Absolutely Not

Latest Episodes:

Body by Butter with Cortney LaCorte Sep 30, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather welcomes Cortney LaCorte, the original Cheese Gal, from Nashville. Her first cook book, Oversharing, is now a NY Times best selling cookbook. They chat about their love of martinis, umami flavors and a death row meal. You will definitely get hungry listening to this. They take voicemails from people who hate a boring party, people who bring extra guests and their thoughts on a potluck.

Episode Sponsors:

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Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Ole Miss By A Million Sep 23, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather is back after a weekend in Mississippi and fighting for her life with her weekly sinus infection. She chats about ladies in the Delta, the Ole Miss Game as well as saying goodbye to the office studio. We have cruise updates and how she is ramping up for her special press tour. She has callers with chatty masseuses, nail issues, as well as some single guy friends who are coming on the cruise.

Episode Sponsors:

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Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely

Right now, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Just visit ProlonLife.com/absolutely to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift.

Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ribeye, new york strip, or filet mignon in every box for a year — with free shipping always.

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely. Use our link so they know we sent you.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Return of Baby Angel: Connor Wood Sep 18, 2026

Show notes

On this replay episode from March 2024, Heather welcomes Conor Wood to Absolutely Not and gives him some sage advice before he sets out on his first tour. Now a few years later, he has grown from Fibula to Dancing with the Stars.

Episode Sponsors:

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Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ribeye, new york strip, or filet mignon in every box for a year — with free shipping always.

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely. Use our link so they know we sent you.

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Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Quiet on the Creek with Justin Sylvester Sep 16, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather welcomes Justin Slyvester to the pod post Emmys! After doing it up all night at the after parties, they kiki about how he got his start as a “lady-sitter” at crazy southern weddings, his cross-country move to be Kyle Richards assistant, and how they were both up for the co-hosting job at the Today Show. They get to your voicemails and chat about their love of taking fabulous vacations with rich white ladies.

Episode Sponsors:

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Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Honey Deuce Diva Sep 09, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather is coming to you from the NYC studio fresh off some press interviews for her new special. She chats about her amazing day at the US Open as well as getting into fights with boomers. She takes voicemails about boys at the gym, Facebook marketplace finds and is left with a very serious question, Where Is Megan?!

Episode Sponsors:

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.

Right now, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ribeye, new york strip, or filet mignon in every box for a year — with free shipping always.

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Caucasian Chicken Salad Sep 02, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather is panicked after the passing of Dolly Parton and Tim Curry and is worried about who will be next. She is buying deep freezers, life straws and searching for sustainable beef. She takes voicemails from people wondering what we can eat, being a type B person, and a newlywed with some questions. We get a final voicemail that brings Heather to realization that we all need to stop bitching.

Episode Sponsors:

Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ribeye, new york strip, or filet mignon in every box for a year — with free shipping always.

Right now, Merit Beauty is offering our listeners their Signature Makeup Bag – which if you’ve seen it, it’s not just a make-up bag but really an accessory – free with your first order at meritbeauty.com.

Right now, podcast listeners can save up to 48% off their first order at pendulumlife.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off your first order.

Just visit ProlonLife.com/absolutely to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift.

Visit WACOAL.com and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 10% off your first purchase. Offer valid for new customers only. Limit one code per customer.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rewind: We Know What She Did Last Summer with Jennifer Love Hewitt Aug 28, 2026

Show notes

On this episode from July 3rd, 2019 Heather sits down with Jeff’s biggest crush of all time, Jennifer Love Hewitt. They discuss how she went from Kids Incorporated to a top Hollywood producer and all around bad bitch. They talk about love, grief, family and laugh through the pain of Hollywood.

Episode Sponsors:

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Goodwipes wants your booty to have a SCENTSATIONAL SUMMER! Buy any two packs of goodwipes at your favorite retailer, text them your receipt, and get reimbursed almost immediately for one of them. For more details, head to goodwipes.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Visit drinksilentflower.com/golf-widow and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 15% off your first order

Upgrade your everyday. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to Quince.com/absolutely. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Where’s the Beef with Logan Crosby Aug 26, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather is joined by one of her favorites, Logan Crosby. Logan will be joining us on the cruise again this year, but he also has his own new music that he is super excited about. While celebrating almost one year sober, Logan talks about how life has changed since the last time on the pod. They chat about the Clermont Lounge, senior pranks as well as the controversial Callaway golf ad.

Episode Sponsors:

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Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely.

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Head to myGoldenChild.com/Absolutely and save up to 20% when you subscribe.

Find Primal Kitchen dressings, sauces, and condiments at your local grocery store or on Primalkitchen.com. Primal Kitchen - made for real food.

For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code ABSOLUTELYNOT.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Say What? It’s the 400th! Aug 19, 2026

Show notes

On this episode, Heather celebrates the 400th episode of the podcast. She is confused about how this is not the 4000th. Christina (aka Tina) joins in with some games and memories from over the years of working together on Absolutely Not.

Episode Sponsors:

Head to https://www.squarespace.com/absolutely to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code absolutely.

Join Wayfair Rewards today to get 5% back on every purchase and start saving on your next home upgrade.

Visit hillhousehome.com and use code ABSOLUTELYNOT at checkout for 20% off your first purchase of $150 or more.

The Korean skincare brand everyone is talking about. Our listeners get 20% off their entire order by using code ABSOLUTELY at jiyuskin.com/ABSOLUTELY #JIYU #ad

Visit DRINKAG1.com/ABSOLUTELY to grab the NEW AG1 Essentials Gummies today!

To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to MINTMOBILE.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Go to ButcherBox.com/absolutely to get $20 off your first box, plus your choice of free ground beef for life, or free chicken thighs or top sirloins in every box for a year —with free shipping always.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Bonus: Heathers Stick Together with Heather Shaw Aug 14, 2026

Show notes

On this bonus episode, Heather welcomes Heather Shaw to the studio. Shaw is most known for her uncanny Jim Carrey impression and being vegan and sober. These two outspoken broads chat about if that was really Jim on the carpet a few months ago, the illuminati and other conspiracies. She is currently on the road and you can watch her special, Alright, See Ya!, on Youtube.

Episode Sponsors:

To get your new wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, go to MINTMOBILE.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Visit OliveandJune.com/ABSOLUTELY20 for 20% off your first System!

Download the Bilt app and join the membership for where you live, at joinbilt.com/absolutely.

Find Primal Kitchen dressings, sauces, and condiments at your local grocery store or on Primalkitchen.com. Primal Kitchen - made for real food.

Visit Carawayhome.com/NOT10 to take an additional 10% off your next purchase.

Visit WACOAL.com and use code ABSOLUTELY at checkout for 10% off your first purchase. Offer valid for new customers only. Limit one code per customer.

Right now, podcast listeners can save up to 48% off their first order at pendulumlife.com/ABSOLUTELY.

Produced by Dear Media.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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