Ballot with Patrick Gutfield - Where Politics Meets Pop Culture

Latest Episodes:

Cracker Barrel Rebrands, Trump Hates Fresh Sheets, and Ducks Defeat Detention Aug 25, 2025

Show notes

Cracker Barrel ditches grandma’s kitchen vibes for a sleek new logo, and the internet unleashes its full fury. Trump reportedly freaked out over clean sheets, locked his own bedroom door against the Secret Service, and possibly hides the Epstein Files under his mattress. MSNBC accuses him of ankle concealment, and the White House hilariously plays along. Meanwhile, a federal judge shuts down Florida’s “Alligator Alcatraz” detention center… because you can’t build a prison in a swamp and pretend it’s not federal.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
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Trump Rides with the Troops, Kamala Hits the Road, and Solar Power Gets Fired Aug 22, 2025

Show notes

Trump patrols the streets of D.C. with the military and celebrates “law and order” with a Shake Shack run. Meanwhile, the Vice President launches a crackdown on sunlight, banning “Solar” in all-caps, and Kamala Harris embarks on a 15-city book tour that somehow includes London. Also: the State Department decides to re-vet 55 million visa holders just in case, and no, you still haven’t heard about the Epstein Files.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Black Walls, Gold Offices, and Fake Windows: America, You’re Doing Great Aug 21, 2025

Show notes

Trump wants to paint the border wall black because it gets hot—just like science says—and Jack White has thoughts about the new Oval Office, which now resembles a pro wrestler’s dressing room designed by Liberace. Meanwhile, Delta and United are being sued for selling “window seats” that don’t come with actual windows. It’s a big week for style over substance, beige walls over actual views, and gold over good taste.
From Washington, where even the planes are lying to you, this is Ballot.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Trump Fights Museums, and Oklahoma Flunks the Constitution Aug 20, 2025

Show notes

Donald Trump is furious that museums dare to talk about slavery, calling the Smithsonian “OUT OF CONTROL” and demanding more exhibits about “Success” and “Brightness.” Meanwhile, Oklahoma unveils a fifty-question anti-woke purity test for teachers that was cooked up by PragerU—because nothing says academic rigor like a quiz your uncle found on Facebook.
Also: why Trump’s idea of “helping” Ukraine is basically cheerleading from 30,000 feet, and how one multiple-choice test thinks “In God We Trust” is in the Constitution. It’s a real day in America, folks.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Trump Hosts Zelensky and the European All-Stars: Peace Talks, Nobel Calls, and MS NOW Aug 19, 2025

Show notes

President Trump welcomes Ukrainian President Zelensky and top European leaders to the White House in a flashy attempt at diplomacy—no yelling this time! Trump pitches a Putin-Zelensky-Trump summit while Europe floats “Article Five-like” promises no one can define. Plus: Trump’s awkward Nobel Prize cold-call to Norway, and MSNBC’s wild corporate rebrand to “MS NOW.” Is peace on the table or just another TV special? And did someone say… Epstein files? All that and more, on Ballot.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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JD Vance’s Fishing Fiasco, Pub Mutiny & Trump wants Pocahontas drug tested Aug 18, 2025

Show notes

British Foreign Secretary David Lammy and U.S. Vice President JD Vance got busted for fishing without licenses, sparking fines and a very “chummy” press conference. Vance’s trip got worse: he was rejected by a Michelin-rated pub, faced a protest called “Dance Against Vance,” and ended up retreating to Trump’s Turnberry golf course. Meanwhile, Trump celebrated Social Security’s 90th anniversary by calling Elizabeth Warren a “nutjob” who needs a drug test, while bragging about kicking 275,000 “illegal aliens” off Social Security.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Trump Meets Putin in Alaska While Taylor Swift Breaks the Internet Aug 15, 2025

Show notes

Donald Trump is heading to Alaska for his first sit-down with Vladimir Putin since 2018, pitching himself as a diplomatic wedding planner while promising peace talks with Zelensky. Meanwhile, Trump mobilizes the National Guard for “community beautification” patrols in D.C.—because nothing says law and order like soldiers with leaf blowers. And in the culture wars, Taylor Swift’s appearance on Travis Kelce’s podcast breaks YouTube, leaving Trump fuming about podcast ratings.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Trump’s $200 Million Party Palace, RFK Jr. Shreds Vaccine Research, and Hollywood Declares War Aug 14, 2025

Show notes

Trump wants a ballroom that would make Gatsby jealous, RFK Jr. torches half a billion in pandemic preparedness, and 2,300 Hollywood writers—from Spike Lee to John Waters—sign an open letter taking direct aim at the President.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Sydney Sweeney vs. The Epstein Cover-Up, Maxwell’s Mystery Prison Move, and Obama Gets Portrait-Shamed Aug 13, 2025

Show notes

The White House tries to bury Epstein questions with denim ads starring Sydney Sweeney. Ghislaine Maxwell scores a cushy prison transfer, and Trump banishes Obama’s portrait to the political attic.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
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Trump Sends National Guard to DC, Newsom Trolls With Taco Meme, and the Epstein Files Stay Buried Aug 12, 2025

Show notes

When the President takes over a city’s police force, feuds with California’s governor over tacos, and still won’t release the Epstein files, you know it’s going to be a weird week. Plus, Harvard scientists officially ruin french fries.
Come for the sass, stay for the sanity—and blame the A.I. for the jokes that don’t land.
Unlock an ad-free podcast experience with Caloroga Shark Media! Get our shows on any player you love, hassle free! For Apple users, hit the banner on your Apple podcasts app. For Spotify or other players, visit caloroga.com/plus. No plug-ins needed!
Subscribe now for exclusive shows like 'Palace Intrigue,' and get bonus content from Deep Crown (our exclusive Palace Insider!) Or get 'Daily Comedy News,' and '5 Good News Stories’ with no commercials! Plans start at $4.99 per month, or save 20% with a yearly plan at $49.99. Join today and help support the show!
Get more info from Caloroga Shark Media