The Cryptonaut Podcast

Latest Episodes:

#454: E.S.M.B. Listener Stories Part 45: Return To Area X Oct 12, 2026

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The high strangeness continues at Area X with a Glimmer Man encounter, strange voices, UAPs, a towering black figure, and a spirit box that seems to know things it shouldn't.

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#453: Hitchhiking Horrors: Ono's Expedition Oct 05, 2026

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For decades the dangers of hitchhiking have been illustrated both in pop fiction and all-too-real accounts of those unlucky enough to have picked-up (or been picked-up by) the wrong person. But while stories surrounding the sundry horrors of violence, torture and murder are more than enough to keep most well clear of the hitchhiking scene, there's yet another factor that ought concern late night motorists; that of paranormal passengers capable of taking one on a ride so dark and twisted that those involved can only wish that they had heeded their parent's childhood warning… and never, ever talked to strangers.

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#452: The Gospel Of Miami Part 3: The Devil Smokes Newports Sep 28, 2026

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On Christmas morning, 1996, Bloody Mary and her mutinous minions took heaven by storm, Satan was betrayed, God barely escaped, the angels were exiled to Earth, and homeless children across the US began receiving dispatches from spectral messengers. In God's absence, the highest hope these already troubled kids had was to die a good death so they could be taken to a secret base in the Everglades and join a holy army of the living dead: a force led by an angelic underground, a couple of consecrated crocodilians and a mysterious Blue Lady who lives in the sea... Merry F#@%ing Christmas, it's the end of the world.

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#451: The Gospel Of Miami Part 2: Target Earth Sep 14, 2026

Show notes

On the holiest night of the year, the unthinkable happened: a vast horde of demons, led by the Virgin Mother and Satan's former ally—re-branded as a cruel combination of child-slaying La Llorona and the mirror-dwelling monstrosity known as Bloody Mary—came roaring from the fiery depths of Hell, stormed the gates of Heaven and, against all odds, became the new rulers of paradise. With Heaven under her control, Mary, armed with her blood-red rosary, once again whipped her hellish forces into a fury… Their next stop: Target Earth.

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

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#450: E.S.M.B. Syracuse Figure Sep 07, 2026

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A humanoid figure spotted in our own backyard! Human? Sasquatch? Other?

BFRO Report Link:https://www.bfro.net/GDB/show_report.asp?id=82485

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

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#449: The Gospel Of Miami Part 1: 1996 — The Fall Of Heaven Aug 31, 2026

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In late 1996—with the world teetering ever closer to the edge of a new millennium—something extraordinary began to spread among the youngest and most vulnerable of America's homeless population. It was a story. Not a rumor nor urban legend but a complex mythology that seemed to have erupted, fully-fledged, over the course of a single night. An underground phenomenon that spontaneously emerged from coast to coast—told by the dead to the living—detailing an epic battle between heaven and hell; wherein the utterly unthinkable occurred.

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

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#448: Patreon Clip Show Summer 2026: Centaurs, Lionoids, Ghost Cows and Headless Horrors. Aug 24, 2026

Show notes

The quest for vengeance has begun! Centaurs are in the mine, Lionoids are creeping behind you, a Ghost Cow is just around the corner and a Headless Horror haunts the Highlands.

Patreon EP #63: Are You Down With Centaurs? - Jun 27, 2021: https://www.patreon.com/cryptonautpodcast/posts/patreon-ep-63-52986305 https://ghostsofmagonia.blogspot.com/2020/12/subterranean-centaur-scare.html

Patreon EP #88: Lionoids - Dec 5, 2021: https://www.patreon.com/cryptonautpodcast/posts/patreon-ep-88-59547178

https://paranormal-world.fandom.com/wiki/Feline_Fiend_Frightens_Fishing_First-Graders

Patreon EP #133: Cowstarter and the Demijohn - Oct 16, 2022:https://www.patreon.com/cryptonautpodcast/posts/patreon-ep-133-73369590 https://paranormal-world.fandom.com/wiki/The_Cambria_County_Ghost_Cow

Patreon EP #162: Quest for Vengeance - May 21, 2023: https://www.patreon.com/cryptonautpodcast/posts/patreon-ep-162-83325274 https://paranormal-world.fandom.com/wiki/Headless_Horror_of_the_Highlands

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

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#447: E.S.M.B. Crypto Hotline Part 3: Reality Glitch, Orange Rods, CE5, Dogman and Bigfoot Encounters Aug 17, 2026

Show notes

An airplane to seems disappears into thin air. A listener crosses paths with an orange rod and possibly a Dogman. A group of teenagers fire a bottle rocket at Bigfoot… and get way more than they bargained for.

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

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#446: E.S.M.B. Listener Stories Part 44: The Phantom Rider & the One Legged Thing Aug 10, 2026

Show notes

Something stole a man from his bed. A cyclist raced through solid walls. And a one legged thing hopped out of a child's nightmares and into reality.

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

The Cryptonaut Podcast Patreon:https://www.patreon.com/cryptonautpodcast The Cryptonaut Podcast Merch Stores:Hellorspace.com - Cryptonautmerch.com

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#445: Flatwoods Monster Redux Part 7: It Never Ends Aug 03, 2026

Show notes

The paranormal pandemonium that had engulfed Braxton County in the summer of '52, was finally beginning to ebb. But this odyssey of the bizarre would never truly end and the legacy of the Flatwoods Incident is one that will likely endure for the ages.

The Cryptonaut Hotline:315-370-6853

The Cryptonaut Podcast Patreon:https://www.patreon.com/cryptonautpodcast The Cryptonaut Podcast Merch Stores:Hellorspace.com - Cryptonautmerch.com

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