After Hours With Amanda

Latest Episodes:

Can We Celebrate Going Back to Therapy? | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 10 Jul 05, 2022

Show notes

Hey friend. In this episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m taking a deep breath with you and talking through a tender week. I share why I took time off social media, how grief and addiction memories around my brother Adam came back up, and why I’m reminding myself that mental health is not a finish line. We also get into therapy, body image, old family patterns, Dopesick, motherhood, and the ache of wanting every human to feel seen, loved, and needed. This is not expert advice. It is just a very honest, very human check-in from someone still becoming.

00:00 Hey Friend, Let’s Take a Breath

02:37 Remembering to Actually Breathe

04:59 Why I Took a Week Off

07:02 Why This Podcast Feels Safe

07:53 Body Image, My Mom, and Old Patterns

12:39 When Our Wounds Start Bleeding

14:31 Working Out, Therapy, and Mental Health

16:02 Adam, Addiction, and Being Triggered

23:30 Watching Dopesick Hit Too Close

27:31 Mental Health Is Not a Finish Line

31:15 Be Careful What You Consume

32:36 Can We Celebrate Going Back to Therapy?

34:34 Sharing Adam’s Story

38:51 The Gift of Unconditional Love

40:34 This Is a Safe Place

42:31 We’re All Different, and That’s Okay

45:25 You Are Loved, Valued, and Needed

You Asked- I Answered: My Trauma Dictated Dating Life | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 9 Mar 10, 2022

Show notes

TW: In this episode, I broadly touch on sensitive subjects so I wanted to give you a heads up. So many of you have requested a dating episode speaking specifically to my dating life and experience and as always I wanted to be honest with you.

Substance Abuse Hotline- 1-800-662-4357

National Suicide Prevention Hotline- 1-800-273-8255

National Sexual Abuse Hotline- 1-800-656-4673

National Domestic Violence Hotline- 1-800-799-7233

In this episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m sharing the dating story y’all have been asking for, but not as advice. This is a vulnerable look at toxic relationship patterns, gaslighting, boundaries, and what happens when chaos becomes your baseline for love. I talk about wanting to feel seen, ignoring red flags, mistaking attention for care, and slowly learning that peace is not boring and love should not make you feel less than. If you have ever played the highlight reel to convince yourself something “wasn’t that bad,” this one is for you.

00:00 Coke, Gas Tanks, and Chaos

06:16 Why I’m Sharing My Dating Story

08:49 Wanting to Feel Seen

12:21 Gaslighting, Lies, and the Promise Ring

14:28 When Chaos Becomes Your Baseline

21:29 The Tarzan Swing Into Another Relationship

28:23 When One Green Flag Felt Like Everything

35:02 Addiction, Boundaries, and Feeling Responsible

38:10 The Hole No Relationship Could Fill

40:12 Disneyland, Blake, and Faith That Felt Safe

42:41 Why I Used to Create Conflict

48:10 You Deserve More Than Just Good Enough

The Toxicity of Achievement Culture | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 8 Mar 04, 2022

Show notes

This week, I’m talking about achievement culture, parenting pressure, and the way we can accidentally make our tiny humans’ milestones, grades, emotions, and behavior about us. From swim week and school decisions to pacifiers, homework, gentle parenting, hugs before correction, and the phrase “fair means you get your needs met,” this episode is about separating our kids’ growth from our own self worth. I’m sharing what I’m learning in real time as a mom who is doing her best, trying to disrupt before I erupt, and remembering that our children are whole people, not reflections of our performance.

00:00 Thursday Night Podcast Vibes

00:29 Welcome to the Coffee Chat

01:40 Swim Week and Tired Kids

04:36 Getting Ready for My Mental Health

06:20 Achievement Culture

07:15 Choosing a Different School Path

09:45 The Pacifier Question

12:18 What Do I Actually Care About?

13:37 Achievement Starts in Pregnancy

16:32 Milestones Are Not a Report Card

18:33 Gentle Parenting and Identity

23:34 Homework After a Full Day

26:25 Why I Started This Podcast

29:26 You Might Just Not Fit That Job

31:33 Your Achievements Are Not Your Identity

37:00 Tiny Triggers and Looking Inward

38:47 Disrupt Before You Erupt

42:03 Why I Offer a Hug First

45:04 Fair Means Needs Are Met

46:58 Stop Tying Worth to Achievement

49:49 You Are Good Enough

The Certainty of Being Uncertain | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 7 Feb 04, 2022

Show notes

This week, I’m talking about what it feels like to be a mom, wife, friend, and human who does not always know what she is doing. From protecting my kids’ privacy to making uncertain parenting decisions, advocating for my tiny humans, and learning not to go straight into defense mode, this episode is about being certainly uncertain. I’m sharing the six words that have helped me in relationships, parenting, and conflict: “What do you mean by that?” If you feel unsure, overwhelmed, or like everyone else got the manual, come sit with me. We’re doing our best and giving God the rest.

00:00 Second Week in a Row

01:24 The Podcast Intro Goal

02:12 Protecting My Kids’ Privacy

03:29 Topics Y’all Asked For

04:42 I’m Not an Authority

05:32 Feeling Ill Equipped as a Parent

07:05 The Identities We Step Into

09:23 Learning Means Making Mistakes

10:35 Making Big Decisions for Tiny Humans

18:38 Giving Yourself Grace to Change Your Mind

19:05 Advocating for Corey

20:28 The Finger Scale for Big Feelings

22:28 Who Made the Rule?

23:19 The One Thing I’m Certain Of

25:21 Why We Go on Defense

27:19 Asking Before Reacting

31:50 Six Words That Change Conversations

34:08 Wait, Assess, Then Decide

38:11 It’s Okay to Be Certainly Uncertain

42:09 You Matter

Catching Up- Chatting Marriage & Therapy Things | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 6 Jan 27, 2022

Show notes

Hey y’all, I’m back and this one is a full catch up. From therapy and inner child work to platform Converse, clip in extensions, self sabotage in the school drop off line, and marriage conversations with Blake, I’m unpacking the freedom of letting myself be a little inconsistent. This is about the rules we carry from childhood, the lie of “I’m not that girl,” and the way relationships get healthier when we choose solving over winning. Parenting, marriage, personal growth, and doing our best, all in one long voicemail between friends.

00:00 Hey Girl, We’re Back

02:26 Back in Therapy

08:17 The Inner Child Year

09:26 The Converse Shoes Story

13:23 Identity and Imposter Syndrome

17:21 Dedicated to the Inconsistencies

19:40 Self Sabotage in the Car

23:16 The Lie of “I’m Not That Girl”

26:19 Tiny You Gets a Yes

31:35 Marriage Therapy Before Marriage

32:49 There’s No Me in We

35:19 Two Kinds of Arguments

40:50 Never and Always Are Dangerous Words

44:18 You Are Loved and Needed

Holding Trauma- Where Have I Been? Update | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 5 Dec 18, 2021

Show notes

In this episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m catching up on life, therapy, trauma work, Disneyland prep, and what I did not realize about healing: you can work through trauma and still be holding it.

I share how intrusive thoughts about my kids led me back to therapy, how losing my mom and brother shaped my fear, and how migraines, dizziness, jaw clenching, and exhaustion made me realize my body was sending an SOS.

This one is about asking for help, releasing survival habits, letting go of control, and giving ourselves grace when healing looks inconsistent.

00:01 Welcome Back And Catching Up

00:50 Missing The Moment And Disneyland Prep

01:11 Trauma Does Not Have To Be Comparative

02:19 How I Found My Therapist

03:02 Intrusive Thoughts About My Kids

04:50 Crying In The Closet

06:22 Mental Health Support For Kids

07:03 What Therapy Did Not Tell Me

07:26 Trauma Responses In Marriage

10:17 Holding Trauma In Your Body

11:24 The Doctor Appointment

14:27 When The Tension Finally Lifted

16:11 Cutting Caffeine And Finding Quiet

18:24 Self-Care Versus Real Care

19:32 Trauma Habits As Identity

20:13 Asking For Help And Feeling Strong

22:07 Peace, Control, And Letting Go

24:14 Identity, Social Media, And Showing Up

26:42 It Is Okay To Be Sporadic

29:14 Fear Before Disneyland

31:06 Questioning Old Rules

34:13 Accepting Who I Am Becoming

35:07 Thank You For Showing Up

Mental Health- The Oil Change We Ignore | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 4 Sep 30, 2021

Show notes

In this episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m talking about mental health, therapy, shame, faith, anxiety, and why getting support should not feel like something we have to hide.

I share what mental health looked like in my family growing up, how my mom’s breakdown shaped the way I saw therapy, how my brother’s addiction keeps me passionate about people not suffering alone, and why I think therapy is more like taking the car in for a tune up than admitting failure.

I’m not sharing this as a therapist. I’m sharing as someone who is still learning that needing support does not mean you are weak.

00:00 Welcome Back And Hawaii Anxiety

00:24 Why Mental Health Should Not Be Taboo

01:35 Therapy Is Asking For Support

02:48 My Family’s Mental Health Story

03:50 My Mom’s Breakdown

05:32 My First Introduction To Therapy

07:32 Addiction, Anxiety, And Fear Around Mental Health

09:34 Stop Invalidating Your Own Pain

12:09 Ignoring My Own Need For Help

13:43 Mental Health Is Like A Car Tune Up

16:19 Why Do We Apologize For Crying?

17:42 How I Found My Therapist

18:19 I Turned Out Fine, But Did I?

19:27 Why I Refuse To Stay Quiet

20:33 Kids, Therapy, And Support

21:50 Mental Health Days Should Be Normal

24:51 Mental Health Is Not A Lack Of Faith

26:47 Therapy Is A Lifelong Journey

28:09 Anxiety In The School Drop Off Line

29:14 Tools That Help My Mental Health

31:01 Therapy Is For Everyone

32:01 Boundaries Around Mental Health Shame

Parent Or Friend? The Choice They Want You To Make | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 3 Sep 22, 2021

Show notes

In this episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m talking about gentle parenting, humanizing kids, autonomy, emotional regulation, and why seeing my tiny humans as people does not mean I am just trying to be their friend.

I get into why I call them tiny humans, building responsibility through little daily moments, the myth that gentle parenting is permissive, yelling, silent treatment, apologies, boundaries, and why I want home to be the safe place where my kids learn what to do when the real world is hard.

This one is about giving kids a voice, not handing them the whole house.

00:00 Welcome Back And Maui Prep

01:13 A Hodgepodge Parenting Episode

03:25 Why I Say Tiny Humans

04:35 Autonomy Before The Teenage Years

06:17 Teaching Responsibility In Daily Life

08:20 Three Year Olds And Clean Rooms

10:54 Making Chores Functional For Kids

12:38 Gentle Parenting Is Not Permissive

14:15 Big Emotions Need Tools

15:28 I Turned Out Fine, But Did I?

16:35 Preparing Kids For The Real World

17:23 Yelling And Losing The Message

20:12 Hearing The Whine, Not The Words

21:51 Silent Treatment Is Emotional Manipulation

22:46 The Homework Apology

24:05 The Gentle Parenting Thought Process

26:26 Asking If They Need A Hug

28:55 When My Kid Called Me Out

31:55 Humanizing Parenting

34:07 Protecting Their Emotional Space

38:43 Lucy The Doll And Building Trust

41:32 Seeing Them As Human Is Not Being Their Friend

43:20 The Middle Ground Nobody Talks About

45:36 You Get To Build The Relationship You Want

Identity After Kids: It's Not a Power Struggle You Can Co-Exist | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 2 Sep 08, 2021

Show notes

In this episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m talking about the first day of school, mom guilt, motherhood, and why I do not think motherhood is just something happening to me. I think it is also something happening for me.

I share the note one of my girls left me, the poem that wrecked me, why I miss my tiny humans when they go back to school, and how motherhood has helped me become more myself instead of less.

This one is about coexisting, growing alongside our kids, letting go of mom-culture comparison, and remembering that they are having a hard time, not giving us one.

00:00 First Day Of School Feelings

00:50 Welcome To After Hours With Amanda

01:25 A Disclaimer For Moms

02:24 Encouragement Is Not Discouragement

03:47 The Mom Who Misses Her Kids

05:22 Lucy The Doll And The Paper Towel List

07:43 The Poem That Wrecked Me

09:03 Caterpillars, Butterflies, And Mom Life

11:45 Motherhood Is Not Happening To You

14:21 Bad Bitch Butterfly Energy

15:12 Feeding Yourself Better Thoughts

17:03 Are The Kids Really Stopping You?

19:12 They’re Having A Hard Time

21:09 Kids Are Not A Power Struggle

23:22 Letting My Kids Help Me Become

26:14 Missing Them Without Judging You

29:01 Stop Blaming The Tiny Humans

32:12 Functional Needs Versus Emotional Needs

36:29 Coexisting While We Both Grow

41:33 Encouragement And First Day Grief

42:29 My Mom’s Breakdown And Second Grade

45:31 Healing Through My Daughter’s First Day

47:27 What I Want You To Know

This Missing Ingredient of Self Love & the Journey to Find It | After Hours With Amanda Season 2 - Ep. 1 Sep 01, 2021

Show notes

In this season two episode of After Hours With Amanda, I’m talking about empathy, self-love, self-sabotage, therapy, and what it actually means to be kind to myself when nobody else is listening.

This one starts with therapy and physical activity, but it turns into a bigger conversation about Doc Martens, old wounds, motherhood, online criticism, comparison, and why empathy helps me parent my tiny humans with more softness.

I’m learning that pain does not have to be a competition, self-love has to become an action, and sometimes empathy is the thing that protects my energy.

00:01 Welcome Back To Season Two

00:44 The Heinz 57 Podcast

01:13 Missing You And Taking A Hiatus

03:08 Should The Podcast Change?

04:01 Joy And Empathy In The Unknown

05:01 Empathy For Myself

06:09 Therapy And Self-Sabotage

07:23 The Call Was Coming From Inside The House

09:17 Empathy As Real Self-Love

10:14 The Doc Martens Story

14:02 When The Silence Feels Too Loud

16:13 How I Talk To Myself