift from managing behavior to building something intentional and purposeful for both you and your child. And in every step of the process, Jesus provides the grace and safety that you can receive and then pass on to your child.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
4 main shifts you can make to turn discipline situations into opportunities for growth and connectionhow the shift from managing to mentoring empowers your struggling childwhy meaningful discipline always begins with the foundation of: “What’s going on in me as a parent?”practical ways to highlight and nurture your child’s identity, and focus on the gifts God is growing in their life
Mentioned in this podcast:
Scriptures mentioned: Peter’s denial of Jesus, Peter jumping out of the boat, Jesus’ statement to Peter about building the church, Hebrews 12:11Connected Families Framework4 Ideas to Build a Growth Mindset as a Family (blog post)What Is the Goal of Your Discipline? (blog post)Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online course
What are your parenting goals? Did you find something helpful in this podcast? Looking for more great resources to help you with your parenting goals? Check out our blog, it’s packed with great information and parenting tips. As always, feel free to contact us, we’d love to hear from you!
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
Encourage Kids Who"Just Don't Care!"
Jan 17, 2022
Does it feel like your child just doesn’t care? Maybe even saying the words, “I just don’t care!”
Does your child seem unmotivated in school, defensive about doing chores, maybe even withdrawn and depressed? It is so hard to know what to do when your child is discouraged. You may feel frustrated and hopeless. And a kid who doesn’t seem to care can really push all your buttons, which can cause even more anxiety in both you and your child.
You want to know what is going on with your discouraged child! And you especially want to know how you can help (or, let’s be honest, “fix”) them. If this resonates, we have some fresh perspective and direction for you here today.
On today’s podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (Co-founders of Connected Families) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to help you see this behavior through a different lens. A lens that offers hope, and practical ways to support your struggling child.
Did you know that when your child feels pressure or discouragement, it can surface as misbehavior? But with the power of connection, and a gentle,non-judgmental spirit, this can be an opportunity to help your child grow in resilience and wisdom.
Using the Connected Families Framework, you can help your discouraged child feel loved and understood. You can come alongside them with encouragement and gentle questions to help them feel called and capable, and build an identity of wisdom and responsibility.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
what might be going on under the surface of a kid who doesn’t seem to carea practical and gentle approach to asking your child the kinds of questions that help them connect to what’s going on insidethe importance of replacing panic about your child’s future with empathy and solution-focused conversationshow to build your child’s God-given identity, and a value for responsibility, by instilling the confidence that God and you are with them, and for them.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families FrameworkRomans 15:13Applying the ABC’s of AffirmationDiscipline The Connects Online Course
Are you struggling to help your discouraged child? What tips from today’s podcast helped you? We’d love to hear your comments! As always, we are here if you need further help. Please contact us, and in the meantime, check out our helpful resources on our new website. We are in this together!
Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child.
Be Intentional in Your Parenting
Jan 10, 2022
What do you do when you know you want something to be different in your family this year? Do you ever wonder if there is a more gracious and meaningful way to approach the new year, for you and your kids? How can you be more intentional in your parenting in the new year?
If you are overwhelmed with all that hasn’t worked, and are looking for something different for your family, this is the podcast to help you gently usher in 2022 with hope for real and meaningful growth.
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) share a super practical tool, and a new perspective on creating goals and intentions for the new year. Not just worn-out resolutions, but a broader vision that could transform both you and your family one step and one day at a time. You can help your kids steward their time and their capabilities to create a growth mindset* with gracious questions such as:
What is your goal?Why is it important to you?What will it take to achieve your goal?To achieve your goal, what steps can you control?
You can create a safe and connected atmosphere to have a vision-casting conversation with your kids, and invite God to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine!
*Growth mindset is a term originally coined by Child Psychologist Carol Dweck and popularized by numerous authors. Our use of the term is most closely informed by her work.
In this podcast, you’ll also discover:
how to use a "life/growth wheel" (mentioned by Stacy) in practical ways, with kids of all ages, to coach and support your kids in building wisdom and responsibilitythe importance of assessing your (and your child’s) connection to God, to each other, and to your purpose in this world as you explore: What do I want life to look like a year from now?the power of celebration in connecting with your child and building momentum for their successhelpful steps to avoid the pitfalls that can bring shame and tension in conversations with your kids about their goals
Mentioned in this podcast:
Ephesians 3:14-21Susie Larson (Author, Speaker)The Entitlement Fix (online course)The Power of Questions (online course)Discipline That Connects (online course)Is There “Miracle Grow” for Good Behavior? (the ABC’s of Affirmation)
Do you and your family have goals for the new year? What did you find helpful in this podcast? We’d love to hear from you and connect with you as we all start a new year together! Leave a comment and let us know. Or contact us, we are here to help!
2022 Year-End Wrap-Up
Dec 20, 2021
What does God have in store for Connected Families in 2022?
My Child Never Sleeps
Dec 13, 2021
Finding peace and connection at bedtime
Want to Build Connection in Your Family?
Dec 06, 2021
As parents we long to build a connected family. Connection. We all long for genuine, connected relationships. It’s how God wired us. It makes sense that, when this element is lacking in our relationships, it can cause us to feel so many difficult and discouraged emotions. Especially in the relationships we value most. You want to feel connected to your kids and to the people you care about, but that can be really hard.
Is there a secret to authentic connection? A tool to help build a connected family? Your family can experience this!
Co-Founders Jim and Lynne Jackson wrestled and prayed about these very questions, and in the process laid an important foundation for the heart of Connected Families. They discovered that connection is intentional and it exists in three key areas:
connection to Godconnection to each otherconnection to our purpose in this world
In today’s podcast, Jim and Lynne join Stacy Belward (podcast host) to uncover what these three areas of connection mean, and how we can live them out with love and intention to build a connected family.
Connection doesn’t come from a magic wand; it happens in intentional and thoughtful relationships as we give and receive in meaningful ways. We connect by knowing, loving, and enjoying God and each other. God created you for connection. His love and grace can pour in and through you to purposefully build a connected family.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
intentional, meaningful, and practical ways to connect to God, each other, and your (and your kids!) purpose in this worldthe power of thoughtful and curious questions to connect to your child and help them grow in wisdomhow to help your kids connect with each other as siblingseffective ways to call out your child’s gifting, and help them find ways of using those gifts to be a blessing to others
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families FrameworkThe Big 5 Bible StudyThe Power of Questions online courseSibling Conflict online courseDonate to Connected FamiliesThe Love Language QuizMatthew 25:34-40
Looking for ways to connect more with your kids? Check out these fantastic resources to help you feel encouraged and equipped in your parenting! Feeling stuck? As always, please contact us to let us know how we can help you and walk alongside you in your parenting journey. We are here to help!
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
Applying the ABC's of Affirmation
Nov 29, 2021
Does your child get discouraged? Does it feel like your child’s misbehavior seems to drown out the positive things you might notice? And the more you notice misbehavior, the more it seems to happen. We tend to gravitate toward the things we feel need “fixing” in our kids, because our brains prioritize attending to anything wrong or threatening. This is normal!
As a parent you care deeply about your child and want them to grow in wisdom and responsibility, which doesn’t always come naturally! But you can learn to shine a bright spot in a really effective way, on the small things that go well, and begin to unravel this cycle of discouragement in your child. And it will bring encouragement to you as a parent, too!
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Lynne Jackson (Co-Founder of Connected Families) to share a powerful and practical tool to encourage both you and your child!
Lynne struggled with being hard on herself for being negative and critical. The negative self-talk was spilling over as a critical spirit in her parenting, and it was a challenging but rich journey to become more positive and affirming toward her kids. To speak encouraging truth into her kids Lynne developed a simple, useful, and memorable tool called the ABCs of Affirmation. It’s not a performance based, pat-on-the-back method. But it IS a Spirit-filled, life-giving tool that builds wisdom and affirms your child’s identity as a precious and beloved child of God.
The ABC’s of Affirmation provide a way for you to receive God’s grace, and then to pour out that grace to your children. When your kids see you receive encouragement from God and others, you can model and pass on the power of genuine, loving affirmation to them.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
the ABC’s of Affirmation: What they are, and how to incorporate this tool in everyday life in practical wayshow brain science matches and supports this biblical toolthe negative impacts of too much “shallow” praise for your childways to grow momentum (and even boost dopamine!) by encouraging yourself as a parenthow to ask your child thoughtful questions that lead them to self-encourage too!
Mentioned in this podcast:
I Was a Critical Parent: 7 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving WayIs There “Miracle Grow” for Good Behavior? (The ABC’s of Affirmation) Grace and Truth For Moms (online course) Connected Families FrameworkHow Your Thoughts Change Your Brain, Cells and GenesCorrie Thetford, Lydia Rex (Certified Connected FamiliesParent Coaches)Dr. Alan KazdinConnected Families Insiders TeamBible verses in this podcast: Philippians 4:8, 2 Corinthians 10:5, 1 Thessalonians 4:9, 1 Thessalonians 5:11
How have you used the ABC’s of Affirmation with your kids? We’d love to hear your stories! And don’t forget to check out our new website to encourage yourself and your family with these great resources! Need more encouragement or help? Please contact us, we are here for you!
Joe and Becky's Story
Nov 22, 2021
Creating a culture of safety in your home
An Honest Conversation About Adoption
Nov 15, 2021
Many of the families in the Connected Families community were formed through adoption. This month, during National Adoption Awareness Month, we look more closely at how the Connected Families Framework can be applied to children who joined their family through adoption (or foster care).
Whether or not you’ve adopted, you will not want to miss this podcast!
Note: In this podcast we are sharing the perspective of three internationally adopted transracial families. We recognize there are many different ways adoptive families are formed.
Kids who have entered our families through adoption have experienced trauma. This is an honest conversation about adoption, but the truth is that all kids have experienced some level of trauma. The good news is, a trauma-informed approach to parenting is a key element of the Connected Families Framework.
Maybe you have searched and sifted through an overload of parenting advice that has made you even more discouraged. You may have even thought, “Sounds like good advice….for a more ‘normal’ family.” But your family is unique and special, which is exactly how God intended it to be. Be encouraged! You can reach your child in powerful and practical ways.
In today’s podcast, three moms on the Connected Families team join together to have an honest and heart-to-heart conversation about some of the ways adoption and trauma have impacted their parenting. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Anna Braasch (Executive Director) and Jen Berge (Content Manager) to discuss how the Connected Families Framework provides a profound and gracious approach to trauma-informed parenting.
The Connected Families Framework gives a unique perspective for parenting kids from trauma. It offers the tools to navigate different parenting situations across the board. Our Framework provides an approach to connected parenting that communicates to your child--God can redeem all things!
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
how certain words surrounding adoption can bring hurt or discomfort, and how you can bring words of healing and compassion instead
the science of how trauma affects the body, and how it manifests in a child’s emotions, attachment, and daily living
the vital importance of safety and connection for kids in a chronically heightened state of fight-or-flight, and how your parenting can set the stage for connection in the midst of it
the four levels of the Connected Families Framework, and how they play out both emotionally and practically in trauma-informed parenting
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Framework
The History of “Putting a Child Up” for Adoption
Orphan Train (book)
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma (book)
Connected Families Insiders Team
A New Serenity Prayer
Bios:
Stacy Bellward is the Connected Families Project Manager. She has been married for over 20 years and is a mom of two daughters: One biological and one through adoption from Ethiopia. Stacy loves to be the cheerleader in the Connected Families online courses. She is also an author, speaker, and certified leadership coach. But most of all, Stacy is soaking up all the moments of motherhood, knowing time passes so quickly.
Jen Berge is the Content Manager for Connected Families. Jen has been married for over twenty years and has six children ranging in ages from 12-21: four biological, and two added through adoption from Haiti. Jen loves her big family and in her not-so-abundant “free time” she enjoys exercising, attending sporting events, and spending time as a family.
Anna Braasch is the Connected Families Executive Director. Anna loves to encourage parents who are struggling. She has experienced infertility, adoption, attachment struggles, and loads of grace and healing. Anna has been married for 25 years and has two kids through adoption from Ethiopia, who are now teenagers. Anna and her family are involved with sports, school events, their church, and the Ethiopian adoption community.
Why Changing Your Parenting Is So Hard
Oct 25, 2021
Why is changing your parenting just so hard?
You’ve tried everything to get a better result in your parenting: You’ve read the books, watched the seminars, tried new methods. You know that you want a different approach to your parenting, but you just don’t know what to do or how to do it. And it’s hard!
It’s messy to rewire old patterns that have been established over many years. This is true for everyone--you are not alone! We can be tempted to give up when a new strategy doesn’t bring the instant change we think we should be getting. But there is a way forward to lasting change--to a more peaceful and connected relationship with your kids! This podcast will give you the inspiration and the practical tools to navigate the “messy” as you work through new patterns of parenting and become a vessel for God’s grace and truth to your kids.
Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss how you can move toward healthier ways of responding to your kids that will bring connection, teach wisdom, and invite lasting change. In the unfailing love and strength of Jesus, you can create new patterns in your family systems that change the trajectory of your family for generations to come! It’s not easy, but there is so much good on the other side!
In this podcast you’ll learn:
why you hold tight to familiar, unwritten family rules, and how they affect your family dynamicsthe key to changing parenting reactions that get the results you want in the moment, but cost you relationally in the long termhow to recognize big emotions and use the Connected Families Framework to ask yourself, “What’s going on in me?” why kids can become more intense as they learn a new way of connection (even if it’s a good change!) and practical tools to help you navigate the process
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families websiteThe Key to Unlocking Wisdom and Responsibility in Kids (connection before correction)! Power of Questions online courseBible verses: 2 Corinthians 10:5, Romans 12:2
Is Mom Guilt Good? | Ep. 79
Oct 18, 2021
Mom guilt is real and it feels so heavy. Moms, do you ever find your thoughts spiraling through these statements?
“I’m such a mess!” “I can't get it together and my kids don't like me!” “I’m a bad mom” Stress, feeling overwhelmed, and lack of sleep can intensify all these feelings. It’s important to know you are not alone in the struggle with guilt and shame. And you don’t have to stay stuck in it. There is always hope!
In today’s podcast, Katie Wetsell (pediatric nurse and Connected Families Certified Parent Coach ) joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to share her own personal story of how she worked through difficult feelings of mom guilt. Katie shares with us the steps she took to embrace the truth of Jesus’ deep love and grace, and some surprising truths about looking at guilt through the filter of faith.
When viewed through the filter of God’s redemptive love and purpose, guilt can actually provide an opportunity for transformation within the safety of God’s gentleness and grace. And when we receive that gentleness and grace from God, we can in turn pour it out and model it to our children. You don’t have to live in the discouragement of Mom guilt!
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
the difference between guilt and shame and why it matterswhy moms often feel intense guilt about their parenting (and how you can navigate this in a healthy way!)the importance of the first level, Foundation, in the Connected Families Framework ”What’s going on in me?”--to break the cycle of shamehow you can be set free from the lies that keep you stuck in mom guilt through the redemptive and powerful love of Jesus
Mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families websiteConnected Families FrameworkConnected Families resourcesBible verses: 2 Corinthians 5:17, Ephesians 6:10-20, 2 Corinthians 12:9, Psalm 139, Hebrews 4:16, 1 John 2:1
About Katie Wetsell: Katie has always had a calling on her heart to care for children. She is a pediatric oncology nurse and pediatric nurse practitioner. After experiencing the benefits of parent coaching through Connected Families herself, Katie later resigned from nursing and became a certified parent coach as well. She and her husband have 4 children (3 boys and a girl) through birth and adoption. Katie is also trained in SPACE treatment to help parents learn how to support their children struggling with anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorders. For more information or to contact Katie, visit her website Parent With Hope.
How Do I Get My Child to Obey?
Oct 11, 2021
Does God require your kids to obey immediately? Immediate obedience is probably a familiar concept to you. And, to be quite honest, it’s a hot-button topic! If you've ever asked yourself, "How do I get my child to obey?" then this is the podcast for you!
Or maybe you feel like your demands for first-time obedience seem to bring more tension and discouragement for both you and your child? If so, this podcast will bring you clarity and encouragement as you seek to be a more connected parent!
How DO I get my child to obey?
Here at Connected Families, we approach this topic with a unique perspective. In today’s podcast, we dissect and unpack this important and sometimes misunderstood issue. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) as we continue our series about our Connected Families “special sauce”--what makes us unique!
Obedience is absolutely important to God and to you as a parent. We encourage you view the bigger picture of how God inspires obedience in His children. Control and fear-based parenting can create a toxic relationship, but a deeper and more connected relationship with your child will lead them toward wisdom. The context for obedience is a deep love relationship overflowing with the fullness of God’s grace.
In today’s podcast you’ll learn:
why immediate obedience can be a set-up for frustration for both you and childrenwhat the Bible and the life of Jesus tell us about immediate obediencethe importance of examining your own motives as a parent in order to bring the fullness of God’s love to your kidsthe difference between obedience and compliance- and why it matters!how to let go of demands in order to build wisdom and thoughtful responses in your child’s heart
You will not want to miss this conversation! It may forever change how you connect with your child as you seek to leave a legacy of wisdom and grace for your family. We would love to connect with you about this, or any other questions you may have! We invite you to contact us.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart online courseThe Prodigal God by Tim KellerBible verses mentioned in this podcast: John 14:23-24, 1 John 5:3, Isaiah 64:6, Matthew 23:25, Luke 15:11-32, Luke 1:17, 2 Corinthians 10:5, Colossians 3:21, Ephesians 6:4
The Key to Unlocking Wisdom and Responsibility in Kids
Sep 27, 2021
Your child is misbehaving and you just want it to, “Stop!” You want to bring some control to the situation. Emotions escalate. The key to unlocking a Christ-like identity, wisdom, and responsibility in your kids is not a method or a formula. It’s connection.
How to Be Safe for Your Kids | Ep. 76
Sep 20, 2021
It’s normal to feel stuck in the frustration of trying to “fix” your child’s behavior. Despite exploring numerous parenting resources and methods, does your heart still feel unsettled? Like you, many other parents feel the same way. Patterns of control, yelling, blaming, and shaming only seem to bring greater disconnection in your relationship with your child. You want things to be different. You want to be safe for your kids, but the patterns seem too ingrained.How can you find a better way to discipline; making sure you are safe for your kids while remaining firm?
Today’s podcast gets right to the heart of the Connected Families’ unique and profound biblical Framework for parenting. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) and Lydia Rex (Connected Families Parent Coach). Together they discuss the deep and lasting impact of the Connected Families Framework in their own families and in the families of those they work with every day.
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
the vital shift from “fix my child” to “fix myself” as you seek to build an environment of emotional safety how to approach parenting with curious questions instead of judgment as you build safety and wisdom the toxic thoughts and lies that can keep you stuck in shame as a parent, and how you can identify them and replace them with God’s grace and truth why humility is the “currency” of connection in discipline
The Connected Families “Secret Sauce” to genuine, heart-level change in parents and children occurs in communicating the most important messages that our kids long to hear: “You are safe with me” and “You are loved no matter what.” In Jesus’ love, you can show up with safety and connection and be the parent YOU long to be. Your own inner work will overflow to your child as you move past shame and despair to love and grace.
Parenting resources mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families FrameworkConnected Families Framework MagnetDiscipline That Connects Fall 2021 Online CourseDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart (book)Bible verses mentioned: Matthew 12:34, Psalm 139, Philippians 1:6, Romans 6:17,18, James 1:19
About Lydia Rex:
Lydia Rex is a registered nurse, wife, and mother of two and has worked with families in many capacities throughout her career and personal life. She’s been a student of Connected Families since 2014, and continues to find it incredibly life-giving for her own family. Areas of her experience/special interest include foster care and adoption, attachment difficulties, developmental and learning disabilities including FASD. She brings a trauma-informed perspective to the Connected Families Framework and the desire to see families find peace and healing - not just on the other side, but in the midst of challenges! Use our "Contact Us" form to connect with Lydia.
Want more information about Connected Families? Check out our website! Feel free to contact us and let us know how we can come alongside you in your parenting journey. We are here to guide you towards God's grace for you so that you can pass His grace and truth on to your children!
Why It’s Better to Parent in Community | Ep. 75
Sep 13, 2021
Ever feel alone or isolated as a parent? Between navigating your kids’ misbehavior in public, enduring other judgmental parents, and the demands of daily life, staying isolated can often feel easier than attempting social connection and events. Yet parenting without a solid community can bring feelings of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. Just like our kids, we as parents need to feel safety and connection in community too. That comes when we parent in community.
What holds us back from parenting in community? And what’s the way forward to more safe, connected, and meaningful parenting relationships?
Join us and our guest Heather MacFadyen, founder of Don’t Mom Alone, to hear how she worked through some rough seasons of isolation, and how she learned to build a life-giving parenting community around her. Heather joins Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) to discuss her inner healing journey, and several life-changing truths that offered her hope and a new perspective.
Your child’s choices and behavior don’t define you. When you explore what is going on inside of you as a parent in the safety of God’s grace, you can find hope and a new perspective too. You can dispel the shame and fear that keeps you isolated from parenting in community.
In this podcast, you’ll discover:
“Isolating ideas” that keep you from interacting with other parents and forming meaningful connection with themThe profound importance of starting with the Foundation of “What’s going on in me?”How shame can keep us isolated from connecting with other parentsThe Connected Families Framework that helps you embrace with grace the humanity of both you and your child
We are here for you in your parenting journey. Do you have a parenting testimony to share or have a parenting concern? If so please reach out to us! We hope you have learned life-giving tips today to help you parent with peace and connection.
About Heather MacFadyen:
Married and a mom to four sons, Heather struggled with the challenges of raising four young boys. She isolated herself from community, fearing embarrassment, rejection, and failure. Slowly she began to reach out to friends again and started to parent in community. Through prayer with friends, God healed wrong identities Heather was holding onto. She started a podcast called “God-Centered Mom” (now Don’t Mom Alone), a show that has been downloaded over 7 million times.
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Heather MacFadyen’s website: https://dontmomalone.com/
Don’t Mom Alone: Growing the Relationships You Need to be the Mom You Want to Be by Heather MacFadyen
The Soul of Shame: Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves by Curt Thompson
Connected Families: Discipline That Connects online course
The Connected Families Framework
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
How to Raise a Responsible Student (Who Has a Social Life) | Ep. 74
Aug 23, 2021
If you're like most parents, you want your child to be a responsible student. But you also want them to use their time wisely to they can have an active social life. (Aaaannnnd, it would be great if they were good at athletics, debate, excited about youth group every Wednesday night, AND could get their chores done without complaining. 😊)
Whatever your child’s strengths and challenges are, each school year brings a new set of hopes and dreams. You want your child to be a responsible student, but you also want them to learn life skills that will set them up for success outside of school.
Want a responsible student?
In this podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Bonnie Williams and Corrie Thetford (Connected Families Parent Coaches). This conversation will bring you incredibly practical and thoughtful strategies to guide your child toward responsibility in their schoolwork and beyond.
Coaching your child to be responsible can be an opportunity to build wisdom and connection. Find out how you can create a foundation of safety today that will open your child’s heart to work as a team with you, as you tackle all that life brings this year.
In this episode, you’ll hear:
Ways to come alongside with support and encouragement while still holding your child responsible for their schoolwork How certain expectations, beliefs, and demands can negatively impact your efforts to help your childLighthearted curious questions you can ask your child to build wisdom and set them up for successThe importance of discerning what’s under the surface causing anxiety and lack of motivation in your child’s schoolwork battles
Have you found yourself trying to figure out how to raise a responsible student? What strategies have helped you and your child navigate homework challenges? Is there something you would love to hear more about in our podcasts? We’d love to hear from you!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families Framework4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear (FREE ebook)The “Just Right Challenge”
About our guests on today’s podcast:
Bonnie Williams has a Master of Education in Special Education. She is a wife and the mother of 3 teenagers. She has supported students with learning and behavior challenges for over 25 years, specializing in working with parents with children ages 3 to 15. Helping families apply the Connected Families Framework is what Bonnie is passionate about. By doing this they can learn new strategies to grow in wisdom and help lead them in having peaceful, grace-filled homes. You can reach her by email at newpathways65@gmail.com.
Corrie Thetford has a Master of Arts in Marriage and Family Counseling. At some point she and her husband realized that the way they disciplined was driving a wedge between them and their kids. Because of this they sought coaching through Connected Families. Now, as Connected Families Certified Coaches, they work with other families to experience that same change and restored joy that they found through their coaching experience. Together, Corrie and Alan have founded Building Wise Families. You can learn more about them on the Building Wise Families Podcast. You can reach them by email at coaching@buildingwisefamilies.com.
If you are not currently following us on Instagram we encourage you to check it out. Our community is growing there and we’d love to partner with you in your parenting with timely encouragement just for you. Find us @connectedfams for your daily dose of parenting tips.
Classroom Anxiety: It’s Common, and You Can Help | Ep. 73
Aug 16, 2021
Is your child struggling with anxiety about going back to school? How do you navigate the uncertainties of a new school year? If you and your child are feeling stressed about all the changes and upheaval surrounding school, you are not alone! Classroom anxiety is more common than you think. We have some super helpful information to get you and your kids on the right track for a more calm and connected school year!
Today’s episode is absolutely packed with essential information and practical application. This podcast will help you better understand and connect with your child in their struggle with anxiety and possibly even trauma. Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Lynne Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) are joined by Jessica Sinarski, LPCMH, (Licensed Professional Counselor of Mental Health) and author of the book Riley the Brave Makes it to School. Using brain science research, Jessica equips parents, teachers, and other professionals to meet the needs of kids who are struggling, and to better incorporate effective trauma-sensitive practices into their interactions with children.
Beneath the surface, a child’s challenging behavior can often be anxiety. Entering into these tough situations with calm and safety are absolutely key in reaching your child. When kids externalize these big feelings, they need a safe place to land, and to work through, what is really going on in their brains and in their hearts. When you can understand their behavior and safely communicate I am for you, you can better help your child heal.
Powerful and practical tools you will gain in this podcast:
The research of what is happening in a child’s brain when they are anxious, and how that behavior may play out in unexpected waysHow to help both you and your child when reacting in the “downstairs brain”Understanding the “turtle,” “tiger,” and “porcupine” response in your child (and in yourself!)Practical ways to apply this information to your child’s back-to-school challenges and classroom anxietyThe power of connection within the Connected Families Framework
We’ve compiled a list of great resources for you below, and as always, we are here for you and would love for you to connect with us! (Or check out our parent coaching options.)
Resources from Jessica Sinarski:
Riley the Brave Makes it to School Brave Brains websiteRiley the BraveWhat’s Inside Your Backpack?
Connected Families resources mentioned in this podcast:
4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear (FREE ebook)Connected Families FrameworkSolve That After-School Crabbiness
Additional resources mentioned:
The Opposite of Worry by Lawrence CohenAttachment Play by Aletha SolterGood News for Little Hearts series (including Buster Tries to Bail) Arnie and His School Tools: Simple Sensory Solutions That Build Success by Jennifer VeenendallConnection Zoo, a play-based learning tool that helps kids build social and emotional skillsGo Zen, online social and emotional learning programs for kids ages 6-15
Guest bio:
Jessica Sinarski, LPCMH, equips parents and professionals to be healers for hurting children. Weaving user-friendly brain science into everything she does, she ignites both passion and know-how in audiences. Extensive post-graduate training and 15+ years as a clinician, consultant, and parent educator led her to create the resource and training platform she couldn’t find elsewhere: BraveBrains. Jessica continues to work as a therapist and clinical supervisor at an innovative adoption support agency in Delaware and serves on the board of directors at the largest Head Start provider in the Bronx, NY. She has shared her expertise as a contributor to magazines, blogs, and podcasts. At home, Jessica’s three busy boys will forever keep her laughing and learning.
If you are not currently following us on Instagram we encourage you to check it out. Our community is growing there and we’d love to partner with you in your parenting with timely encouragement just for you. Find us @connectedfams for your daily dose of parenting tips.
Are We Hardwired to Connect? Part 2- Ep. 72
Aug 10, 2021
What does the Bible say about connection in parenting? How do we work that out practically in everyday family life? Of course theology is important. But theology alone doesn’t always tell you how long your kids should play a video game, or how to specifically respond when your child asks tough questions.
That’s where scientific research comes in! We’ve heard from countless people the reason they continue to access Connected Families resources is because we integrate science and biblical principles. Our goal is to make what can seem lofty into digestible and practical content for parents.
Today’s episode is Part 2 of a discussion about what makes the Connected Families parenting approach so unique--the integration of science and Scripture! Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to continue the conversation about the Connected Families Framework.
In this podcast you’ll hear:
How scientific research is integrated in the last two steps of the Framework (“You are CALLED and CAPABLE.” and “You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions.”) The importance of listening to your kids without judgment in order to communicate empathy instead of anxietyThe power of calm, light-hearted questions to grow wisdom and responsibility in your childA more effective way to praise your child (that doesn’t lead to people-pleasing!)
We have a ton of great resources below to help you in your parenting journey. We hope these resources can be a helpful avenue of guidance and support for your family. Please contact us with any questions, we are here to help!
Resources mentioned in this podcast:
Hardwired to Connect (2003 Research Report) or check out this link for a summary of the report
Carol Dweck- A Study on Praise and Mindsets (video)
Scripture references: Ephesians 2:10, 1 Thessalonians 2:7,8, Psalm 139, Proverbs 29:5, Philippians 1:6, 1 Corinthians 6:12, Colossians 3:12
Build Kids Up with Nourishing Affirmation in 30 Seconds (The “ABC’s of Affirmation”)
The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. (online course)
FREE Resources: 4 Messages Every Kid Longs to Hear (ebook) and Perspectives on Spanking (ebook)
If you are not currently following us on Instagram, we encourage you to check it out. Our community is growing there, and we’d love to partner with you in your parenting with timely encouragement just for you. Find us @connectedfams for your daily dose of parenting tips.
Are We Hardwired to Connect? Part 1-Ep.71
Aug 09, 2021
Are you longing for practical parenting resources that address both the spiritual and the scientific? Why are they both important? God created our souls, brains, and bodies, and He wants us to understand His creation. Research affirms the biblical truth that you and your kids are hardwired to connect. The science of connection combined with the wisdom of God’s Word are the heartbeat of all we do and teach at Connected Families.
You won't want to miss today’s Connected Families podcast! The Connected Families Framework is compelling and effective. Why? Because of the unique and powerful intersection of science and the Bible.
In today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families). Together they will discuss how you can be empowered as a parent to form a deep and meaningful connection with your child. Learn to utilize scientific research as you implement biblical truth in your parenting to unlock your child’s heart. Instead of a quick behavior fix, turn your child’s heart toward wisdom built on a foundation of love, safety, and connection.
You’ll be equipped in your parenting as you learn about:
How the latest research applies to and is interwoven into, the first two levels of the Connect Families Framework (“You are SAFE with me.” and “You are LOVED no matter what.”)How the science of connection affirms biblical truth in parentingA powerful sequence to address behavior used by the FBI that you can use in your parentingPractical ways you can implement the Connected Families Framework in daily life
Scripture references and resources mentioned in this episode:
The 4 Most Important Messages You Can Send Your Kids Connecting: Healing Ourselves and Our Relationships (book by Larry Crabb)Ephesians 1:3, Luke 1:17 , Proverbs 15:1, 1 John 3:1
If you are not currently following us on Instagram, we encourage you to check it out. Our community is growing there, and we’d love to partner with you in your parenting with timely encouragement just for you. Find us @connectedfams for your daily dose of parenting tips.
Teach Your Child to Have a Growth Mindset with These Four Steps | Ep. 70
Jul 26, 2021
Have you heard the buzz about having a "growth mindset"* versus a "fixed mindset"? How can you teach your child to have a growth mindset? When our kids lack the skills to do what we are asking them to do it can create discouragement in your home.
Maybe you've even asked yourself the following:
“Why isn’t my kid motivated to clean their room?”“How many times do I have to show my child how to load the dishwasher?”“What does it take for my child to notice the towel on the bathroom floor?”
It would be great if our kids would just do things they are asked without any difficulties, right? Even better if they actually noticed what needed to be done.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t typically happen that way, which leaves everyone feeling frustrated! Growing skills in your kids is important to you, but how do you do that and still communicate safety, love, and connection in your home?
In today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) share a super practical tool you can use today to help your kids build skills with wisdom and connection. It’s called Motivate. Model. Practice. Praise. This is an intentional process built on the idea that lasting skills are both caught and patiently taught.
Modelind and teaching your child to have a growth mindset includes taking the time to learn the underlying emotions they experience while learning new skills. Building wisdom and connection affirms to your child, “You are called and capable of growing and learning new things.”
Listen in and you will discover :
How to practically use the four steps of Motivate. Model. Practice. Praise.The power of wise questions to help motivate your childThe importance of looking within ourselves to understand and change our own responses to our kidsHow to develop a team concept to get you and your child on the same pageA more effective way to praise your child
Resources to help you grow skills in your kids:
Motivate. Model. Practice. Praise. Proactively Grow Skills Without Demands and ThreatsThe Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. (Online course)Is There a “Miracle Grow” for Good Behavior? The ABC’s of AffirmationConnected Families FrameworkPhilippians 3:13-14
Do you have a comment about something that’s helped you, a question, or something you would like addressed in a future podcast? Contact us, or get in touch with us about our parent coaching options. We’d love to hear from you!
*Growth mindset is a term originally coined by Child Psychologist Carol Dweck and popularized by numerous authors. Our use of the term is most closely informed by her work.
Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child.
Help! My Child Keeps Unbuckling and the Kids are Spitting! | Ep. 69
Jul 19, 2021
Your child keeps unbuckling their seatbelt in a tantrum while you are driving down a busy road. One of your kids spits at his sibling when he gets angry. What do you do when your child has big emotions and actions, and despite your best efforts to implement connection and correction, the behavior doesn’t seem to improve? Maybe you’ve experienced challenging situations like these, and you don’t even know where to start.
In today’s episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) to discuss some of the challenging questions parents ask about correction. (Like, "What do I do when my child keep unbuckling?) Using the Connected Families Framework, Jim and Lynne walk through several of these situations, offering unique thoughts about ways to hold your child responsible, but still kindly and firmly communicate, you are safe and loved.
In this episode you’ll discover:
The Connected Families Framework, and the power of asking wise questions to impart wisdom (instead of just managing behavior)How to search for the underlying issues (such as sensory) that could be contributing to misbehaviorWhat it means to allow your child to experience the natural impact of their choicesDisarming tense situations in unique waysHow to help kids communicate in ways that honor themselves and others
Even when the way forward during correction isn’t clear, you can build a bridge to empathy for your child by helping them connect their strong emotions to empowering words. You can help them find a way to communicate what’s going on under the surface of the misbehavior, and guide them to make wiser choices.
Helpful resources mentioned in this podcast:
Connected Families FrameworkFREE Parenting Assessment
Want to learn more?
Connection in Correction (Love No Matter What!)Helping Kids With Anger (ebook)“The habit of connecting first makes the bigger issues of life easier to handle.”
Christian Discipline: The story behind our unique framework for parenting | Ep. 68
Jul 12, 2021
As a parent you might feel overwhelmed with the mountain of resources available to you regarding Christian discipline. From podcasts, to books, to seminars, there is no shortage of available content you could access. But, when you are Christ-follower AND you are tuned into the latest in research and attachment-based parenting, you are looking for something more. Something that combines heart, soul, and body.
Connected Families was born from this deeply felt need of parents who were longing for real solutions and a deeper connection with their kids.
Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) hosts Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) for a very special interview about the founding roots of Connected Families and their exciting vision for the future. From a 3:00am wake-up call from God to a community of thousands of parents, hear how God has uniquely guided every step of the Connected Families journey with wisdom and purpose.
Join us for today’s podcast to learn more about the past, present, and future of Connected Families!
In this episode you’ll hear:
How the intensity of Jim and Lynne’s own family informed Connected Families and moved them forward in their ministry to other parents
The impact of the Connected Families Framework for parents, within the organization’s team, and within Jim and Lynne’s work as a married couple serving in ministry together
The vital role of Connected Families parent communities and the Insiders Team
The compelling future vision for the Connected Families ministry
Thank you for partnering with us and being a part of our Connected Families community! As always, please reach out to us and let us know how we can continue to come alongside you in your parenting journey.
Connected Families resources and opportunities mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart (book)
How to Grow a Connected Family
Connected Families Insiders Team
My Kid is Looking at Porn
Jun 21, 2021
“My kid is looking at porn! What should I do?” Have you experienced this? Or maybe you are concerned about how to prepare your child for future encounters with something inappropriate. Pornography is highly accessible in today’s culture. Marketers seem to sexualize everything to sell products. In a world where we are unable to shield our children from this, how do we respond?
Today’s podcast is the third of a three-part series focused on topics that dads often encounter as they seek to lead with grace. Join Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) as they discuss the very sensitive and challenging topic of kids and pornography.
As we seek to impart boundaries and wisdom to our kids regarding pornography, our reactions about this topic can either increase shame or invite connection. When we bring God’s grace and truth into the challenge of kids and porn, we can focus on our kids' hearts and the parent-child connection that they so desperately need to navigate their struggle.
You’ll learn in this episode:
How to confront a child who has been caught viewing pornographyThe vital importance of connection with your child as you prepare to talk to your kids about pornographyWays in which the Connected Families Framework can empower you to discover: “What is going on in me? What’s it like to be my child?”The ways that shame and secrecy can affect your child’s struggle and your relationship with your child
This is not an easy topic to navigate, so please let us know how we can come alongside you, and help bring God’s grace and truth to your family.
Bible verses mentioned in this podcast:
Galatians 5:16-26Galatians 6:1-2 Matthew 5:27-30Philippians 1:6Philippians 4:6-7
Want to learn more?
What to Do When You Catch Your Child Looking at Porn
Setting Boundaries with Screens | Ep. 66
Jun 14, 2021
“My kid is obsessed with gaming! Are they addicted? What should I do?” If you’ve found yourself making these kinds of statements you are not alone. It’s amazing how something small on a screen can have such a big impact. And screens are everywhere. How do you set boundaries when you think your child is addicted to screens?
There are real solutions and we are going to dig into them. Today’s podcast is the second of a three-part series focused on topics that dads often encounter as they seek to lead with grace. In this episode, Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) tackle the common but difficult topic of screen addictions (especially video gaming).
We’ll dive into important and practical topics such as:
How you can use the Connected Families Framework to help your child and yourself have a healthy relationship with screensThe importance of communicating to your child, “You are capable of overcoming this struggle!”How to build wisdom and responsibility in your kids’ video game habits while showing empathy and compassionWays to ask questions and set boundaries with video games that invite conversation and connection with your child
Screen addiction is a real thing and it is not easy! Let us know how we can come alongside you as you help your child work through this challenge. We are here to help!
Resources mentioned in this episode:
Sibling Conflict CourseConnect Families Framework
Want to learn more?
Why Do Kids Obsess Over Video Games?Healthy Screen Time With Kids--An Oxymoron or Hopeful Possibility?Keep Calm and Stay Connected (to your teen!)
Take 15 minutes to learn how to give consequences that teach, rather than simply punish, by downloading our free ebook Consequences That Actually Work.
How to Leave a Legacy | Ep. 65
Jun 07, 2021
What comes to your mind when you hear the word “legacy”? We feel inspired when we hear stories about the legacy of someone who has made an impact in the world. Hearing these stories may inspire you to want to leave a valuable legacy of your own. OR maybe that idea feels painful to you. You might have regrets and wonder if it’s too late to leave the legacy you had hoped for.
Whatever your experience, take heart and be strengthened that today is a new day! This podcast will guide you in taking steps to leave a legacy of faith for future generations.
In today’s podcast, Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and Connected Families Coach) discuss how to leave a legacy of faith for your kids. During the month of June, in recognition of Father’s Day, we are focusing on topics geared towards issues that dads often encounter, as they seek to lead with grace. (Moms, listen in too! There’s loads of encouragement here for you as well.)
Leaving a legacy is purposefully planting seeds of hope, life, and generosity. It means trusting God’s love to make those seeds grow. It’s never too late to leave a legacy!
In this podcast, you’ll learn:
Practical and thoughtful ways of leaving a legacy of faith for your childHow to handle shame and past regrets, and leave a new legacy starting todayThe importance of authenticity as a parent, and sharing your own testimony of how God has worked in your lifeThe value of celebrating God’s blessings as a family and sharing those blessings with others
Mentioned in this podcast:
C.S. Lewis quoteMatthew 6:19-211 Corinthians 3:6-81 Thessalonians 2:11-12Joshua 4:21-22Deut 6:4-9Sibling Conflict Online Course
Help! My Child is Violent! | Ep. 64
Jun 01, 2021
You ask your child to do something simple and they respond with violence. Your five-year-old comes at you forcefully with a toy and is going to hit you. Maybe your teenager is physically fighting and things are getting out of hand. You start to realize your child is violent. Now what?
As a parent in this situation, you may feel discouragement, fear, anxiety, or even shame. It’s hard to know what to do when your child is physically aggressive, and it’s natural to feel your own emotions escalate as well. You may be wondering, “How can I bring peace to this toxic situation?”
Defusing a child who is violent
In today’s episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) to discuss the difficult challenges of parenting a child who struggles with being physically aggressive. Jim and Lynne talk through the Connected Families Framework, and how it can help defuse an angry child in the heat of the moment. Longer term, this podcast will help guide you as a parent to provide love, safety, and connection for your child.
In this podcast you’ll learn:
How to create a strong and confident foundation as a parent: What is going on in me when my child is violent?How your child’s underlying anxiety can often be masked as anger: What’s going on in my child when they explode?Practical and loving ways to provide safety and connection to a child who needs restraint The power of empathy and truthful, compassionate, phrases to communicate to your child: “I am for you, you are loved, we’ll get through this together.”
As always, we are here to help and you are not alone! Check out some of our resources below, or reach out to us to learn more about how Connected Families can walk alongside you in your parenting journey.
Encouraging verses and resources mentioned in this podcast:
James 1:5 Romans 15:13FREE Resources Helping Kids With Anger (FREE ebook)Grace and Truth for Moms (online course)Connected Families Framework
Do you feel stuck in negative patterns? Feeling isolated? Are you anxious about your kids’ successes or failures? Our Grace and Truth for Moms online course will help you identify and hold on to God’s truth about YOU, and equip you to stop believing toxic lies about yourself. This course is created for small groups, so grab a few other moms and be encouraged!
What’s the Best Way To Handle Shared Parenting? | Ep. 63
May 27, 2021
Navigating the challenges of being a single mom or single dad
Being a Single Mom is Exhausting | Ep. 62
May 24, 2021
Are you a single mom? Do you find being a single mom is exhausting? Listen in on this episode focused on single parenting. You are not alone.
Grace and Truth for Moms | Ep. 61
May 03, 2021
Does the stress and struggle of parenting leave you feeling unworthy or incapable of being the mom you long to be? Do these statements sound familiar? “I’m a failure as a mom and I have ruined my kids!” “I’m an angry parent with an angry child!” Perhaps it feels like you are parenting from a place of discouragement and anxiety. We want you to know that God’s grace runs deep for you, and you are not alone. You can find grace and truth for yourself as a mom.
In today’s episode, you will learn how to work through the feelings of doubt and discouragement that many moms experience. In this rebroadcast from 2020, Lynne Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) joins Heather MacFadyen on her podcast, Don’t Mom Alone. Heather interviews Lynne about the importance of recognizing toxic lies you may believe (about yourself and your kids) and how to replace those lies with God’s grace and truth.
You’ll learn to process your difficult feelings and beliefs in a way that helps you to be a vessel of grace and truth for yourself--and for your kids.
Discover in today’s podcast:
how extreme thinking, perfectionism, and catastrophizing can keep you stuck in a negative parenting cycle
practical ways to work through negative emotions and experience God’s healing and peace
the importance of having support from other moms who can listen and encourage you
encouragement that can help you persevere in living out God’s grace and truth for you and your kids
About Heather MacFadyen:
Married and a mom to four sons, Heather struggled with the challenges of raising four young boys. She isolated herself from community, fearing embarrassment, rejection, and failure. Slowly she began to reach out to friends again. Through prayer with friends, God healed wrong identities Heather held onto. She started a podcast called “God-Centered Mom” (now Don’t Mom Alone), a show that has been downloaded over 7 million times.
Bible verses mentioned in this podcast:
Matthew 12:34
Ephesians 4:15
Ephesians 6:4
Psalm 139:14
2 Corinthians 10:5
Resources from this podcast to encourage you:
You Are a Daughter of the King speech (design courtesy of Don’t Mom Alone)
Trash, Truth, Treasure: Helping Kids Turn Anger into Wisdom
Grace and Truth for Moms Online Course
Do you feel stuck in negative patterns? Are you isolated? Are you anxious about your kids' successes or failures? Our Grace and Truth for Moms online course will help you identify and hold on to God's truth about YOU, and equip you to stop believing toxic lies about yourself. This course is created for small groups, so grab a few other moms and be encouraged!
How Can I Teach My Child to Pray Heartfelt Prayers? | Ep. 60
Apr 26, 2021
Do you struggle to teach your child how to pray? How do you instill something deeper when your child just wants to pray for a new xbox?
Like many parents, you likely desire to see your kids engage in a meaningful prayer life. That can be hard! Sometimes kids just get bored when we pray! Or find it difficult to get past a surface-level prayer. The good news: There are many practical and effective ways to model and encourage your kids to grow in more heartfelt and personal prayer.
Today on the Connected Families podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Chad and Carma Hayenga about their journey to a deeper and more personal prayer life. You’ll hear how this overflowed to their kids, and positively changed the heart of their family. We trust you will find encouragement and practical tips in this podcast to teach your child to pray and for your family’s prayer journey!
In this podcast, Chad and Carma discuss:
The transforming power of experiencing Jesus’ presence in prayerHow to transform rote and programmed prayers into a personal conversation with GodA larger vision for your family’s prayer life, as well as practical everyday prayer opportunitiesWays to help kids express their faith creatively according to their personality and giftsParticipating in God’s Kingdom work at home and around the world through prayer
More about Chad and Carma:
Chad Hayenga is a Marriage and Family Therapist and certified life coach with a background in counseling struggling youth and families. As a prayer intercessor, Carma has a deep passion to see families changed through the power of prayer. Combining their skills, and trusting in the power of the Holy Spirit to effect change, they have seen people experience incredible spiritual freedom. Interested in learning more? Check out this unique coaching option to connect personally with Chad and Carma.
Resources about prayer mentioned in this podcast:
Prison to Praise by Merlin Carothers
Is That Really You, God? by Loren Cunningham
Voice of the Martyrs FREE magazine subscription
Help! How do I keep a conversation going with my child? | Ep. 59
Apr 21, 2021
Frequently parents focus on conversation skills when there is conflict. But what about in the normal day-to-day interactions? Do you feel like it is more difficult than it needs to be to have a “normal” conversation with your child? Do you feel like you spend a lot of time telling your child what to do instead of asking the right questions? It's hard when you feel like, "My child won't talk to me!"Sadly, sometimes our reactions as parents is what shuts the conversation down. Can you relate? If so, this podcast discussion will bring you the honest and hope-giving guidance you are looking for as you desire to have open and honest conversations with your kids.
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Chad Hayenga (therapist and Connected Families parent coach) to talk about how you can engage in meaningful, on-going conversations that bring connection with your child. You can keep the important conversations going with your kids by asking gentle, light-hearted, curious questions that help your child feel safe to open up to you.
In this podcast, we’ll discuss:
The power of kind and curious questions to unlock a child’s heartKeeping shame out of the conversation with your childHow to respond when kids have doubts about their faith and GodPractical ways to calmly respond when your child says something that triggers you! The importance of your strong, solid foundation in Christ to create stability for your struggling child
Connecting to and valuing what is going on in your child’s heart can keep the conversation going for years to come!
Parenting resources mentioned in this podcast:
The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. (online course)
Want to learn more for when, "My child won't talk to me!"
Stay Curious During Tough Conversations: Why Lectures Never Win
Connected Families Framework
What Should I Do When My Child Is Having a Meltdown in Public? | Ep. 58
Apr 14, 2021
You’re in the grocery store. Or the park. Or at a family gathering. And you sense a major meltdown coming. It’s so embarrassing when your child has a meltdown in public - especially when you know other people are watching!
Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they offer practical and down-to-earth solutions to this real-life struggle. This podcast addresses some common questions we frequently hear, such as:
“What should I do when my child is having a meltdown in public?”“Is there a time and place for immediate obedience, and what does that look like?”“How can I better connect with my child in a discipline situation?”
Along with these helpful insights, you’ll gain a crucial “big picture” perspective of your (and your child’s) identity as God’s beloved children. Not perfect parents with well-behaved kids, but imperfect parents and kids learning together in the love and grace of Jesus.
Bible references mentioned in this podcast:
The Parable of the Two Sons (Matthew 21:28-32)Jesus’ Warnings to the Pharisees (Matthew 23:25-36)
Want to learn more about how to help your child when they meltdown in public?
Connected Families FrameworkDiscipline that Connects with Your Child’s Heart (book)FREE Resources to Strengthen Connection with Your Child
Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child.
My Child Quits Everything | Ep. 57
Mar 24, 2021
In today’s episode we dig into the second part of our series on raising overcomers! Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) talk about how to help kids develop resilience and, in the process, uncover the unique purpose God has for them. If you feel like your child quits everything too soon then this is the podcast for you.
Does your child get stuck in defeat? Or have trouble moving forward when things feel too hard? These can be beautiful opportunities to see the gifts beneath their struggling behavior. You can encourage and strengthen your child to do hard things while communicating to them, “I'm with you in this, we're going to do it together.”
This podcast explores:
Two key ingredients you need to help you and your kids work through challengesHow to model resilience with peace and connection when you feel like your child quits everythingThe gift-gone-awry underneath your child’s struggle with resilienceHow to create an environment that can provide the foundation to teach kids resilienceA mother’s story of how she helped her son tackle a frustrating situation
Resiliency resources mentioned in this podcast:
The Foundations of the Resiliency Framework by Bonnie Benard
Want to learn more?
12 Misbehaviors and the Gifts-Gone-Awry Behind Them: Seeing Strengths even in Struggles
Connecting to your child through our Connected Families Framework
To learn more, register for our online course The Entitlement Fix: Growing Hard Work and Gratitude In Your Kids!
This fast-paced 4-session course is designed to give parents a solid strategy for stamping out entitled attitudes, and moving toward greater meaning in life.
You’ll learn to take your kids through a simple process for helping your family have constructive conversations about rights, responsibilities, and privileges in your home. You’ll learn graceful responses for the inevitable conflict that emerges when parents confront selfishness. Most importantly, you’ll learn a perspective that grounds all your efforts in eternal truths from the Bible.
Raising Overcomers: How to Model Resiliency to Your Kids | Ep. 56
Mar 16, 2021
In this raw and candid episode, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) to discuss both the challenges and the beauty of raising overcomers.
Kids Struggling to Sleep? Here’s How to Equip Them to Sleep Well | Ep.55
Mar 10, 2021
Do you feel like bedtime struggles are a losing battle? Does bedtime leave you feeling exhausted? Your child wants another glass of water, another bedtime story. They’re afraid of the dark. Or overflowing with wound-up energy from the day. You are exhausted. Frustrated. And if your kids are struggling to sleep, you don’t sleep!
We have heard your cries! Kids not going to sleep (or staying asleep) is a fairly frequent concern we hear from parents during coaching sessions. If you feel like you have tried everything and wonder why nothing is working, you’re in the same boat as so many other sleep-deprived families!
As parents we sometimes want to push through this time to bring some peace to the end of our day. But what if bedtime could be a way to tap into your child’s heart in a way that makes them feel safe, understood, and loved? What if you change your mindset to see that when your child is struggling to sleep this could be an opportunity for deep connection?
It really can be! You can transform difficult bedtime routines into an opportunity for deep and lasting connection with your child. How? In this podcast we’ll introduce you to a unique and holistic approach that gets to the heart of your child. We’ll give practical, science-based, tips that you can use today.
Listen in as Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Lynne Jackson, co-founder of Connected Families and author of Transform Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime Snuggles. (Our newest resource!) Together they discuss ways to help prepare both you and your child for a peaceful night of rest.
This podcast dives deep into:
Obstacles that can hinder kids from a good night’s sleepPractical sleep solutions that really workCalming your child’s body, mind, heart, and spirit to help them sleepHow a connected approach to bedtime can bring peace to your evenings
Sleep and parenting resources mentioned in this podcast:
eBook: Transforming Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime SnugglesBook: Why We SleepBook: The Opposite of WorryPsalm 4:8Isaiah 41:13Connected Families FREE Resources
Want to learn more?
Connected Families FrameworkHow to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids
The sweet bedtime cuddles you dream of deteriorate far too often into mayhem. You’ve got this! Bring peace to your child’s body, mind, heart, and spirit. So they (and you!) can sleep well. Download and read our FREE in-depth ebook Transform Bedtime Struggles into Nighttime Snuggles.
How to Take Advantage of Sibling Rivalry to Explain Emotions and Feelings to a Child
Feb 25, 2021
Few things can be more frustrating as a parent than trying to mediate sibling rivalry. You want your kids to be friends but instead they are fighting, badgering, and teasing each other. It feels like you are getting nowhere! You think, “How do I stop him from hitting others?” or “Why can’t my kids just get along?!” But what if we could use sibling conflict as an opportunity to explain emotions and feelings to a child?
You know what the cool thing is? Sibling rivalry is the perfect opportunity for teaching emotional awareness and explaining about feelings and emotions to a child. If you’re looking for an emotional intelligence activity, look no further. Just wait for the next time your kids start arguing—probably some time in the next nine minutes.
An opportunity to explain emotions and feelings to a child
When kids fight with siblings or playmates, their selfish tendencies can get the best of them. But there is real hope: When you as a parent express empathy, you can unlock your child’s big emotions. You can also teach your kids to have empathy for each other. How? By explaining to your child about feelings and emotions, and giving them the language and skills to identify those feelings in themselves and each other.
Today’s episode is the second part in a series about The Power of Empathy. Join Stacy Bellward (podcast host) and Lynne Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families) as they discuss this super common challenge. You’ll learn solid steps and practical strategies to help you walk your kids through conflict in a way that strengthens their relationship. You can help your kids learn to value each other and to feel a lasting connection.
This podcast is full of insight, ideas, and brain-science as we talk about feelings and emotions and how we explain these to a child. Listen to the podcast to learn:
How to apply empathy to sibling conflictHow to help kids connect physical sensations with emotionsCreative ways to teach emotional intelligence in a fun non-shaming wayThe need to understand ourselves before we can understand or have empathy for others and how that relates to teaching our children about feelings and empathy
Emotional intelligence resources mentioned in this podcast:
Part 1 of our Empathy Series: The Power of Empathy: How to Teach Your Child to "Feel Another's Feelings" Blog article: Can True Empathy Really Be Taught to Kids?Dr. Dan Siegel: Name It to Tame ItEmotions chartThe “just right challenge”Connected Families "Anger e-book" (FREE!)
Want to learn more?
Check out our Connected Families Framework
In our online course Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their own arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Join us today so your kids can begin building the relationships you always imagined.
The Power of Empathy: How to Teach Your Child to “Feel Another’s Feelings” | Ep. 53
Feb 17, 2021
“How do you think that makes your sister feel?” or “You can’t do that to him!” Sound familiar? As a parent you likely want your child to be known as kind, generous, sensitive, and empathetic. These expectations can cause stress and anxiety if we see our child behaving in a way that lacks the power of empathy.
Empathy is a natural skill we are born with, right? Nope. What is natural for kids? To be selfish, egocentric, and not think about the feelings of others. So you might be wondering, "Can empathy be taught to kids?" Absolutely.
Today, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families). Together they offer hopeful solutions and practical insights that can graciously guide you and your child toward empathy, using our Connected Families Framework for parenting. It may be a longer journey for some kids than others, but you’ll be equipped with the tools to start them in the right direction!
In todays episode, you’ll learn:
Practical ways to nurture brain pathways that help develop empathyHow to engage with and teach empathy in sibling conflictThe power of gentle, thoughtful questions to draw out empathy from your childHow Jesus modeled empathy
Mentioned in this podcast:
Hebrews 4:15-16Video: Brené Brown on Empathy (Kid Friendly!) Video: Brené Brown on EmpathyPrayer of Saint Francis
Want to learn more?
Can True Empathy Really be Taught to Kids?20 Statement that Communicate Empathy to KidsThe Five Powerful Results of Empathy
In our Sibling Conflict online course we teach parents how to teach their kids the four steps of The Peace Process. Whether you have constant sibling battles in your home or you want to lay a strong foundation of reconciliation, enroll in the course! You’ll be helping your kids build a lifetime of healthy conflict resolution.
Thinking About How to Fix Your Marriage? Try This. | Ep. 52
Feb 10, 2021
Do you ever feel like you want to try and fix your marriage? Or change something about your spouse? The solution to this challenge might surprise you!
In this podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) are hosted by their good friend, Ellie Hope Collins, on her podcast Hope Reclaimed. We are passionate about building strong marriages as a vital piece of the parenting puzzle! In honor of Valentine’s Day, we have a special episode for you on emotionally safe marriages.
“Our marriage is all built on this strange, quirky, messy foundation of grace, of safety, of identity in Christ.” -Jim Jackson
Listen in as Jim, Lynne, and Ellie have a candid, thought-provoking conversation about building a strong foundation of honesty and communication in marriage. Jim and Lynne share how they have successfully applied parts of the Connected Families Framework to their own marriage. This podcast is full of marriage and communication tips you can use today! We trust you will finish feeling encouraged and equipped.
In today’s episode, learn more about:
how to embrace your spouse’s quirks without letting them drive you crazy!building a solid foundation of safety by asking, “What's going on in me?” getting back to connection after conflict.avoiding the “shame-blame” cycle.the sacred role of God’s grace and mercy while working through marriage struggles.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Matthew 5:23, 24
Matthew 18
Want to learn more?
Fighting for Love--Even When it’s Hard
What Could Have Ruined Our Marriage
How to Parent Together When You’re Total Opposites
Host bio:
Giving support to men and women healing from divorce, trauma and betrayal, Ellie Hope Collins is the founder of the ministry Hope Reclaimed. Through podcasts, live and virtual events, and the Healing From Divorce Online Course, she has helped thousands of men and women recognize that healing is available. Ellie hails from St. Paul, Minnesota where she lives with her husband, Austin.
*This podcast originally aired in July of 2019
Got a Strong-Willed Child? So Did This Mom. | Ep. 51
Feb 03, 2021
Your strong-willed child is refusing to choose. You are offering two choices, just like you've learned. "Give your child some choices," they said. "It will help them feel some control," they said. But your child just stamps their foot and refuses to choose.
You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions!
During the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course, parents ask questions in a moderated format. We wanted to bring some of these questions (and their answers!) to you, our podcast community!
Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects online course) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Jim and Lynne answer some of the most frequently asked listener questions we hear in our online courses and beyond. This is the second episode in a two-part series. You’ll definitely want to hear the answers to these questions!
In this episode we answer the questions:
“How do I remain patient with my strong-willed and stubborn child refuses to choose? I feel like I am going to lose it!”“Both my 15-month-old and 5-year-old are hitting other kids when they don’t get what they want. How should I respond?”“What are the strengths underneath my child’s misbehavior?”“How do I help my child learn to make it right?” (Coaching kids to think wisely in discipline situations, or when they’ve hurt someone.)
It has not been an easy season of parenting. We would love to support you in making the tweaks that will bring lasting change! Join Stacy Bellward and hundreds of other parents from around the world for our upcoming Discipline That Connects online course. This course is offered only twice a year. Join us today! Registration closes on Feb 8th.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Meet Kara who Lives in Thailand (child struggling with choices mentioned in podcast)Book: Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s HeartPhilippians 4:6-7Connected Families Framework for parenting
Want to learn more?
Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course this winter. Registration closes on February 8th! Download our FREE eBook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Check out our Connected Families FrameworkTo get more insight into today’s topic check out: Connecting with Toddler & Teens During Discipline
Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child.
Your Child Struggles to Transition. Here’s What to Do. | Episode 50
Jan 27, 2021
You have work to do and need to move on from playing with your child. They don't want you to go. And they whine. They fuss. What can you do when your child struggles to transition?
You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions!
Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course) is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Jim and Lynne answer some of the most frequently asked listener questions we hear in our online courses and beyond. This is the first of a two-part series. You’ll definitely want to hear the answers to these questions!
In short: Your greatest opportunity to show unconditional love to your child is during a discipline situation!
In this episode we answer the questions:
"How can I best calm myself when my child is struggling?""What should I do when my child hits me?""How can I make bedtime go more smoothly?""My child wants to keep playing with me and I have things I have to do. What are some ways I can help them transition?"
It has not been an easy season of parenting for many of our listeners, and we would love to support you in making the tweaks that will bring lasting change. Join Stacy Bellward and hundreds of other parents from around the world for our upcoming Discipline That Connects online course. This course is offered only twice a year! (Your kids will thank you!)
Mentioned in this podcast:
The Connected Families Framework for parentingRomans 5:82 Corinthians 10:5
Want to learn more?
Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our FREE eBook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Check out our Connected Families FrameworkTo get more insight into today’s topic check out: Safety First: Creating a Culture of Security and Well-Being in Your Home
Want to learn more about these concepts? Download our one hour recording of a Discipline That Connects workshop.
The God-Given Gifts in Your Child's Misbehavior
Jan 20, 2021
It takes skill to misbehave! A verbal child often argues with you until you’re exhausted. An emotional child might cry or manipulate. A physical child is more likely to get aggressive or grab something they want. Though it feels frustrating and even counter-intuitive, a shift in attention to your child’s strengths by finding their gift-gone-awry can help.
Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Together they talk about the third part of the Connected Families framework: You are CALLED and CAPABLE! They discuss the transformational idea of finding the gifts beneath your child’s misbehavior. The challenge for parents is to identify the “gift” within the misbehavior; what we call a “Gift-Gone-Awry.”
In this podcast* Jim and Lynne share:
a life-giving vision to reframe your child’s gifts gone awrythe importance of embracing this challenging visionhow Jesus saw and encouraged a gift-gone-awrypractical strategies for identifying, not suppressing, your child’s gifts
We also hear from Jessica, an alum from our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. She shares a practical example of looking for the gift-gone-awry in a tough situation with her son. Before taking the course, her approach to discipline unintentionally communicated to her son, “You are a problem!” Now their relationship has been transformed as she is learning to view her son as someone gifted for God’s good purposes!
Want to learn more?
Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our FREE eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Check out our Connected Families Framework Get more insight into today’s topic: 12 Misbehaviors and the Gifts-Gone-Awry Behind Them
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
*This podcast originally aired in September of 2019.
Why Demanding Respect From Kids Doesn’t Work | Ep. 48
Dec 16, 2020
Recently, we introduced you to Juan and Nita from South Africa. Today, we are excited to bring you a more in-depth interview where they share their heart for their two daughters as well as the 196 children who live in LIV village. They are learning that demanding respect from children often doesn't work in the long run.
Married for almost 12 years, Juan and Nita are the parents of two children and cross-cultural missionaries in their native South Africa. Listen in as they tell of the exciting work God is doing through the Connected Families’ Discipline That Connect With Your Child’s Heart online course. They have seen transformation not only in their own family, but in the school where they work.
Nita cried out to God for help both in their home, and in the school where they work. God answered her prayer through a friend who introduced her to the Connected Families resources. After using these resources, Nita noticed significant positive changes in the way she parented and related to her children.
Juan works at LIV Village with orphaned and vulnerable children who have experienced trauma. He has seen remarkable changes in both himself and the kids through the principles learned in the Discipline That Connects online course.
In this episode you will:
Hear the story of God’s work through Connected Families in cross-cultural situations.
Discover the power of the Gospel in how God parents us. And also get ideas for how we can extend that same grace to our children.
Learn how the Connected Families Framework is lived out in practical, everyday life.
Mentioned in this episode:
Discipline That Connects with Your Child's Heart online course
The Connected Families Framework
Connected Families free resources
How to Connect with Your Kids in Any Circumstance | Ep. 47
Dec 09, 2020
As you’re heading into some potentially stressful situations over the next few weeks (changing schedules, relatives who might judge your parenting, or not feeling connected to your kiddos) take some time and listen to this encouraging podcast we pulled out of the archives. (This podcast originally aired in 2015.)
Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, were interviewed by Heather MacFadyen of the Don't Mom Alone podcast (formally God Centered Mom). While some of the scenarios may not be relevant to today (car rides to see relatives, eating in restaurants), they give some really practical tips and scripts that can always be used, whatever the circumstance.
With an overview of the Connected Families Framework for parenting, you will feel equipped to keep your cool (and even connect!) with your kids during this time. The strategies and stories discussed will give you a vision for hope-filled holidays.
Highlights of their conversation:
Why kids can behave better at school/other places and fall apart at home.Helping your kids get through challenging scenarios, like traveling and restaurants.How to connect with your kids when you don’t even like them.Do you feel like relatives might judge your parenting? Learn to recognize your need to get your parents’ approval (the grandparents) when kids misbehave. What to do when you are trying to connect with your child and they are not responding.
So, maybe while running errands, wrapping gifts, or folding laundry listen to this interview. You’ll be refreshed, encouraged and challenged. You might even come out on the other side of Christmas with an extra measure of joy!
Blessings as you lead your family with grace this holiday season!
Mentioned in this podcast:
Discipline That Connects with Your Child's Heart online course
Sibling Conflict online course
What Causes Anger Issues in a Child? | Ep. 46
Nov 11, 2020
What do you do when your child gets angry? What causes anger issues in a child? When kids respond with angry, aggressive behavior, stress and fear are often the underlying emotions. Children who have experienced trauma often react with heightened fear responses.
In this podcast episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, continue their conversation with Lisa Qualls about parenting kids from hard places. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. In today’s episode, they talk about the importance of nurturing to connect, attach, and create safety with your child.
“When we nurture a child we are really disarming that fear response. We’re bringing them into a calm space where they feel and know that they are precious and loved.” -Lisa Qualls
As parents, we can learn to understand our child’s fear and how it affects their body. With some basic tools and preparation, you can work to get ahead of your child’s needs and help them avoid a heightened state of fear. You can bring regulation and calm to your child through thoughtful nurture: bringing them close and meeting their needs.
In this episode you will:
hear practical ways to nurture your child, even when they are angry
learn how cortisol affects your child's body
discover tools to meet kids’ sensory needs
learn how to disarm fear and meet the physical need
Mentioned in this episode:
The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment
Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development
“One Thankful Mom” - Lisa Qualls’ website
The Adoption Connection - Lisa Qualls’ podcast
Connected Families Comprehensive Sensory Activities List
50 Self-Regulation Activities to Empower Your Child to Calm
Parenting Kids from Hard Places with Unique Needs | Ep. 45
Nov 04, 2020
Are you parenting a child through adoption or foster care? Are you struggling with bonding to your child or their attachment to you? Your feelings of isolation and discouragement can be very real and overwhelming.
As an adoptive parent, maybe you’ve experienced a heightened sense of grief as you search for answers in unfamiliar parenting territory. If you are looking for practical hope, you will find both solidarity and strategies here for your parenting journey.
NOTE: Even if you are not parenting a child through adoption or foster care, we encourage you to take the time to listen. You will undoubtedly begin to understand the complexities your friends who have adopted experience daily. You may even pick up a few tips that can be applied in your own family!
On today’s podcast:
Today on the Connected Families Podcast, co-founders Jim and Lynne Jackson interview special guest, Lisa Qualls. Lisa and her husband are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment.
As a seasoned biological parent, Lisa did not anticipate the extent of the trauma and intense behavior in her children who joined their family through adoption. While witnessing these extreme behaviors, she watched the foundation of her family begin to crumble. After finding new hope and new resources in Dr. Purvis’ book, The Connected Child, the idea for The Connected Parent was born. This book combines real-life strategies taken from Dr. Karyn Purvis’ knowledge, with experiences from Lisa’s everyday life.
Listen as Jim and Lynne discuss the foundations of the Connected Families Framework with Lisa. Together they also explore the mission of the Karyn Purvis Institute, and the importance of the foundation of safety and attachment.
In this episode you will:
find hope and guidance in parenting children from hard placesreceive practical ideas for connecting with your struggling childdiscover the power of using “simple scripts” in your parentinghear about the importance of self-calm in becoming a safe parent learn more about the Connected Families Framework
Mentioned in this episode:
Connected Families FrameworkThe Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and AttachmentKaryn Purvis Institute of Child Development“One Thankful Mom” - Lisa Qualls’ websiteThe Adoption Connection - Lisa Qualls’ podcast
Enjoy Your Children the Way You Always Wanted To | Ep. 44
Sep 23, 2020
Are you scrambling to find clarity and help in your parenting? Are you struggling to find practical tools that bring lasting change? Do you wish you enjoyed your children more? Discover the power of connection and the hope of restoring a more peaceful relationship with your child!
How one mom learned to enjoy her children
Today’s guest is Emily, an alum of the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course. Emily and her husband have three boys. They experienced many of the typical challenges parents often face, as well as a rough transition in the adoption of their third son. The stress of this transition was causing intense behavior in her children, and Emily knew she needed a different way to discipline than the way she had disciplined prior to their adoption.
After hearing from friends who attended a workshop led by Jim and Lynne Jackson, Emily knew this was the way she wanted to parent. She signed up for the DTC online course, and discovered the power of the Connected Families framework. In the course she learned the importance of self-evaluation: “What’s going on in me as a parent?” She also gained a more empathetic view of her children, and found that the way God relates to us can inspire how we connect with our children.
Instead of trying to fix her kids’ behavior, Emily began using wisdom to guide her children toward the gifts that God instilled in them. She saw her children soften toward her, and toward the message of the gospel of Jesus’ love.
Bringing God's grace to your parenting
Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they share Emily’s story. Everything we do and teach at Connected Families flows through the ideas that we present in this online course. In short: it is a way of parenting that brings God’s grace and truth into the daily interactions with your children.
In this episode you will:
Discover how to build a foundation of connectedness and attachment with your child.Learn the importance of finding the gift gone awry; of looking at the gifting beneath the misbehavior, and helping your children use their gifts the way God designed.Hear how the framework can provide unity of vision with your spouse in parenting.Find hope that you can enjoy your children the way you’ve always wanted to.
Mentioned in this episode:
Ephesians 2:10
Feeling burned out at the end of the day? Does parenting (and discipline) leave you feeling overwhelmed and discouraged? If you are feeling "parenting burnout" there is help and hope.
Perhaps you will identify with our guests today, Nate and Amanda. This couple joins us to discuss the burnout parents often face in the discipline process with their kids.
What does parenting burnout look like?
Like so many couples, Nate and Amanda were enthusiastic and confident before their children were born. They were ready with ideas about how they would parent and connect with their children. Yet, like many of us, they discovered that the reality of parenting did not always match those expectations. They had great intentions, but struggled to put those intentions into action.
As parents, we can get tired and discouraged. Do you feel yourself grasping for control and wanting an immediate fix for your child’s behavior? Often the desire to get the right behavior from our kids can impede the relationship and cause us to lose opportunities to connect.
What’s going on in me?
Amanda and Nate found new hope and perspective after taking the Discipline That Connects online course. They learned to build a foundation of safety for their children by asking themselves, “What is going on in me?” Amanda noticed that her anxiety about her children’s future caused more exhaustion and brought more tension to the situation.
By implementing the practical and biblical strategies they learned together in the course, Nate and Amanda began walking a new path to decrease stress and bring energy back to their parenting.
Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they talk with Nate and Amanda about the DTC course, and a long term vision for parenting that builds safety and connection. Hear about our unique combination of a biblical framework and a practical science-based approach that can totally shift how you view discipline, and help you build connection with your kids.
In this episode you will:
Discover how to parent from a place of peace and calm.Learn the value of staying in the moment (and avoid catastrophizing!).Hear practical examples from parents who have been through the course, and how it helped them create more connection with their kids.Learn the power of do-overs and developing new brain pathways to help kids make better choices.Get an overview of the Connected Families framework.
Want to learn more? Jim recorded this 38-minute audio thinking about dads (although moms can listen too!). If your wife has recently been digging into our material and is urging you to “get on board!” this is a great place to start!
Parenting from a Place of Fear
Sep 09, 2020
“My kids will never grow up to be responsible!” “I am a terrible parent, and my child and I will never get along!” Are you parenting from a place of fear? Even catastrophizing a situation? Do you find yourself replaying negative thoughts in your mind about yourself and your child?
You are absolutely not alone! It’s easy to let fears about our parenting and our kids grip us and cause anxiety. Toxic beliefs can affect our own hearts, and the hearts of our children. These beliefs are like a recording that plays over and over in our head. We hear a voice that says we don’t measure up, or we make negative assumptions about our kids, and we act out on those beliefs.
This kind of thinking can cause us to parent from a place of fear. Your intentions are probably good. You want to become more aware of what’s going on inside your heart, and guide your children from a place of calm and peace.
One mom's story of parenting from a place of fear
Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), in an honest conversation about why it is so important to identify our toxic beliefs and replace them with grace-filled truth. Learn practical steps you can take to tame these beliefs and lead your family without fear.
Also joining us is Rebecca, a mom who took our Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online parenting course. Rebecca shares the impact of this course, and how over time it improved her connection with her children. Listen as she shares her struggles with her own fears and toxic beliefs, and how she learned to replace those beliefs with thoughts that encourage safety and connection.
In this episode, you will:
Gain insight into why we sometimes parent from fear, and wisdom in working toward parenting from joy and peace.Learn to identify toxic beliefs, take those thoughts captive, and replace them with grace-filled truth. Hear practical ways to model self-calming strategies to your kids.Discover more about the Connected Families Framework, and how to build the foundation for connection and safety with your kids.
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
What to Do When Kids Are Scared of the World Around Them | Ep. 41
Jul 29, 2020
Are your kids scared of the world around them? How are you talking about anxiety with your kids these days?
In current times coping is harder, and there seems to be more reasons to worry than usual. You may experience tension when your family gathers because everyone views what's happening in our world through different lenses, and with different opinions.
Relationships with some of the most important people in your lives seem at risk. It can be hard to talk about things that concern or upset us.
When we are anxious, our kids are the first to know. Kids have a keen radar that senses when things are off in our world. When their radar picks up anxiety, the anxiety spreads.
In today’s episode, we discuss the anxiety that can come from things we can’t control, the things that happen outside our walls: Social unrest, pandemics, politics, and school policies and decisions.
We WILL have trouble in this world
Jesus promises we will have trouble in this world. In the midst of such trouble, you have a unique opportunity to empower your kids to be thoughtful and compassionate in their relationships with others. Learning to approach your kids with grace and wisdom can help keep your family grounded, and growing in God’s love and purposes, during uncertain times.
This podcast is the fourth and final episode in a four-part series about anxiety. Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, together with close colleague and marriage and family therapist, Chad Hayenga, discuss this relevant topic from a faith-filled, biblically-oriented perspective.
In this episode
This episode is packed full of rich conversation and practical insights about tough topics. In this episode you will:
Explore habits that keep you grounded and help you “take every thought captive.”Discover how to have honest conversations with your kids with a “Big Picture” perspective.Learn how to communicate to your kids: “You are called and capable of figuring out even these really challenging problems!”Hear practical ways to have conversations about big feelings with respect and kindness.Gain insight in how to teach kids to wrestle well with their fears, listen better, and learn from the perspectives of others.
The reign and the rule of Jesus’ kingdom is as present and powerful now more than ever. We are all called to be part of this heavenly kingdom. Whatever trouble you are experiencing, the power and force of God's goodness and grace are the most potent ways to overcome anxiety.
Mentioned in this podcast:
John 16:33Colossians 3:12,132 Corinthians 10:5John 18:36Philippians 4:6-8Philippians 4:11Matthew 6:25-34Numbers 6:24-26Family Meetings OverviewIs Your Child Refusing to Do Schoolwork?Free Resources from Connected Families
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
Want to learn more? This content from this podcast is also available in our blog post called: Teach Your Kids to Trust God...In Times of Unrest and Pandemic.
In our online course, The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom., you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family. Join us today!
Here is what Mark and Kim had to say after finishing the course:
We wish we’d had this training many years ago when starting our parenting journey, but we’ve found that it’s never too late to connect with each other and build up our family team. Changing our perspective and approaching our children (even the ones who are now young adults!) with light-hearted curiosity instead of judgmental lectures is a game-changer.
What to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40
Jul 22, 2020
Mealtime battles, bedtime drama, homework struggles... Can you relate to these anxiety triggers in your home? Often there are deeper emotions under the surface, for both parents and children, that contribute to these conflicts.
When we acknowledge and validate the emotions that drive our children’s anxiety, we can better equip them to self-regulate. Validating emotions also helps us avoid anxiety-producing power struggles. This equips us to approach these struggles in a way that empowers our children to feel safe, loved, and capable.
We are excited to bring you episode three in our four-part Anxiety Series. Today Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, together with Chad Hayenga, marriage and family therapist, dig deeper on what some of the anxiety triggers might be in your home. Listen in as they talk about separation anxiety, homework, school, mealtimes, and more.
In this episode about anxiety triggers you’ll learn:
Practical ideas to reduce power struggles at mealtimeHow to approach homework battles with compassion while encouraging responsibility at the same timeHow to validate your child’s anxious feelings Ways to empower your children to feel safe and speak up for what they need
Mentioned in this podcast:
7 Practical Tips for Picky Eaters
Raise a Healthy Child Who Is a Joy to Feed- Ellyn Satter
Responding with Compassion When Kids Don't Make the Grade
Practical Help for Families Struggling with Separation Anxiety
Bedtime Struggles
Connected Families FREE Resources
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
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How to Teach Your Child Not to Be Scared | Ep. 39
Jul 15, 2020
How do you teach your child not to be scared? Bedtime, meals, learning at home, performance anxiety, and separation anxiety can all be sources of anxiety for kids. This is especially true for kids who may be highly sensitive. Kids who struggle with anxiety are often more “on alert” than other children, and don’t always assess danger well.
Kids who are anxious can also get their cues from parents. The more we try to create an environment that keeps kids out of a highly-alert state, the more sense of peace and calm the child can feel. In our previous podcast episode, we discussed how modeling a calm spirit is a vital part of calming an anxious child.
In this episode, you’ll learn how to empower your children to constructively work through their anxiety, and to experience God’s peace and purpose for their lives.
This podcast is the second in a four-part series about anxiety. Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, together with close colleague, and marriage and family therapist, Chad Hayenga, explore some of the best ways to encourage kids when they experience anxiety.
Among the many practical tools in this podcast, you’ll learn:
3 “Don’ts” that can add to your child’s anxiety.3 “Do’s” that can equip your kids with confidence-boosting skills to handle anxiety.How to help your kids feel empowered with a teamwork mentality, and in their God-given identity to be brave.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Philippians 4:6,7Ephesians 2:10Joshua 1:9The Opposite of Worry: The Playful Parenting Approach to Childhood Anxieties and Fears (includes the “second chicken” story mentioned in today’s podcast episode)Helping Your Highly Sensitive ChildHow to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound KidsBuilding Your Inner Coach-Brett LedbetterDan Siegel: Name it to Tame it
Wondering if you have a highly sensitive child? Check out the sister article for this podcast: Helping Your Highly Sensitive Child.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
My Child is Afraid of Everything | Ep. 38
Jul 08, 2020
Do you feel like your child is afraid of everything? Where does anxiety come from in our kids? This is a huge struggle parents often face, especially when tensions are high in the world around us.
A survey Connected Families conducted in spring of 2020 revealed that 70% of families in the CF community have reported elevated levels of anxiety in recent months. If you are experiencing this, you are not alone!
Kids’ struggles and misbehavior can increase everyone's anxiety and the tension in the home. Our own anxious thoughts about children's misbehavior can cause us to try harder to control kids, which discourages them and escalates the problem. Our own anxious thoughts about this behavior can cause discouragement in our children, and can also cause us to become more controlling.
You have good intentions to help your child manage their big emotions. What can you do to wrestle well with this issue of anxiety in the home?
Today’s podcast is the first in a four-part series about anxiety. Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) and Chad Hayenga (MA, LMFT, CLC) discuss the root of our anxiety struggles both for kids and for us as parents.
In this episode:
Learn about the cycle that can cause anxiety in both you and your kids.Think practically about your anxiety and how to model healthy habits to your kids. Discover how to take control of negative thoughts and develop a more peaceful mindset.Identify the Antidote Cycle for growing away from the anxious habits we have.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Philippians 4:6-9
1 John 4:18
2 Corinthians 10:5
How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids
Want to learn more? Our blog post "Are You Micromanaging Your Kids?" Here's How to Stop gives more practical and helpful tips to stop parenting from a place of anxiety.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
In our online course, The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom., you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family.
What to Say When Your Child Makes Outrageous Statements | Ep. 37
Jul 01, 2020
Have you ever heard an outrageous statement from your child? Outrageous statements come in all shapes and sizes and can often trigger disbelief or even outrage in parents. Perhaps that’s why they’re called outrageous statements!
It’s tempting for us, as parents, to respond to these situations with immediate correction or a lecture. However, this may result in unhelpful arguments. Hard emotions are often underneath our kid’s outrageous statements. How can we respond with love, connection, and safety to effectively help them grow in wisdom and responsibility?
Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they discuss the power of lighthearted questions in a conversational model that will guide wisdom-building responses in your kids. They also discuss the recently released online course from Connected Families called The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom.
In today’s episode, you’ll discover:
A useful analogy to help you “dig deeper” to understand your child’s underlying emotions.The power of lighthearted questions to build wisdom in your kids rather than “fix” the behavior.A practical conversational model that creates safety in relationships when confronted with outrageous statements from your kids.
Remember, your child is often frustrated and discouraged when they say outrageous things. Learning to find what is going on underneath the surface will better equip you to lead your family with grace.
If you want to hear more about what to do when your kids say outrageous things, check out Stop the Crazy All-or-Nothing Thinking with These 4 Steps.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
In our newest online course The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom. you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family. Join us today!
How to Have a Great Summer Without Pestering Your Kids | Ep. 36
Jun 24, 2020
Are you feeling anxious about this summer? Summer can be a fantastic opportunity to connect with your kids, but it can also present new challenges. You want to have a great summer, but aren’t quite sure how to get there.
Uncertainty and disappointment add an extra level of stress, especially with the new reality of cancelled activities and plans. In this podcast we will explore how to create a sense of teamwork in your family so summer is enjoyable for everyone.
We, as parents, may also have our own fears about navigating difficult battles, such as screen time and boredom. We don’t want to spend the all our time nagging, exasperating, and arguing with our kids! Is it even possible to create a memorable summer while, at the same time, helping our kids grow in wisdom and responsibility?
Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they discuss how to build an atmosphere of teamwork and connection with your kids that will equip them and set them up for success.
In this podcast, you'll learn to:
Think through your own best hopes for summer.
Be thoughtful and proactive in naming potential problem areas.
Be intentional and realistic about your summer goals.
If you want to learn more, this article complements this podcast well, and has a great story of how a mom used questions to help avoid a power struggle with her toddler.
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
In our online course, Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding, we teach parents how to teach kids The Peace Process. This process equips kids to work through their arguments without your constant supervision and refereeing. Join us! Your kids will thank you.
Are You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35
Jun 17, 2020
Does it seem like all you do is nag your kids? Are you frustrated because this is the sixth time you have asked your child to take out the garbage? Nagging and arguing can become the frustrating norm in many of families.
Parents have good intentions. We want our kids to grow up to be responsible, right? Our fear and anxiety that our children will not grow up to be responsible adults can cause us to become controlling. This kind of projected negativity has the potential to affect our child’s identity.
In fact, brain science reveals that these power struggles can be damaging to our relationship with our kids. Kids may embrace this projected negative identity, which could hinder their ability to grow in God’s good purposes for them.
Join Stacy Bellward (ACC), Chad Hayenga (MA,LMFT, CLC), and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they discuss what it looks like to cut down on nagging and help our kids grow in wisdom and responsibility. They also discuss the recently released online course from Connected Families called The Power of Questions: Less Arguing. More Wisdom.
In this episode you will:
learn how to break patterns of defensiveness.discover the power of curious questions to create SAFE, productive conversations. receive a 4-step plan for holding kids accountable.hear an overview of this exciting new course!
Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
In our online course "The Power of Questions" you will learn the art of asking questions that build internal wisdom and character in your kids, and create a culture of teamwork in your family. Join us today!
How to Put Screens Back in Their Place | Ep. 34
May 28, 2020
You want to be intentional about screen time with your kids, but you’ve got an uphill battle! The pandemic isn’t making it any easier either. If you’re struggling with how to be intentional about screens, especially when your kids require them more than ever, this is the podcast episode for you.
Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they dive into the challenges of our kids and their screen time. They discuss how best to approach screen time from a place of connection and guidance, not just enforcing rules. These ideas will equip you to lead your family with grace as you help your children feel capable and responsible when it comes to screen time.
In this podcast you’ll:
Learn techniques and skills to connect with your child during the heat of the moment.Hear role plays involving real-life screen time conflict scenarios.Be given tools and scripts to work with your child to problem solve the issue of screen time together.
Note: This podcast has a companion blog post. We encourage you to digest both, as there is different and complimenting content in each.
Like what you hear? Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
What To Do When Kids Interrupt Important Conference Calls | Ep. 33
May 19, 2020
Working at home can be challenging! And exasperating. In this difficult season where many parents are juggling kids and working from home, our “new normal” is anything but normal. Parents are asking, "How do I stop kids interrupting conference calls?"
It’s hard to know how to respond to the challenges of interrupted conference calls. But this can be a great opportunity to help kids feel both loved and successful. Applying the Connected Families Framework for parenting can equip you to Connect, Coach, and Correct from a foundation of Safety. (This article is also available as an audio or video download.)
Read this article and apply what you’ve learned to experience a more peaceful conference call!
https://youtu.be/a7wsyxYjndU
What should you do first when kids interrupt an important conference call?
Outside of the immediate challenge, it’s helpful to consider, “What’s going on in me? How do I view this? Am I responsible for having a perfect child?”
Feeling shame and embarassment about your child’s behavior during a conference call causes you to react anxiously, which increases your child’s anxiety and neediness. It may be that a light-hearted “sorry for the delay” to participants is appropriate, but avoid the temptation to repeatedly or emphatically apologize. That’s stressful for you and your child.
If you are expecting a certain behavior, but haven’t helped your kids both value it and practice it, it’s a setup for frustration!
It’s also important to thoughtfully consider, “What’s it like to be my child when I get on a conference call?”
Having an unavailable parent can be tough on kids’ anxiety levels!
Research shows that our brains release oxytocin under stressful conditions, especially in social isolation. These elevated oxytocin levels drive an urgency to get help when we feel stressed or anxious. Your child’s demands may be a sign of elevated stress levels.
In addition, up until age three or four, a child’s worldview generally revolves around himself. That child will probably not be thinking of your personal comfort during that important call for work.
Considering all this, it doesn’t have to be perfect! Ditch those profuse apologies, take a deep breath, and remember that these are great opportunities to extend God’s grace and mercy to yourself, and to your child.
Want to avoid kids interrupting conference calls? Be proactive.
Thoughtful and intentional connection can go a long way! Before your meeting, prepare by connecting well with your child - even if it is just three minutes. Let them know you are delighted in them. Make meaningful eye contact. Fill their cup! Enable them to be peaceful so they can head off to be independent.
One mom, who is working from home, stated, “I have been trying to connect with my kids through short bursts of focused, joy-filled attention frequently throughout the day. It seems to be helping them to play independently for longer periods of time, which is helping me to get things done that I need to.”
It probably won’t be helpful to just tell kids not to interrupt. It may even cause more anxiety! Coach them and build skills ahead of time to demonstrate what you want them to do instead. If you are expecting a certain behavior, but haven’t helped your kids both value it and practice it, it’s a setup for frustration!
How can you set your child up for success?
Proactive coaching goes a long way in preventing interruptions:
Teach your children appropriate ways to ask for attention, like a tap on the arm. Help them practice this new skill by pretending you are on an important call. Give special signs (thumbs up/wink) that communicate: “I see you and I care!” If they want to show you something, let them know they can put their project or drawing in a pre-designated “waiting spot” until the call is over. Keeping this promise, and attending to it right away when the call is done, will build trust.Teach the importance of peaceful waiting. This can be practiced and modeled throughout the ebb and flow of daily life. Teach conflict resolution to decrease the need for your help in a tussle. Check out our Sibling Conflict online course. One mom who is taking the course said she would previously run in during a sibling conflict as the “judge.” She began implementing some of the skills taught in the Sibling Conflict course. Later on, during another conflict, the mom was going to step in to help a conflict, but her seven-year-old said, “I got this mom! We can solve this!”
Evaluate which proactive strategy works best for your child.
After coaching and practicing, evaluate what works best. Problem-solve based on what you learn from the times when things go better.
Other practical tips that may help:
Avoid having kids do school work during your calls. Keep a bin of toys (new or old favorites) reserved only for when you are on calls. Maybe even have a unique bin for each child.Designate special separate spaces for kids during calls.
Set boundaries and expectations before the call.
An important part of being proactive is to set boundaries and expectations before the call:
Ask your child, “What’s important to you when I am on a call?”It’s equally important to ask, “What do you think is important to me, and to the person I’m talking to, in this meeting?” Offer two choices for activities. If possible and appropriate, satisfy your child’s curiosity by allowing him to meet the caller. Set clear boundaries by putting a sign on the door. One sign read, "Mom is WORKING. Do NOT disturb unless the house is on fire or someone is bleeding. A lot." Another option: Offer incentives! Let them know that if they don’t interrupt, they can make a zoom call to a grandparent or friend. Remind them of this just before the call.
“After all this, my child is STILL interrupting my work calls!”
Even with proactive coaching, your child (or spouse) may still interrupt. Sometimes this is going to happen no matter what you do! Remember this viral video of a parent conference call that did not go as planned?
When it all falls apart and it's time to correct during the call, remember to try to decrease your child's anxiety, not increase it, so the interaction doesn't escalate to an outburst in front of your colleagues!
Here are some ideas to let your child know, “I’m for you, not against you,” even when they've messed up:
Offer a quick hug. Affirm them for whatever success they had (assuming they have spent at least some time trying to play independently.) Smile as you offer two clear "You can" choices such as, "You can hold my hand and sit on the floor without talking, or take a toy and lay on my bed til I'm done."
If the interruptions were clearly not at an acceptable level, afterward you can guide your child to do a do-over. They can practice a respectful arm pat interruption and then quickly and quietly return to play. This will help them feel more confident about what to do next time.
Encouragement (not shame!), will build their identity of "I'm learning and getting more 'grown up' all the time!" And your affection will grow that vital belief, "I am loved no matter what!" Your child's confidence and security might be the most important accomplishment of your conference call!
We are here for you! Please let us know how we can help. We would love to hear how some of these ideas have worked for your family! Email your prayer requests and success stories to info@connectedfamilies.org.
Prayer
Father, thank you for helping me juggle so much. Help me to love my kids in the middle of the messes. Comfort me with a sense of your Holy Spirit coming alongside me with wisdom and mercy in these difficult times. In Jesus name, Amen.
Help Your Struggling Child Grieve His Pre-Coronavirus Life | Ep. 31
May 06, 2020
Like many of us, your child might be grieving his pre-coronavirus life. This challenging time can bring strong emotions to the surface in our kids (and in us as parents). These emotions can be signs of a child's underlying grief. And difficulty in expressing that grief.
Read on to learn why it’s important to allow your children to grieve, and healthy ways to help them process their grief. This article is also available as a video or audio download.
Why is it important for our children to grieve?
We’re hearing from a lot of parents whose kids still aren’t adjusting well to the new challenges of “Stay-at-Home” orders and social distancing guidelines.
Resistance to homework. Power struggles. Tantrums. Withdrawn children.
These are just some of the challenges parents are facing. Add to this list the responsibility of managing school work while trying to work from home and you’ve got a recipe for stress and discouragement.
Parents tell us they’re trying to help their kids adjust but making little progress. It’s a tough load!
Grief is real! Our kids, right along with the rest of us, are dealing with grief right now. It feels unnatural and even overwhelming to lose our normal life rhythms.
Our kids are likely grieving the loss of school friends and other activities. Their lives have been turned upside-down and they are probably limited in their ability to process those feelings.
Many of us can probably relate to this struggling mom:
“Dear Connected Families, I need help figuring out how to help my four year old manage his grief over the loss of his wonderful life at preschool. His teachers at his preschool are so loving and he has wonderful friends there. He misses his teachers and friends and wants to hug them and play with them. I’m doing what I can, I bought new puzzles and books. I’m trying to fill his love tank but he has such intense needs and I have a two year old as well. Please help.”
Are we distracting our children from their grief?
As your child struggles, your first inclination may be to distract him with “happy things.” But you don't want to teach your child to sweep their feelings aside and pretend they don’t exist. Instead, view this as an opportunity to teach a valuable lesson in dealing with disappointment.
You probably don't blatantly order your child to toughen up. However, that might be the message your child hears. If you put more energy into trying to relieve your child’s disappointment than you do into validating it, you may drive the mourning inward.
Kids need permission to feel sad. Sometimes kids have big feelings of grief. But when invalidated, those feelings get locked up inside and come out in twisted ways. They can only intensify an already difficult situation.
Kids need to feel safe and be given permission to express their grief.
How to help your child process grief
Hard as it is, don't try to help your kids “get over it.” The best gift you can give them is to be present and to sit with them in their emotions and discontent.
Jesus told us, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
There is a direct link between mourning and comfort.
The term here for mourning comes from the Greek word, pentheus. It means to express externally what’s being experienced internally.
When the grief is deep, it may take some time for even the most mature among us to express the deep things that are pent up inside.
God is patient with us when we grieve. Likewise, our patience and presence with our kids during their grief will help them learn to understand and navigate their feelings. Our patient presence with our kids communicates in a tangible way that God is present with them too.
God gives us safety and permission to mourn. As we mourn, we are then able to receive God’s comfort.
Grieving in a healthy way
Notice how this mom, who is a coaching client, helped her 9-year-old daughter (who does not like questions about her feelings!) to grieve in a healthy way:
“They announced today that our schools will now be closed for the rest of the year. Blaire was SUPER upset and angry. She was slamming things on the table, giving me the evil eye and stating all the things she wouldn't do. I was able to stay calm and remember that she needs me to not take it personally and stay safe.
She ran to a private spot. A little while later I joined her and gave her a piece of gum. I didn't ask her questions, but just said ‘I know this stinks and isn't what you want. I'm not excited about it either. But we will get through it together.’
Later at dinner I pulled out our feelings chart and we each went around and pointed at all of the feelings we felt today and why. AND Blaire actually did it! It was such a great and logical way for us to talk about feelings in a non-threatening way.”
Like this mom, we can give permission to our kids to say their hard feelings. We can safely communicate to them, “That must be really hard! Is there anything I can do to be with you in it?” This begins to unlock their feelings and opens the door to start talking. We can then begin problem solving ways to manage these difficult emotions.
Practical ideas for helping your child express grief:
Paper plate activity (adapt for teenagers) - draw different emotions on paper plates. This will help kids understand that anger often covers up deeper feelings of anxiety, loss, hurt, sadness, and insecurity.Hands-on activities - encourage younger children to draw their feelings, or even use play-doh.Snuggle with them when they are feeling sad.Use imaginative play to express their disappointment. Talk about what is good, and what’s not good about the situation, and the child’s feelings related to each thing. Then, discuss what you and your child can do about the parts that are not good.Parent coaching may give you insight into how to best support your child/ren during this difficult time. It might be the best investment you make for your family!
Kids need to feel safe and be given permission to express their grief.
It is natural for your kids to be grieving their pre-coronavirus lives. Your child’s need to grieve and mourn are opportunities for you to be present with him just as God is present with us. You might be his best helper as you give him permission to mourn. As a result, we can all receive the comfort of God’s presence, and His purposes for us, as we navigate this challenging season.
Prayer for parents of grieving children:
Lord, I want to see my children the way You see them. Would you help open my eyes to see what is behind their struggling? Give me grace and kindness as I parent today. Help me to meet each of my children where they are and sit with them in their discouragement.
Please let us know how we can pray for you and continue to come alongside you during this time. We are here for you, and we are praying for you! Email your prayer requests to info@connectedfamilies.org.
How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids | Ep. 30
Apr 28, 2020
You are not a bad parent. Start learning how to stop parenting out of guilt or anxiety.
This content is also available in an audio version.
When we’re in crisis, the voices built most deeply in us come out. Sometimes that can be positive. Other times it turns self-critical.
Instead of blaming ourselves, we can remind our hearts that we are created in God’s image to do good works. We can be vessels of God’s grace and presence to our families during this difficult time.
Look for the bright spots in your parenting
As hard as it may be to see at times, there are bright spots in your parenting.
It’s almost never as bad it could be.
Let’s get a little deep for a moment: There is a distance between “as bad as it could be” and what is actually happening. The efforts you are making to bring God’s grace to your family are what is creating that distance. In other words, things are not as bad as they could be because of the things you are doing well!
Focus on what you are doing well as a parent and allow God to grow those moments each day.
Tips to grow your parenting without shame
You can do better than mere survival during challenging times. You can even grow your parenting and come out better on the other side.
Here are some practical tips:
Slow down, take deep breaths, trusting that Jesus is fully in control and that He never leaves us.Look at the opportunities. Look for “yes” moments that are now possible because of less time constraints.Look at the successes. Ask yourself, “When did I connect well with one of my kids?” or “When did I hold it together when I could have lost it and what helped me to achieve that?”
In other words, things are not as bad as they could be because of the things you are doing well!
One mom’s parenting success during “stay-at-home” orders
Enjoy this story from Abby, mom of 3 from Minnesota, who has been working hard to connect well with her kids. She is learning to choose grace and be present with her kids in the midst of life’s daily messes:
Now let me just tell you on Day 1... oh wow! That day was HARD. I am an extreme extrovert. I gotta see my people. And then there was the FEAR. Fear of the unknown. Fear of the virus. Not being able to know, to plan, to execute our daily routine. That first day there were tears and screaming. The anxiety - not just mine but my kids' - was thick and oppressive.
But I had a change in mindset over the next 2-3 days. I realized that we are "all in this together,” and EVERYONE else was having a similar experience, so there was nothing I could do but truly surrender it all.
Everything that was most important to me was under one roof. So it turns out I did have my people. And I still had a Jesus who I knew was walking alongside me in all of this, and I had the framework that Connected Families had given me.
I do struggle to stay calm but I read Jim’s post where he said, “Whenever I feel anxious I literally tell myself, ‘Jim, this isn’t helping. You can’t solve it. But you can breathe deep and remember that Jesus promised to never leave you nor forsake you. (Deep breath.) That’s it. Do it again.’” I did this.
You’re not a bad parent
You are not alone. In your community, and the world as a whole, there are millions of parents walking through this together. Struggling does not make you a bad parent.
Every family has unique challenges and trials to navigate and it can be exhausting. We see you. We hear you. And we want to walk alongside you. Share your prayer requests with us - we’d love to pray for you.
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Prayer
Lord, I ask you to fill me with an ability to see bright spots. To see past the difficulties, the failures, the discouragement. With your grace illuminate those bright spots so I can rejoice and see what you are doing right in our midst. I pray your blessing on our family today. In Jesus name, Amen.
“God is Always Up to Something!” | Ep. 27
Apr 08, 2020
NOTE: This content is available as a video, a blog post (below), or a 7-minute podcast. We trust this will serve every situation and learning style well.
Here at Connected Families we realize this is a tough time for many in our community and in the world as a whole. In response to the current pandemic, we sent out a survey last week to hear, “What is it like to be you?” The response was overwhelming, with a thousand parents responding in just a little over a day. People shared a wide range of responses:
About 15% of you said you are doing quite well, finding less stress, and deeper connection in the slower pace.
Another 15% said that stress is about normal.
Still, another 70% of you are feeling more stress than usual, some of you a LOT more than usual.
We read through each of your responses, and what you told us you needed was practical encouragement in short, bite-sized chunks. So, today, we want to share a word of encouragement with you - You are NOT alone in this!
Jesus “GETS” you!
Hebrews 4:15 & 16 says,“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”
It helps to have a little context to really take in this verse. Temptations often have more power under stress. And Jesus had more than His share of stress, some of which you may relate to right now:
He was so exhausted that He fell asleep, in a boat, in a storm.
He “managed” 12 disciples who often acted like selfish children.
He navigated a stressful religious and political climate.
He was primarily homeless during the 3 years of his ministry, and had no regular income.
So basically…. He gets us, because He has walked in our shoes! He knows how hard this is for many of you right now.
No matter what’s going on in your life right now, Jesus is with you and cares about you! Regardless of what the constant conflict, messy house, or undone checklist looks like. So how does knowing that “Jesus gets us!” help in a tangible way during this unprecedented situation, especially when you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed?
Stress happens when there’s a gap between expectations and your ability to meet those expectations.
What does this mean for me, right now?
Here are a few practical ideas to help you keep things in perspective:
First of all, lower the expectations you have for yourself. Stress happens when there’s a gap between expectations and your ability to meet those expectations. Maybe you’re feeling pressure to make this a purposeful, connective time with your family. Or shine the light of Jesus to those around you. Or just get that to-do list done. Jesus exceeded expectations so you don’t have to meet your own!
Next, consider what expectations you have that might feel burdensome, and release yourself from those expectations!
Emphasize God’s mercy in the middle of the mess. Claim God’s abundant, overflowing mercy during your messiest, angriest moments. And say it out loud! During an angry power struggle with one of our kids, Lynne had a “Holy Spirit insight,” and said it out loud. “You know what I think God just said to me? ...that He has so much mercy on us in our struggle! He knows how hard it is for you and I to get along. And He loves us.” They both experienced God’s merciful peace. So, in the middle of the craziness, take a breath and remember that God is with you, and say that out loud.
God has abundant mercy for us.
God has abundant mercy and good purposes for us in all things. One of the most memorable sermons we’ve ever heard was the spontaneous testimony of a young man in a small, lively church. As this young man was asked by the pastor to share a word, and he stood up and said, “One thing I’ve learned is that God is always up to somethin’ and it’s always somethin’ good!” He shared numerous examples, and after each one he joyfully repeated, “God is always up to somethin’ and it’s always somethin’ good!”
During many difficult times in our life together we have consistently seen this truth remain. We know that God offers peace that passes understanding. And this peace has nothing to do with our circumstances.
So ask yourself this:
In this very difficult time, what might God be up to in my family?
When it’s all over, what have I learned from this time?
Has my family benefited from a slower pace of life?
Maybe what you’ll have learned is simply to lean into God’s very present mercy like you never have before. And what more valuable thing could any family learn?!
We are journeying with you.
Whatever your experience, we are journeying with you. While our children are grown and moved out, many on our staff have children of all ages and are navigating parenting challenges right alongside you. Our team loves to pray for the Connected Families community, so email us at info@connectedfamilies.org and let us know how we can pray for you. May God show you His mercy as you seek to lead your family with grace.
We’d like to close with a virtual blessing over you:
“Lord, we are so grateful that you are a God overflowing with mercy, flooding the generations with your mercy. And so we come to You boldly asking for grace and mercy to help in time of need. We ask You to speak to each family in their messiest, neediest moments to be their comfort and their come-alongside Holy Spirit help. We pray that you would help these parents and families release any burdensome expectations because you have exceeded all expectations with the gift of grace through Your Son. We are confident that You love to answer these prayers in Jesus’ name. Amen.”
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Guiding Kids to Right Their Wrongs | Ep. 26
Apr 01, 2020
When your kids misbehave, and you need to discipline them, have you considered what they are learning? Are they learning to submit to angry power? Or, perhaps, are they learning how to get better at hiding their misbehavior and sin? Guiding kids to right their wrongs is no easy task.
Most families have one child that demands more of our parenting energy. Is that child hearing an unspoken (or spoken!) message that he/she is a “problem child”?
Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into the “Correct” level of our framework - teaching the message, “You are responsible for your actions.” With plenty of practical applications and helpful stories from other parents, this podcast is packed with ideas for guiding kids to right their wrongs. These ideas will equip you to lead your family with grace as you guide your children towards reconciliation skills they will utilize for a lifetime.
In this podcast you’ll:
be given creative alternatives to yelling, time-outs, and punishment, while still holding your children accountable.explore how guiding our children to reconcile in a healthy way when they are younger can have a positive impact on their relationships both now and in the future. learn a value system for correcting your child that does not just focus on correcting behavior.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Galatians 6:1
Galatians 6:7
Like what you hear? Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)
Mentoring Our Kids in Skills, Wisdom and Faith | Ep. 25
Mar 25, 2020
What skills would you like your kids to have when they go out into the world? Should you drop what you're doing to bring them something they forgot? How can you prepare your kids for conflicts they will certainly encounter in their relationships, family, and work environments later in life? What does it look like to mentor our kids?
Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, explore what it means to have a vision for your family and give practical ideas for ways to mentor your kids in skills, wisdom, and faith.
In this podcast you’ll learn:
parenting skills that build emotional intelligence.how thoughtful questions and natural impacts can build wisdom. ideas to model faith and humility so we nurture our kids' faith in God’s grace and mercy.
Like what you hear? Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)
Connecting With Your Kids…Especially When They Struggle | Ep. 24
Mar 18, 2020
You may have heard, “Move TOWARD the struggling child.” This phrase might seem counter-intuitive. Often, when our child is struggling, the last thing we want to do is connect with them.
When we show love unconditionally, especially when our kids misbehave, they will then genuinely understand that our love cannot be earned. And that our love is not reserved exclusively for when they are obedient, helpful, or behaving in the way we want. Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they discuss what it looks like to make sure our kids know we not only love them unconditionally, but enjoy them.
In this podcast you’ll:
be given quick, easy “fly-by” ideas for connecting with your kids.learn strategies to help kids understand you still love them, in the middle of misbehavior.receive scripts and words to use that show empathy.hear a story from a mom whose empathy helped her connect with her daughter and get below her daughter’s anger.
Mentioned in this podcast: Zephaniah 3:17
Like what you hear? Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)
Walking in Peace and Joy with Your Kids | Ep. 23
Mar 11, 2020
We all want a peaceful home where kids feel safe. But sometimes safety is hard to attain, especially when life is stressful. How do we respond during hard parenting moments? How can we do better at walking in peace and joy with our kids? In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into creating a culture of safety at home. Applying what you learn as you listen can impact your family for generations to come.
In this podcast you’ll learn to:
look inward and ask the question, “What’s going on in ME?”.build a strong foundation for parenting, knowing who you are in Christ.show your kids, in a way they can understand, that you are a flawed human.communicate “You are safe with me,” in practical ways that can help your kids build a solid foundation on God’s grace and truth.
Mentioned in this podcast:
Blog post: Let Go of Shiny Grab Hold of GraceBlog post: How to Parent Together When You’re Total OppositesI Thessalonians 2 as a parenting chapter in the Bible
Like what you hear? Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)
Find Your Parenting Balance | Ep. 22
Mar 04, 2020
How do you define yourself as a parent? Do you feel stuck in your parenting and want to explore a new way? In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, are excited to introduce you to a structured framework for parenting that can help bring balance to your parenting. You CAN find balance between grace and consequences while teaching your kids wisdom, values, and faith.
This podcast can bring balance to your parenting:
learn the origins of the Connected Families Framework and how Jim and Lynne came up with the idea.be introduced to a structure you can use and follow in your parenting to better reach your child’s heart during the messes of daily life.be equipped with a model for restoration and grace to be used during discipline that will train your child to make right what they’ve made wrong.hear a personal story from our online course moderator, Stacy, who has learned to change the trajectory of relationships in her family by following the Connected Families Framework for parenting.
Mentioned in the podcast:
How to Parent Together When You're Total Opposites
Like what you hear? Don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode and others can find us more easily!
Do you feel like a visual reminder would help remind you of these four messages and principles in your parenting? We have just the thing. Check out our Connected Families Framework magnet and order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace during the messes of daily life. Order one today!
Families on Purpose | Ep. 21
Feb 05, 2020
The most successful companies usually have clear cut goals and strategies to accomplish those goals. However, most families float through life haphazardly. When families get dangerously off track, parents often say, “I just don’t know how we got here.” A lack of intentionality is often implicated when families’ find themselves sinking or even shipwrecked. In this podcast, Jim Jackson and Chad Hayenga will challenge you to have a plan to move your family forward with purpose.
In this podcast about family purpose you will:
Discover practical ways to keep this from happening to your familyBe inspired to instill a sense of purpose for your unique family to be a blessing in whatever ways God calls you, whether that's in big* or lots of smaller ways Hear Chad’s story of the surprising impact of repeated discussions around a simple question his family would continually use to evaluate their goals
Don’t miss these helpful ideas to guide your family away from shipwreck as you sail strongly toward God’s purposes.
*In this podcast Jim mentions a story that Donald Miller shares about a wealthy dad “buying an orphanage” for his family. We recognize the verbiage used by the man in the story could be off-putting. We pray the story behind the words can challenge you to consider how your family might embrace a greater purpose to bless others.
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
Your kids? They’re watching. ALL the time. | Ep. 20
Jan 29, 2020
In this podcast, Chad Hayenga and Jim Jackson will challenge you to think through what you’re modeling as you parent. They’ll equip you with natural, effective ways to “live your life out loud” in a manner that builds faith and wisdom in your kids. You’ll come away with:
practical tips on how to make prayer natural with your kids.ideas on how to guide great dinner table conversations.simple ways to keep kids engaged when you read the Bible.
You may be intimidated by the idea of leading your kids to Jesus. The staff at church seems so much better equipped, right? But in your everyday life, you are teaching, leading, guiding and discipling in both the big moments, the small ones, and a million in between. Your kids are watching you all the time. The question is, what are they learning?
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
Honoring Our Imperfect Dads | Ep. 19
Jan 22, 2020
If you’ve struggled in your relationship with one (or both!) of your parents, this podcast can give life-changing insight. Hurt and resentment left to brew under the surface can often perpetuate the effects of sin passing from one generation to another.
In this podcast, Jim shares his process of working through very difficult feelings and dynamics in his relationship with his dad. This enabled him to get to a place of an affectionate, grace-filled, restored relationship. As mentioned in this fall 2019 blog post, he learned to apply the Connected Families Framework with his own parents.
In this podcast:
You’ll learn practical ways to release bitterness, reconnect, and confront a parent about past hurts. You’ll be encouraged to replace bitterness with forgiveness, and disconnection with affection and honor. You’ll be equipped to set boundaries as needed.
As you learn to navigate your relationship with your earthly parents, you may even find your relationship with your heavenly Father growing deeper and more personal. In turn, this can permeate your own family for generations to come.
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
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When Doing My Best Isn’t Good Enough | Ep. 18
Jan 15, 2020
In this podcast episode, Jim and Chad take a deeper dive into the dynamics of dads’ good intentions with their kids. If you sometimes feel like you’re doing your best and it’s just not good enough, be encouraged and equipped by the ideas in this practical podcast.
In this podcast you’ll:
listen as Jim shares some helpful insights from his own relationship with his dad. hear a roleplay illustrating typical default parenting and the messages kids may actually be receiving.be given examples demonstrating how to communicate messages of grace and truth to your kids in clear and practical ways.
Whether you are a dad (or mom!) who’s raising toddlers, tweens, or teens these deep and heartfelt principles can help change the trajectory of your family for generations to come. We invite you to listen to the rest of this podcast series and be encouraged to lead your family with grace!
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox:
Leading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17
Jan 07, 2020
Join Jim Jackson, Connected Families co-founder, and Chad Hayenga, LMFT, Certified Life Coach and parent coach, for this first episode in a 5-part series for dads. Moms, of course you’re welcome to listen! But Jim and Chad will be addressing specific issues unique to dads.
Often dads are working outside the home and that can bring unique challenges. It’s easy to carry stress from work into the pressure cooker of home. Dads frequently, not always, feel they need to use strong authority to manage conflict in the family. The messages dads want to convey are often not the ones that kids receive. This can build disconnection and resentment in family relationships, despite the best intentions.
In this podcast you’ll:
learn 4 principles for parenting in a way that builds connection and respect.hear a story about a dad who finally achieved a life-long goal with his kids when he began to focus on these principles.receive 4-5 key questions to guide your thinking for inevitable discipline situations.
So whether you are a dad (or mom!) who’s raising toddlers, tweens, or teens these deep and heartfelt principles can help change the trajectory of your family for generations to come. We invite you to listen to the rest of this podcast series and be encouraged to lead your family with grace!
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
Want to learn more? Jim recorded this 38-minute audio thinking about dads (although moms can listen too!). If your wife has recently been digging into our material and is urging you to “get on board!” this is a great place to start!
Family Gatherings | Ep. 16
Dec 04, 2019
You’ve just had a family event and might still be recovering from the overt or passive-aggressive comments from extended family about your kids’ behavior and your parenting choices. Family gatherings can be HARD...especially if we sense that external pressure is shifting our parenting style to avoid criticism.
On this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson tackle this tough and timely issue. In today’s episode you’ll learn:
How to graciously talk to your parents (or other family members) about your parenting goalsHow to stay consistent and confident in your own parentingHow to prep your kids for success at family gatherings
Listen in and be encouraged. You’ll be ready for any extended family gatherings (birthday parties, Christmas, Easter, reunions, etc.) as you make a commitment to stay consistent and confident in your own parenting.
Want to dig deeper? Check out these helpful family gathering resources:
Read “3 Steps For Success in Holiday Chaos”.Read “What To Do When Relatives Criticize Your Parenting”.Read “Family Gatherings: Who’s In Charge” .If you have a child who struggles with sensory sensitivities, share “Viewing Your Child Through a Different Lens” with your family.Buy our Framework Magnet ($2!) to have handy as you explain your parenting goals.Encourage your parents, grandparents, or interested relatives to download and read, “4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.”
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox:
Discipline That Connects FAQ's
Sep 25, 2019
In this podcast, Jim Jackson interviews Stacy Bellward, online course moderator, in a fun and heartfelt conversation. (Find out what even got Jim a little teary!) You’ll get the real scoop on the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course, so you can know whether or not it’s a fit for you and your family.
In this 15-minute podcast we explore:
the history behind the Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course
how Stacy went from being a student (2014), to moderating (2015), to project managing and producing the updated version (2018)
what impact the DTC online course has had on families just like yours
what is included in the registration fee and what some of the key takeaways are from the course
One mom shared a realization as she began to walk in God’s grace for her parenting: “If I’m not defined by my past behavior then my kids aren’t either!” As God’s grace invades our messes, we learn that it’s who we are in Christ that defines us and empowers us to parent differently.
Don’t miss your opportunity to experience this life-changing course with hundreds of others from around the world!
To learn more:
Read through our Frequently Asked Questions about this online course.
Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. (Offered two times a year; fall and winter.
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview
Teaching Kids to Be Responsible for Their Actions | Ep. 14
Sep 18, 2019
Today, Stacy Bellward interviews Jim and Lynne Jackson as they dive deep into ways to correct kids’ misbehavior with the message, “You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions”.
Misbehavior is like the tip of the iceberg. If we make misbehavior our primary focus we miss guiding our children toward lasting change and growth. During this episode, all four parts of the Connected Families Framework are brought together.
“You are SAFE with me.” What’s going on with me? Can I exchange my inner angst for God’s grace and truth so my child feels safe?
“You are LOVED no matter what.” Express unconditional love, which often brings a child to repentance.
“You are CALLED & CAPABLE.” Coach my child toward wiser choices and better use of their gifts; solve the problem together.
You are RESPONSIBLE for your actions.” Hold a child accountable to make right what they’ve made wrong.
In this episode we talk through:
teaching your kids what it means to make right what they’ve made wrong.
the story of a young boy who hits his sibling and reconciles well.
how parents might respond when a teen misses the bus.
Want to learn more?
Download our eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs To Hear
Read this article about cultivating respect in your child.
Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. It is offered each year in the spring and fall.
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
Communicating Love in the Midst of Misbehavior | Ep. 12
Sep 04, 2019
Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson to talk about a message that is essential for discipline situations: You are LOVED no matter what!
Why is this necessary? Don’t kids already know they are loved?
During the frustration of misbehavior, kids can easily internalize a perception that their parents don’t like them. If we don’t intentionally communicate the message “You are LOVED no matter what” during challenges, kids will only become more discouraged. And if they believe they have to perform well to be loved, that can weave insecurity into the very fabric of their lives.
In this podcast we discuss in-depth what it looks like to practically bring “love-no-matter-what” into daily discipline challenges. We explore the questions:
What can we do to prevent performance-based insecurity?
Start with a heart to sincerely connect with your child, not to manipulate them. Then offer the same kind of connection that is natural in your relationship in non-conflict situations - like touch, humor, or verbal affection.
Doesn’t this let kids off the hook when they misbehave?
It actually helps keep them on the hook. Communicating love in the midst of misbehavior earns parents the respect needed to guide children to make right what they’ve made wrong. (See Romans 2:4)
What does “love-no-matter-what” look like in real life?
In today's podcast, Nichole, an adoptive mom with six kids, shares her story with strategies for connecting during misbehavior and the impact it’s had in her family.
Want to learn more?
Download the free Romans 8:38,39 adaption mentioned in the podcast. Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
What Does It Mean to Be an Emotionally Safe Parent? | Ep. 11
Aug 28, 2019
Being an emotionally safe parent is not about being soft or lenient. It’s also not suppressing our anxiety and frustration and trying to look calm when we discipline our kids. If we engage with a heart attitude of “What is wrong with you?!” our kids won’t feel safe with us.
The starting place for making your home a safe haven is to take an honest look at how you might be contributing to the conflict with your child. When you engage with a heart of grace and a sense of purpose for the discipline situation, it’s much easier to help your child feel emotionally safe.
In this podcast, Stacy Bellward interviews Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families about the foundational principle in the Discipline that Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course: What does it mean to be an emotionally safe parent? You’ll hear an amazing story written by a parent who transformed her relationship with her troubled child through the principle of emotional safety. This podcast and story hold lots of practical ideas you can apply today! If you don’t have time to listen, read our article Becoming An Emotionally Safe Parent.
Like what you hear? Be sure to subscribe to Connected Families podcasts so you don't miss a single episode!
To learn more about Connected Families framework for parenting download our eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.
My Child Will Not Get Ready for School On Time | Ep. 10
Aug 21, 2019
We’re in back-to-school season, bringing all the joy and anxiety that comes with it. One question we hear when we talk with parents is, “What do I do when my child won’t get ready for school on time?”
This week Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT and parent coach about how to respond in a kind, but firm, way to this high-stress time of day.
Short answer: The natural impact, without parental intervention, is what will be the greatest teacher.
Listen in as we explore a deeper dive into this frustrating issue:
Step 1 - IDENTIFY: Be clear in your expectations and ensure that your child has the ability to understand and clearly knows what to do to get out the door. Step 2 - EMPOWER: If kids are struggling, empower them to identify exactly what they may need from you to help them get going in the morning. Step 3 - TRANSFER: Try to avoid lecturing and nagging and implement your plan so you transfer the weight of responsibility to the child.
One resource we recommend is our free eBook Consequences That Actually Work where you will learn about natural, logical, and restitution consequences.
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook and Instagram for consistent encouragement in your parenting journey.
My Child Hits Me | Ep. 9
Aug 14, 2019
Your child is escalating quickly and you have a pretty good idea where this is headed. You know the scenario...the anger turns to screaming, which then becomes a full-blown tantrum. Pretty soon your child hits YOU.
In today’s episode Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Lynne Jackson, OTR as she helps to answer the question: “What should I do when my child is so out of control they hit me?!” She draws on her occupational therapy knowledge to help us understand how brain function impacts this tough dilemma.
The quick answer:
Work to figure out and verbalize what your child’s hands are trying to say. If their mouth could say it, their hands wouldn’t need to. If it continues, try to find the most loving way possible to keep everyone physically safe.
In this podcast we’ll explore this common scenario based on the Connected Families Framework:
FOUNDATION: You are safe with me. What’s going on in you? Are you responding back with anger because you are embarrassed or ashamed? (“What is wrong with this kid?!”) Instead, step away with calming thoughts like: “This is normal.” or “These emotions are too big for my child."CONNECT: You are loved no matter what. Heartfelt, sincere empathy is very powerful. State what your child is feeling and wanting.COACH: You are capable… of using your words to solve problems. Help your child with the messy process of gradually learning respectful self-advocacy as you teach emotional awareness outside of conflict times.CORRECT: You are responsible for your actions. Help your child choose a way to use their hands to restore the connection in the relationship.
As mentioned in this podcast, the Connected Families framework is also available on a magnet that is available for purchase. Keep it visible anywhere you typically look, for constant reminders and encouragement in your parenting!
To learn more about the topic of your child being too physical when they are angry, order our Discipline That Connects book and take a look at the appendix on aggression. Also, consider registering for our 8-session online course of Discipline That Connects With Your Child's Heart that we offer twice a year.
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts. Follow us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies/ and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams/"
Subscribe to never miss an episode!
My Tween Wants to Quit Music Lessons | Ep. 8
Aug 06, 2019
“I don’t WANT to practice my trumpet.” “My piano teacher is mean!” “I don’t have time to practice with all this homework. I want to quit!” Sound familiar?
In today’s podcast, Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT and parent coach to explore how our parenting framework gives insight into the question: ”What should I do when my tween wants to quit music lessons?”
Quick answer: In most cases, help your child understand that it’s important to stick to their commitments (for the duration of that commitment), and provide the support your child needs.
Listen to our full podcast to explore:
SAFE: Is the word “quit” a trigger for you, the parent, for some reason? LOVED/CONNECT: Can you understand and empathize with what it’s like to be your child? Maybe there’s a very logical reason why music lessons are not working. CAPABLE: How might you encourage capability in a way your child would receive: “I know this is hard, but you can do this hard thing!”? RESPONSIBLE: How do I help my child develop a sense of ownership for this?
In conclusion: Be in prayer and ask God for wisdom about this difficult decision. Encourage your kids even as you keep them responsible for their commitments. But if music lessons (or any other commitment!) isn’t benefiting your child don’t let it cost you the relationship. Find other ways for your child to learn responsibility.
To learn more about our parenting framework, download our FREE ebook Four Messages Every Child Longs To Hear.
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies/ and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams/
Subscribe to never miss an episode!
My Child Lies to Me | Ep. 7
Jul 31, 2019
Your child has just told you something you are pretty sure is not truthful. What should you do? Do you call them out on it? Should there a serious consequence?
In today’s podcast episode Stacy Bellward and Jim Jackson interview Chad Hayenga, LMFT, and parent coach. Together they tackle the challenging question: “What should I do when my child lies to me?”
The quick answer is:
Think of your big reactions like fertilizer. If you put big emotional intensity into calling out lying, you’re likely to get more of it. Take notice when your child tells the truth and give that a lot of positive attention.
In this episode we address:
How to give big intensity to truth-telling instead of lying.How to ask questions that set kids up to tell the truth, rather than questions that trap. Even when your child lies, how to stay emotionally safe as a parent so you don’t allow your child to control your emotions.
Consider this: If you stop giving big energy to lying and start giving big energy to truth-telling, over time, where might you be?
In this podcast we mention our Discipline That Connects online course. This course works to equip and encourage parents in many areas of parenting (including lying) using our parenting framework as the filter. This 8-session online course will be offered twice a year and is also available anytime as a small group. We'd love to see you there!
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies/ and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams/
My Child Says, “I Hate You!” | Ep. 6
Jul 24, 2019
Words are powerful. We can so easily take it personally when we hear hurtful words from our children like, “I HATE YOU!” But instead of reacting in frustration and anger, we encourage you to look below the surface. There may be deep reasons why the child might feel anxious, discouraged or ashamed in a way that is coming out in those aggressive words.
Jim Jackson and Stacy Bellward welcome Lynne Jackson, OTR and parent coach to the show. Lynne is an occupational therapist and brings practical brain-based knowledge and years of experience to this topic.
Today’s episode covers:
underlying causes including sensory, emotional, developmental factors that play a role in the words that children say.how you can respectfully and constructively help your children navigate big emotions that drive the hurtful words.the “language of emotions.” (Here’s the link for the feelings poster mentioned.)
When your child says, “I hate you!” they’re doing the best they can to tell you something else. Take a breath, then say, “I can see that you’re very, very angry!”
If this topic hits home for you, download our free Helping Kids with Anger e-book (https://connectedfamilies.org/anger-ebook/) to take steps towards peaceful parenting and connection, today.
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies/ and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams/Subscribe to never miss an episode!
My Kids Won't Do Chores Without Nagging
Jul 17, 2019
Have you ever wondered, "My child can’t manage to even take the garbage out. How will she ever survive in adulthood?" Or, maybe it sounds more like, "I do so much for these kids. Why can’t they do a few simple things to help out?!"
Today’s episode is loaded with tools and will give you a lot to think about as Jim Jackson and Stacy Bellward talk with Connected Families parent coach Chad Hayenga and pull apart the question, “What should I do when my kids won't do their chores without my nagging?"
In today’s episode you’ll learn:
Effective use of “when/then” statementsThe link between clear expectations and kind and firm accountabilityInsight into what compels parents to nag their kids How to help those distractible kidsHow to link privileges to responsibilities in an encouraging way
Ready to go deeper on this topic? Our 4-session online course, “The Entitlement Fix” (also available for small groups!) will give your family the tools you need to grow gratefulness and hard work. At only $23, we feel that this is a fantastic value. If that isn’t in your budget, check out our scholarship options.
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook and Instagram
My Kids Fight All the Time! | Ep. 4
Jul 10, 2019
It’s summer and the kids are home from school. Is the constant fighting and bickering more than you can take?
This week we welcome Lynne Jackson, parent coach and co-founder of Connected Families. She brings stories and practical solutions you can apply (today!) to the sibling conflict in your home. Your big take-away from this podcast:
Enter with big, sincere empathy for both kids (conflict is hard!) and then, as they begin to settle down, guide them toward their own solution.
To help make this practical we’ll introduce you to The Peace Process. This will give you a simple and memorable path down off “crazy mountain” toward true reconciliation:
calm (calm ourselves and help kids calm down)understand (empathize with your kids and help them understand each other)solve (use questions to help kids solve their problem)celebrate (highlight and recognize what went well)
We expand on these ideas in our 5-session online course Sibling Conflict: From Bickering to Bonding (also available for small groups!) In this course we equip you with lots of practical tools so your kids can learn to resolve their own conflicts well. Could you use a little peace in your home? Join us today!
I Feel Overwhelmed and Hopeless
Jul 03, 2019
Parenting is hard. It takes everything we have...and then some. What happens when we get to the point of feeling totally overwhelmed and hopeless? On this Connected Families Podcast episode, we discuss these overwhelmed feelings, pull them apart, and ask what we can do about them.
Our guest today is parenting coach and Connected Families co-founder, Lynne Jackson. Lynne clearly remembers the times she felt overwhelmed and hopeless as she raised her three rambunctious kids. She will bring practical ideas to encourage you today.
In this podcast we discuss:
how expectations can feed feelings of hopelessness.the idea behind toxic half-truths two key questions to help us identify and replace toxic lies with God’s truth
Check out the following resource:
Grace & Truth for Moms online course - We've designed this 5-session online course to be taken with a group. A group could be any size, including you and a friend!
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies) and Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams)
Subscribe to never miss an episode!
My Child Won’t Get Off Screens | Ep. 2
Jun 26, 2019
SCREEN TIME!!! It’s a persistent battle in almost every home. And it is one of the questions we receive most frequently. What should you do when your child constantly asks you for screen time? And more screen time? We expand on the following three ideas in this podcast:
Get yourself calm. Be clear about expectations, and what will happen if expectations aren’t met. Hold kids accountable to meet those expectations in a way that gains, not loses, kids’ respect.
Your calm respectfulness gives weight to your authority so you can hold your kids accountable.
Might sound simple, but what does this look like in everyday life? Listen in as we use role plays to pull apart a typical parent-child interaction about screens.
Our guest today is Connected Families parent coach Chad Hayenga. Chad is a licensed marriage and family therapist and has coached hundreds of parents - many with tween and teen children (and their challenges). Chad gives practical tips for this heated topic of screen time.
He will help you explore the questions:
What is your child hearing from you as you engage about screen time? What messages are they getting from you? Is there a better approach?
Help your child feel safe, loved, called and capable, and responsible for their actions. Check out the resources we mentioned on the podcast:
Discipline That Connects with Your Child's Heart book (also available in audio)Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview (FREE ebook!)
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies/ and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams/Subscribe to never miss an episode!
My Child Won’t Calm Down | Ep. 1
Jun 19, 2019
“My child won't calm down!”
Have you ever said these words? Perhaps even this morning? ;-)
On this Connected Families Podcast episode we discuss this relevant parenting concern and provide steps that you can take to move forward with grace and connection.
Our guest today is parenting expert, and Connected Families co-founder, Lynne Jackson, OTR. Lynne brings practical tips that you can use and a deeper understanding around the brain science of meltdowns. She’ll help you explore the questions:
What is going on with me?!?What is going on with my child?How should I respond when my child won't calm down?
You’ll learn what to say and do when your child won’t calm down, including how to effectively use empathy in the midst of a meltdown (I know! It’s hard!). You’ll also learn the keys to reducing the frequency of those meltdowns over the long haul, so your child can begin to learn to calm down independently when upset.
Help your child feel safe, loved, called and capable, and responsible for their actions. Check out the resources we mentioned on the podcast:
Discipline That Connects with Your Child's Heart book (also available in audio)Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview (FREE ebook!)
Want to learn more?
Subscribe to catch each episode on Apple Podcasts or wherever you find podcasts.Follow us on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/ConnectedFamilies/ and Instagram https://www.instagram.com/connectedfams/Subscribe to never miss an episode!
Connected Families Podcast
May 21, 2019
Welcome to the Connected Families Podcast! We are committed to bringing you content that will challenge, encourage, and equip you to be the thoughtful and confident parent you long to be. Beginning June 19th, the Connected Families podcast will be coming your way! Season 1 explores the question, "What should I do when.....?" .
Subscribe on iTunes or wherever you get your podcasts. Or share your name and email address below to ensure that each and every episode lands in your inbox.
Season 1 asks the question: “What should I do when….?”
Episode 1 – June 19, 2019 – My child won’t calm down.Episode 2 – June 26, 2019 – My child will not get off screens.Episode 3 – July 3, 2019 – I feel overwhelmed and hopeless.Episode 4 – July 10, 2019 – My kids fight all the time!Episode 5 – July 17, 2019 – My child says that they hate me.Episode 6 – July 24, 2019 – My kids won’t do their chores without my nagging.Episode 7 – July 31, 2019 – My child is hitting me.Episode 8 – August 7, 2019 – My tween wants to quit his instrument lesson.Episode 9 – August 14, 2019 – My child lies to me.Episode 10 – August 21, 2019 – My tween will not get ready for school on time.
“I can’t hear you!”
Aug 20, 2018
“I can’t hear you!! I can’t hear you!!”
You thought his misbehavior was frustrating, but when your child covers his ears and yells “I can’t hear you!” it sends your blood pressure through the roof!
We received this question from a parent, frustrated by this very situation:“How would you handle a child who puts his hands over his ears because he doesn’t want to hear when you are addressing his misbehavior or giving instructions?”
Sound familiar? Take a deep breath and 4 minutes to listen to what Jim and Lynne have to say about kids who refuse to listen by putting their hands over their ears.
What you’ll learn:
What his actions are communicating. I don’t feel safe right now. It’s too hard for me to listen. I’m ashamed of what I did.
How you can safely and lovingly talk to your child when he doesn’t want to hear you:
Start with empathy, instead of focusing on the correction. “Wow, it’s really hard isn’t it? You kinda had a rough time with your brother. Are you feeling sad about that?”
Engage his brain, by giving him some power in the situation. “Do you want to take some time to calm down before we talk?” “Do you want to talk first?” “Do you want me to sit down when we talk?”
If his hands still don’t move, talk to the hands. :-) “What are your hands telling me right now?”
When kids feel safe and loved, and we listen to what’s important to them, they are much more inclined to listen to us.
We love partnering with you and pray this recording was an encouragement in your parenting!
Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview.
Words that Hurt
Aug 02, 2018
In this Q & A, Jim and Lynne take 4 minutes to respond to a question from a mom and dad regarding their son’s hurtful words to his siblings.
“Our son constantly criticizes and teases our daughters - and anyone else that he sees as weaker than himself. It hurts them. While we want to lovingly correct our son, we also want to show our daughters that we are for them and want to protect them. We find it hard to do both. What should we do?”
By addressing both sides of the situation (the culprit and the casualties of the criticism) Jim and Lynne empower siblings to move from the resentment of ridicule to the joy of relationship.
LISTEN HERE
What you’ll learn in this audio:
Discover the root of your son’s negativity. Refrain from criticizing your son. Instead, talk through the feelings that are driving him to criticize others. Help him to understand the natural impacts of his hurtful words.
Find ways to build connection between the kids by getting them on the same team. Some ideas might include doing a service project, cooking a favorite meal, etc. Then acknowledge (with thoughtful, specific observations and affirmation) that you noticed how well they worked together.
Strengthen the child who has been picked on. Come alongside and encourage her to advocate for herself. Give her words to say and then roleplay the interaction. Teach her to discern the truth from trash, and how not to give untrue things power.
WHAT-EVER!! Ideas for Responding to Sass With Class
Jul 11, 2018
What-EVER! (with an eye roll)
You’ve seen it a hundred, maybe even a thousand times. Your child doesn’t like what you’ve said and responds with a head tilt, and eye roll, and the grand pronouncement, “What-EVER!!!!”
What do you do when this happens? The tendency is to shut it down, NOW! But your angry response communicates to your child that she is in control of your emotions. This gives her the “powerjolt” she needs to pull this behavior out again the next time she’s frustrated with you.
In this Q & A, Jim and Lynne take 7 minutes to respond to this question from a mom who is tired of her 8-year-old daughter’s sass. You’ll hear some quick pointers for how to respond with grace while keeping a child accountable for better behavior.
LISTEN HERE
As you respond, you’ll learn to communicate:
You’re SAFE with me: Stay calm as you take a deep breath. Your kids are not your report card.
You are LOVED even if you sass: Express empathy. “This is really hard, isn’t it? If it’s hard for me, I’m sure it’s hard for you.”
You are CAPABLE: Ask a question. “You don’t like how this is going. What would be a better way?”
We hope as you listen to this audio you are encouraged in your parenting! As you learn to follow these three steps to decrease the “sass-level” in your house, take joy in the small victories. We are here to help you in any way we can as you seek to grow your connected family.
The Four Strengths of Every Great Family
Jun 13, 2018
Jeremy Lee, from D6 Family Podcast, interviews the co-founders of Connected Families, Jim & Lynne Jackson. During this 20 minute podcast, Jim and Lynne share the Connected Families parenting framework, which focuses on building a strong parent-child relationship.
If you want to be encouraged and challenged in your parenting journey, listen in! We are SO EXCITED to partner with you as you lead your family with grace.
LISTEN HERE
In this interview Jim & Lynne share bonus parenting nuggets from their popular resources, Discipline that Connects With Your Child’s Heart, Sibling Conflict online course, and Challenging Children.
Highlights of what you’ll learn:
[0.00] Intro
[1:34] Foundation
Create a foundation that grounds your child’s identity and purpose in Christ.
[2:20] Connect
Communicate love to your child so that they can’t miss it. “I LOVE you and ENJOY you!”
[3:20] Coach
Don’t wait for misbehaviors to build your child’s character; instead, create opportunities to help them gain wisdom and purpose.
Follow Jesus’ example of asking thoughtful questions.
[5:49] Correct
Change your focus from punishment to gentle reconciliation.
Effective discipline puts the responsibility on the child to make right what they did wrong.
[8:15] Discipline that Connects
The goal of discipline is not to manage your child’s behavior, but to shape their belief about themselves. Their behavior ultimately flows out of their identity. “I’m a problem” vs “I’m the solution”.
[10:17] Sibling Conflict / Peace Process
Helping kids to value reconciliation and the joy of their sibling relationship.
Want to dig deeper into sibling relationships? Check out our Sibling Conflict Online Course
[15:28] Challenging Children
Giving parents compassion and coping mechanisms to help their sensitive child.
Instilling Identity and Character In Your Child
Sep 28, 2016
On Tuesday evening, September 20, Lynne spoke to a packed house at the Discipline That Connects book launch party about the most important messages that parents convey to their children in discipline. This four-level framework is the foundation of intentional, grace-filled parenting. Follow the link below to get a 10 minute audio clip of the message that Lynne shared with the crowd that evening. Listen to learn about building identity and why it is so biblical, and so crucial to character development in your child.
What you'll learn:
how Jesus lived his own life out of his identity
how Jesus built identity in his disciples
how we can build the same identity in our kids
>
Powerful Strategies to Fill Your Parenting with Peace and Confidence
Feb 26, 2016
Jim and Lynne sat down with the Positive Parenting podcast to share powerful strategies for disciplining in a way that actually connects with kids - filling your parenting with peace and confidence.
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