Java with Juli - Making Sense of God and Sex

Latest Episodes:

What If We Stopped Trying to Win the Culture War?, #626 Nov 02, 2026

Show notes

How do you navigate conversations about sexuality and identity without letting fear, politics, or the pressure to have all the answers get in the way of loving people well?

This week, Juli sits down with Laurence Koo to talk about why questions of identity can feel so overwhelming, and how you can walk alongside someone even when you don't have all the answers. They also challenge the way we think about the "culture wars," explore what it means to see sexuality through the lens of the gospel, and offer a refreshing perspective on singleness, marriage, and authentic community.

Guest: Laurence Koo

Follow-up Resources:

#576 Q&A with Jackie Hill Perry & Laurence Koo

#297 FInding Freedom In the Midst of Brokenness

#298 Sexual Identity Is Big; Identity as God's Child Is Bigger

What's the Most Important Thing the Bible Says About Your Sex Life? (blog by Juli Slattery)

Rethinking Sexuality by Dr. Juli Slattery

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

How to Be Present With God, Yourself, and the Ones You Love, #625 Oct 26, 2026

Show notes

What if God isn't asking you to fix every feeling before you come to Him? What if you could bring Him your anxiety, your frustration, your insecurity—even the parts of yourself you wish weren't there?

This week, Juli's talking with Dr. Alison Cook about learning to notice what's happening inside us without immediately judging, fixing, or shaming our inner thoughts. Plus, you'll hear how understanding our own inner world can change the way we show up in marriage, parenting, and our relationship with God.

Guest: Dr. Alison Cook

Follow-up Resources:

The Secure Soul by Dr. Alison Cook

The Best of You (Dr. Alison's daily podcast)

Take this free quiz from Dr. Alison to discover the role you took on in your family.

Follow Dr. Alison Cook at @dralisoncook

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

Is Your Body Image Stealing Your Joy?, #624 Oct 19, 2026

Show notes

How much have you already thought about your body today?

For many of us, the answer is… a lot. This week, we're talking about the ways body image can quietly shape our mornings, our marriages, our dating lives, our parenting, and the things we're willing to do.

What if our bodies were meant to give us freedom, not keep us stuck?

Guests: Hannah Nitz & Val O'Brien

Follow-up resources:

Being Sexy Has Nothing To Do with Your Body by Juli Slattery (blog)

Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Body Ready by Juli Slattery (blog)

3 Ways that Loving Your Body Builds Intimacy in Marriage by Joy Skarka (blog)

Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

Follow Val O'Brien at @_val_obrien

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

Q&A: Is Masturbation Wrong if My Spouse Can't Please Me? (+8 more), #623 Oct 12, 2026

Show notes

This week, Juli's answering your real questions about sex. Here's what's in the line up:

"What do I do if I don't find my husband attractive?"

"Before marriage, I thought I was dying for sex. Now, it's a chore. Why?"

"I've never had an orgasm and I don't care. Is that wrong?"

"Is it wrong to please myself if my husband can't do it?"

"How does sex point us to God?"

"How do I seduce my wife?"

"What do you do if your spouse decides they "don't actually need" sex?"

"Nothing is off limits. No question is too awkward. Grab your Java and listen in!"

Co-host: Hannah Nitz

Follow-up resources:

Enjoy! The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women by Cliff & Joyce Penner

The Married Guy's Guide to Great Sex by Cliff & Joyce Penner

Hot Topic Kit: Building a Great Sex Life

Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Mind Ready (blog)

Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Body Ready (blog)

Prioritize Sexual Intimacy by Getting Your Bedroom Ready (blog)

Masturbation: Is It Wrong? (blog)

"Is Masturbation a Sin?" You May Be Asking the Wrong Question (blog)

Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

How to Hold On to Your Faith When a Leader Falls, #622 Oct 05, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever found out that a Christian leader you trusted had a major moral or sexual failure…and suddenly wondered, What am I supposed to do with everything they taught me?

Can I still read their books? Can I trust what I learned? Does this mean I could fall too?

This week, we get honest about what happens when someone who shaped your faith falls, and how to remember that Jesus—not our favorite pastor, author, or teacher—is the one we ultimately follow.

Guests: Hannah Nitz, Josiah Bogue

Follow-up Resources:

Rethinking Sexuality by Dr. Juli Slattery

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

Follow Josiah at @josiahdlb

How To Create a Shared Language for Your Sex Life, #365 Sep 28, 2026

Show notes

Sex is never just about sex. That's why simple conversations about it can bring up shame, rejection, past wounds, and seriously different expectations. In this classic Java with Juli conversation with the late Dr. Doug Rosenau, he and Juli talk about why couples need more than a shared bedroom—they need a shared language.

You'll learn how to: • Talk about sex when it feels awkward • Create words that feel safe and meaningful to both of you • Know what to do when a word or request becomes triggering

Listen in now! (Even better—grab your spouse and listen together!)

Guest: Dr. Doug Rosenau

Follow-up Resources:

Hot Topic Kit: Building a Great Sex Life

God, Sex, and Your Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery

A Celebration of Sex by Dr. Doug Rosenau

The Sex Questions Kids are Really Asking, #621 Sep 21, 2026

Show notes

What if the question your teenager is asking isn't really the question they need you to answer?

This week, we're talking with Val O'Brien of the 10,000 Questions Project about what she's learned from collecting thousands of questions from teens. And here's the surprising part: some of the hardest questions about sex and God are really questions about pain. Instead of jumping straight to an answer, what would happen if we got curious? Asked another question?

Sometimes the most important thing a teen needs isn't more information. It's to know, "Do you still love me? Do you see me? Can I tell you the truth?"

Guests: Val O'Brien, Hannah Nitz

Follow-up Resources:

The 10,000 Questions Project

Sex & the Single Girl by Dr. Juli Slattery (updated & expanded edition)

Follow Val O'Brien at @_val_obrien_

Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

Death of the Pastor's Wife: What the Church Needs To Talk About, #620 Sep 14, 2026

Show notes

What happens when a pastor has no accountability?

Or when scripture is used to justify sexual abuse within marraige?

When mental health problems are overlooked?

Netflix's Death of the Pastor's Wife raises some hard questions—and they're questions the church can't afford to shy away from. So we're talking about them.

Co-host: Hannah Nitz

Follow-up Resources:

Ep. #319: Is Good Sex a "Right" in Marriage?

Video Q&A: We Have Sex Regularly But My Spouse Isn't Satisfied. What Do I Do?

Video Q&A: Is It My Responsibility to Meet My Spouse's Needs?

A Church Called Tov by Scot McKnight & Laura Barringer

Find a Christian Counselor

MyCounselor.Online

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-SAFE, or you can text START to 88788

Follow Hannah Nitz @hannahnitz

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy

Taking a Week Off + Our Top 3 Episodes Sep 07, 2026

Show notes

We're taking a break for Labor Day Weekend and we hope you'll get some rest too. In the meantime, check out these popular episodes from this year:

#595 4 Lies We Believe About Sex

#603 5 Ways to Navigate Differences & Build a Stronger Marriage

#612 How Your Story Shapes the Way You Approach Sex & Intimacy

We'll be back right here next week. See you then!

Is It Love or a Pop Quiz? The Tests We Give Our Spouses, #619 Aug 31, 2026

Show notes

We all do it—the little "tests" we give our spouses without ever telling them they're being tested.

Will he notice? Will she remember? Does he even see me? Does she even care?

Maybe it's the party we planned, the extra hours we put in at work, or that new haircut or dress we're hoping they'll notice. We put in the effort…and then quietly wait to see if they pass the test.

And when they don't? Well, let's just say it doesn't always go the way we hoped.

So why do we do this? And is there a better way to get the connection and attention we're really longing for?

Grab your Java and join us for the conversation.

Co-host: Hannah Nitz

We want to hear from you! Did you enjoy this conversation? Leave us a rating & review in your favorite podcast app.

Follow-up Resources:

Finding the Hero in Your Husband by Dr. Juli Slattery

What's It Like to Be Married to Me? And Other Dangerous Questions by Linda Dillow

Blog: Did He Pass the Test? by Juli Slattery

Follow Hannah Nitz at @hannahnitz

Follow Authentic Intimacy at @authenticintimacy