Connexions

243: Speaking The Truth About Death Aug 26, 2023

How do I approach uncomfortable topics such as cancer and death with my children? How do I share with my children about a loved one with limited time?

The movement of life is vulnerable. The Truth is that death is a part of this vulnerable movement. Children need to know that death is part of the existence we live in. Learning to mourn and grieve is a Truthful movement. Grieving is a principle of Truth.

Is there a difficult reality going on in your home that needs to be shared with small children? If so, listen and share this podcast.

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242: Keeping Kids Safe in a Predatory Society Aug 19, 2023

It is no surprise that children are growing up in a predatory society. Businesses, schools, governments and special interest groups are all finding ways to exploit and make profits off of our children. How do we, as the adults in their lives, keep them safe?

Humans are the most intelligent of all the animal kingdom; yet, we are the only parents who show our babies how to move towards, instead of away from, predators. Animals teach their young to follow their intuition and run away from predators. We as humans supply our young with access to predators.

Listen to one simple change you can make in your household today that will significantly protect your child from those who would cause harm. Teach your young how to arm themselves with protection, using one very simple principle.

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241: Holding Onto Trauma Will Make You Sick Aug 12, 2023

The Truth about experiencing life is that most of us have experiences that are upsetting and even traumatizing. This is absolutely part of the human experience.

The Truth is we are not meant to stay there in those experiences. We are meant to move through the upset and the trauma.

What about PTSD? Can a person with post traumatic stress disorder, still move through their trauma? Can Truth heal someone who has been in therapy for years and is still triggered by sights, sounds, smells and memories?

Listen and find out for yourself how honesty, responsibility and humility are tools ANYONE can use to create a life of connection.

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240: Distorted Boredom Aug 05, 2023

Boredom comes from a desire to connect but not wanting to be responsible for doing what’s necessary to connect. Boredom is a conundrum of wanting stimulus but feeling inconvenienced at the work it will take to feel that stimulus.

Have you ever had a child react in aggression when they were bored because you wouldn't jump in and entertain them? If so, here is a child who is putting the responsibility to FEEL onto you, the parent. They are saying, “It’s YOUR job to make me feel better.” Anytime a person places the responsibility of their emotions onto another, that person is acting out his/her distorted perceptions.

Boredom is not to be feared! It is a choice! Come learn how empty spaces of time can lead to creativity in Truth or boredom in distortion.

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239: Drinking And Drugs Are Not The Problem Jul 29, 2023

Your child is on the brink of turning 18 and you find out that he's drunk at his friend's house.

You're shocked! You thought he was safe. You call and tell him you're coming to pick him up.

What type of boundaries do you, as the parent hold?

Drinking is not really the issue at this point. Drinking is a symptom of his aggression, of his fear of his irresponsibility, of his entitlement, of his distortion, of his fear that he's not enough. His entitlement and lack of empathy, his dishonesty and irresponsibility is at the root of his belief that he is not enough.

So what do you do as a parent when you want to live in Truth?

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238: Parable of the Pineapple Jul 22, 2023

In today's podcast, I'm sharing with you a family parable I have taught my children for years. The Parable of the Pineapple!

When my son was very young, he made a dishonest choice and tried to conceal it through a lie. Distortion begets more distortion. That's a consistent pattern! In order to break the pattern of distortion, Truth needs to be inserted!

Give this parable a listen! You will all relate to tired parenting, mighty messes and sticky floors. Helping a child understand the messes they create and how they affect everyone in the home is an important lesson every child needs. Pointing out distortion to your child is an act of love and service. Without the help of a guiding parent, children will never know the full extent their distortions "stick!"

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237: Mother's Instinct to Protect Jul 15, 2023

How can we wake up the women of this world and get them back to their natural instincts?

Every animal in this world has protective instincts.

As mothers, the women, the humans have lost their motherly instincts to protect their young. Women choose to hook up and be sexual with males who also are numb and have lost their fatherly instincts because both the men and the women of this world are not being nurtured, they're not being taught truth, they are not being truly loved.

Listen to how this woman is invited to use her agency, her choices to protect her young, her baby.

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236: "Preserve" the Relationship Jul 12, 2023

In this podcast, a mother asks how she can preserve a relationship with her adult children.

Preservation is an outcome of applied principles. For example, preserving meat requires application of salt, brine, time drying and/or freezing temperatures.

The idea of "preserving" a relationship also requires application of principles. Tune in and see how a mother is encouraged to "preserve" her relationships by sharing the Truth with her adult children who aren't so eager to hear it.

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235: My Child's Caliber of Choices Jul 08, 2023

What do I choose?

Do I choose to be honest, regardless of the outcomes? Am I willing to be humble and recognize when I choose poorly?

These Truthful choices create a strong, sturdy foundation inside my child.

I invite everyone listening to this podcast, to develop love for themselves by insisting they make choices inside Truth. You cannot buy self-esteem. You can’t word, “I love you,” in just the right way to make a person feel their self-worth. This belief will only create more dissonance from the thing that really does remind them of their self-worth . . . which is God.

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234: I'm Responsible For What Comes In My Home Jul 05, 2023

What if I am indebted to another person and I’m not able to return the favor, would that be distorted?

This mother wants to know if she is obligated to follow through on a favor she believes she is responsible for, even if it puts her children at risk.

Remember, my first responsibility is to create a home of safety for myself and my immediate family. I create a home of safety by being rigorously personally responsible, impeccably honest and vulnerably humble. I protect my loved ones, for whom I have stewardship. Only after these obligations are met, am I available to consider other obligations.

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233: Can Fear Ever Be Truthful? Jul 01, 2023

Are there fears that aren’t distorted, but rather a part of the human experience?

How can I differentiate between a fear that is reasonable and Truthful and a fear that is distorted?

Come listen and find out!

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232: Can You Go Overboard on Boundaries? Jun 27, 2023

Come, listen to a mother work through her distortions of holding boundaries with her child. The mother shares that she feels guilty for saying, "no," to her child. This mother may resemble others who fear that holding boundaries will create separation in relationships, instead of connection.

The Truth is, boundaries are based in responsibility. Responsibility always brings connection. When boundaries appear to drive another away, what you are actually witnessing is the unwillingness of the person walking away. This mother has a responsibility to teach her child through Truthful application of boundaries. And the child has the responsibility to be honest and responsible around those set boundaries.

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231: Taking Responsibility for Childhood Trauma . . . Through Forgiveness Jun 24, 2023

Addiction . . . whether you're the one addicted or you're on the other side of someone's addiction, either way it is a nightmare. It's a hell where everyone is living in fear, abandonment, chaos, disconnection, entitlement, confusion, loneliness.

And so so many other characteristics that the addicted and the loved ones of the one that's addicted go through, especially when Children are involved. There is no escape for a child. They are trapped in a dynamic of needing emotional, physical, spiritual attention and most often none of those needs are met.

Come listen to how this woman maneuvers how to forgive her mother who was addicted and how you too can offer forgiveness without being enabling.

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230: Honor Thy Father & Thy Mother . . . Even When They Are In Distortion Jun 21, 2023

Honor thy father and thy mother.

These are words of wisdom. These words of wisdom are patterns that bring peace and connection in a family. So what do I do? How do I honor my father and mother when their choices are destructive.

Honoring does not mean exposing myself to abuse. Honoring does not mean to do what the parent wants me to do, at the risk of my own responsibility.

Come listen, I am going to talk about what honoring does mean.

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229: How Parents Manage When Children Won't Manage Themselves Jun 17, 2023

What do you do when you find out something that your child, your teen, is doing and the thing they are doing is in violation of principles? Most parents take what their children are doing, personal; they react. Then, what the child is doing becomes about you instead of keeping the thing that your child is doing about them and their choices

to violate principles.

The reality. . . the Truth is that it is your child, your teen who is choosing, not you. Your responsibility always is to reflect Truth and reality to them.

So how do you do that? How do you teach your child your teenager about principles and about boundaries.

Most parents either ignore what they find out or they flip out. Few parents see this is a cry for help. Your child is saying I need help and even fewer parents know how to

help them come.

Listen to what help actually looks like by teaching your children principles.

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228: Be A Peacemaker Jun 14, 2023

In proverbs we read that all contention comes through pride. Pride is at the root of all contention. Pride is another word for a lack of humility. When I lack humility I do not take responsibility for myself. . . I am living in distortion. When I live in distortion, I am a contention maker.

If I want to be a peacemaker, I need to choose humility. I do this by choosing to be honest and responsible for my thoughts, feelings and behaviors.

Come and listen to how you can create peace in your home through honesty, responsibility and humility.

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227: Counterfeits of Connection Jun 10, 2023

All people need to be cared for. They need to be validated. They need to be invited into connection. All people need to be seen and heard and treated with care.

Listen to how this child was attempting to secure those very Truthful characteristics, yet instead, because she didn’t know where to find them, she started spending time with people who would give her the counterfeits. She spent time around people who needed connection but were actually choosing disconnection. She became enslaved in behavior that left her hallow and isolated.

All of us are looking for the same things. We are all looking for validation and connection and we don’t have a clue where to find it. We need Truth, connection, safety and trust. And where does this begin? It begins with me using my agency to choose it.

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226: Can I GET Others to Live in Truth? Jun 07, 2023

Learning principles of Truth is exciting! Many desire to share what they learn with family and friends. And we hope you will!

Sharing our zeal and awareness with others is enjoyable when others share in the enthusiasm. A woman writes in that she is enthusiastic for Truth and wants to know how she can GET others to also live in Truth. While I share her desire for close friends and family to also live in Truth, find out how this request is actually control.

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225: Fruits of Living in Truth Jun 03, 2023

What does it take to live in Truth? The answer is it takes a person's willingness to stay in reality, use your choices and choose Truth.

Why is Truth/Reality so uncomfortable that many people run from it? The answer is, there's pain in reality. There's pain, inevitable pain inside reality from things like loss, death, hurt, disappointments, loneliness, anger, greed, rage.

And most people think that they can run from it, that they can hide from those things.

The truth is when you attempt to leave reality, you run right into the arms of distortion and now you really will have pain.

Listen to how not to be deceived.

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224: Where Does Compassion Fit In? May 31, 2023

Compassion means combining elements of suffering and Truth and wielding them to obtain a higher purpose. Compassion is to be moldable through suffering.

Compassion is only possible in Truth.

Compassion aligns with, accentuates, compliments and fuels honesty, responsibility and humility. Compassion is the great motivator of Truth. It is not possible to support a person in distortion and call it compassion. Compassion always leads a person back to Truth.

Come listen and learn the etimology, symptomology and characteristics of compassion. Also discover the compassion’s counterfeit that masquerades as validation and love.

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223: Gen Z Desires Truth May 27, 2023

Truth is rare to find in our world. It’s even more rare to find someone who actually chooses to live inside the Truth. To find a person who is honest, responsible and humble is difficult. Why is that? Why are there so few people who choose to live inside values and principles?

Today’s podcast talks of a young woman who finds herself in an environment where few to no people are choosing Truth. Though she knows she wants to live inside Truth, she is sad that so few people desire it as well.

Listen to her journey. Hopefully, you will be inspired to choose and live in Truth yourself.

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222: Denial Around Eating Disorders May 24, 2023

When I choose not to be honest, responsible and humble, I will choose to be irresponsible, dishonest and prideful.

These irresponsible behaviors are what we use to control the discomfort of reality. Each person has their own flavor of control. Some examples of controlling behaviors include, picking skin and biting fingernails, staying up all night playing video games, smoking, scrolling on social media, over-eating. The controlling behavior I’m focusing on today is the refusal to eat.

I answer a mother’s question about her daughter’s lying to cover up a developing eating disorder. Controlling behaviors are always accompanied with manipulation, lying and hiding. The manipulation, lying and hiding create a “protective” barrier for the controlling behavior, which is “protecting” discomfort and pain. This young woman is creating a layered cocoon of control. She is building walls and doesn’t want her mother to tap into what is really going on.

Listen to how confused this mother becomes as she chases her daughter’s lies instead of going straight to the heart of the issue.

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221: My Son Wants to Wear Girl Clothes, Addressing Confusion with Principles May 20, 2023

What does it mean to "want to dress like a girl?" What would a girl dress like?

Well, some people would say, "wear a dress," "wear pastels," "wear heels," "curl your hair," "put on makeup," etc.

The Truth is there is no Truth to that. I, for example, am a girl and I dress very differently than those descriptors above. What you place on your body has zero to do with you genetically being a girl or a boy.

So what's going on?

Why are men and women demanding and inserting that they are in the wrong bodies? Come listen to how people are being invited into this confusion all from a place of looking for connection, listen to how they are being lied to and why it is so easily believed.

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220: Parenting Without Village Support May 17, 2023

Parents, are you waking up to the reality that we are living in a world where we as moms and dads in Truth are not being supported?

Can you feel the war being waged against raising children in Truth? It’s real! Distortion is constantly and deliberately battling Truth. And what better way for distortion to gather allies, than to flatter children with promises that they can have what they want?

Standing for Truth, making necessary sacrifices and telling children “no," as village support is nowhere to be found, is almost unbearable . . . almost.

Parents, we brought children into this world and we need to stand by them as we guide them in principles of honesty, responsibility and humility. Allowing teachers, counselors, coaches, church leaders or any other person take higher authority in our children’s lives is neglecting the sacred role of parent.

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219: My Child Doesn't Want to Go to Church May 13, 2023

Many people very intentionally decide to have children and some of us very intentionally decide not to have Children.

And yet there are some of us who engage in sexual activity and then act shocked that they are going to be a parent! Regardless of whether a child is planned for and desired or whether a child is unexpected and catches you off guard, you are going to be a parent and parents are required to be responsible. You may ask what in the world am I responsible for in parenting a child?

Your primary responsibility is to teach your child about principles-about how to be honest, responsible and humble.

Today we will learn how to teach honesty, responsibility and humility when your child decides he/she doesn't want to go to church any longer.

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218: The Internally Motivated Child vs the Externally Motivated Child May 10, 2023

In every decision that I make, I am responsible to understand my motive.

Why am I doing this? Who am I doing this for? What did I expect?

Knowing my motive is critical if I am to live inside truth. When I am unaware of my motive, I will default into living a life of distortion.

Join me in answering this mother's question about her daughter's motives. Why is this daughter showing up irresponsibly and lying? And how will this mother approach the daughter and help this daughter to see that her motives are in distortion?

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217: Teaching Truth to Toddlers May 06, 2023

Are you someone who believes that a one or two year old cannot understand principles? At what age do you think they're able to understand?

What if you enable them to live in distortion . . . which means you're not honest with them, you don't encourage them to be responsible, you don't hold boundaries with them, you lie to them about people and about their environment because you want to be comfortable . . . and then when they turn five, you want to teach them the Truth?

Do you think they will then be interested in changing? My experience tells me, no. Distortion is a space where a person or a child appears to get what they want and

then they're not interested in getting what they actually need, which is the Truth.

Come learn how a parent of a little child is trying to change their perception from distortion back into the Truth and how difficult it is because they did not start when they were younger.

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216: Demanding Adult Children May 03, 2023

How do I connect with a loved one when the loved one only takes?

Is it possible to wallow in a pigpen and not get muddy? These questions pull at the heartstrings of parents and grandparents all over the world.

Selfish entitlement cannot demand a relationship.

Relationships are carefully built, one Truthful choice at a time. Just as a home cannot stand without a solid foundation, neither can a relationship be demanded or coerced.

Honesty, responsibility and humility are foundational to any loving connected relationship.

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215: Is My Child Ready to Date? Apr 29, 2023

Teenagers who want to date? When is that experience appropriate for your teen? Is there a certain age when kids are ready to date?

I would say no, there's not an age, but I would say that there's a baseline that you don't even consider that your child begins to go one on one with the opposite sex until they are 16 years old. And then just because they're 16, doesn't mean that they are mature in such a way to be alone with the opposite sex.

Kids are ready to date when they can give you evidence over the course of months and years that they know how to use their choices to be honest, responsible and humble. So you as the parent need to know and need to live in Truth as well so that you'll be able to see whether they're being honest, responsible and humble or not. If you are not living that way, you are only going to reflect the bar to the degree that you live.

So you have a child, your job is to model and to hold boundaries and to reflect their responsibility of their thoughts, their feelings and their behaviors, no matter what age they are. So when they start hitting their teenage years, they are ready and mature and confident about themselves. So when they start spending time one on one with the opposite sex, they are not a shell, they have self esteem and they don't feel any need to take from the other person.

Come learn what honest, responsible and humble look like and make sure that your teenager gives you years of evidence that they know how to make honest, responsible and humble choices.

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214: Denial of Death Leads to Destructive Living Apr 26, 2023

This life affords each human three guarantees. One is the opportunity to experience a physical body of flesh and blood. Two, the freedom to exercise agency to choose. And three, the realization of death. Each of us will experience the ending of life. We are all mortal.

Just as our bodies differ in function, health and strength, so do our bodies differ in when and how death comes.

Have you experienced the death of a loved one? Did you accept or deny the reality? Grieving, sadness, shock, anger, resentment and even destructive behaviors are all responses you may have chosen.

Come listen for Truth and distortion inside a young man's experience losing a loved one.

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213: The Antidote to Suicide Apr 22, 2023

I'm done living. I can't do this any longer. I'm trapped. I want out. This is too hard. This person is experiencing much darkness.

They feel lost, they feel confused, they feel trapped. They don't know where to turn.

Darkness means that they are being lied to . . . by distortion.

Distortion lies to the individual and tells them that there's no way out.

Distortion says gigs up, you've lost, you're too much of a bother.

This person needs to have someone speak truth to them.

Truth sounds like this. You are not trapped. There are options. You just can't see them at this point. You are loved and then explain what love actually means.

The person done living needs another person to be honest with them and to tell them what the reality is. They need people around them who will support and educate them how to speak the Truth about the reality. And then ultimately, that person needs to take that Truth and speak it to themselves.

People can pull out of the pressing thoughts of doom with the Truth.

Come learn how to speak truth and invite others to do the same.

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212: Fighting the REAL Enemy in Your Home Apr 19, 2023

The way a family talks with each other reveals a lot about the connection or the disconnection in the home.

Have you ever asked a child how their day was and was given a shrug of the shoulders?

Does your spouse sigh when you talk about spending Saturday cleaning up the yard and home?

What response do you face when you announce unexpected plans?

Do you find your family asking more often for “fun” things to do rather than ways to serve?

Connecting as a family may not be as far off as you think. And the resources for bringing Truth and light back into your home is one choice away.

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211: Parent & Teen Tug-of-War Apr 15, 2023

What does control look like?

What does it speak like?

What does it sound like?

What does it feel like to control and to be on the other side of someone inviting you into control?

Today's podcast is about a mom who wants to, "help her daughter." However, her help and her willingness to make sure that her daughter is healthy is coming in the form of control. The mother does not want to allow the daughter's choices to be autonomous. And so there is a tug of war here. This is about the mother learning to surrender, surrender what? Surrender her control and what she wants her daughter to do. So come and listen and see if the mother is willing to let go of control.

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210: What Does a Manipulative Parent Sound Like? Apr 12, 2023

Manipulation means to handle or control in a skillful manner.

Am I a parent who manipulates?

When I manipulate in Truth I handle and control the only person I can control - MYSELF! I also invite my child to recognize, feel and then accept personal responsibility for every choice they make.

When I manipulate in distortion I am creating an illusion that I can control my child. I minimize, justify and distract from my own choices and my child’s accountability for their choices.

Where do I live . . . Inside Truth or inside distortion?

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209: From Teen Pregnancy to Responsibility Apr 08, 2023

I had children as a teen . . . not my best choice.

I want God back in my life and I want my kids to obey me and they don't. How can I have both of these outcomes that I want?

Come listen to this podcast about a teen mother who made very selfish choices when she was a teenager and now she is having the outcomes.

She really likes many of the outcomes and many she doesn't.

Well, the Truth is you can have God in your life. That is an outcome you can have because it's all within your control to put Him back in your life. He's been waiting to be a part of your life ever since you left Him.

Having your kids obey you is a different story. They have their own agency and you can't control your children. So those are the outcomes you don't like.

You can learn to put up boundaries around your children in such a way that they will be invited to make different choices, to listen and follow.

You come and listen and learn how to do this.

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208: Standing in Truth Without Family Support Apr 05, 2023

Can I choose in Truth?

How can I choose the Truth, knowing on the other end, I'm going to have family and friends choose to leave my life?

What principle can I exercise that will strengthen me and give me a base to support living inside my integrity?

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207: Teens Numb Responses to Pornography Mar 31, 2023

It is alarming to watch children be so numb and disconnected to their choices.

Here's a child who used their phone to send and receive pictures of lewd and lascivious behavior. Children are engaging in criminal behavior and are not aware of the seriousness of what they're doing.

Are children being groomed to engage in child pornography?

Yes!

Are Children aware of the emotional, spiritual, sexual, physical consequences or outcomes of what they're doing?

No!

Are their parents aware of those consequences of what is happening with their Children?

No!

Come and listen and wake up.

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206: Truth & Religion Mar 29, 2023

How do I know if religion is in the Truth?

How do I know if MY religion is in the Truth?

If the Bible is the Truth, then how do I know if the interpretation is also in the Truth?

What can I do to be responsible inside my own religious choices?

Knowing principles and how to use them will help me navigate this confusion!

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205: Millennials Desire to Live in Truth Mar 25, 2023

Are millennials listening to the Truth? Many millennials are full of distortion, they attack others, they blame others. They expect people to take care of them from cradle to grave. They want money distributed to them without them earning it. They act entitled and they are quite selfish and we hear from them.

True?

Yet . . . this millennial is also out there and wants to be heard and understood that she is a hard worker. She is honest, she is not entitled and she is responsible and humble!

She is grateful for principles and her ability to choose as she wishes. She has learned how to use her choices to be honest, responsible and humble.

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204: Are Makeup & Hair Color Distorted? Mar 22, 2023

Is it distorted to wear makeup or color your hair or get Botox, or maybe lip fillers?

How about plastic surgery? Is it distorted to wear fancy dresses or lose weight or to get your nails done? Where is the Truth when you're grooming yourself?

This is going to be a really fun podcast to listen to! I go to the heart of the motives behind these questions and look at the guiding principles of how to know if I'm in

Truth when applying and working with my physical body. This podcast goes to the heart of the distraction or the connection inside my decisions around my physical body.

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203: Teaching Tenacious Children Truth Mar 18, 2023

I have met several parents who have said, "I have a child and she's fiery and fierce! What do I do?" And I will smile at them and say, "That's good. She's animated about life."

Did you know that a child's energy can be turned towards Truth? You can take that energy, that fire, that fierceness, that excitement for life and angle her into Truth.

What this child needs is a mother and a father who both know how to angle that energy,

how to bridle that passion and reflect the Truth to her. It's the ability of the parents that teaches the child how to live and be boundaried inside Truth.

Come listen and learn how.

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202: Be a Refuge for Your Loved Ones Mar 15, 2023

How can I help a family member living in distortion?

Where is my responsibility when I witness self-destructive behaviors?

Is there a way for me to be an influence for Truth when my loved ones reject the Truth?

Listen for unchanging principles as I speak to a young woman about being a refuge for her little sister.

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201: The Three Pillars of Self-Esteem Mar 11, 2023

Where does self-esteem come from?

Was I born with it?

What is self-esteem?

Exactly how do I know when I've found it?

People commonly think self-esteem is something that is lost and they need to find it.

But the Truth is, self esteem or self love is an outcome of using your choices, your free-will to choose, to be honest, responsible and humble.

Yep, that's the Truth! Come and learn how to develop self-esteem.

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200: Don't Get Stuck in Parental Regret Mar 08, 2023

Every mother and every father have made choices where they gave their child access to something that was harmful.

Whether it was the peanut butter you offered, the hot food you served, the internet you introduced or a family member you gave access to ... each parent has had experiences they wish they could go back and change.

It is so critical to understand that your choices don't mean you're bad and it doesn't mean you have to live in regret the rest of your life.

The Truth is you get to use those experiences to create wisdom inside of you.

Mourning and growing from painful regret is what we're going to talk about today.

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199: Truthful Protective Anger Mar 04, 2023

Anger ...

Why do so many of us struggle with managing it?

I hear often, "I need to control my anger," "I hurt people with my anger," "My anger is out of control," "Anger is bad," "Anger scares me."

However, anger is an emotion and if used inside the Truth, can be a protection to you. Anger?? ... can protect you? and anger can protect others? A resounding Yes

So for example, when you see some type of violation of Truth, like children being sex trafficked, I feel angry. Or any kind of violation that harms a child or someone who's defenseless, I feel angry; and that anger moves me to protect them.

How can I become aware of why I'm angry? What I need to do is look at my perceptions my thoughts and scrutinize them for the Truth.

Are you interested in learning how to manage anger inside Truth? Anger is a wonderful emotion if you're willing to choose to use it Truthfully.

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198: Break Your Dependency on Social Media Mar 01, 2023

When I think of a security blanket, I think of Linus from Charlie Brown! Linus carried his security blanket wherever he went. That thing became a dusty, tattered, nasty little piece of cloth! How many of you have a security blanket?

Has a person, an action, a hobby, a sport, a Tv show or some kind of engagement become your security blanket?

Well ... I looked up "security blanket" in the dictionary.

Security Blanket: An imposition that helps keep a secret.

How many of you are carrying around security blankets because you want to get comfort out of it? However, you're actually using your security blanket to cover up a secret?

Let's get into this woman's security blanket and find out what her motive is for carrying around a distorted security blanket.

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197: Why Parents Fear Intervening on Behalf of Their Child Feb 25, 2023

You see your child headed towards a cliff, a fiery building or a tidal wave of water. And yet so many parents say, "I don't want to get involved," or I don't want them to think I don't trust them or that they're incapable or I don't want them to get angry with me.

All of these statements are very selfishly focused on the person saying them. The kid is going to crash and burn and the parent or the adult who claims to love them is more worried about the outcomes if they get involved ... instead of the damage that will happen to the child.

What is going on here?

Why do so many of us as parents become so selfish and refuse to intervene when we see our children using their agency-their choices to be destructive?

Parents, we have one job and one job only, and that is to direct our Children towards principles of truth, which means: talk with them, intervene on their behalf, support them to see the distortions, let them know that you don't trust them because they're kids. They're not meant to be trusted! They're meant to be guided.

When you see them in distortion, then you guide those choices, hold boundaries with them until they evidence to you that they know how to choose principles of being honest, responsible and humble.

Are you willing to truly love them?

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196: Teaching Modesty to Teens Feb 22, 2023

Teaching the principle of modesty to your teen can be a challenge! Understanding the basic tenets of modesty will help give you language to teach, inspire and enlighten your child.

Modesty is about presenting yourself in humility, not about controlling the people around you.

Modesty is a principle of protection intended to safeguard the soul. Your teen is a soul who came from God and therefore has a need honor God. Dressing the body is an intimate experience between you and your creator, who made you. Modesty is for you!

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195: Are You Dealing With Entitled Adult Children? Feb 18, 2023

This is a hot topic ... adult children and their feelings of entitlement towards mom and dad taking care of the things they're responsible for.

Why do adult Children act entitled towards parents caring, helping, babysitting, supporting, etc.?

Do parents really have the freedom to say, "No, I'm not available"?

Or will these entitled children throw a fit and threaten them and kick them out of their lives?

Is this really love coming from the parents and also the kids? Or is there manipulation going on here, from both sides?

If an adult child becomes sick or if an adult child makes choices and creates chaos in their life, is it really the parent's responsibility to come in and clean it all up?

Come listen and find out how to navigate this thing—parents with adult entitled children?

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194: Truthful Choices in Womanhood Feb 15, 2023

Women have many choices today! They can choose to get married, become mothers, have careers, be home with their children, or have children and a career. With so many choices, it can be confusing which direction is best.

What if instead of asking, “What should I do?” we ask, “What is the responsible and honest choice for me?”

What is my calling? What is my passion? What is my Higher Power asking me to do? What is my responsibility?

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193: The Distortion Underneath Copping an Attitude Feb 11, 2023

What does it mean to cop an attitude? Attitude may mean that the child is being naughty, aggressive, won't follow directions, rude, evasive or manipulative.

All of these characteristics listed above are dishonest, irresponsible and not humble, which means distorted. A person or a child doesn't just one day begin to choose distortion. They have been engaging in distortion for an extended period of time and now you've noticed it. Why now? Why are you recognizing it now? What's changed? Who's to blame? Listen to how this parent learns about distortion and see if she's willing to take responsibility.

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192: There is No Truth to the Terrible Twos Feb 08, 2023

Is there any truth to the popular phase and phrase "the terrible twos"?

Is there a way to teach a two year old principles? How do I know what to pay attention to and what to let go of? Two year olds are learning to manage their physical, emotional and spiritual selves, and they have no life experience. Two year olds are on a crash course of learning about personal responsibility, and you the parent will need to have mastered personal responsibility in order to teach and model to the two year old self governance.

Perhaps the terrible twos is my invitation to finally master what my two year old now needs to learn.

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191: Entitlement is a Lack of Empathy Feb 04, 2023

When I think of the word entitlement, I think of someone who has lost feeling for another person.

I think of someone who, either hasn't been taught how to sacrifice for another person, or someone who has been taught to sacrifice and they have been making choices of selfishness.

And so they don't want to sacrifice for another person.

Whatever the age… the ability and willingness to feel for others- to have empathy for other’s experiences- is critical in order to have and maintain relationships.

Do you know how to teach yourself, or another how to choose empathy? Come and learn how!

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190: Navigating the Drama of Divorced Parenting Feb 01, 2023

Guiding children as a divorced parent can be a challenge.

How can I be a parent in Truth when I have another adult who is parenting from distortion, and bringing destruction into my child's life?

Is there a way that I can be strong without controlling? And how do I settle in my mind that the other parent is viewed as “the fun one” and I am

perceived as controlling?

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189: Man’s Law vs. God’s Law… Which Do I Follow? Jan 28, 2023

We live in a world of laws. There are man’s laws and there are God’s laws. God’s laws are asking us to keep, for example, the Ten Commandments. And Man’s laws unfortunately invite us at times to break God’s laws. How do you negotiate this discrepancy? I think of the time when some people were hiding the Jews in Nazi Germany… it was breaking man’s law! Yet, those people who were willing to hide those humans were keeping God’s law not to kill. How do you think through this conundrum? I would always invite you to follow the Truth, which is God’s law.

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188: Transforming Pain into Wisdom Jan 25, 2023

One of the greatest inhibitions in this life is the belief that my ignorant, selfish and distorted choices have now rendered me incapable of living a life of Truth.

…that somehow the mistakes, distorted perceptions and attitudes of yesterday now keep me today from living a life of joy, peace and connection.

This is a lie! This simply is not the Truth!

How then do I reconcile my choices of yesterday and live a life of rest today?

This podcast is all about the beautiful principle of wisdom and the transforming power of repentance!

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187: You vs. Me: The Monumental Setup Jan 21, 2023

A child said, "I had this experience when I was growing up and it was different from my friends and I didn't like the outcomes and so my experience was wrong or bad and unfair and their experience was fun and good and right." This comparison is always going to be a setup. Why? Because no two people have the same experience. It's "the grass is greener over there," thing. No two people look alike. And when you compare yourself with others, no two people have the same experiences, it's impossible. So you're gonna do one of two things. You're either going to elevate yourself above other people and say my experience was better than yours or you're going to denigrate yourself and go below other people and say my experience was not as good as your experience. You won't be able to find the truth in either place. Let's listen to this podcast and help you see the truth and help you find freedom from comparison.

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186: Why Some People Don't Want to Change Jan 18, 2023

Jody and I talk a lot about connection and why connection is so important. Connection is to the soul what food is to the body. Connection is a real need. This is what gives sustenance and substance, strength, fortitude and energy to the soul. Living inside Connection requires an individual to be honest, responsible and humble. So at the heart of connection there is work. Hard work. It's a lot of work to keep the physical body in good working order and there is a good deal of work involved in keeping the spirit and the soul and healthy working order also. So what if an individual doesn't like the work required? I'm sure we all know someone, maybe it's ourselves who likes the distorted version of ourselves better than the reality of ourselves. Hm! This is called Pride. Let's jump in and talk about what would drive a person to want to live inside distortion.

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185: Why Is There Jealousy in Who Is the Bread Winner? Jan 14, 2023

Jealousy, where does jealousy originate?

Specifically, when you are jealous over something in particular, such as someone who makes more money than you, maybe your friend makes more money than you, or maybe your spouse makes more money than you do.

Jealousy equals someone who is insecure. Jealousy only presents itself when someone doesn't have a solid sense of who they are.

Come listen to how this woman, this mother, makes more money than her spouse, and then how she uses her agency (her choices) to not make her husband's insecurity personal. His fears, his distortions, are not hers. Watch how I Jodi support her to use her own choices to choose Truth and keep herself untangled from his distorted fears. This is a skill and everyone needs to learn how to animate it.

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184: Boundaries Inside Sexual Intimacy Jan 11, 2023

Sexual intimacy is a principle of Truth. And because it is a principle of Truth there are inherent responsibilities guarding and protecting its use. Listen and learn the four main principles that support and direct the use of this sacred gift. The soul, marriage, safety and trust are all principles that, when chosen through agency, bring beautiful outcomes of connection and peace.

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183: GOT SELF-ESTEEM??? NEED SELF-ESTEEM??? Come Learn… What Is Your Responsibility! Jan 07, 2023

As parents we are often at a loss when our kids do things that are physically destructive such as drinking, smoking, vaping, any kind of drugs, acting out sexually, stealing, fighting and anything else that can be manifest in the physical realm we as parents seem to get really alarmed.

Yet when our children act out emotionally and spiritually in ways right in front of the face of the parent, the parents don't seem to care or even register that, that is soul destructive. So for example when children lie, manipulate, act entitled, are angry, they blame, they ignore, they swear, they take the Lord's name in vain, they keep secrets, they threaten, they refuse responsibility, they're dishonest, they're unwilling to be humble, they won't listen and on and on and on.

Your child's soul is of immeasurable worth and the thing that you need to be tracking is the emotional and the spiritual destruction. Because that is underlying all the physical manifestations of the destruction. And that spiritual side is the thing that is of the most value.

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182: Dieting and Distortion Jan 04, 2023

If you were to boil down the self-induced pains of an individual here's what you would find...

All self-sabotage comes down to the mishandling of the soul. The mishandling is often the result of not understanding the importance, the significance and the destiny of the soul.

The soul is the combined gift of the spirit and the physical body. You are more than a physical body alone and you are more than simply the spirit that dwells inside you. You are a gift. You are a creation of God.

Any neglect of the spirit for the trade-off of obsessing over the body will carry outcomes of pain, and conversely any neglect of the physical body for the hollowed-out hopes of the spirit will comply or get in line will also carry out outcomes of pain, and even death.

Caring for self means being honest, responsible and humble for the physical body as well as my spirit.

Building character and integrity includes the acceptance of all responsibilities of the physical body and the spirit demand of us.

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181: Do I Punish My Child or Hold Them Accountable? Dec 31, 2022

If a child is acting out at school should they have consequences at school and at home?

Acting out behavior is an indicator that a person or a child is making choices that are disobedient to principles, and they are showing their perception out loud through their behavior. This child or person is asking for help, yet few people see that that's what they need. Usually, a person or a child who displays acting-out behavior are punished with controlling mechanisms and rarely they are given what they actually need, which is someone who can consistently model and boundary these people inside Truth.

What would you do in this situation when you know how to reflect Truth when somebody on the other side of you

needs it?

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180: What is Love Inside Marriage? Dec 28, 2022

What is love?

The world has love and lust very confused. In fact, these two words are used synonymously- and that is not possible! This is why “loving” marriages have turmoil and hatred. How can confrontation, chaos and hurt be inside a loving relationship? Well, once you understand what love is it will start to make sense to you how that is possible…It CAN'T! So what is love? Many have spent lifetimes in pursuit of a definition.

Listen to this podcast and learn what LOVE really is and how you can strengthen your marriage.

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179: Can You Celebrate... Santa Clause in the Truth? Dec 24, 2022

How do I celebrate Santa in Truth? Can it be done?

Can you throw a surprise party for someone in Truth?

Listen to the components of how to do so in Truth and not in distortion.

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178: Intimacy Problems in Marriage Dec 21, 2022

How many of you desire to have intimacy inside your marriage? Have you ever thought your intimacy could use improvement? There are a lot of people and resources who claim to have the answer... and yet marriages are not improving. Why is that? The reason is that you are not experiencing an intimacy problem… you have a responsibility problem! Intimacy is the outcome of personal responsibility, honesty and humility. When intimacy is absent it's because somewhere in the marriage there is an absence of responsibility, honesty and humility.

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177: I've Sinned... and I Want to Change! Can I Repent? Dec 17, 2022

I've sinned and I want to change!

Do you feel like this person?

Do you want to change?

Are you willing to use your agency. to be honest, responsible and humble?

There is always time and grace for change.

Listen to what's necessary to follow through with change.

Repentance is always possible.

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176: My Christmas Gift & Yours Dec 14, 2022

Is the name Santa Claus or Saint Nicholas a name that is often heard in your home around the holidays?

I know that Saint Nicholas is an embodiment of love, charity, sacrifice, and giving.

He has a whole team who helps him put together help and kindness and looks out for the needs of others.

He embodies charity. Where does charity come from?

Charity comes from the whole reason we celebrate Christmas which is Jesus Christ.

It is Jesus Christ's name that I would like to focus this podcast around.

So gather together, grab your children and let's talk about the name and the gift that was given to us at this holiday season.

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175: What Does an Entitled 17-Year-Old Look Like? Dec 10, 2022

Do you know what patterns mean?

Do you know what patterns of behaviors mean?

Patterns of Distortion

Do you know that you are the one who enables patterns both in Truth and in distortion?

There would not be patterns of distortion if you were not enabling or allowing them.

Do you want those patterns to stop?

Are you willing to look at yourself and create patterns in Truth rather than patterns of distortion?

That is the question.

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174: Why I Need Values in My Life Dec 07, 2022

Let's talk about values. What are values? Values are what is important to you. Values are what you hold in your heart and then reflect into the world.

Maybe you value having a thousand-thread count in your sheets. Maybe you value having a body that is really athletically built and you spent time and maybe money building your body to be really great at performing in sports. Maybe you value going out and picking your own pumpkin out of your own garden that you planted with your own hands and grew from seed, and now you are going to make pumpkin pie out of it and you do that every fall with your grandchildren. Maybe that is something you value. Now Values can change over time. I know at one point in my life I really valued sitting down at the piano and practicing for an hour. That was really important to me. However, that isn't important to me anymore. I don't value that like I used to. So values can fluctuate, and values can change. Values can also be in distortion. So I could value something really distorted like: "I can hold a grudge longer than anybody else," or "I drive the fastest car in the neighborhood so that means I'm better than everybody else." I could also value something very denigrating like: "I have the ugliest feet and I spend so much time looking at my feet thinking that they are so ugly, they are so big, they don't fit with the rest of my body and so I value beating myself up." A lot of people today value beating themselves up, It's really sad.

If you value principles of Truth, now you are getting into character. This is where character is built. When you take your own personal values and project them onto principles of Truth. So it would sound like this: "I value being honest," "I value being responsible," "I value being kind to people around me," "I value forgiving," "I value being humble and looking at myself and asking 'Are there things in my life I need to change?'" Character is built when principles of Truth become a person's values. That is so important! If you want to be a person of high moral character, then you MUST, you must value principles of Truth.

So today we are going to talk all about a woman who does not have values in her life. Now, this is a scary place to be and here's why it's scary to not have values. Values offer direction. Values give a left or a right, they give a calibration as to "You are really really hot here" or "You are really really cold here." So it gives you a place to measure yourself. Now without a standard of measurement, it is really hard to know if you are off if you don't even know what side you are facing or if you don't even know what direction you are standing. Having a value says "Ooh ooh, you need to make some adjustments here" which is good! It's wonderful to get feedback from yourself so you can go "Okay, I do feel off. I'm going to go back and I'm going to change that" or "I'm going to go back and I'm going to repent" or "I'm going to go back and make some adjustments." When you don't have values, you don't know when you are off and what you end up doing is reverting to other people around you to tell you what to do. That is what is going on with this woman who writes us today. She has no values and so she is susceptible to being manipulated by her children and by others around her.

If you want to be solid and don't want to be manipulated. You have to have values. I would also encourage you to make sure those values are based in principles of honesty, responsibility and humility.

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173: Is There Ever a Time to CONTROL Your Loved One? Dec 03, 2022

My sister is making destructive, distorted and distracting choices and I want to stop her.

How do I help her? How do I control what is happening? What is my responsibility?

"This is difficult!" Does this sound familiar? That someone is doing something and you want them to STOP!

Listen to the podcast and learn what is your responsibility and what is not your responsibility.

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172: The TRUTH Beneath the Denigrating Doormat Nov 30, 2022

I'm sure you have all heard of the term "Doormat". This is someone who allows and permits others to treat them badly to walk all over them. This person does not stand up for themselves and just goes along with the choices and abuses of people around them.

The doormat is actually a person who has double standards. A person who is dishonest, so you can have an opinion but I can't. Others can have preferences and wants but mine are obsolete. I need to watch my tone of voice but others can yell and shriek. The person who's being the doormat (and maybe that's you) is perpetuating a lie, the lie that someone needs to be the martyr in order for there to be order. Someone needs to take the blame, somebody needs to take the fall and somebody needs to take the higher road in order for everyone to get along. That is a lie.

The Truth is, if there is going to be an environment of mutual trust and respect, then every individual needs to be honest, every individual needs to show up responsible and humble. Nobody is shouldering the blame, no one is shouldering the abuse or covering for someone else, dropping empathy, compassion and awareness.

When the doormat finally stands up and begins taking responsibility and begins to expect others to also take responsibility. It may look like all of a sudden there is dust and dirt and a huge mess being made all over the floor. But the Truth is, that dust and dirt and mess has always been there, you (the doormat) were covering it up. The doormat is the ultimate controller. The doormat keeps everyone else's selfishness a secret. That's why people like using a doormat, that's why people like using you because you are so willing to hide their distortions.

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171: Should I Keep This Relationship? Nov 26, 2022

What does the word "Relationship" mean?

What are the characteristics of one?

Once you understand the word and the meaning of relationships and you practice living and behaving principles of Truth,

you will see and know very clearly what you would like to choose and how you will choose to behave inside of one.

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170: What Lengths Would You Go to Protect Your Child? Nov 26, 2022

What length would you go to, to keep your child protected?

I've heard many parents say, "I would give my life for my child,"

"I would throw myself in front of a bus if I knew it would save the life of my child,"

"I would take a bullet for them."

All of these axioms are referring to the physical "I'll put my life on the altar if it will help my child."

How many of you are willing to confront another loved one if it keeps your child safe?

I know of a woman who knew that her brother was hugging her daughters to the point they felt it was uncomfortable, too close, too much and his hands were moving around too much. Her own daughters came to her saying it was uncomfortable, nasty and creepy when their uncle came to town and gave them hugs.

Would you go to that for these girls?

Would you put a boundary down and say "You know what, no more visiting this brother of mine"?

Would you also put a boundary down with the brother and say "You can't come to our house anymore and you're not going to be hugging my girls anymore"?

How many of you would be willing to confront and be uncomfortable in order to keep your child emotionally and spiritually safe?

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169: Waking Up…to Our Murderous Hearts (ROE OVERTURNED) Nov 26, 2022

Where do you stand on the issue of abortion?

Do you see abortion as killing a child or do you call it ridding one's body of cell tissue?

The Truth is, abortion is and always will be the slaughter of innocent life. Period. The end.

Where do you stand? Are you desiring to live in Truth?

Come and listen to the reality of what abortion is and how abortion affects those involved.

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168: In the Trenches of Motherhood Nov 26, 2022

I'm the mother of six children, I have been in the trenches for twenty years and I am just beginning to peek my head up and I can see the dust is beginning to settle.

I'm starting to see the sun for the first time and my energy is beginning to be restored to me.

I'm a personal witness to you that the work and great sacrifice involved with nurturing and raising children is very much worth it.

So when I was in the middle of having lots of littles and none of them were tying their shoes and most of them were in diapers. I wrote my own obituary.

"Ruby Franke, cause of death unknown, detectives searched for clues amid piles of dress-ups, picture books, bath toys and an astonishing number of legos and empty Oreo packages.

Medical personnel speculate toxic diaper fumes or suffocation by laundry, others believe her wallet grew so tight it literally strangled her. She has survived by her husband Kevin, who is himself, barely keeping his head above water. Warning to readers, ambushes of children may be dangerous to your health."

Now I share this writing with the motive to relate to other mothers who are also in the trenches. A spoon-full of humor can help the reality go down. I want to be clear, I want to point out how much "victim" I was in when I wrote this piece of satire. I was feeling sorry for myself and I felt that I was the target of half-a-dozen hoodlums. The Truth is, the rewards of motherhood are directly correlated to the amount of sacrifice required.

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167: Protecting Children from the Dangers of Technology Nov 26, 2022

Technology is a reality in today's world. It provides an amazing opportunity for us to use our agency and live in Truth as we govern technology.

If each of us doesn't know how to manage ourselves in Truth, the technology will be misused and people will go into distortion. Come learn how to manage yourself, your children and the technology.

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166: Gone Are the Days of Family Movies Nov 26, 2022

When was the last time you took your family, your children or grandchildren to the movie theater and enjoyed a family movie where there wasn't encoded, encrypted, subliminal messaging in the background?

It used to be that movies encouraged children to be obedient to parents and now movies are encouraging children to break free from so-called restrictive family beliefs, family practices or family traditions, where parents could once rely on movies as a source of fun, entertainment, a sense of humor, a real break from life.

We can now count on movies to put a wedge, to insert entitlement, to promote attitudes of restriction and resentment for boundaries.

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165: My Opinion Does Not Constitute the Truth Nov 26, 2022

I hear this statement quite often. People will say, "Well that's just my opinion" and I will say, "Yes, that is your opinion. That is what you consider to be true. Truth is not about opinions. Truth is about facts."

So are opinions wrong to have?

How do opinions differ from Truth?

I want to be a distinct individual with opinions and live in Truth.

How do I do that?

Listen to the podcast and I'm going to explain how.

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164: Do You REALLY Know What is Coming into Your Home? Nov 26, 2022

How many of you parents are tuned in and really aware of what's in your home?

What magazines are on your shelf?

What books are your children reading?

What are they watching on TV?

Who are they interacting with?

These are important questions because parents are responsible for what comes into their home.

I know when my children were growing up some of the book series I allowed in my home were for selfish reasons. "Because it helped the kids to read" I would justify...or "It keeps my children entertained and they are funny. What could it hurt?" Books like: Junie B. Jones, Captain Underwear, Diary of a Whimpy Kid and Charlie's Bumpers. There were many series that seemed harmless on the outside, however years down the road I could not complain when I started to see disconnect, and my child speaking exactly as the characters in the books that I was providing for them.

So these are really great questions to think about as we go into discussing this mother's regret in what she let into her home.

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163: Learn how IMAGINATION can be in Truth or distortion Nov 26, 2022

What is the difference between choosing distortion and having an imagination?

This is confusing for many people.

Come and listen to the distinctions between the two and how you can stay aware and awake to both.

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162: Worship of Children, the Modern Golden Calf Nov 26, 2022

I hope that you will hear me out as I unveil a real nasty, ugly unspoken ill that is taking place right under our noses.

Now, this is so commonplace and so culturally acceptable that you are going to be tempted to write this off.

I encourage you to be open, to be humble, and to be curious because what I have to share with you is the answer that you have been looking for. This may be what you have been praying for on behalf of your child.

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161: Can I CHOOSE to Break Commandments, Violate Spiritual Laws, Engage in Sexual Deviancy and STILL CALL MYSELF A CHRISTIAN? Nov 26, 2022

Can I choose to violate God's commandments and identify as a Christian?

Can I live in Truth and do whatever I want?

Why do I need to do or behave the way God asks for me to behave in order to say that I love him?

Do I understand what love means?

This woman is living in a significant compartmentalized state and she appears unaware of it.

Listen to the feedback I give to her and the invitation for her to change and be congruent.

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160: Overcoming Anger Nov 26, 2022

Where does anger come from?

Do you know someone who is angry constantly? Maybe it's you.

How is anger created? What is it?

Anger is coming from a base of dishonesty, irresponsibility, and pride.

Somewhere with the person who is angry, somewhere in their life, they are choosing irresponsibility, dishonesty and pride or a lacking of willing to be humble.

Anger comes from living in a place of victim where: "I'm not responsible for the things going on around me," "Life should be easier," "Life should be better to me," and "I don't deserve any of this." So they are not willing to be vulnerable and they live in a state of drama where they are blaming things, circumstances, places and especially people.

We know this because anger on the other end is peace, is calm, is connection.

Where does that come from? How can I build a life of peace and calm? I want to feel connected. Well, the only way you can have that is if you're living a base of being Honest, Responsible and Humble. It means: "I surrender" and "I understand and I accept that I live in a world where 'bad things happen' and live in a world where I am uncomfortable and there is pain and there's sabotage going on" and it's a willingness to roll with the punches. That's where peace comes from.

So if you want to get out of anger, if you want to learn to overcome these irritable feelings...keep listening.

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159: Who's Entitled to the Grandchildren? Nov 26, 2022

Do grandparents have a right to spend time with their grandchildren?

How can my children have a relationship with their grandparents and not be influenced by their grandparent's distortion?

Listen to how you can listen to principles of Honesty, Responsibility and Humility and use those in any experience, any situation and never drop your responsibility or negotiate your character.

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158: Feeling Accepted is MY Responsibility Nov 26, 2022

We all have expectations in this life.

Expectations are part of the human experience,

it's what sets us apart from the animals.

Each of us has agency and we get to decide what our expectations are going to be.

So who is responsible for meeting my expectations?

Is my spouse responsible for meeting my expectations?

Is it my child? Does it depend on the circumstance?

Maybe in some circumstances my neighbor is responsible

for meeting my expectations, or maybe the mailman?

I know I like my packages to come by a certain time.

Is it that my mailman's responsibility to make sure that my packages come to me when I want them?

When you decide that you are willing and ready to make the leap into living in Truth, which is just another way of saying you're ready to make a leap of faith. You take the responsibility of meeting your own expectations.

One expectation many people expect in this life is the desire to feel complete, to feel stable and secure. Doesn't everyone want to feel whole, satisfied, loved and accepted?

How do I fulfill my own expectation of feeling

whole, loved and accepted? Without relying on someone else to give that to me.

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157: What Do You Do When an 18-Year-Old Is UNWILLING to...Adult? Nov 26, 2022

How do I influence and invite an 18-year-old person to be Responsible, Honest and Humble when they don't want to be?

How can I practice surrender and not let the choices of my 18-year-old sister invite me into her distortion?

This is difficult to do and itCAN be done.

Listen to how it is done by learning how to let go with love and surrender your loved ones.

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156: Interfaith Marriage: How to Create Strength Nov 26, 2022

Interfaith Marriage: where each spouse devotes his or her life to a different religion, can be the source of a lot of

mixed emotions and often leads to drama.

These couples commonly run into problems of disapproval, criticism, blame, competition, and loneliness.

These emotions often rise to a boiling level when the denominations of the child comes on stage, often years

down the road.

Can couples with different religions make their marriage work?

Can love be expressed amongst each family member, regardless of religion?

Is it possible to remain religiously devoted at the same time being dedicated to principles?

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155: Is There Lust in Your Marriage? Nov 26, 2022

Are you or your spouse acting out in lust?

Whether you are in a marriage or not is lust in your life?

Do you know what lust is?

Are you willing to learn?

Lust is a choice in distortion not Truth.

Are you willing to use your choices to choose the Truth and rid lust from your life?

If you are keep listening.

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154: The Disintegration of Society Nov 26, 2022

154: The Disintegration of Society

Disintegration is a word you're probably familiar with.

We've all heard the term "The disintegration of the family."

Well, what does disintegration actually mean?

Disintegration is the process of losing cohesion and strength. Cohesion is the combination of similar particles into one great whole.

So disintegration is quite literally the falling apart, the coming apart of similar particles of people with similar standards and principles.

"Dis" means "to lack". So you've heard of dishonesty; Dis-honesty means to lack honesty.

You've heard the phrase "Don't 'Dis' on me,"

I know that was popular when I was growing up

"Hey don't 'dis' on me."

Well, dis-integration means to lack integration,

to quite literally lack being a part of a unified whole.

So dis-integration (because it's a process) is going to start first with self; it is when I drop responsibility to

myself and to God. And then the disintegration then goes to family, and when the family begins to disintegrate you see it economically,

and then when it disintegrates economically, you start to see politics disintegrate.

This is happening right before our very eyes and then it goes to social and cultural and that's where we're at today.

We are literally seeing the disintegration of our society.

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153: Children & Obedience...Is It That Important? Nov 26, 2022

Listen to how this mother is unaware, not cued into her son's agency.

She believes one thing about her son and she finds out a very different thing about him.

She is shocked to find out that her son is very disobedient, very dishonest and incredibly irresponsible.

She then becomes scared that she has lost him.

Will this Mom or will you do what is necessary to "Get your child back?"

Will you teach them and hold their choices accountable so they can experience outcomes in reality, outcomes in Truth?

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152: The Principle of Suffering and Roe V Wade Nov 26, 2022

Rode Verses Wade was a landmark decision made by the U.S. supreme court in 1973. The high court of the land ruled that the constitution of the United States gave the right to have an abortion, according to the 14th amendment.

The right to privacy was interpreted to mean that the government could not interfere with the woman's desire to end a pregnancy. Now you all know on June 24, 2022 America overturned the decision made in 1973 and now leaves the abortion decision up to the individual states.

Of course, when one lives in Truth that person is not rocked back and forth by the decision of the high court of the U.S.A., that person is grounded solid in the high court of principles of God. Life is given and granted by God. It is through the bodies he has provided us that we are able to create lives through the principle of pregnancy. It is thereby congruent and honest to look to God for our attitudes around pregnancy, life and the unborn.

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151: I'm a Teen and... I Deserve a Phone?? Nov 26, 2022

Why are so many kids of the mindset that they need or that they deserve a phone?

Most of us lived in a world where phones were not a permanent fixture on our bodies; and we would have never handed over a phone to our child.

Yet today, kids have been conditioned to be demanding and they act entitled about having a phone. More parents are insistent on giving them one, whether out of convenience for the parents or out of trying to make the child happy.

What exactly is happening?

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150: Faith is Not Magical Thinking Nov 26, 2022

I think every parent has this experience where they watch their child play in imagination and they get a smile across their face.

I know the first time I saw my son secure a towel to his back and ran around the house and jumped off the ottoman, and I remember a smile curving up on my lips and I was trying to hide it as my daughter was wearing high heels pretending she was a mother pushing a little stroller pretending and imagining she was a mother herself.

I remember watching with delight as my oldest made cookies in the kitchen and pretended she was on the Rachael Ray Show.

Children just have this really beautiful gift during childhood and that is the magical place of imagination.

What a beautiful and engaging resource! It really is a resource that children tap into that allows them to develop cognitively, socially, emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually.

Imagination helps them to mature. Imagination is a necessary component in learning about oneself.

Now as children grow if they are nurtured in Truth, which means they are taught about Honesty, Responsibility, and Humility. Then they will learn where their responsibilities lie. They can use that developed imagination to assist them in fulfilling those responsibilities. They will learn to utilize imagination to foster creativity and resourcefulness, so in other words, their imaginations become an asset to them.

On the other hand, if a child grows, - and you may be one of these children - and is not nurtured in Truth, they don't learn about Honesty, they don't learn to be Responsible and they are not Humble. Then they will not learn where their responsibilities lie. So this adult - who is a child in this grown body - will use magical thinking to hide their irresponsible behavior. This magical thinking becomes an accomplice in the destruction of a human soul.

So magical thinking is a pattern of thought that does not include personal responsibility. Let me give you an example, it would be like deciding you would like to get a promotion simply because you want a promotion and then demonstrating a pattern of coming to work late. Magical thinking would include setting a goal to lose twenty pounds and then never exercising and maintaining the same high caloric diet. Magical thinking denies personal responsibility.

As I lay out magical thinking in this podcast, be thinking about examples in your own life where you are magically thinking a solution will just up and land in your lap.

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149: How I Learned About Truth & Distortion Nov 26, 2022

Listen to the story of how I learned about Truth and distortion.

I was hurting and I was confused and desperate for answers.

I was taught by Heaven what Truth is, and also what distortion is.

I am excited to share my journeys with you.

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148: Stop Relaxing and Get Some Rest Nov 26, 2022

Do you relate to any of these emotions?

Feeling a sense of failure, stress, self-doubt, feeling caged or stuck?

Maybe feeling a lack of satisfaction in your work?

Can you relate to any of these physical symptoms?

Feeling drained, exhausted, tightness in the chest or back, maybe your legs ache and your feet swell.

Do you experience headaches or constant upset stomach?

These feelings are common and they are often accompanied with a desire to disconnect, a desire to relax.

What if I told you that the very outcome you are seeking could actually be inflaming burnout?

This could come as a complete shock when I say this but, you do not need to relax, what you actually need is to rest.

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147: Hitting Children Creates Fear Nov 26, 2022

Learn how to change fear into empathy/compassion.

Children typically will respond when they are frightened.

Yet, that teaches them to respond because they are motivated by fear to do so.

Follow along with me and see how to invite a child to respond from fear/distortion into empathy/Truth.

Children have choices, they have agency, and invite them into a more likely way to be obedient.

Either way they choose, they still will have outcomes and still will have boundaries.

So come and learn the language of a loving invitation.

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146: Divorce Nov 26, 2022

Am I selfish for wanting a divorce?

Well, ask yourself this question…

Am I wanting a divorce from my spouse because he or she is not following through and keeping their commitment to God, self, and spouse?

Or am I wanting a divorce because my spouse isn’t

giving me something I want or something I should be

providing for myself?

In order to answer this question. I need to know what

exactly a husband and wife are committing to when

entering into a commitment.

What is a wife in Truth, entitled to from her husband?

What is a husband in Truth, entitled to from his wife?

Truth entitlements include Honesty, emotional honesty, commitment to honoring God and His commandments, complete fidelity in mind, heart, and body, responsibility, gentleness, meekness, humility, a willingness to counsel together, a cheerful attitude towards working and laboring side-by-side, protection emotionally, physically, and spiritually, last but not least, love unfeigned to love the other without guile, to love without pretense,

or passive aggression.

Now that we have covered a few of the Truthful entitlements of a spouse, what is a spouse not entitled to

from the other?

Let's name a few: sex, money, land, property, education, insurance, happiness, date nights, vacations, holiday observations, holiday traditions, mother’s day, father's day, Valentines day, an unchecked honey to-do list, romance, candle-lit dinners, anniversary surprises, gifts, jewelry,

a man cave, golfing, a girls weekend, guys trips,

new furniture, I could go on and on, romantic bike rides, Christmas at the wife’s home, Thanksgiving at the husband’s house, you get the picture.

A married spouse is entitled to commitment to principles of Truth. They are not entitled to commitment to the cultural traditions, and expectations.

So, if marriage is a principle of Truth, endorsed and endowed from God on high, then what is divorce?

When is divorce ever in Truth?

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145: Does God "LET" Bad Things Happen? Nov 26, 2022

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144: Is Your Child A Consumer or Creator? Nov 26, 2022

Is it distorted to get mad over messes?

Are you in a pattern of parenting using punishment?

Is your child in a pattern of consuming instead of creating?

Then this is the podcast for you.

Indulgence, avoidance, helpless/hopeless, apathy, entitlement, and running away from responsibility, are all signs that your motivation is off. Let’s take a dive into this mom’s desperate plea for help.

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143: Why Are Our Children Lusting? Nov 26, 2022

A mother and a father are in conflict with their teenage daughter who is masquerading as loving and caring.

Listen to how the daughter threatens her parents to give her birth control or else.

Are you a parent willing to hold the line with your child?

Are you willing to reflect boundaries that are Truthful to your children?

Do you know what principles are?

Are you willing to learn?

Are you willing to let your children go and make their decisions and allow them the outcomes as a way to invite them to be humble?

Which kind of parent are you?

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142: Principle of Marriage Nov 26, 2022

142: Principle of Marriage

How well do you understand marriage?

It makes sense why there is so much confusion around this topic because there is so much confusion around agency and responsibility.

I'm going to break down the exact definition of what marriage is, as well as what marriage is not.

Then we will look at why marriage has become so confusing.

Marriage is a principle that comes directly from God. There is no substitute to this commitment.

Living together and co-habitation are counterfeits to true and lasting love.

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141: Is Your Posterity Punishing You Because You Told Them NO? Nov 26, 2022

This podcast is an invitation to protect your children, your grandchildren, and even your great-grandchildren.

Are you someone that wants to make your kids, your grandkids, or great-grandkids "Happy?"

Are you afraid that your kids, your grandkids, or your great-grandkids will punish you if you do not do what they want?

Come learn what love truly is, how to share, how to model, and how to invite your kids, your grandkids, and your great-grandkids into a real and loving relating-ship.

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140: Raising Children in Truth in Any Neighborhood Nov 26, 2022

Is it possible to raise a child in Truth while living in the hood?

Can a child learn to be Honest, Responsible, and Humble even if they live in the slums?

Is it even possible to raise a child in Truth anywhere these days?

What is a parent to do when they want to raise their child in Truth, but they are full of fear? Can this be just as harmful as being on the streets?

What does a parent do when their biggest fears around their child begin to become reality?

Is it ever okay to lash out at a child?

Is a knee-jerk reaction ever justified?

Is it the child or is it the parent who needs to shift?

Today we are going to talk about Truth and distortion while raising your children in an environment that is dangerous.

I know many of you have parenting dreams that have turned into parenting nightmares.

You are not going to want to miss this episode.

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139: Can My Daughter Miss Church in Truth Nov 26, 2022

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138: When Fathers Leave Nov 26, 2022

A fathers presence in the home is supposed to provide safety, support, protection, providence and guidance. A child is entitled to have both father and mother in the home offering a nurturing and warm and connected environment.

So what is a mother to do when the father leaves?

What is the mother’s responsibility in this situation?

Is she to intervene? Is she to move on? How can she do this while living in Truth?

Today’s episode touches on this very tender topic.

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137: Gender Just Is Nov 26, 2022

The confusion we create around gender!

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136: Privacy is Not a Principle Nov 26, 2022

I’m going to read to you six phrases that are often heard in homes across the world, where teens are getting into drama with their parents.

Have you ever heard this?

“You’re invading my space,”

“Those are personal,”

“I need more privacy,”

“You are just prying into my life,”

“You’re so controlling,”

“You don’t respect my space.”

I’m sure one of those phrases has been said in your own home.

Is there any Truth inside these requests?

That is exactly what we’re going to be talking about today.

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135: Are Chemicals in Your Body...Okay? Nov 26, 2022

Can you use caffeine in Truth?

Can you use caffeine in distortion?

How does caffeine or any other substance, liquid, or material affect your body?

You are responsible for your body, and you're responsible to watch your motives as to why you do what you do with your body.

Listen to the upcoming podcast and you decide how you use substances such as caffeine in your body.

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134: Standing Alone in Truth Nov 26, 2022

134: Standing Alone in Truth

Standing for Truth is becoming more and more uncomfortable.

Why is that?

Distortion makes Truth the target for attack, and we are living in a world that normalizes distortion.

Distortion aims to isolate Truth and suffocate it. In today's words...cancel it!

Well, Truth cannot be canceled. Distortion will project its hate onto anyone who lives in Truth.

You are framed as the hateful one, you are seen as the duck among the swans and you become persecuted and harassed...and it's not you!

The Truth is, distortion is all about disconnecting, isolating, and setting others up to be humiliated.

Truth stands alone, Truth is valiant, and Truth doesn't bend, distort or waver.

Truth is who you want to align with. Because the Truth will always stand.

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133: Am I Too Old to Learn About Truth/God? Nov 26, 2022

Am I too old to learn of God?

I want my children to be happy, yet I'm not sure what to do.

It takes a very mature person to "look for God and look for Truth."

Principles are your base, and creating that base will bring into your life:

connection, clarity, peace/Truth/God.

These characteristics can only be experienced by a person who is willing/humble

to choose principles of Truth.

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132: Generational Distortion Nov 26, 2022

Come along with me as you follow a young woman describe her destructive choices to act out.

And then she realizes that she had the power all the way along to heal herself.

Listen to how she takes responsibility for her distorted perceptions, her distorted feelings, and her distorted behaviors, and refuses to pass along generational distortion to her children.

This empowering story and outcomes are available for everyone who's willing to humble.

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131: Allowance is NOT a Principle Nov 26, 2022

Allowance...

Has this been a topic of debate in your home?

If parents are responsible for teaching children how to manage money,

then wouldn’t giving them an allowance be a good thing?

What are the principles that lay the foundation of earning money?

Is it possible for my child to earn money and still be in distortion?

If so, what would that look like?

Today we’re discussing hard work, sacrifice, resistance, grit, needs and money,

and where you the parent have responsibilities and where your child has responsibilities.

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130: Truthful Touch Nov 26, 2022

Every choice that you and I make is either in Truth or in distortion. Therefore every choice that we make has outcomes in Truth or in distortion.

Every choice has underpinnings of motives to love or to manipulate. So by virtue of this principle, every touch you engage in is also either in Truth or distortion.

How many of you have thought about your touch?

What if you could physically see with your own eyes, the markings that you’re leaving behind?

What would you see?

Distorted touch has destructive consequences for you and for the touched and alternatively, Truthful touch leaves a healing balm with you and the touched.

This is a very serious and important podcast where I lay out the principles of touch.

These principles need to be understood by every single person. Because every single one of us has a physical body.

Please stay humble as you listen. It is not uncommon for someone to sadly, wake up and realize they have never been the recipient of Truthful touch. This is why this message is so critical.

We cannot heal the world while we are walking around distortedly touching each other.

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129: Teaching Children About Truth vs. Distortion Nov 26, 2022

Children are sponges, they are watching and listening constantly, and they will repeat what they perceive.

So how do I give them and how do I teach them language and behavior that is in the Truth?

What skills do I need to acquire to be proficient in modeling principles of Truth?

Can I learn and how much am I willing to sacrifice to do so?

Is It that big of a deal?

You decide.

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128: Understanding Agency & My Body Nov 26, 2022

Can you treat depression and anxiety using medication and still be living in Truth?

If medication isn’t a principle of Truth then, what is it?

What types of filters can I sift my questions through, in order to be centered when deciding which direction to to go in managing my depression and anxiety?

With so many living in a state of panic, these are very pertinent and important probing questions.

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127: LIES YOU BELIEVE About Abortion Nov 26, 2022

Why are so many people advocating for abortions?

What is the Truth about abortion?

Why do people focus on the reasoning for abortion,

instead of on the Truth of what they are actually choosing?

Why do people who are pro-abortion become violent

when they are presented with another perspective?

Come and listen and hear another angle.

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126: Rings of Responsibility Nov 26, 2022

Have you gone the rounds trying to wrangle in your child?

Do you ever feel lost in all your littles?

Perhaps you'll relate to the feeling of being tensed up behind your teen who is on the road to rebellion.

Well, let me reassure you that you are not alone!

You are NOT dealing with a discipline problem either.

You have a responsibility problem.

Go grab a sheet of paper and a pen and get ready to write down the rings of responsibility.

This podcast will blow your mind!

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125: How Do I Not Choose Distortion? Nov 26, 2022

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124: Is Modesty a Principle of Truth? Nov 26, 2022

Do you have clothing conflicts and dressing debates going on in your home?

What is modest?

Who decides?

Is modesty subjective and to each their own?

Is it based on opinion, or is modesty a principle and virtue that is governed by Truth?

Invite your children, grandchildren, nieces, and nephews for this episode.

You’re going to have a lot to talk about. Remember, stay open and curious, as we look for

Principles inside this controversial and difficult topic. It is going to take some real boldness to break away from this distortion.

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123: Comforting HUMILIATED Daughter Nov 26, 2022

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122: Santa DIDN'T Come Nov 26, 2022

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121: Separation...A Principle of Truth Nov 26, 2022

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120: FEAR...IT'S NOT PERSONAL Nov 26, 2022

FEAR...IT'S NOT PERSONAL

FEAR...It's captivating!

All of us experience it to a greater or lesser degree.

Jodi explains in great detail the origins, the why's, the rationale, and the way to extricate FEAR from your life.

Take the courageous journey into yourself, be willing to humble and become curious to follow the circuitous path to identify your FEARS, your false beliefs and annihilate them with the sword of Truth!

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119: Worth = Worthy? Nov 26, 2022

Worth = Worthy?

Jodi describes the interplay between Worth and Worthy.

Your worth is fixed. So how can you feel or BE unworthy . . .? You can't . . . however, distortion lies to you and tells you . . . you ARE unworthy!

It's RIGHT HERE where you get to choose whether you will stay in Truth and speak clearly of your worth that you chose wrongly, poorly and your choice was unworthy of you and what you stand for OR if you'll choose distortion and falsely believe your choices MAKE you less worthy and follow those lies. It's your choice!

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118: ME, MY AND I . . . YOUR GREATEST ENEMY OR ALLY? Nov 26, 2022

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117: Relationships vs. Dynamics Nov 26, 2022

RELATIONSHIPS VS. DYNAMICS

Relating-ships . . . take much emotional concentrated effort.

Dynamics take no emotional effort at all.

All of your interactions are either engaging a Relating-ship or in a Dynamic.

If you want closeness and connection = RELATING-SHIP then

listen to how Jodi describes the necessary choices and outcomes in creating one.

Warmly,

- The ConneXions Team

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116: Life is hard . . . hard is necessary Nov 26, 2022

Life is to be learned from. All of us experience HARD and PAIN in life. And inside HARD and PAIN is the opportunity for growth. We are responsible to choose in Truth and be centered.

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115: Enabling (Controlling) vs. Surrender Nov 26, 2022

Enabling (controlling) vs. Surrender

What does it mean to enable?

Enabling means to control. What does control mean?

Listen to Jodi's podcast to learn how to recognize, hear and understand; why you control, with whom you control, & how to make choices to not control – but surrender. Surrender is the antidote of control.

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114: Safety Equals Trust Nov 26, 2022

Safety = Trust

Jody shared the "absolutes" of a REAL relationship which involves Honesty, Responsibility and Humility.

Honesty, Responsibility and Humility which creates safety which creates consistent safety which creates Trust.

Trust CANNOT be an outcome unless you choose Truth. Learn how to choose Truth so you can be a Trustworthy being!

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113: Invalidation Nov 26, 2022

How often do you invalidate? Do you even know what invalidation is?

Invalidation is the quickest way to disconnect from yourself and others.

If you want to understand how to connect or how to disconnect

- you need to listen and take notes during this podcast! - Enjoy our podcast!

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112: . . . AND THAT MEANS . . . DISTORTIONS! Nov 26, 2022

This is the podcast that explains it all. This podcast illuminates and "zeros in" on distortion and explains to you EXACTLY how it speaks to you and what you do next when you hear it in your head or coming out of the mouths of those people you love. You must first hear distortion. . . which says things like, "You're less than. . ." or "You're better than. . ." and after distortion speaks to you, it will then say, ". . .AND THAT MEANS. . . something horrible, derogatory, aggressive, mean and personal about you! For example, You hear distortion say, "You are not qualified, you will never get the job!" and then distortion says, "and that means. . . you are stupid." "And that means. . . you'll make a fool of yourself if you try." "And that means, . . ."you will never be enough." LIES!! LIES!! LIES!! Distortion lies and scares you into believing lies.

This podcast teaches you to hear the lies and how to reframe the lies into Truth. This is a must listen!!

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111: What is Love...? Nov 26, 2022

What Is Love?

Every time I hear, "I just need to love them." or "You just need to love me." or "I'm not going to judge them, I'm just going to love them." I feel confused and I ask myself this question. "What does THAT mean?" What is the motive behind you're supposed loving response and what exactly does love mean?

Jodi starts at the beginning and deconstructs the word love and explains the personal responsibility behind the word. She talks about how we are each perceiving first before we experience the feeling of love.

This is a podcast you're going to want to listen to again and again to learn the "how to's" of love beginning with yourself. Enjoy!

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110: Boundaries - Evidence of Self Care Nov 26, 2022

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109: Commitment - Your Responsibility Nov 26, 2022

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108: The Greatest Disconnection - Lust Nov 26, 2022

Connection or Disconnection... That is the Quest.

Connection is governed by particular principles that I choose to engage in, to manifest/activate it's glorious outcome, peace, joy, satisfaction - Truth!

Connection's deceptive counterpart - disconnection invites me into destructive behaviors, and thought patterns - one of the most obvious thoughts/actions of disconnection - Selfishness = Lust

Listen to how Lust, selfishness & disconnect destroys oneself, relationships & the possibility of ever connecting!

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107: Singular Pronouns = Consciousness Nov 26, 2022

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106: Manipulation Of The Truth Nov 26, 2022

We all are involved in relationships AND how many of your relationships are in Truth

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105: Not "Enough-ness" Nov 26, 2022

Feeling sad, lonely, upset, and all other uncomfortable emotions are a part of life and is God-given. What is satanic, is this feeling of being "not enough". Jodi Hildebrandt explores the deep, underlying feeling of shame and distortion and uncovers its myth.

Learn how you can feel "enough", loved, and wanted. Hint: you don't need others to change...only yourself.

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104: Tracking My Choices–14 Steps to Healing Pain Nov 26, 2022

How are you tracking your choices? What does that even mean?

Learn from Jodi Hildebrandt how your choices are directly and indirectly affecting you and everyone around you. There is hope and you can heal ALL pain. Sit down, grab some food, and take notes because you are going to learn the secret to healing yourself.

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103: Victim–Entitled Irresponsibility Nov 26, 2022

Victim is the #1 cause of unhappiness in the world. If this is true, wouldn't you want to know more about it?

Here are the two ways victim is played out:

Self-Denigration

• I don’t matter

• It’s my fault

• It’s not fair

• I’m unworthy

• I’m bad

• I don’t deserve

• I’m unlovable

• I’m not enough

• My needs are not as important as…

• I’m stupid, dumb, an idiot, etc.

• I’m ugly and undesirable

• I’m responsible to/for . . .

Self-Adulation

• I’m different / better than

• I’m the exception

• It’s not my fault

• I’m right . . . you’re wrong

• You did this to me

• Because of you…

• I’m special/unique

• I shouldn’t have to…

• I am entitled to do whatever I want

• I don’t affect other people— only myself

• My needs are the most important thing

• I can do what I want.

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102: The Two Greatest Weapons for Spiritual & Emotional Warfare Nov 26, 2022

Distortion and Truth are at war with each other. We may choose to stay ignorant to this fact, however, the less conscious we are, the more distortion can and will ravage our lives, families, and souls. The Truth shall make you free. Listen to this life-changing podcast by Jodi Hildebrandt to understand how to use our two greatest weapons of protection and self-defense: choice and responsibility.

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101: Betrayal–It's Not What You Think Nov 26, 2022

Jodi talks about the controversial topic of betrayal. The general concept of betrayal is one of victim. The mentality of someone having the ability to spiritually hurt me is false. Yes, we all affect one another AND the Truth is that I choose how I think, feel, and behave.

No matter how much someone physically harms me, verbally assaults me, or breaks even the most sacred of promises I am 100% responsible for how I respond through my thoughts, feelings, and actions. Learn more by listening to this thorough podcast on the subject.

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100: Controlling Fear Nov 26, 2022

Most people confuse control with only those who control nations, big corporations, and armies as being controlling. The reality is that all of us can and are controlling. Control is the opposite of freedom. And freedom allows us to connect. Control is the manifestation of disconnection.

Control is an illusion and a distortion. In Reality, we are not in control of much in our lives. We cannot control our health, our life/death, even our own heartbeat. And we certainly cannot control anything outside of ourselves, such as our environment, other people, circumstances, events and outcomes.

Surrender is being willing to acknowledge and accept the Reality: the outcomes of life that are presented to me, as well as the outcomes of my own choices. Surrendering means letting go of (not controlling or avoiding) my expectations, wants, desired outcomes, discomforts, pain, resentments, limitations, traumas, etc.

Jodi gives personal experiences of how she has controlled and surrendered during her life. She truly cares for those who struggle with control and knows that there is a way out.

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99: Power of Truth Nov 26, 2022

There is a strong power that comes with Truth. When we think Truth, feel Truth, speak Truth, and behave in Truth, there is a strength that accompanies it. Jodi speaks of how we need Truth to change. Personal change does not simply occur, it is chosen. As we choose Truth we simultaneously choose to better ourselves through honesty, responsibility, and humility.

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98: Compassion & Gratitude Nov 26, 2022

Learn how to have compassion and gratitude in your life. Living these principles of Truth will improve your quality of life drastically. I invite you to learn more by listening to more of our podcasts and signing up for our 101 class.

101 Class link:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/101.html

Search our website for more information:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/podcast-topics.html

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97: Parenting–Understanding Drama in Children Nov 26, 2022

Parenting is extremely important in our society and in our personal lives. If we do not understand how drama is working in our children they will grow up living in distortion and it will manifest as drama. We are all used to drama in movies, social media, and in every day conversations. Well, all drama is is an outward expression of how we feel about ourselves on the inside–confused, in conflict, shameful, fearful, and hurt.

Distortion starts when children are very young. The best gift we can give them is the gift of connection which start with finding the Truth that says: "I am worthy, good, and nothing can change my eternal worth." Imagine a world full of children full of Truth. Imagine your family being full of Truth!

Start today.

Learn more on our website:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/

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96: Change–Our Greatest Victory Nov 26, 2022

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95: Surrender the Control Nov 26, 2022

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94: Vulnerability in Each Experience Nov 26, 2022

We are all vulnerable in life. The sooner we realize and accept that Truth the sooner we will be at peace. Peace requires increased skill not changed circumstances. We can learn to have vulnerability in each experience if we choose so.

Every experience allows us the opportunity to humble and accept our vulnerability. We are vulnerable to sickness, pain, death, emotions, others, earthquakes, and a myriad of others things. Let's stop fighting the Truth and accept it as our reality.

Learn more:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/101.html

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93: Controlling with "Kindness" Nov 26, 2022

Control is the opposite of freedom. Just because you control kindly or politely does not justify your behavior. Learn how all of us control on a daily basis and how that creates disconnection. We cannot be connected with ourselves, others, or God when we control.

View our link below for more learning:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/library.html

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92: Repentance–Key to Freedom Nov 26, 2022

Jodi discusses the imperative need to repent. How many times do you hurt someone and yourself and forget about it? Repentance allows us to repair relationships—starting with your relationship with self. As you clean up your side of the street you allow connection to prosper and thrive. If you neglect to change, you will continue to suffer optional pain because it will continue to eat away at you. A lack of repentance will lead to addictions, depression, anxiety, and all other mentally and spiritually destructive thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.

Thankfully there is a way out . . . Repentance! Listen to our other podcasts:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/podcasttopics-basics.html

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91: Love vs Lust in Relationships Nov 25, 2022

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90: 3 Core Principles for Relationships Nov 25, 2022

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89: Mistake vs Intentional Choice Nov 25, 2022

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88: Expectations Nov 25, 2022

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87: Emotional & Logical Wisdom Nov 25, 2022

We mostly hear about feeling or thinking. Why not use both gifts to find Truth?

Jodi Hildebrandt is amazing at explaining exactly how to use our emotions and logic to search and find Truth. Truth is eternal, everlasting, knowable by a third party, and non-changeable. As we find Truth, peace is achieved.

If you like this video tune into all of our weekly podcasts for more critical material that will help anyone looking for Truth.

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/podcast-topics.html

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86: Making & Keeping Commitments Nov 25, 2022

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85: Perfectionism–The "Perfect" Lie Nov 25, 2022

Jodi gives great applicable knowledge on how we all try to control and "perfect-ionize" in our own lives. As she share her own vulnerable personal experiences you will see the need to change your own controlling habits and thereby be freed from this venomous lie that "I have to be perfect". Enjoy and give us feedback on how your experience is listening.

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84: Denial on the Nile Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, while floating down "da" Nile, Jodi explains denial. A simplification of what denial is and it manifests itself in our lives. Many examples from her own life are shared along with the secret on how to get out: Honesty, Humility, and Responsibility. You will enjoy this ride down the Nile as we talk of Denial.

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83: Judgement–A Conscience Choice Nov 25, 2022

Choice is the greatest power we have as human beings. In this episode, Jodi talks about how we interpret experiences, and how our interpretations (whether or not we are aware of them) create our emotions and influence our choices. By becoming aware of the process of interpretation, emotion, and choice, we can make conscious, aware decisions instead of following our automatic perceptions and interpretations.

Jodi shares a personal example of the power of perceptions and the ability to choose consciously or unconsciously.

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82: Parenting–Boundaries with Children Nov 25, 2022

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81: Family Dynamics–Rules & Roles Nov 25, 2022

Jodi explains how the dynamics of our childhood family relationships create our understanding of our rules and roles throughout our lives. By being aware of the rules and roles you were taught in childhood, you can be honest and Truthful—by recognizing what rules and roles are in Truth and which are in distortion. Then, you have the power to consciously choose which roles and rules you will keep and which you will change. This awareness and conscious choice is the precursor to deep connection with yourself and others.

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80: Parenting–Control & Co-Dependency Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi explains where co-dependency & control come from and how they can affect (and "infect") our children, as well as what to do to inoculate our children against these emotional maladies.

Co-dependency is an irresponsible attachment to people and/or things; I want that person or thing to “take care” of me, be responsible for me, “make me feel better,” or “rescue me” (control me). Co-dependency is addiction; I attach to other people—or things, or emotions, or food, or money—to “extract” value and worth from them, so I can feel/be “enough,” “whole,” “wanted,” “valued,” and “needed.”

Care-taking is a dishonest and manipulative attempt to “make” you or someone else meet my needs. Care-taking looks like I am giving to another person, yet it is not a gift and it is not free. I am “giving” with an agenda and expectation that I will receive something in return.

Get your own book and DVD on Co-Dependency and Care-Taking today:

https://www.connexionsclassroom.com/store/p64/library/dvds/bundles

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79: Repentance–Through Clean Up (Part Two) Nov 25, 2022

In this episode Jodi explains the core principles that govern this process of learning from and "cleaning up" the past, to gain freedom and connection in the present.

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78: Repentance–Through Clean Up (Part One) Nov 25, 2022

In this episode Jodi explains the core principles that govern this process of learning from and "cleaning up" the past, to gain freedom and connection in the present.

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77: Control–Absence of Responsibility Nov 25, 2022

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76: Parenting–Triggers Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi gives practical tools parents can use to teach their children to identify, understand, and be responsible for their OWN triggers. This one skill of recognizing and processing triggers is one of the most empowering, liberating principles you can teach your children—you will be giving them the power to change their own lives!

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75: Parenting–Emotional Development in Children Nov 25, 2022

Jodi explains the physical, emotional and spiritual needs children have. As those needs are met and they are taught to progressively meet their needs for themselves, they will very naturally develop into emotionally connected, responsible adults. If, on the other hand, those needs are not met and/or they are not taught to meet their own needs as they grow up, they will have a high propensity to gradually disconnect and develop addictive and destructive thought and behavioral patterns.

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74: Parenting–Disconnection a Silent Killer Nov 25, 2022

Jodi explains how your children can become emotionally disconnected—and if you do not understand distortion, you won't even recognize that they are disconnecting! Get equipped to recognize the signs and symptoms of distorted thinking, so you can inoculate your children against disconnection, and guide them back into connection if they choose to disconnect!

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73: Selfishness Nov 25, 2022

What is selfishness? What causes it? Why do so many of us struggle to let go of our self-focused attitudes and habits? And why is selfishness on the rise in the 21st century? In this two-episode series, Jodi breaks down the topic of selfishness: what it is, where it comes from, and how to shift out of it.

Selfishness is NOT an intentional attitude for us as humans. When we behave selfishly, it's not that we are bad people, or that we are trying to be rude, unfriendly, or mean. It's not that we want to destroy or end relationships. Selfishness is not an attitude we want or are even aware of in ourselves. We engage in selfishness when we are afraid that we are out of control! Selfishness is a desperate attempt to control! We fear vulnerability and our inability to control our vulnerability. From that place of fear, we believe distortions and become self-focused (selfish).

In the 21st century, many of the younger generation are being enabled to engage in incredible selfishness. As parents, mentors, teachers, leaders and friends, we have the charge to understand selfishness and invite our loved ones out of it—and into the Truth.

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72: Parenting–Teaching the Power of Choice Nov 25, 2022

In this episode Jodi explains why it is so important to teach your children about the power and responsibility of their choices. The pattern of choice and outcome / consequence is the most powerful way we learn as humans. Our choices and their outcomes have the power to teach us to empathize, connect, and develop depth and love. If this pattern of choice and consequence is interrupted (i.e. by co-dependency or care-taking), children are handicapped in the process of learning to empathize.

This topic is profoundly important, because children who grow up without experiencing the natural / appropriate consequences from their choices become narcissistic—they do not feel empathy. And this style of narcissism is reaching epidemic proportions in our world.

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71: Parenting & Technology–Kate Dalley Show Nov 25, 2022

A big thanks to Kate Dalley for interviewing Jodi today on her radio show, on 1450 AM KZNU. This episode is the recording of that interview. Kate publishes her shows at www.KateDalleyRadio.com

They discuss the role of parents in protecting children from the tidal wave of technology-induced disconnection that is sweeping our nation and our world. The show includes practical parenting strategies as well as a call for all of us to become more emotionally connected, more validating, more empathic.

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70: Motives Nov 25, 2022

What drives you? What gets you out of bed in the morning? What is behind the choices you make during the day? What do you do when you feel strong emotion? Do you bury it? Shut it down? Express it? Blame others with it? How emotionally connected are you? Are you aware of your motives? Do you know what you're feeling?

Many, many of us are detached (disconnected) from the power of our emotions, and thus, we do not have access to our motives—we are unaware of them! In this podcast, Jodi explains how to reconnect with yourself (your emotions) in a way that is honest, responsible, and humble—and thus begin filling yourself with emotional wisdom and awareness of your motives!

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69: Protective Gift of Enmity (Anger) Nov 25, 2022

Most of us probably wouldn't classify anger & enmity (opposition / hostility) as a gift or as a connecting strategy. However, anger is INCREDIBLY important! When you disconnect, you go numb, and your energy and power to defend, fight for, advocate for, and defend yourself, your family, your children—is GONE! You have a responsibility to 1) reconnect with your God-given gift of anger, and 2) use it wisely and responsibly, to protect, defend and boundary—and NOT to harm or destroy.

This podcast is a call for all of us to wake up, connect with ALL of our emotions, and thus embody the wisdom, power and Truth that is our privilege as humans—in order to fulfill our responsibilities, stand up for Truth, stand against evil, and develop real love, as parents, teachers, mentors, friends, husbands, wives, brothers and sisters in the human family.

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68: Judging vs Judgmental Nov 25, 2022

You've probably heard the phrase "You shouldn't judge" before. Perhaps you avoid confronting inappropriate behavior because you don't want to appear judgmental—or because you fear being judged by others. Or perhaps you comply with others' expectations in order to avoid feeling like others are judging you. Many, many of us have misunderstandings and distortions around the idea of judging. In Reality, we each must judge. The ability to judge between alternatives and make sound judgments is a spiritual, emotional and intellectual gift we each possess. How do we use this ability in Truth instead of distortion?

In this episode, Jodi clearly explains the difference between judging (in Truth) and being judgmental (in distortion). This is a vital, powerful distinction.

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67: Recovery Check-In's Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi explains how to recognize if you (or another person) is connected or not. Every one of us is looking for connection and love—we need it like air. Yet, connection is based on particular principles that govern it. Connection cannot be forced, manipulated or bought. The process of checking in gives you the opportunity to know whether or not you are connected, and to shift quickly out of distortion and into connection.

In this episode, Jodi finishes teaching about the check-in process, which will support you to know "where you are" emotionally throughout the day, so that you can stay connected as often as possible.

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66: Connecting Language–Perceptions Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi talks about the meanings we each personally place onto words. When we don't find out what words mean to others, we are set up for miscommunication. Jodi talks about specific strategies to learn about others' meanings and thus avoid unnecessary conflict and understand one another more completely. We are each responsible to find out "what that means" when we communicate with others!

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65: Connecting Language–Words and Their Meanings Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. A lot of relationship conflict is the result of miscommunication. And a lot of societal conflict is the result of “political correctness.” In both cases, the problem is the same: one person or group has one meaning for a word, and another person or group has a different meaning. We get into conflict (drama) when we attempt to impose our meaning onto someone else’s words. Communication breaks down. We each have the responsibility to understand one another—to learn what the other person means when they use a word, before we react in fear or anger. The question, “Who defines what words mean?” pertains to every single relationship on the planet.

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64: Connecting Language–"I'm Sorry" Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. Why do you say sorry? What does “sorry” mean to you? What is the purpose of the word, “sorry”? In this episode, Jodi discusses the power of the phrase “I am sorry” when used in Truth vs in distortion. When “sorry” is backed up by action, it has the power to heal. When it is insincere, it is like pouring salt in an open wound. “Sorry” has the power to heal or hurt.

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63: Connecting Language–"And" vs "But" Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. In this episode, Jodi talks about the importance of accepting vulnerability, being emotionally honest, living in personal responsibility, and being humble. These principles bear the fruit of connection. If you want the fruit of connection, you must do the work required to grow the plant that bears the fruit. In this episode, Jodi describes a language tool that will help you grow your very own “connection plant” by living in honesty and responsibility. That tool is all about using the word “AND.”

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62: Loss & Grief Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt All of us, no matter our age or background, have experienced loss. It is a part of the human experience. How do we manage our experiences of loss? We can choose to block them and disconnect from self and/or others, or we can learn to grieve our losses and thereby experience connection to self, others, God / Higher Power, and Reality through our losses. Loss is meant to connect us in vulnerability, validation and connection. The rawness and “weakness” of the experience, and the lack of control over the loss, are invitations to connect. In this episode, Jodi explains why grieving is vitally important to living in connection with self, others and God / Higher Power. She teaches how to open oneself and be vulnerable in order to grieve one’s losses. After listening to this episode, you will be empowered to create connection in your painful experiences of loss that will inevitably come to young and old as a vitally important part of our life experience.

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61: Drama–Connection vs Disconnection Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt In this episode, Jodi explains in detail what it means to be connected vs. disconnected. With those definitions in place, Jodi tells another installment in her continuing saga of road-trip vacation experiences. In every experience, we each are constantly interpreting the experience and assigning meaning to various emotions, people, and other parts of the experience. Doing so in Truth means empathizing with self and others by staying open, emotionally honest, and connected with self. Or, we can become reactionary (go into drama) and disconnect from self and from the experience. Jodi tells about how she experienced both connection and disconnection within herself and coming from others around her in the experience.

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60: Fear & Perceptions Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi tells a story about an out-of-control experience she had in the jungles of Guatemala, where fear and panic drove an overwhelming desire to control her experience. She explains the mechanisms of control. In next week’s episode, Jodi will explain how to surrender control.

Jodi finishes telling a story about an out-of-control experience she had in the jungles of Guatemala, where fear and panic drove an overwhelming desire to control her experience. Surrender is the antidote to the illusion of control. Jodi explains how to surrender control, and shares how she endeavored to surrender her fear/control in Guatemala.

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59: Drama–Confronting vs Contention Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi tells a story about an experience she had while boating. She incorporates most of the principles & concepts discussed in previous episodes of the podcast, including how perceptions drive control, which creates the need to surrender, and how drama creates fear, and drives me to get angry, how co-dependency plays out as drama, and so forth. If you’ve been listening in to all of the past episodes, this episode will tie the concepts together for you. If you’re new to the podcast, listening to past episodes first (especially those covering the topics listed above) will support you to get more out of this episode.

Jodi finishes her boating story and speaks in detail about the differences between contention and confrontation. Confronting is, in fact, a very loving, necessary, healthy behavior, in order to connect with self and others. Confronting is not automatically contentious. Contention is about drama, whereas confronting is about sharing.

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58: Self-Love, Vulnerability, & Connection Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt All of us want to create intimate connection with others, and true connection requires connection to oneself first. In this episode, Jodi explains the ways we connect to ourselves through emotional honesty (integrity & accountability for what you feel) and self-care. She explains what prevents genuine connection, and gives examples from her own life, about staying connected to her emotions in the reality of vulnerable and uncomfortable experiences. Jodi answers questions from listeners and talks about some of the strategies she uses to care for herself physically, emotionally and spiritually. Connection is prevented by: Undealt-with trauma conflicts (drama) [Episode 26: Drama] Lack of education Resentments Control issues (out of control / being controlling) Taught not to feel emotions Fear / anger / blame If I don’t learn something different, I will repeat what I learned in childhood. I need to be taught how to connect. Much of the disconnect is because of lack of education. Many of us have no idea how to create it. Staying connected is facilitated by your ability to validate and be vulnerable. Connecting with self and staying connected happens when you live in your integrity and emotional honesty (accountability for what you feel). Emotional honesty creates empathy, vulnerability, validation, compassion, Reality, and accuracy within you.

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57: Unconditional Self-Love Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt In this episode, Jodi discusses the crucially important topic of self-care or self-love. When I love myself and care for myself, I hold beliefs and live a lifestyle where I see myself and all others as truly equal in value. Loving myself is, in fact, the only avenue to genuinely loving others. Self-care involves practicing principles of impeccable emotional honesty, vulnerability, validating, and surrendering. Through self-care, I learn about myself and I learn to love myself unconditionally.

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56: Connection vs Control Nov 25, 2022

What is the difference between connection and control? It may seem simple on paper however the majority of us struggle with seeing controlling mentalities and behaviors in our lives. Connection means being honest, responsible, and humble (HRH). Control is the exact opposite. When we lie to "make" child feel better about themselves we are attempting to control them and are disconnected. Connection cannot exist it with lies, irresponsibility, and pride. When we control we are acting very selfishly because "I want them to like me" rather than "I want to share the Truth with them and be connected." The Truth will set us free if we so choose.

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55: Drama–Inviting Someone Out Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt Every moment, we are either connected (in Reality) or disconnected (in drama). When someone is in drama, they are not experiencing the accurate reality. To have the greatest opportunity to come back into reality, the person is in need of 3 things: Validation of their emotions Curious questions about their experience The Truth — Feedback (invitation to come back into reality) In this episode, Jodi gives multiple examples of how to invite someone to come out of drama and into the Truth through validation and feedback.

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54: Perceptions & Boundaries Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi differentiates between factual honesty (being truthful about external facts, such as “I have a blue car”) and emotional honesty (being truthful about my motivations and emotions, such as “I do not like the blue color of my car”). Boundaries are how we are emotionally honest with self and others. Emotional honesty means coming to know yourself. Knowing yourself enables you to create boundaries, which teach others (and self) how to interact with you in ways that are honest and safe.

“Emotional honesty is what allows you to perceive your world accurately." Jodi answers more questions, including why “little white lies” don’t have a place in emotional honesty.

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53: Healthy Relationships Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. This podcast is a mixed bag of excellent questions on a variety of topics. How do you become comfortable with speaking up, when you don’t know for sure whether it’s healthy or in drama? What is the difference between co-dependency and addiction? How do I help my children understand these concepts (for example, drama). I tried to explain drama to them, however I felt like the content was a bit heavy. Would you please discuss how to give vocabulary and ideas that would be easier for kids to understand? What is the difference between setting boundaries, vs. lowering your expectations? How do you start knowing yourself? How do you tell if your perception is the truth, vs. your truth?

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52: Validation & Vulnerability Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. Vulnerability is difficult for us to manage as humans. However, it also gives us the opportunity to be validated and to connect in healthy, safe, bonded relationships. In this podcast, Jodi answers the following questions: Why is seeking validation so difficult? How do I overcome the obstacles that make it difficult? What is the best way to rebuild trust and safety in a relationship? How do I get a child to open up and share, and be willing to be vulnerable? My child is a “stuffer” like me. How does validation change when you take it to a social media platform? Can there ever be too much validation? Or validation for unhealthy behaviors? I think people turn to social media to be validated, even when they should be held accountable instead. How does the new social dynamic change the nature of validation?

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51: Shame's Affects on Relationships Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. In this episode, Jodi answers four listener's questions about shame as it plays out in relationships. Questions from Listeners: Can you push shame onto someone else? If it is the truth that you cannot make someone feel something, wouldn’t it also be true that you can’t shame anyone? How are Faulty Core Beliefs (shame) linked to triggers? How do thoughts drive emotions? How do Faulty Core Belief thoughts drive fears? How can I change them into positive thinking and positive emotions? What are the steps I can take in re-establishing trust when someone has hurt me? Is it wise to trust someone who has a history of lying?

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50: Personal Responsibility vs False Beliefs Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. In this episode, Jodi answers 5 questions from listeners. This week’s questions are about taking responsibility for Faulty Core Beliefs / shame. Questions from listeners: Do we need to remember the event(s) that created our Faulty Core Beliefs, or is simply recognizing Faulty Core Beliefs in our lives enough? If I’m in a conversation and I feel like I’m not managing messages from The Voice (my shame / Faulty Core Beliefs / triggers), how do I exit the conversation, get centered and come back? What is the best way to share information about The Voice (shame) and Faulty Core Beliefs, from a loving perspective? What if I share and someone become defensive or threatened, and they shut down and don’t want to hear it? What can I do? Why do we diminish (shame) ourselves to others, and then allow others to have power over us (shame us)? How do we hold boundaries, be vulnerable, and take responsibility for our own thoughts and feelings? Cultural & generational shame: How is shame passed down in families and cultures? How can we better identify those shame messages when they are pervasively taught as the norm?

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49: Outcomes of Distortion Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt In this episode, Jodi answers more questions about shame: How do I love with expectations? How do I not allow someone else’s shame from affecting me and/or my child? How do I recognize perfectionism and not let it hinder my growth?

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48: Distortion in Relationships Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt In this episode, Jodi teaches the definition of The Voice / shame (and its cover-up, which is pride and arrogance). After giving an overview of The Voice (shame), Jodi answers 3 questions from listeners: How do you repair and help heal a child that you have been unconsciously passing your shame (messages from The Voice) onto? How do you put this information into childlike language that a child can understand? How do you validate someone who is mad at you for something you’ve done wrong? How do you heal from extremely toxic (shame-based) relationships, when they don’t have awareness of their behavior? Please ask Jodi your questions, and she will answer them on future podcasts! For more detail about shame, listen to the following podcasts: Shame is NOT Guilt! “The Faulties”

Jodi answers more excellent questions about addressing shame in relationships with self and others: How do you do your best at something without The Voice (shame)? How do you re-evaluate safety when you recognize that relationships are unhealthy or co-dependent? What is the difference between “getting rid of the list” (not holding past actions over the other person’s head) and navigating a relationship where one or both partners are not safe for the other? How do you build trust when it has either been broken or has (in retrospect) never really been established in a marriage in the first place? Do I need to go back to my childhood to identify where The Voice (shame) came from, or can I simply recognize I have it and move forward, shining truth on it?

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47: Knowing & Becoming Your True Self Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt “Knowing oneself … is all about being curious about you.” In order to love yourself, in order to validate yourself, in order to heal your Faulty Core Beliefs, you must know yourself. How do you get to know yourself? Are you curious about who you are and why you do what you do? In this episode, Jodi discusses how to get into the Truth about yourself and others, validate yourself, stop judging self and others, become curious, and come to know (and become) who you really are.

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46: Self-Care & Love Nov 25, 2022

In our modern society, we put a lot of emphasis—possibly more than ever before—on taking care of oneself. Most often, when we speak of “taking care of oneself” we focus on caring for the needs of the physical body, such as hygiene, diet, exercise, sleep, and so forth. A more complete version of self-care is self-love. To love oneself means practicing self-care for one’s soul as well as the body. This type of self-care and self-love (which is the only way to truly, honestly love another person) is a solo act; no other person on the planet can do it for us. In this episode, Jodi explains how we can enter and live in this Reality of personal responsibility and love.

Caring for oneself is a personal responsibility, as many of us would agree. Yet, it’s so easy to be unaware and unconsciously attempt to “make” someone else take care of me, my wants and/or my needs. This week, Jodi explains the component of responsibility in relation to self-care.

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45: Commitment, Character, & Change Nov 25, 2022

Episode 45: Commitment, Character, & Change by Jodi Hildebrandt

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44: Emotional Honesty & Safety Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt In this episode, Jodi defines and discusses the principle of emotional honesty. Emotional honesty creates secure attachment to self and in our relationships (such as with parents, children, spouse, friends, etc.). We must become emotionally honest within ourselves before we are able to be emotionally honest with others. While we can attach to self and others without emotional honesty, we will not feel safe and relaxed in those relationships. Becoming emotionally honest is the only way to experience deep, safe, complete connection within self and with others. To build trust in a relationship, both individuals must be emotionally honest. To be emotionally honest, you must know yourself fully. In this episode, Jodi explains how you can know yourself, learn to be emotionally honest, and experience true connection with self, others and God or your Higher Power.

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43: Family Dynamics Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt During the Christmas season, so many of us reunite with family, and we experience the relationship dynamics at work in our families (the sweet and the bitter!). In this episode, Jodi talks about the relationship dynamics within families of origin (childhood). Unless we consciously choose to change them, our childhood family dynamics affect us throughout our lives (in supportive and/or destructive manners) and carry over from childhood into our adult relationships.

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42: Honesty vs Dishonesty Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt What is honesty? How truthful and honest are you with yourself? How honest are you about the way you perceive things? Do you question the way that you conceptualize and speak? In this episode Jodi discusses the definition and importance of emotional honesty—honesty and responsibility around your internal (emotional) world. Emotional honesty means knowing about all of my feelings and emotions, triggers and responses, perceptions, and so forth. I am responsible to learn about myself and manage myself in a way that is truthful.

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41: Power of Choice Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt As human beings, we are endowed with incredible power to choose. Outcomes always follow our choices, whether or not we are aware of the choices we are making. As you and I become conscious of our choices, we are enabled to choose powerful and constructive outcomes. Our choices have emotional outcomes, physiological outcomes, and tangible / external outcomes. Our thoughts and perceptions have outcomes. We can choose to “hold” or perceive our experiences any way we choose. We can be unconscious about our choice of perceptions and perceive life as a victim, or we can be conscious and deliberate and choose to perceive our experiences in Truth.

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40: Gratitude–A Gift for Self Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt This weekend we celebrate Thanksgiving in the United States. It’s a time to count our blessings and practice being grateful for all we’ve been given. But being grateful doesn’t mean losing self. Rather, it means remaining in your integrity (being emotionally honest) and giving to self and others without expectations or “strings attached.” It sounds paradoxical, yet the only way to be truly grateful towards other people is to be grateful and appreciative towards yourself. This practice of self-care means setting boundaries for myself, which enables you to truly connect with self, others and God or a Higher Power.

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39: Manipulation Nov 25, 2022

Every person on the planet has used manipulation strategies to obtain a desired outcome. Most often, we manipulate unconsciously or without awareness. Many of us manipulate occasionally, and some of us “live” in a state of manipulation and use its strategies constantly. In this episode, Jodi introduces several types or styles of manipulation and explains how to recognize them. The skill of recognizing manipulation in yourself and in your relationships is an invaluable tool to protect yourself and your relationships, and to engage the principles of honesty, responsibility and humility in all aspects of your life.

Manipulation is something we ALL use, and we all need to become awake to, in order to protect ourselves and our loved ones. In this episode, Jodi explains how to recognize manipulators (those who live a lifestyle of manipulation, as opposed to occasionally manipulating). Manipulators groom victims using several strategies, including indulging the person, using fear or intimidation tactics, attempting to break the person’s spirit, showing “loving” gestures in order to get what they want (such as sex), behaving in very grandiose or arrogant or pompous manners, or even behaving as though they are victims, so others will feel sorry for them. Manipulators also change the meanings of words and re-define what they said previously. If you feel “crazy,” the chances are high that you are being manipulated. If you recognize manipulation within yourself or coming from your relationships, seek the help of a therapist or a healthy individual who can be unbiased and truthful with you and help you to see the Reality. When manipulation is not challenged, it will not leave a relationship.

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38: Control & Denial Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi discusses the strong desire we all have as humans to control situations, outcomes and emotions, and how our controlling behaviors are set-ups to experience The Voice (shame) and denial. The Truth is, we live out of control, and we cannot control our environment. Therefore, in order to attempt to control, we must use denial strategies. In this episode, Jodi discusses some of the most common denial strategies: Helpless / Hopeless Uniqueness / Different Rationalizing Minimizing Justifying Compartmentalizing More denial strategies to come in next week’s episode.

The discussion is on the definition of denial, why we all use denial, and how we often use denial strategies without realizing we are doing so. At its core, our desire to deny reality is simply our difficulty and/or unwillingness to feel and manage pain and discomfort of any type. As humans, we have a difficult time managing painful experiences. Towards the end of this episode, Jodi give examples and definitions of more denial strategies not covered in last week’s episode: Comparing Omission Creating Distractions Manipulation Complying Intellectualizing Blaming

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37: Principles of Recovery Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt Recovery is not the same as sobriety. Sobriety means choosing not to engage in a particular behavior or substance (our drug of choice). On the other hand, recovery refers to an entire lifestyle of humility, honesty and responsibility, where we learn to love, honor and respect self and others. Recovery addresses the underlying emotional and spiritual reasons we engage in the behaviors or substances. Recovery allows us to no longer have the “need” to alter our emotional experiences — it allows us to experience our emotional realities in the Truth, and move through them without becoming shamed or “stuck.”

Why do we become addicted to people, activities, substances, etc.? What causes addiction? And how do we heal from them? This week’s episode is about several principles of addiction and recovery, including: Bottom lines Slips Relapse White-knuckling Withdrawal symptoms Powerlessness Cross-addiction Surrender & thinking in honesty In order to recover from the underlying emotional causes of addiction, a person must: Live in emotional truth & be honest with self and others Maintain personal accountability Live a humble lifestyle Not alter or deny the reality of their life or their experiences. We must all embrace & accept life exactly as it presents itself to us. Experience and feel all emotions as they are connected to every experience Share with another person how they feel, and ask for validation and empathy. We all need at least one person to allow us to be vulnerable and risk. Surrender and let go of what they cannot control. Learn to live in the reality of life and not distort the perception of reality. Impeccable honesty, rigorous responsibility and humility eclipse the drive to emotionally or physically alter the experience. As you live these principles, you will grow in wisdom, power, and emotional & spiritual depth. Your mindset and lifestyle will change as you recognize that emotions give information about yourself and others. You will then be able to accept all experiences and allow them to teach you. You will become whole and connected, so you won’t crave escape and distortion.

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36: Addictive Voice of Shame & Distortion Nov 25, 2022

The Voice (shame) is at the root of all addictions. When any of us become addicted to food, money, sex, gambling, exercise, anger or other attitudes, hoarding, drugs, or anything else, the addiction is not the problem. The addiction is a symptom. The reason we become addicted to such a variety of activities, substances and thinking patterns is that we are using these things ("externals") to medicate the pain we feel because we believe The Voice (shame) and thus we emotionally disconnect. As we learn to reframe our experiences and recognize the Truth about our choices, thoughts and perceptions, we no longer have a "need" for addiction. We must learn to choose to feel and experience our true emotions (even if uncomfortable) which come with every experience, without attempting to change, alter or manipulate our reality. When we exercise the power of choice within us to become emotionally honest, personally responsible and humble individuals, we live in integrity and become individuals of character. This is the lifestyle of recovery from addiction & The Voice (shame).

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35: Power of Perceptions Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt Our perceptions have monumental power in our lives. What we perceive becomes reality to us. How we perceive our experiences in life determines our thoughts, emotions and attitudes around every experience. Our perceptions create our motives and agendas, and set us up to listen to The Voice (go into shame/Faulty Core Beliefs), or go into Truth. Therefore, the skill of being aware of what we think, how we feel, and why we perceive as we do, will empower us to understand ourselves, hold our emotions in honesty and responsibility, learn the lessons our traumatic experiences are trying to teach us, and empathize and feel compassion for others. When we are aware and conscious, then we can choose with power.

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34: Characteristics of Healthy & Unhealthy Relationships Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt Emotional and spiritual safety are often overlooked, because they are not tangible and concrete, however, they are vital to all healthy relationships. How safe are you, emotionally and spiritually? This episode begins with an invitation to self-assess by answering several questions. Emotionally healthy relationships embody certain characteristics, such as empathy, self-respect, freedom to be self, trust and safety. Emotional safety is forged as we are willing to become emotionally mature by taking feedback, taking responsibility for our own thoughts, feelings and choices, and being impeccably honest.

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33: Lust in Our Modern World Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt Why is pornography such a rampant problem in today’s world? Why are so many people being “sucked in” to pornography, sexual and other addictions? Lust and disconnection are the culprits, and in our society, there are myriad opportunities and ways to disconnect from ourselves and others, and access lustful thinking. Messages bombard us from television, movies, the Internet, advertisements, music, video games, and so forth. Silent assumptions about roles, responsibilities, love, lust and other areas of life can alter our thinking without our knowledge. In this podcast, which contains information from the upcoming “Love vs. Lust” workbook and videos, Jodi covers a lot of ground, discussing ways lust and disconnection can creep into our lives, and how we can change our thinking, be on guard and protect ourselves and our families against encroaching disconnection.

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32: Healthy Attraction & Sexuality Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt We all desire and need connection, yet many of us have never been taught the skill-set to connect in our relationships. It does not “just happen” as we might think. When bonding (including honesty, compassion, responsibility, validation, vulnerability, safety and humility) is present in any relationship, connection is the outcome, with anyone and every time. When we are honest and responsible, we embody and claim our roles as men and women, and we are able to create connection and experience the fulness of our sexual and spiritual power.

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31: Connection, Love, & Healthy Sexuality Nov 25, 2022

There are many types of connection which we share with one another, including spiritual, emotional, intellectual, sensual, physical and sexual. So often, so many of us are deceived to believe that "connection" requires sexual connection. This is not the case. Sexual connection is only one type of connection, and unless the other types of connection are present, sexual acts will not lead to connection at all. There is great confusion surrounding these topics of what love, sexuality and connection are. Jodi breaks down these topics and explains them clearly, along with some real-world examples of how we are taught very confusing messages by our culture.

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30: Self-Forgiveness Nov 25, 2022

Many of us struggle to forgive ourselves, even after we "clean up" or make right our mistakes with all others who have been affected. We may feel not only that we did wrong, but that we are bad. This The Voice (shame) precludes us from feeling guilt, offering forgiveness and experiencing a change of heart. Choosing guilt, repentance and forgiveness rather than The Voice (shame) will alleviate and protect you from suffering. Forgiving self is very challenging. In this podcast, Jodi walks through the process of recognizing, forgiving self and moving on. This process allows us to experience a change of heart, which is permanent change.

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29: Repentance & Reparation Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt The word “repentance” has triggering or religious associations for many people. I’d like to use the word not in a religious way, but instead to mean a complete, thorough process of change. When the process of repentance is engaged rigorously and completely, you change—your shame dissipates, your responsibility increases, your guilt is cared for, and your character is modified for the good. There is a specific, 10-step process we must all engage in order to engage the power of repentance and reconnect with self, others and God.

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28: False Beliefs–What Lies Beneath Distortion Nov 25, 2022

This week, I expand on the idea of The Voice (shame) and introduce the idea of Faulty Core Beliefs -- a super important topic. When we feel shame and don't take responsibility (or don't know how) to move out of it, we "swallow" impressions that we are different from others, bad, unlovable, unworthy, etc. Our brains try to make sense of why we feel this way, and the results are beliefs about our core person that are distorted, self-aggressive, and flat wrong. As you can probably imagine, these beliefs are quite destructive. So how do we deal with them? That's the topic for this week.

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27: Anger & Resentments Nov 25, 2022

This week, I discuss the often-difficult emotion of anger. It can be difficult to manage, but anger is not bad. Emotions aren't "good" or "bad." They simply give us information, and we get to learn to respond to our emotions appropriately. How do we do that? I talk with a caller about anger and its relationships to shame and resentments. I also talk about how our expectations lead to resentments, and how we can choose to manage them.

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26: Guilt vs Shame Nov 25, 2022

Most of the time, we lump shame and guilt into a general idea of "feeling bad about self." In fact, shame and guilt are more opposite than they are similar. In this episode, I talk with two callers about how the two are different, and why shame (The Voice) is so destructive.

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25: Sobriety vs Recovery Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt Very often, the words “sobriety” and “recovery” are used interchangeably, yet they are vastly different. In this episode, Jodi explains in detail the differentiation between these two key terms. Sobriety is the illusion of controlling the body by not partaking of one’s Drug of Choice. Recovery, on the other hand, is a complete change of character, incorporating impeccable emotional honesty, rigorous personal responsibility, and humility.

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24: Humility Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt We always have choice, and with the power of our choice, we can choose humility or pride. Humility opens us to Truth and frees us from illusions—illusions of hatred & bigotry. Living in humility creates an experience of freedom from the illusion of being in control of your external world. Pride is a cover-up for The Voice (shame), and comes from the same source. Humility allows us to feel gratitude, pure love, wisdom, and the ability to empathize with and love others unconditionally—without being judgmental of behavior, but rather recognizing the power of peoples’ spirits. (Note: this does not mean condoning inappropriate behavior. It does mean having compassion for others). Humility is the ability to keep commitments, grow, change, mature and live in gratitude and faith. The choice to engage humility or pride is a choice regarding how we will act, how we will think, how we will perceive and how we will feel. We each have the power to choose humility and Truth.

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23: Connecting Power of Vulnerability Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. In this episode, Jodi tells a powerful personal story illustrating the connecting power of emotional vulnerability and the disconnecting power of the desire to control one’s experiences. The Truth is, we are all vulnerable all the time. And when we have an experience that shows us our vulnerability, The Voice (shame) entices us to attempt to control the experience so that we “don’t have to” experience the discomfort of being out of control. Everybody is looking for connection. It’s so easy to become addicted to anything, precisely because addictions give a false sense of connection!

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22: Surrender–Path of Peace Nov 25, 2022

Attempting to control fearful or uncomfortable situations is so natural. However, control is an illusion. Every one of us is, truthfully, not in control of our life or our circumstances. Surrendering the illusion of control does not mean 'giving up' -- it means beginning a paradoxical way of thinking and perceiving. Surrendering control means we can begin to live free in the true Reality, which generates energy, focus, strength, maturity and great peace.

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21: Boundaries Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi explains boundaries in great detail. She answers questions including:

What are boundaries?

Why do we need boundaries?

What is the purpose of boundaries?

How do I make boundaries?

How do I share and hold boundaries?

How do I model boundaries for others? Jodi also explains why we ALL need boundaries both within ourselves and in our relationships with others. The Truth is, boundaries communicate (and translate into / become) deep feelings of self-love and honor for oneself. And honor and love for self very naturally leads to love and honor for others.

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20: Emotional Honesty=Peace Nov 25, 2022

Emotional honesty includes me expressing my emotions in Truth. If I am in a relationship that includes me expressing to another how I am thinking and feeling. Honesty proceeds connection. Connection cannot exist without emotional honesty. How emotionally honest are you? And your relationships?

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19: Parenting with Responsibility Nov 25, 2022

This episode is about parenting. We’ve received many requests to talk on this subject. In this episode, Jodi explains what children need physically and emotionally, and then zeroes in on one need that, if met, will enable a child (or any person) to have all their other needs met. That need is RESPONSIBILITY. When a child is taught to be responsible for their own thoughts, feelings, and choices, they learn to live life empowered, to meet their own needs, and to ask for help when they need it. Teaching a child to engage in personal responsibility is a large task, and in this podcast, Jodi lays the groundwork for how to do it. Jodi explains 4 tenets of teaching children to be personally responsible: Teach children that they have the ability to choose—and they are ALWAYS choosing (even when they don’t want to). Teach children boundaries Teach children vulnerability Teach children how to think rationally and choose their responses to their emotions.

Jodi answers several questions from parents, about raising children to be responsible. Jodi gives several examples of how to allow children to have the consequences of their choices and be responsible for them, with empathy and safety, and without shame. Questions include: What kind of expectations should I have for my child? What do I expect from them? Are my expectations appropriate? What do you do when children don’t like the rules or the precautions that parents set in place? How do you continue to parent while still allowing them to have autonomy? (How do you hold boundaries with children and still give them choice?) How do you continue to parent children who refuse to respect the boundaries you’ve put up? How often do you talk to your child about current and future responsibilities? How do I correct inappropriate behavior? How do I teach my child to do things that they will be expected to do as an adult? Do I direct their thoughts and goals towards adult responsibilities? How do I teach my child that they affect other people? Do they know how much power they have, and will have as an adult, to affect others for good or bad? I’m wondering how to let my child know that they’re seen and validated by me. How do I teach my child to be responsible about technology How do I direct my child to repent and make full restitution when they make poor choices? Do I hold them accountable to follow through with restitution?

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18: Enabling vs Mercy Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt What is the difference between mercy and enabling? In this episode, Jodi precisely differentiates co-dependent enabling (which is destructive) from mercy. So often, we want to be merciful, show love, “help,” give support, and enable (make things easier for) someone else—or ourselves—to show up in life and keep commitments. We want to empower the person to feel loved, build confidence, and accomplish something. But often, instead of holding behavior accountable (which is merciful) and assisting the person to move through processes of repentance and restitution (which is merciful), and thereby recognize their potential and power (which is merciful), we enable, ignore behavior, and disempower the person we so much want to empower. After listening to this episode, you will be able to distinguish clearly between enabling and mercy, and armed with accurate knowledge, you’ll be able to give the gift of true mercy and truly empower your relationships and yourself, and experience the power and intimacy of interdependent relationships.

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17: How to Confront a Loved One Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt In this episode, Jodi explains how to confront and resolve conflicts with loved ones. Confrontation, when done appropriately, is extremely loving to others and to self. In every relationship, there will be conflict. Conflict is not a bad or scary or wrong thing; it is a human thing. In every conflict, there is some issue that needs to be confronted and addressed. We need to learn to address conflicts—or else the conflict will never go away; it will only be avoided or ignored or pushed down. When issues are addressed, they are truly dealt with and healed. If I avoid or ignore conflicts, I will inadvertently create conflict for the rest of my life, and I will automatically engage addictive behavior and/or substances, and as a result, I will create even more conflict! Although the situation of every conflict is different, it is not unique; all conflicts have similar components. Conflict is usually the result of fear, lack of education, and confusion. There is always a person who is acting out in a way that needs to be intervened on. There is the person (or people) who are needing to intervene on the acting out behavior. Frequently, when we are in this position, we become reactionary or afraid of the person’s acting out behavior. Typically, we either react in shock and horror to a loved one’s acting out behavior, or we join them in their disconnect. Meanwhile, the person who is acting out will grow increasingly numb and disconnected and shamed, which will allow them to engage in more and more egregious behaviors. If you want to heal conflict, you cannot ignore it. It will become more exaggerated instead. Every time. After listening to this episode, you will be better-equipped to confront and intervene in the lives of your loved ones, in ways that are compassionate and empowering.

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16: Distraction & Fantasy Nov 25, 2022

Distractions are disruptions of thought or perception. A distraction is anything which I give time or attention to, which pulls my vision away from the complete Reality going on around me. I become hyper-focused on one aspect or one thought, to the exclusion of all else. Distraction becomes desirable to us whenever our Reality is uncomfortable, painful or otherwise disagreeable to us. We want to “check out” and alter how we feel and what we experience. Rather than remain in Reality, we enter some type of fantasy. Distraction is not bad—it is human. However, when when you or I choose to use distraction as a coping mechanism to avoid feeling and experiencing Reality—or as a reaction to The Voice (shame)—we will attempt to live in distraction, and we will enter state of persistent fantasy. When we live in any type of fantasy (faulty core belief / illusion) we will be deceived about who we are and about the Reality of our life. We will act out our deceptions and become destructive towards self and/or others. Each of us is responsible to become conscious of our fantasies and distractions, and to manage them. Learning to live in Reality is an extremely empowering and maturing experience.

When we are presented with a physically, emotionally, spiritually or otherwise challenging, uncomfortable or painful experience, it is human nature to desire to distract ourselves in order to avoid the discomfort. However, when I use the strategy of distraction to avoid Reality, I set myself up for greater discomfort and pain in the future. Reality will continue to march towards me whether I am prepared for it or not, and if I ignore Reality, I will set myself up to feel confusion, distortion and fear, and thus I will engage more distraction to “manage” the pain and discomfort that comes with every deceptive thought (Faulty Core Belief) which I believe in my distorted state.

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15: Recognizing Addiction Nov 25, 2022

Often, the revelation that a loved one is hiding an addiction is a devastating blow. Yet, there are signs and symptoms of addictive behavior and addictive patterns that you can recognize in yourself and others, before a full-on addiction is created. Dishonesty, secrets, lying, selfishness, manipulation, and deception support addictions to fester and grow. If you want to know whether you or your loved one is moving towards addiction, please don't wait until the consequences have mounted so large that you can't ignore them. Learn the signs and symptoms of a developing addiction, and address it. If addressed early (before they become full-blown, out-of-control addictions), addictive behaviors and patterns are far, far easier to resolve. What are the common signs of addiction? How do people talk and present themselves when addiction or addictive behaviors are present? What is the difference between addictive behaviors, vs a full-blown ADDICTION? In this episode, Jodi explains the signs, patterns and presentations of addiction.

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14: Love vs Lust Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt What is the difference between love and lust? In this episode, Jodi breaks it down in detail and explains why it is crucially important for us to proactively choose to love rather than complacently choose to lust. On vacation in Page, Arizona, Jodi also conducts some street interviews and gets some great answers to the question, “What is the difference between love and lust?” Sneak preview: love is mutual, with an underlying desire to give, while lust is selfish, with an underlying desire to take.

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13: Motive & Choice Nov 25, 2022

Jodi explains how motives are created, how we react or respond to them, why we need to know our motives, how we change them, and how our choices reinforce or change our motives and create the types of outcomes we choose.

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12: Truth Declarations Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt This episode is a follow-up to episode 10, which is about the RAISE process. The final step of RAISE – Engage Truth – is all about recognizing and declaring the Truth about your false beliefs and distorted thoughts. Jodi gives examples and explains how to activate the power of Truth Declarations in your life.

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11: R.A.I.S.E. Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi introduces a very simple skill called “R.A.I.S.E.” – a way to stop distortion, become conscious of Reality, and move out of distortion and into peace. Recognize your emotions, feelings & triggers, ask for validation, invite feedback, spot distorted thoughts/false beliefs, and engage the Truth.

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10: Pain Is Our Teacher Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. What is the purpose of pain? Why do we all experience it — as though it is a rite of passage in life? What does pain teach us? In this podcast, Jodi explains how pain can be the catalyst to love–if you use your power of choice to learn from the pain.

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9: Drama Nov 25, 2022

Drama is a strategy we all use to attempt to connect with others. However, when we are in drama, we are lacking in responsibility for self. Instead, we want others to be responsible for us, and/or we want to be responsible for others. In this episode, Jodi explains the three positions or “characters” of drama: the victim, the rescuer and the persecutor. Whether or not you realize it, you (and everyone else!) have an intimate relationship with all three characters—they show up in many of our relationships. Being conscious about drama empowers you to choose proactive and conscious choices about how you will relate with yourself and others, and to create deep, true connections.

Jodi discusses the power we each have to exit the cycle of drama, through making conscious, honest, responsible choices. If you are willing to become conscious of the lies inside our own emotional and spiritual system, you can change your perceptions and beliefs about yourself, and you will exit drama. Then, you will live in a space called inter-dependency or healthy dependency, where your relationships are truly loving, empowering and full of responsibility. This is living in emotional and spiritual connection with self and others.

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8: Understanding Triggers Nov 25, 2022

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7: Empathy—Spiritual Medicine Nov 25, 2022

Empathy truly is spiritual medicine. The act of empathy is an act of validation and pure love, where we say to another person, "I see you. I know who you really are. You matter. I understand how you feel, and why feel that way, and it makes sense." Empathy means letting go of oneself and experiencing another person's emotions with them. How do we develop, give and receive empathy? It requires vulnerability and a willingness to risk emotionally with another person. Empathy is a skill, and anybody can learn it if they are willing to be vulnerable, humble, and emotionally honest and responsible. In this episode I talk about what empathy is, how we develop the skill set to give and receive it, and what incredible healing power empathy has for any human soul.

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6: Vulnerability, Validation, & Risk Nov 25, 2022

The act of empathy comprises three vital principles of emotional and spiritual intimacy in relationships: vulnerability, validation and emotional risk. Validation is the skill of being emotionally present with another person, of dropping self and experiencing emotions of another person for a time, to accurately see and understand and empathize with them. Vulnerability is the act of being emotionally open, raw, and willing to share oneself. Vulnerability is vital in order to allow self or others to validate us. Vulnerability requires us to risk emotionally--to put oneself in a position where we could suffer pain, upset, discomfort or hurts. We must learn to risk in healthy, conscious manners, rather than in unconscious and unhealthy manners. Healthy emotional risk is absolutely necessary in order to create any type of intimate relationship with self, other people and God. These three skills create empathy, which creates intimate, strong and stable connection and healing.

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5: Boundaries, Responsibility, & Validation Nov 25, 2022

What are boundaries? Why are they important? How do I make them? This week, I talk about personal boundaries. Paradoxically, boundaries are extremely important in relationships. We've each got to have boundaries to separate us as individuals, in order to be intimate with another person. If I don't have boundaries, it means I don't know myself.

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4: Fear Nov 25, 2022

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3: Shame & False Beliefs Nov 25, 2022

In this episode, Jodi breaks down what distorted thoughts are, how they become false beliefs, and how distorted thoughts and false beliefs relate to shame. Distortion is the enemy of connection. In this episode, you'll get to "know thy enemy" in greater detail, so you can live in greater connection.

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2: Understanding Distortion Nov 25, 2022

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1: Connection–The Greatest Human Need Nov 25, 2022

Hosted by Jodi Hildebrandt. In this episode, Jodi explains the greatest human need, which is connection with self, others, and God. Jodi details the heavy toll of disconnection, as well as how to connect emotionally.

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0: Choice & Outcome Nov 25, 2022

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