Bad Melee Podcast

Special: A Roast by Any Other Name ft. Ludwig! Sep 28, 2018

We're back with a lil' ol special episode of the Bad Melee Podcast recapping the Roast of Hugo Gonzalez. Each person on the cast had a very different role in the event, with everyone pressing the heads of their penises together to make a giant roast Megazord. We go through the writing process, wax philosophical on the concept of accreditation, talk about a few hiccups with the tournament, and if we really are in the era of too much Ludwig.

Special: Dressed to the Nines Jul 11, 2018

Welcome to the second annual post-Bigger Balcony podcast. A bit of a departure from last year as nobody almost got into a fistfight at the venue and Ludwig was not present to show his nutsack during mafia, this year's Project M tournament still left us with plenty to discuss. With several actors as Balcy the Bro Sun, PM being streamed on Twitch with seemingly no repercussions, a hentai connoisseur taking the title yet again, and our dear friend Guntherz getting cheated out of win, the illegal tournament once again forged memories of friendship and strife that we will carry to our graves.

Special Episode: Gamer Sting Operation ft. Apologyman! Jun 14, 2018

Special circumstances have led a very sorry individual to our podcast, where he takes us through his life's journey leading him to place 5th at Summit of Power, as well as describes in great detail the story of how he was DQ'd from EVO Top 8. We finally pinpoint which Seinfeld characters each member of the podcast is, with some startling revelations about who is and isn't Newman, and talk about the mechanics and implications of the new SmUsh game. After attending E3, only one questions remains: Are we truly gamers that have lost our way, or is it kids who are wrong?

Special Summit 6 Episode! May 13, 2018

Special Summit 6 Episode! by Bad Melee Podcast

S3E11: A Fine Pilsner Male May 13, 2018

It's the final podcast of season 3, and with an uncertain future the boys spend their last hours talking about poop fetishes, the Socal arcadian, and break down the structure of memes. Later on in the night, Dawson and Anthony talk about potential future timelines as well as distinguish the line between bullying and clowning, which Dawson has been doing the former of to Anthony this whole time. Yet again, it's been a wild ride, and this time it's thanks to people who contributed their hard-earned dollars. To anyone who subscribed to the patreon, watched, listened, shitposted, tweeted, anything and everything: thank you, from the bottom of our hearts.

S3 E10: This Feeling is Temporary May 08, 2018

The boys return with an inside look at Smash Summit 6 in which Dawson successfully convinced Slime that he had never used a microwave for his entire life. Also covered is the fiery twitch reception from the Bad Melee Podcast being broadcast in the late timeslot at Smash Summit, Puzzle Bobble, UCF, and the nature of self-reflection.

S3 E9: Fatso, Stinkie, and Stretch May 01, 2018

Our very dear and ghostly friend Indie makes a special guest appearance on this, the day of Slime's birthday. After a thorough roasting session, the boys once again delve into the sedate waters of esports content and attempt to get at the heart of what makes people FEEL. Other topics include the new Socal house of smashers, SSS, and Ludwig.

S3E8: Whatever it Takes Apr 24, 2018

In one of the more rigorous AMAs of Miles's life, the boys ask him a barrage of questions about animals in Australia and what joey meat tastes like. We cover topics including sending severed pinkies in the mail, Ninja going to the grocery store, Flatiron 3, content creators, and chasen dreamz.

S3E7: Spend Ten Rosebud on New Chain Apr 18, 2018

It seems that when the going gets tough, we can all come together and agree how fucked up it felt to slap the animals in Black and White. Among other topics, the boys go over the yips, removing the ladder while our Sims are swimming, playing lame, Ludwig Anders Gaming, Miles at shine, and mean people on the internet.

S3 E6: Genevieve, If You're Listening Apr 10, 2018

In the spirit of Hugs, we started this podcast late but ended up finishing strong. We talk about the apparent uselessness of the council, the current trajectory of reality TV and esports, the plight of the Unga Bunga Man, and grade school crushes.

S3 E5: Big Apple, 3 P.M. Apr 03, 2018

This podcast eventually features newly sponsored Buzzfeed Melee professional, Hugs, here for his second tour on the show. After taking his licks for showing up late, we cover topics such as Tom Hardy's traps, comedic analysis, social climbing, racism, and LIFE AFTER MELEE.

S3E4: Slime's Comedy Pipeline Mar 28, 2018

This episode of the podcast has the Miles and Anthony recounting their trip to Indiana for Full Bloom. Amidst Miles getting food poisoning from pad thai and Anthony having net 7 hours of sleep during the whole trip, turns out it was alright. We delve into the current state of commentary as we see it, Zamu from Champagne, and how most people are actually alright.

S3 E3: The Mangus Mar 20, 2018

The boys come back fresh from the one-day tournament "The Mangus" and break down what went well and what didn't at the event. We also explore the distinctions between "not-serious" tournaments against traditional ones, as well as if Mega X-mas's wins on Mike Haze and Hugs really do count (they do).

S3 E2: Homie Card Booster Pack Mar 13, 2018

On this episode of the podcast, the boys have a new table and are ready to talk about the fiasco of the National Arcadian and the subsequent VroPost™ in the Socal Melee page. Other topics covered include EGLX, Smash 5 tinfoil hat conspiracies, people named Amsa who do not play red Yoshi, and Miles’ new outlook on the game we all love.

S3 E1: The Waste Man's Bride Mar 05, 2018

Our beloved Australian friend returns for season 3 of the podcast thanks to viewers like YOU. In the first episode of the new dawn, we cover the recent Socal vote scandal, the National Arcadian, fire-ing in the hole, and the magic of just having a really sick float, bro. It's good to be back.

Slime on the Side #4 - The Free One Feb 13, 2018

This FREE EDITION of the patreon sidecast features a guest appearance from a nice boy named Eddie that we found wandering around at the local In n' Out (not really, but how funny would that be). Topics included feature the magic of ventriloquism, owning actual castles in 2018, Dr. Disrespect's money-making play, Mike being propositioned for sex during a Lyft, and flavored chemotherapy. If you enjoyed it, consider subbing to the paych to help house Miles for the next three months in SoCal!

Christmas Special #2 - Dry Cold American Autumn Dec 11, 2017

During their stay at Smashcamp 2017, The Cheat and Ludwig join a special campout podcast in the heart of Friendly Pines in Prescott, Arizona. The boys discuss several topics including mirrors, Pepis, Amanda Peet, DaVinci Camp, and field a few twitter questions after we swap to local recording.

Christmas Special - RIP Kage's Marriage Dec 06, 2017

In a special interim episode of the podcast, I take my happy ass down to San Diego to hang out with the discontinuity leader himself Chroma, and perhaps the only Indian Marth prodigy/stand up comedian in the world, Diya. We discuss Pat's House, Diya's contempt for kids, pooping strategies, shoe money matches, Hungrybox's decimating/heartwarming phone call to an ambitious local player, and DJDriftking97's horrid web of lies.

S2 E15: The King of the Lobby Nov 12, 2017

The boys give a very heartfelt send-off to one another in the final episode of the Miles Arc of the Bad Melee Podcast. Topics of discussion include reminiscing on the past nine months or so in SoCal, what it means to go for what you really want, the glory days of WoW raiding, and Dawson finally bears all about his Wiccan babysitter that shaped him into the man he is. Miles moved to SoCal without knowing where he was going to sleep, eat, or skeet, all in the pursuit of becoming the best at the game. He's going back to Australia now with a journey under his belt that many will go through their lives without ever experiencing, and we're glad that we could be a part of it and continue to be a part of it. Thanks Melee.

S2 E14: Summits Like White Elephants Nov 09, 2017

In a stunning return to form, we're back to our Bebas Nue typeface overlay with Neep at the stream helm. This week we recap Smash Summit and Slime goes inside baseball with his experience. Other topics are Hbox yelling at the internet, the Tipped Off guy selling his house, the Mortal Kombat movie, and what the future holds for the boys.

S2 E13: Hard Seven-Point-Five Nov 02, 2017

This very spooky podcast features the fulfillment of our patreon goal to bring everyone's favorite socially anxious cat lover, Neeper. This episode covers tales from the traphouse (which just recently got the water turned back on) standing desks, where the money is in Melee compared to other esports, and Chong's first interaction with Youtube comments.

S2 E12: Death to Cooljamz Oct 26, 2017

This week Miles, Guntherz, and Slime recount their horrible trip to Dreamhack Denver. Tales include missing flights, drinking bombayterade, boosting sandwiches, money matching Colorado boys, Skeeball, and more shirtless Mario Party. Don't take your Tool CDs for granted.

S2 E11: Three Yerbs and I'm on One Oct 18, 2017

This week features the old rig coming in CLUTCH as Jett got in an unfortunate car accident and couldn't come stream (he is ok). In this special standard definition episode, Slime and Ludwig sort out their feelings on the former's new success. The Big House and the boys' experience in Detroit is recapped, as well as Summit voting, Michael Jackson, bonsai trees, and rating each other's looks.

S2 E10: Pulp, From Socal Oct 05, 2017

On this podcast, the boys cross streams with the most hated PM commentator to ever grace his illegal game. Guntherz fills us in on some SoCal PM lore as well as tales from his travels to gatherings of Melee's disfigured, but equally degenerate cousin. Other topics include GTX, roasting libertarians, and not talking about Big House despite it being on the overlay.

S2 E9: Fist of the Brown Star Sep 20, 2017

Unfortunately, our scheduled guest Chroma met with a conspicuous end, so we brought our old pal Hypertoast on to help us recount Smash the Record 2017. This week's topics include some waste man tales, pretentiously comparing top 10 videos to great artistic struggles, Chillin's Mario, how we perceive integrity, and David Chong's testicles.

S2 E8: The Saga of Pepis Vs. FD (Bass Boosted) Sep 06, 2017

In a very political move, we bring on representative and captain of the Final Destination crew Vince, aka "Stanky." We cover Red Bull Smash Gods and Gatekeepers, the upcoming libel lawsuit against the SoCal Melee Facebook Page, and the now-defunct card shop where the FD crew was spawned. Stanky regales us with lore involving Slob on my Knob, jerking on haters, FD after hours, and we collectively re-live the hypest crew battle in SoCal Melee history.

S2 E7: I Miss the Old Ludwig Aug 22, 2017

The boys have their dear friend and WORLDWIDE YOUTUBE SENSATION Ludwig on to talk about how he was never cool as a teen. Miles regales the cast with his Smashcon experience and everyone takes turns swinging at the softball roast that was The Smashies. Other topics include Dawson's sadness, VOD paywalls, and how lame mid-level SoCal really is.

S2 E6: Leffen's Powdered Nose Aug 10, 2017

This very special episode marks return of the Colorado's best green Marth, Indie. Hot off a two-day press tour of LCS, Zeke breaks down a few differences between the largest esport and ours. Other topics of discussion include breaking Chong's heart, the new RULE COUNCIL, and we break down each of our relationships with the sauce.

S2 E5: License to Shill Jul 25, 2017

We sit down to recap EVO 2017, including the boys coming up on a couple checks, Bizzarro getting taken down, and Slime's wild pool adventure. Other topics of discussion include the ethical complications of shilling, the old days of the internet/limewire, speedrunning, and what furries' fathers think of them.

S2 E4: Donahoo's Mans is this Jul 02, 2017

Special shoutouts to Max Miller (https://twitter.com/maximumsabre) who likes our bullshit enough to have made an intro video. This week we bring on Socal's very own Mixx, a.k.a. Diya, to tell us what it's like to sit pretty on the illustrious power ranking. Topics of discussion include ringworm, urinals, Shiz Wiz, chill bits versus fire bits, and Dawson puts a few TOs on blast to distract himself, momentarily, from his inner sadness.

S2 E3: What if Armada Was Really Into Hentai? Jun 11, 2017

CHRIST THIS WAS A LONG ONE We nabbed Kira for one more episode before he leaves us forever, and we bring on local SoCal ranked player/expert Roy main Psychomidget to tell us Irvine lore, why puff is bad, and how he used to play League of Legends Pictionary with Dave. Other topics include vomiting in the street, tarantulas, PM players, and literally a million other things.

S2 E2: You Already Blow Ft. Kira May 17, 2017

We pulled all the strings we had to get a true Melee legend on the show. Kira takes us through the past decade of his Melee life, from a lad that saw the game in its infant days all the way to developing tendinitis like a true fox main. Other topics include Denny's spaghetti, farm animals, young Mango, how Irvine doesn't talk about girls, the socal PR and arcadian, SSBM Tutorials, and nutting. We're gonna miss you, buddy.

S2 E1: 1-800-WHOBOOLIN May 03, 2017

A new era begins as the boys team up with local Socal streamers/degenerates The Meta Shift to bring you shitposting in glorious HD. This week features DonB of Legacy Gaming, who lived in the fabled Neephouse for a few months while grinding melee in Socal. Stories include bag spaghetti, Donahoo's, the recent Arcadian, and for the first time we interact with goons in chat for a truly a interactive experience. Follow The Meta Shift on twitch and you too can see a bunch of nobodies, live!

Episode 34: Reverse Fair, Dair Ft. Cakes Feb 03, 2017

This week features socal Peach legend Cakes, who regales us with how she came to play Melee, her connections to Putin, and her difficulty with the chaingrab. Other topics of discussion include the Colorado Smash page being frozen in carbonite, serial Twitter DMers, and what Pepis REALLY is.

Episode 33: Hennesis 4 Jan 27, 2017

The boys are back in their respective towns and regale you with their G4 experiences. Topics of discussion include the bootleg Smashbox, Neeper suffering the wrath of the Smash 4 Twitter community, and Melee losing the EVO time slot.

Episode 32: I Slay Weebs Jan 19, 2017

Griffin was busy doing real life things, but in this pre-Genesis episode we discuss our pools, our predictions, and Anthony recounts a harrowing tale from rural America. Other topics are the nature of tags, who the viewers would like to tackle on a football field, and Neeper finding out that his cat is gay.

Episode 31: If You Can Dodge a Bair, You Can Dodge a Ball Jan 05, 2017

This week's episode speculates on Hungrybox's finger assailant as well as the who the Happy Gilmore of Melee would be. We also question what had ever happened to Mango's sub cruise and swap Rudolph stories.

Episode 30: The Return of Griffin Dec 23, 2016

The final podcast of 2016 marks the return of Bad Melee's founder. Topics include what Griffin has been up to, the shenanigans of Don't Park on the Grass, our expectations for 2017, and Jacob Brayll Wolf.

Episode 29: The Aaron Carter Dilemma Dec 15, 2016

On this week's podcast we try our hardest to see into young Syrox's future, as well as celebrate Indie making it on his first PR. Other topics include the importance of chairs in a Melee scene, Salami Mommy, and not approaching.

Episode 28: The Wrath of Dark Fendrick Dec 07, 2016

This week we talk about the brilliantly titled UGC, how to deal with your miserable work schedule, and Zeke yells at the Smashbox. Other topics are some MIOM predictions, Neeper's expulsion from the Bad Melee Team House, and ponder how to farm Genesis for #content.

Episode 27: Tales from the 805 Dec 01, 2016

This week's special guests are local degenerates Krusty Kurt and Hulka, who pass down ancient lore from one of SoCal's loudest regions. Stories include a drunken crew battle versus UCLA, Westballz throwing a burrito, and the greatest tournament of all time that never happened. We also touch on a recent arcadian and I console a fellow player who has lost to Ringler.

Episode 26: Scrump the Record Nov 17, 2016

This week Zeke regales us with his secret Smash the Record adventure in the funhouse mirror of reality that is Florida. Other topics discussed are RPS ettiquite, teenage email addresses, and we share our #hot #takes on the recent MagicScrumpy caper. We also bring on "SFAT" for a quick guest spot and in a rare move actually discuss how to improve at Melee.

Episode 25: Weedmaps® Light 'em Up Combo of the Day™ Nov 11, 2016

On these week's podcast we spend time talking about the strange nature of the summit, sponsorship oppurtunities, and imagine Blur as a confident sea captian. Zeke's corner has us exploring the topic of doubles, and we also read emails before Neeper dazzles us with his musical abilities.

Episode 24: xODINFORCEx Nov 03, 2016

This week on the podcast we tell some roommate stories, talk at length about tags and their implications, and spread the good word of the Church of Neutral. Neeper's stint in Club Penguin is revealed and we also wish Griffin a happy birthday.

Episode 23: Long Live the Wiener Boys Oct 28, 2016

On this week's episode, special guest Chroma lends his insight into the unpredictable mind of Santiago, the place of memery in smash scenes, and Ken's food truck. Other topics of discussion are Summit, the flawed idea of "aspiring" to be a commentator, and a rundown of Melee crews.

Episode 22: Tendies Man and the Chamber of the Loud Oct 17, 2016

In this post-Big House recap, we introduce a few new members of the podcast. Topics include tales from Pool C111, how batshit crazy Colorado locals are, and Neeper's social anxiety. Email the podcast! We will likely read your email aloud: badmelee.com@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/slime_machine https://twitter.com/kneeperssbm https://twitter.com/indiessbm

Episode 21: Harder, Better, Faster, Twitlonger Aug 18, 2016

Bit of a quick and dirty episode this week. Topics of discussion are C.C.'s laundry, Mike Haze quitting Melee, Duna Cat, and some hot fire listener emails.

Episode 20: 8 Frames of Lag Aug 12, 2016

This week we have renowned FGC alcoholic Kazmer on to tell us how bad our favorite game is. We also discuss Melty Blood kids, the five worst things to happen to Melee, Low-tier God, and Adam Sandler movies.

Episode 19: SF5 Smash 4 - Serge (Lucario) Vs. Darkfall (Link) SSB4 Tournament - Smash Wii U HD Aug 04, 2016

This week we put ourselves in very real danger by interviewing the alleged mastermind behind the VGBC Serge/Darkfall naming scandal. Other points of discussion are roasting VGBC business practices, C.C.'s first Twitter beef, how to talk to normies about Melee, and getting beaten by Ganon mains in tournament. Email the podcast! We will likely read your email aloud: badmelee.com@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/slime_machine https://twitter.com/itsamecc https://twitter.com/Snowden We're also on soundcloud and itunes for listening to our garbage on the go: https://soundcloud.com/bad-melee-podcast/

Episode 18: Shitposter's Guide to the Galaxy Jul 28, 2016

This week we have Socal shitposting legend V$ come on to discuss a range of topics including Hyprid's dashdancing, The Great Nut, and how to play blackjack like a Marth main. Other points of discussion are the Cute Smasher Tier List, C.C.'s love for Wizzy, and Chipotle.

Episode 17: Luchador Pikachu For President Jul 21, 2016

Freshly back from EVO, the boys discuss their pools experience, Melee Top 8, and most importantly which Street Fighter character they'd most like to have eat their ass. We also get deep into a discussion about the maintenance of eyebrows and roast Damian for his social anxiety.

Episode 16: He Need Some Milk Jul 14, 2016

After a long hiatus, we return with a new friend. Topics of discussion include dropping acid at Evo, the smash version of Bully Beatdown, a reading and discussion of fine literature, and bitching about esports. It's good to be back.

Episode 15: You Should Grab More Apr 07, 2016

We're back! This week we weigh in on the now-forgotten MacD allegations and talk about Pound. Griffin also reveals how he's actually the worst person to ever go to the movies with and we try to guess which smashers drink which types of alcohol.

Episode 14: RIP in Pizza Apollo Creed Mar 25, 2016

We discuss the Battle of the Five Gods and Griffin reveals his deep appreciation for Prog. Other topics of discourse include the worst company to be sponsored by, strip clubs, how Reddit is awful, and Anthony's beef with the entire Washington Melee community.

Episode 13: Ness Carries You Tbh ft. Jim Jam Flim Flam Mar 17, 2016

On a very special episode of the podcast we bring on undisputed smash legend Jim Jam Flim Flam to read his soon-to-be-seminal Melee fanfic. A myriad of topics are also touched on including The Magic School Bus, JJFF's projected performance at the Battle of the Five Gods, the salty Marth main from Genesis, and a totally lit party at last year's EVO.

Episode 12: Lost in the SAUS Mar 10, 2016

The boys attempt to deconstruct the diseased minds of low-tier mains and Anthony talks about an encounter with a memer that makes him reconsider his worldview. Other topics are asian fetishes, how to give Yoshi the dick, and constructing the worst smasher possible.

Episode 11: Can I Have a Hug? Mar 03, 2016

We have a guest this week who is a verified grill to tell some stories about creepy smashers at tournaments. We also recount a couple of poop stories and Griffin reveals that he's been spending time with a bunch of eight year olds.

Episode 10: Excusing BEASTiality Feb 25, 2016

The boys have a lengthy debate about the Westballz incident at BEAST 6, memes, and whether or not nihilism excuses rudeness, followed by a moratorium placed on all Westballz discussion. We also bring on Anthony's long-time friend Scott and talk about how much of a salty asshole Anthony is/used to be.

Episode 9: USDA Prime Grade Beef Feb 17, 2016

This week we bring up the lame-ass Westballs/Leffen drama and talk about beef in general. We also talk about how we got into Melee, how much Anthony lives and dies for memes, and how hard Super Mario Land was on the Gameboy. Email the podcast! We will likely read your email aloud: badmelee.com@gmail.com Follow us on Twitter: https://twitter.com/SSBM_Verbal https://twitter.com/slime_machine https://twitter.com/DamianDufel The meme I promised to link: http://i.imgur.com/Il3pHUp.png

Episode 8: Wait, Metroid is a GIRL? Ft. Hugs Feb 05, 2016

No Damian this week, but we finally got the boy Hugs on to tell us a few stories including how he almost lost his identity, how he's been grimed in the past, and how Armada is an actual anime character.

Episode 7: Gregg's Organic Kitchen Jan 30, 2016

Literally every guest booked had bailed on us, so this week we talk about M2K's living arrangements, what our mains in Pokken are going to be, and try to deconstruct Smash commentary. We also crack open the mailbag for the first time and Griffin sees a shadow of a dick.

Episode 6: Stop Fucking Clapping to the Dreamland Theme Jan 24, 2016

This week Anthony is back from Genesis to tell a few stories, as well as collectively bitch about mango fanboys. We also talk about large tournaments in general, how Armada is a ham sandwich, and the issue of asking top players for pictures.

Episode 5: Genitals 3 Jan 14, 2016

This week we talk about our Genesis predictions outside of the game itself, what you would do if Mike Haze went Game and Watch against you on stream, self-actualization, and which smashers have the sickest vape mods.

Episode 4: The Legend of Turbo Sexphonic and Zonky Booker Dec 31, 2015

After a holiday break, we're back to discuss alternate smasher names and the art of shitposting, as well as accidentally talk shit on Eikelmann. We also discuss our personal smash alter-egos and Griffin laughs at a face-merge.

Episode 3: Our Guest Still Hasn't Shown Up Dec 21, 2015

This week we characterize the top eight on the tier list with what shitty song they would be, discuss tinder strategies, and lament the birth of Esports.

Episode 2: Literally Nobody Likes Bowser Dec 21, 2015

This week we discuss our favorite characters from when we were 10, why Griffin hates Canada, and more.

Episode 1: Choose Your Character Dec 21, 2015

The first edition of what will likely be a long-lasting and successful podcast series centered around Super Smash Bros Melee, its competitive scene, and whatever else pops into our feeble minds.

Our TOPPODCAST Picks

Follow Us

Stay Connected

Related Podcasts

Links

Stay Connected